CHAPTER 1: WHEN IT ALL BEGAN
Hey guys, this is just a little AN because i wanted to warn you before you read it that this has some self harm and bullying in it. If you are easily triggered by that kind of stuff please do not read this. This is sad but, I will be posting more stories I just wanted to post a sad one. Thank you for reading and if you have any comments feel free to tell me just don't be too mean. I do not own Soul Eater or any of it's Characters.
It was the end of a long school day and all Maka wanted to do was go home and relax. She had stayed late after school so she could get some extra credit points with Stein and as she was exiting the seemingly empty campus she heard her name. She was curious as to what they were saying so she got closer so they could not see her but, still close enough that she could hear them.
"Oh yeah! She is super annoying getting straight A's all the time" the blonde one with hair down to her knees said.
"Maka isn't just annoying she is so ugly and has no body at all. She is basically a board with pigtails." The one with short bright blue hair said as she and the other started to laugh. Maka walked away and ran all the way home, dodging people and buildings. Tears started to roll down her cheeks as she unlocked the door of her and Soul's shared apartment. She walked in took off her shoes and went to her room. Locking the door as she laid on her bed thinking about what the girls were saying.
'Am I annoying and have no body?' she thinks to herself. After a while of thinking she unlocks her bedroom door and walks to the bathroom not noticing Soul. She locks the door and turns on the shower.
'I'm fine. They were just dumb girls that wanted to pick on someone that is better than them' she thinks to herself. After she is done washing her hair she turns off the shower and wraps herself in a towel. She unlocks the door and walks out to go to her room. She enters her room and gets dressed. After she gets dressed she leaves her room to go say hi to Soul. First she goes to the kitchen and realized that it was her night to cook.
"Shit! It is already 6:00 o'clock and i haven't started it yet" She says and Soul hears her and walks to the kitchen from the living room and asks
" What's wrong Maka?".
"Nothing I just forgot to start dinner" She says and smiles at him. He laughs and says
"So I forgot maybe two times and now you forgot. Now you can't say anything" he laughs and looks at her "But i guess that i will help you just this once". He goes to the fridge and gets out the stuff to make breakfast.(i feel like maka would like breakfast for dinner) he starts to get the pans and stuff out and Maka starts to make eggs. After they made and ate dinner they cleaned the kitchen and Soul decided to shower.
"Hey Maka i'm gonna go take a shower" he says and goes towards the bathroom
"I'm gonna go to bed" Maka says and goes to her room. She goes to sleep.
THE NEXT DAY
Maka woke up to her alarm and walked to the kitchen to make herself a smoothy and to put her hair in her normal pigtails. She got the blender out and started to make the smoothy when she heard Soul's door open and him walk into the bathroom.
'Why is he up this early?' she asks herself. She hear's the shower turn on and realizes that he only took showers in the morning when he had a really bad headache. She stops and grabs some ibuprofen and some water and walks to the door and softly knocks on the door.
"Hey Soul? You ok? I have some ibuprofen for you" She asks through the door.
"Can you bring it in? You can't see me because the light is off" He asks and she opens the door and finds the counter and sets the bottle and water on the counter and left. She went back to the kitchen and started to drink the smoothie. After a while and the shower still being on she figured that Soul was not going to school and left. She walked to the DWMA and walked up the never ending stairs. When she got up the stairs she saw the two girls from the day prior and walked faster past them and heard them laughing at her from behind her. She went to her class and went to her seat next to Tsubaki.
She smiled at Tsubaki and said "Hello, how are you today?".
"I'm ok. Black Star kept me up all night trying to study with him, I wish i could help him more. He is so stubborn sometimes" She says and Maka nodded as Stein walked in to start class.
" Maka why is Soul not with you today?" he asked as he was taking attendance. "He has a really bad headache and decided not to come today" She says to him and she hears a few girls giggle behind her and say
"it is probably from her". Maka looks behind her and sees a purple haired girl and a short haired blonde girl giggling to themselves. She huffs and pays attention to Stein. After the day ends she starts to pack her stuff up and drops a folder and bends down to get it. The door to the class room opens and she hears someone walk to a seat above her. The person goes to her seat and grabs something they left behind and Maka began to walk out and so did this girl that sat behind her. She was taller than maka and had hair that went down to her waist that was purple. Maka holds the door open for her and she quietly thanks Maka and walks to her blonde friend while snickering.
"She really is flat chested. There isn't anything there at all." she whispers just loud enough that Maka could still hear. Maka tried not to cry and she walked out of the large building and walked down the many stairs of the DWMA while thinking.
