Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts.
Hey everyone =D This is a crack-tastic oneshot with kind of a weird inspiration. I'll tell you at the end; if I tell you now, I'll give the whole thing away and that's never fun =P Enjoy!
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Xaldin dropped into his office chair with a huff. He swiveled around to face his desk. A mountain of papers, pens, and empty Styrofoam cups with coffee stains on the insides greeted him. The Lancer ran his right hand through his wild hair, still wet from the shower. He had a report to get to Saïx by tomorrow. Though the mess might not have shown it, he was actually pretty close to being done. There was just a lot of material to sift through. It didn't help that his assigned missions had been a lot more difficult than usual lately. When he RTCed at night he was often too exhausted to make much progress. Todays' mission had been no exception; he could hardly stay awake during his post-mission shower. Even now his eyelids wanted to close. He could just crawl into bed and sleep for a straight week…
But this needs to be done, he told himself firmly, rolling the chair closer to the desk.
For about an hour, Xaldin steadily applied himself to his work. His room was silent except for the shuffling of papers and the scratch of his pen. He didn't bother with coffee tonight since he was so close to finishing. He woke up a bit once he got going, anyway. Though he was physically tired, Xaldin enjoyed the mental exercise.
Finally, Xaldin laid down his pen. He reached his muscular arms above his head and stretched, leaning backwards over the back of the chair until his back cracked. He groaned with pleasure and leaned forward over his desk again. The actual writing was done, but now he wanted to read through it again and correct any mistakes before going to bed. Xaldin never turned in a half-assed report.
The bedroom door opened as Xaldin flipped a page. He didn't notice when Luxord poked his head through the crack in the door. The blonde looked around and spotted his quarry bent over his desk. Sky blue eyes roamed over Xaldins' broad, bare shoulders, the old grey sweatpants he slept in, and his long hair. A grin spread over the Gamblers' face as he stepped into the room and closed the door most of the way behind him.
"Evening, Xaldin," Luxord said lightly, crossing over to the desk.
"Ever hear of knocking?" Xaldin asked irritably, not looking up from his papers.
"I thought it'd be more fun to surprise you," Luxord purred, draping his arms over those shoulders. Xaldins' wet hair tickled Luxords' bare chest as he pressed against him. His hands ran down the Lancers' well-toned body: from shoulders to pectorals to abs, lightly brushing the waistband of his sweatpants, then tracing back up to wrap lightly around his neck. Blonde goatee stubble mingled with black sideburns as Luxord brushed his cheek against Xaldins'.
"Luxord, I'm trying to finish this," Xaldins' voice was gruff and cold, but he was trying not to think about how if he turned his head right now, he could devour the blondes' lips.
"You look pretty done to me," Luxord remarked, glancing at the desk. It was now organized and uncluttered. Papers were sorted according to subject, pens were back in their holder, and the cups were stacked off to one side waiting to be thrown out. Luxord knew that Xaldins' desk was clean like this only when his reports were first started and almost finished.
"Come on," he implored, starting to massage Xaldins' shoulders, "You've been working too hard. You need to relax."
Try as he might, Xaldin just could not concentrate on the words in front of him with Luxords' warm hands kneading his skin. After a moment, the pen once again slipped from his fingers and clattered onto the desk. He leaned his head back against Luxords' abs with his eyes closed and sighed. I could fall asleep right here.
In fact, that's almost what he did. The sweet black relief of sleep had almost swallowed him when Luxord starting running his fingers through Xaldins' hair. This was nothing unusual; Luxord often did this while having sex or cuddling. The Lancer found it relaxed him further as sleep finally pulled him under.
Suddenly, a sharp tug on his hair jolted him awake. He flinched as the pain of a hundred needles radiated through his scalp. Whipping the chair around, Xaldin glared up at Luxord with violent violet eyes. "That hurt," he growled as he reached a hand up to the injured area.
"I'm sorry," Luxord said, his hands for some reason concealed behind his back.
