((r-18+ Alfred and food. That is all you need to know if you desire to go on. and of course, Hetalia does not belong to me))

The smell of the store had already been enough to set Alfred's heart racing. His stomach had lead him here despite his best intentions, but it was something more that had caused him to line up to wait his turn to buy his sandwich.

'SUBWAY'

'EAT FRESH'

That stupid chime on the radio as he'd been driving back from work had been the cause of this.

Really.

Not the sign, the way it beconed him from the freeway with the white and yellow letters..oh no, not that.. It was the jingle that had set him off.

He refused to stare at the menu, refused to let himself breathe in more than he should, and he definitely refused to look at those lovely bags of chips on the side of the counter, the way they would crinkle as he lovingly opened them, the first crunch of a chip in his mouth…. Or those hot chocolate chip cookies, melting in his mouth as he took a bite and oh god oh god w-

"Sir, may I take your order?"

He was snapped out of his daydream. Wheat or white? what sort of cheese? meat? Ham? Six inches? Oh maybe he should get a foot long? His throat had long since dried out from the effort of trying to maintain calm, thinking about it would just bring him grief. If this wasn't going to work, he might end up having to run out of here [and all he was thankful for was that Arthur wasn't around].

It'd be easier to just go with a ready made one. Probably. "six in- I mean foot long. Marinara. wheat" He coughed, tugging his shirt down lower, not with people around him.. no nonnono! Heros weren't like that, they weren't. "m-make it a meal" He found his eyes making their way to the food displayed, each lettuce and tomato in their correct place… waiting for him. Shit. He felt the uncomfortable tightness in his pants, he couldn't believe it. So soon? Heros didn't get erections in public. Not like this.

In his defense it had been true that he had deprived himself from eating out for a while!

And with good reason.

Alfred Jones had a fetish, it wasn't even a food fetish, that he could have at least understood. But it was something that grew and changed each time his population found a new fast food restaurant that they loved. He was unaffected by normal food, he could eat at home without problems, go to parties and laugh, be normal.. but if he even as much as set a foot within a McDonalds.

Well there would be a lovely mess in his pants.

Same with Burger King, KFC, In-n-Out, you name it, at first it had been funny. but now it was becoming something he dreaded. Obesity in his country was not something to laugh at, as much as the other countries relished in it. He didn't want to tell them the effect it had on him exactly… It would…. They would use it to an advantage, even abuse it

"It will be 1-"

"debit" He stopped the worker from telling him how much, and he somehow managed to mumble what sort of drink he wanted before paying. This was the worst part, actually touching the food. If he was careful though, he could make it to the car, no matter who saw his erection, it wasn't like they would..recognize him.

He mumbled a thank you, grabbing the bag and sprinting to his car, his whole face a bright red [not too different from the delicious sauce in his bag].

"shit shit shit.." he fumbled with his keys, the soda slipping out of his grasp, drenching all of the front of his pants. He finally forced the door open, climbing in, not caring about the soggy mess, or that the coke was definitely leaving a mark, he still had his damn chips and sandwich and oh thank god he was finally inside his car!

Frenzied, insane, godly, any word he wanted to use to describe his feelings to the sandwich where lost to him as he ripped off the wrapper, marinara sauce dribbling onto his shirt, the seat getting completely stained.

"oh god! yes, come on" His breath grew more ragged as he took the first bite, relief filling him. "Goowhddd" He spoke through mouthfuls to himself "Shhho good…. fuwwck.." Hastily he gulped down his first bite, hacking as he chocked. Bad idea. really bad. oh there it went…Good… He gave a quick look around the parking lot, although more to show decency than restraint -he'd lost that the moment the smell of cheese permeated around the car, and that bulge he was sporting had become unbearable. Finally he pulled off his pants, he wouldn't touch himself [because if somehow /somehow/ Someone found out, then he'd be made fun of for life], this way he could pretend that it was completely normal.

He was just another male in the United states eating Subway in his car.. of course he was. He blasted the music up as far as it would go, drowning himself in the sounds of anything, anything as long as it wasn't his chewing or panting or moans.

It was revolting really, he usually ate like a pig, but right now he felt like one too, the salad, tomato, his shirt was a god awful mess, not to say anything about his erection. He didn't want to look, but he had to take a peek, almost to make sure that he hadn't ruined his cookie. [Fondly he remembered the one time he'd used a dough- oh but that was something else]

"come on..come on.." He licked his fingertips clean, gripping himself and vigorously started to rub, the sauce making it easier for him to move his hands. He was thinking about nothing, it was lust in its purest form, nothing would get him to start now that he had felt the warm bread against his fingers, the meat on his tongue. Absolutely nothing was going to stop him from bringing himself to the brink and back over and over again until he finally let himself go, and when he did it would feel great, it would feel better than sex, because for some reason this was how it worked now, but god "IIloveyoufuckohgod!" He hissed, bucking in the seat before climaxing.

He wasn't even sure when, because he continued to move his hands long afterwards. He was completely drained of energy, his sweaty face slumping on the steering wheel causing the horn to go off.

"fuck..."

At least he was done for now, he felt content with knowing that.

"It's the five five five deal! now.."

Alfred paled, his hands twitching towards his keys..

No.

Oh god.