'Should i start dressing differently or something?' she asks herself. She shrugs and when she gets to the bottom of the stairs starts to walk home to her apartment. When she gets there the door is unlocked so she goes in, takes off her boots, sets them by the door, and goes to her room to change into her house clothes which consisted of grey short shorts and one of Soul's shirts that he let her have to sleep in. She then goes to his room to check on him and give him the work he missed from Stein's class. She knocks on the door and says
"Soul, how are you feeling? I brought you the work you missed from today and I will help you go over it." she waits for a response.
"Sure you can come in. Just don't turn on the light yet" he says and she quietly opens the door and quickly shuts it so the light won't bother Souls migraine.
"Thank you Maka" Soul says. His voice coming from his bed. She walks over to his bed and feels around for a spot to sit. Soul moves a bit and she sits on the bed.
"Do you want a head rub to make it feel better?" She asks "And some ibuprofen?".
"I will take the head rub please" he says and moves so his head is laying in her lap.
"Did you sleep at all today?" she asks him and begins to rub the top of his head near his forehead.
"No my head has been pounding and I can't get it to stop." he says and relaxes. She runs her fingers through his thick hair and rubs his scalp. After about thirty minutes of this he finally falls asleep. Since he is still on her lap she did not want to move him because he may wake up so she just laid back carefully and grabbed one of his pillows to put under her head and slowly drifted to sleep. A few hours later it was eight O'Clock and Soul woke up. He sits up slowly and sighs because his headache had gone away and noticed that Maka laid asleep on his bed. He didn't want to disturb her sleep so he moved her body carefully and laid her on the bed vertically instead of horizontally. He pulled the comforter over her as he did he noticed the way her hair was splayed onto the pillow and the way her face looked while she was facing made her look like an angel. He smiles at this and lays next to her and sets an alarm for five the next morning when she normally wakes up.
THe NExt Day
She woke up to a different alarm sound than hers and opened her eyes noticing this was not her room, this was Soul's room.
'Did I fall asleep in here last night?' she asked herself as she noticed a warm arm around her. She sighs and turns to look at his face. He was so peaceful while he slept. She pokes his nose and says
"Soul it is time to wake up and go to school" his eyes flutter open and she smiles at him. He looks at her and groans,
"Five more minutes" he says his voice cracking slightly as he closes his eyes.
"No five more minutes I let you sleep till Five Thirty. It's time to wake up because you are driving us to school on your bike." She says and crawls over him and pulls him off the bed. While he is saying something about the value of sleep she leaves and goes to her room. 'Ill try to wear something different today. And makeup and new hair' she thinks to herself as she picks out some black highwaisted shorts that showed off her legs and a yellow crop top that ended just below her breasts. (She decided to throw in a triple padded bra with this). She smiled at herself in the mirror, plugged in her curling iron, then decided to do her makeup while it was heating up. She did simple cat winged eyeliner and red lipstick. Then curled the bottoms of her hair and put it up in a pony tail. She put on some black flats and walked out of her room. Soul was in the kitchen putting on his shoes and she walked in and sat in the seat next to him while she waited for him.
"Good morning Soul" She says sweetly and Soul sits up to talk to her when he notices all the differences.
"Do you have a boyfriend?" he asks.
"NO why would you ask that? I would tell you if i did" She says a little aggravated.
" Then what's with all the makeup and new clothes and hairdo?" He asks and touches her hair. She smacks his hand and says
"I just wanted to change a little ok." she gets up and goes to the living room in a huff. He shrugs and follows her.
"Wanna go now?" he asks and grabs two helmets and his keys. She nods and follows him out the door to his orange bike. He hands her the helmet and she frowns.
"Don't argue just put it on" he says and gets on. She gets on behind him and wraps her arms around his torso. He starts the bike and starts to head towards the DWMA. Once they get there he parks the bike and they walk up the neverending stairs together talking about what he had missed the day prior. They eventually get to class and as soon as they walk in the bell rings and they quickly get to their seats, Maka sitting by Tsubaki with Blackstar sitting next to her and Soul next to him.
"I like the new look Maka" Tsubaki says with a smile and then they hear the familiar sound of Stein's rolling chair. After he falls on his head and gets back in the seat, he starts the lesson off with Soul energy. By lunch time he had already thrown 3 scalpels at Black Star and Maka was still feeling pretty confident in her new outfit of choice. The bell rang for lunch and Tsubaki was yelling at Blackstar to wake up. Maka figured this was going to take a while and said
"Hey Tsubaki i'll meet you guys in their im going to go". Tsubaki waves to her and Maka walks to the door of the classroom, takes a deep breath and walks out. She walks to the lunch room and gets in line for the food. While in there she got a lot of stairs from a lot of people. She did not know if these were good or bad stares and felt very uncomfortable. She got out of line and decided to go to the bathroom to calm herself down. She walked to the bathroom and started to examine herself in the mirror. She hears footprints and decides to go into a stall to wait until they left to continue looking at herself in the mirror. She looks through the small holes by the hinge of the door of the stall to see who was coming in. It was the two girls from her class and the other two that she hadn't met that had made fun of her. She keeps quiet and decides to listen to their conversation. They all look in the mirror and start to reapply their make up.