Xaldin only grunted in reply, massaging the back of his head and resenting how adorable Luxord looked in nothing but those deep green and white spade patterned pajamas and that guilty look on his face. Then his fingers brushed against something that didn't feel like hair. He frowned and felt the spot again. Definitely not hair. It was too silky and smooth. Xaldin tugged and it came loose. He brought his and around to his face and his eyes widened in horror. Pinched between his forefinger and thumb was a bright orange ribbon.
"What the hell!" He exploded.
"I thought it would go nice with your hair," Luxord said sheepishly, shuffling his feet on the white carpet.
"With my – what are you talking about?" Xaldin sputtered.
"I wanted to put bows in your hair," explained the Gambler, presenting his hands. He opened his fists to reveal a handful of different-colored ribbons to the irate Lancer, "I – I thought it would look nice. Please, may I continue?"
Usually Luxords' impeccable British manners would have a melting effect on Xaldin, but certainly not now. He let the ribbon go, watching Luxord follow its' curling fall. "Stupid is what it looks like. No." He turned his back on Luxord to attempt to finish the report.
"Xaldin, please? Come on, I hardly have any hair to play with!" Luxord complained. Xaldin grit his teeth and gripped his pen tighter. No way was he going to let Luxord put ribbons in his hair. It was too, too… un-masculine.
"Please, Xaldin? This is just a one-time thing, I swear!" Xaldin couldn't stand the pleading tone in Luxords' voice. He wheeled the chair around again, intending to send him from the room once and for all. But the moment he looked into those sad blue eyes, he regretted it. He sighed.
"A one-time thing." It wasn't a question.
"I swear." Luxords' eyes brightened a bit.
Xaldin sighed again and nodded. He turned the chair so his back was once again to Luxord. He closed his eyes as Luxord resumed his beauty routine. What was one time? Besides, no one would know.
As if on cue, the door slammed open. Horrified, both the Lancer and Gambler spun around. A very bemused Helexkant stood in the entryway. Her waist-length purple hair was also damp from the shower and she was dressed for bed in a pair of gray and pink Hello Kitty pajamas. For a moment, they all stared awkwardly at each other.
"Err… am I interrupting anything? A makeover, maybe?" She smirked.
Before the guys could reply, another Organization member appeared behind Helexkant. Demyx took one look at his superiors and shrieked, "We're doing Xaldins' hair?" before rushing into the room to help.
"Look at him, he's blushing like a bride," Helexkant observed coolly, almost closing the door behind her.
A few minutes later, Marluxia, Zexion, and Lexaeus were walking down the hall to bed together. They heard the laughter from Xaldins' room and noticed the door was open a crack. They peeked in and got quite a show. Luxord and Demyx were fluttering excitedly around Xaldin, who was sitting in his office chair with a set jaw. Many different colored bows decorated his unruly hair. Helexkant stood nearest to the door. Her back to it, shaking with laughter. The trio at the door withdrew and stood for a moment staring at each other.
"What was -," Zexion began.
"That was-," Marluxia started at the same time.
"I don't think we want to know." The Silent Hero stated, ever the practical one.
The Assassin and Schemer nodded in agreement, and they all dispersed to their own rooms and troubled dreams.
...
I TRICKED ALL YOUR ASSES WITH MY SERIOUS BEGINNING, LMFAO.
Anyway, my inspiration for this came from my phone. Yes. I got a new phone and took a picture off my computer screen of Xaldin for my background picture. There's a light right behind my computer, and it was on when I took it, you can see it in the picture. The reflected light is right over the back of Xaldins' head, and it turns a part of his hair orange and it looks like he's wearing a big bow. No joke.
Oh, Helexkant is my Nobody. I may or may not write a fic that will properly introduce her later, but it will most likely just be a series of smut. Awwyisss. I also really do have a pair of Hello Kitty pajamas. They're a summer pair though so I can't wear them now ;_; I don't like winter. True story.
ANYWAY, this A/N is getting way too long. Thanks for reading, reviews are greatly appreciated, and I will catch you all later!