Drowning in a World of Chocolate Cupcakes

Ever since she was a little girl Izzie Stevens had baked chocolate cupcakes when she was upset; her mother had taught her how to do so. She didn't know why she did it, but it was better than Meredith's everlasting one-night-stands or tequila shots. A lot healthier too, and besides, chocolate made anyone feel good. Chocolate was a very powerful medicine of the soul, but tonight, it wouldn't work for Izzie. It was simply the fact that she was doing something, anything, that stopped her from drowning in a world of misery. She'd gone on a date with Alex tonight, and the prospect had been very positive. He'd given her all the possible hints earlier about liking her, she was so sure he'd been sincere. Though once their date had really started he'd acted as a total jerk again, making her feel like she'd done her hair, make-up, and waxed her legs all for nothing. He hadn't even kissed her! Izzie hadn't felt so humiliated in a long time. Why did he put all this effort in making her feel so bad? The answer could be very simple; Alex was a jerk. And Izzie, according to herself, was an idiot. It was obvious that he was so wrong, and she could have so much better, but why did he make her feel the way he did when they were around? And why, during these moments, was it like they 'both' felt it? It was all too complicated for Izzie, it made her head all full. Too full to be able to think of other things like work tomorrow, which is why she baked. It was supposed to be a distraction, and it was. For George and Meredith it was also a treat.

"Hey Izzie", Meredith greeted her as she entered the house, coming home from working a late shift.

"Hey…", Izzie distantly replied, not really having eye for anything but the cupcakes she just made, and the ones that were still in process.

"You're baking. Smells good, but what's wrong?" Meredith inquired, aware of the reason behind Izzie's baking usually not being cravings. She'd seen her friend bake a few times now, and it had always been after something sad happened, or when she was angry or upset with someone.

"Nothing's wrong. Not with me, anyway. It's that jerk who's wrong", Izzie replied, getting angry again at the thought of Alex and how he treated her. She was a person! Not some toy he could flirt with whenever he felt like it, but a real actual person!

"What did he do now?" Meredith took the cupcake Izzie handed to her and took a bite out of it. It tasted surprisingly good. The funny thing about Izzie's baking was that the more upset she was, the better her pastries tasted. "These are yummie", she added.

"Thanks. And we went out. On a date. Or what was supposed to be a date".

"What happened?"

"Nothing happened, not even a kiss. You know Meredith, I really thought we had a connection! He gave me all these signals; we flirted, and shared laughs and stuff… I just… Never mind it, he's an asshole", Izzie said, still glaring at the cupcake as if it could do anything about the way she felt.

"Aren't all men?" Meredith agreed, finishing eating the last bit of the tasty cupcake. She was thinking of her own issues with Derek. Honestly, she wondered if there was just one good guy out there who wouldn't hurt a girl's feelings, wouldn't act jerky, and would actually be reliable, so not let the girl in question think he's single and have his wife show up. They probably didn't exist, and if they did, they were gay. That would explain why they didn't have a wife.

"Probably… So what's up with you?" Izzie asked, noticing Meredith's sad look.

"Nothing, either. Nothing new. You know Izzie, I really envy you. You can heal your pain by baking cupcakes, I need to get indecently drunk first and take random strangers into my bedroom. Really not so cool".

Izzie smiled softly, it was true, but Meredith was being just slightly superficial here. She couldn't cure her pain by it, just simply take the attention to it away, a little. For a while. That was probably what Meredith did with her tequila and one-night-stands too, distract herself. Well, whatever gets you through today, Izzie thought. "Yea… So are you going out tonight?"

Meredith nodded. "Yea, going to Joe's. See if I can deal with my issues there.".

"Are you sure? You can also have another cupcake."

"I'm sure, but thanks. Good luck Izz.", Meredith smiled as she got up and put her coat back on.

"You too Mer.", Izzie replied. She took the freshly finished cupcakes out of the oven and started on the next ones, she wasn't nearly finished yet. She watched Meredith leave and smiled at her pastries. Tequila may taste really good sometimes, eventually it would cause some sort of damage. And if the tequila didn't the one-night-stands would. One way or another. Seriously, thinking of that Izzie was happy to drown in her own little world of chocolate cupcakes.

---the End---