"Did anyone see Maka today trying to look hot. I almost wanted to gag. Her makeup was trashy and her outfit was slutty. Soul also looked tired, he is probably tired of her. I hear she hits him in the head with books all the time. No wonder he has headaches. He should leave her and find a different Meister. Maybe she is trying to keep him by looking slutty to please him? Haha, NO one is going to ever be satisfied by her body" They all start to laugh and go on about how ugly and slutty she was. Maka waited until they left and let out a sob and cried. As the tears went down her face she noticed that her mascara was probably running down her cheeks and left the stall to wipe it up. She noticed a brush on the counter and figured one of the other girls left it. She continued trying to get the makeup off of her cheeks and from around her eyes when someone opened the door and looked at her. It was the purple haired girl, she walked to the counter and grabbed the brush. She let out a little snicker and said
"Did he finally find someone better than you?" Maka did not get to speak back to her before she left the bathroom. Maka could hear some faint giggling outside the door. She gave up on makeup and decided to take it all off. She even took down her hair and let it stay down. She left the bathroom and went back to the lunch room. She saw Blackstar's hair and walked to the table where Death the Kid, Liz, Patty, Tsubaki, Black Star, and Soul sat. She sat next to Tsubaki.
"Where were you? I thought that we were supposed to meet you not the other way around" Tsubaki asked jokingly.
"I went to the library for a second and then just went to the bathroom to take off the makeup and let down my hair" she says and smiles at Tsubaki.
"Oh, why did you take it off? It was cute" she says and looks at Maka.
"Because it was coming off anyway and i didn't bring any more to reapply it." She says, she feels bad for lying but, didn't want to tell Tsubaki the truth about what really happened. She looks over at Soul who is talking to Kid and Blackstar.
"Hey Soul, is your headache any better from yesterday?" She asks looking happy to see Soul.
"Yeah" He says curtly not looking at her.
'Soul isn't much for words but, he never just says yeah and not look at me. Maybe he is mad that i woke him up or that i slept in his bed. Or he doesn't want to look at me because i am ugly.' she thinks and stares into space until the bell rings and she gets up to walk to class not waiting for any of her friends. She is the first one in class and sits in her seat. She pulls out a book and starts to read, a few minutes later the rest of the class starts to file into the classroom to get into their seats. Maka puts her book away and gets out her books and pencil. The rest of the day went by and the final bell rings, she starts to put her things away and notices Soul waiting for her to finish.
"You can go without me, I am going to stay and ask Stein some questions on the material we learned today" She says happily. Soul just nods and leaves the room. Her smile falls off her face and she sighs. She continues to put her stuff away. When she knows that Soul is probably home, she gets up and starts to walk out of the building on her way home. As she is walking down the stairs she sees the group of girls that have been targeting her lately and she rushes down the stairs. She walks faster and takes a different way home. When she finally gets home she doesn't see Soul's bike and takes out her house key to open the door. She goes inside, takes off her shoes, goes to her room and grabs some clothes. She walks to the bathroom and starts the shower. She takes a shower and gets out and gets dressed. After she gets dressed she goes out to the living room and expects Soul to be there watching TV or playing a videogame but, she turns the corner and doesn't see him.
'He isn't home' she thinks to herself and goes to her room to lay in bed. She goes under the covers and stares at her ceiling.
'He is probably just out with BlackStar and will be back later. Or, maybe he doesn't want to be near me right now. I don't know what i did wrong to make him hate me too. Maybe those girls talked to him.' she thinks and tears fill her eyes. She lets out a sob and curls into a ball. She cries for what seems like hours until she hears the front door open. She knows it is Soul and pretends to sleep with the blankets over her face trying to make sure he doesn't see her crying or awake. He walks into the living room and then goes to her room and knocks.
"Maka i am home" he says. "You awake?" he figures she is asleep when he doesn't get an answer. She then takes the blankets off of her face and lays flat on her back. Letting the tears fall onto her pillow as she stares at her ceiling.
'i'm so ugly. Why do i try. No matter what i do i'm not good enough. I failed soul by not making him a death scythe. I bet he hates me and doesn't want to hurt my feelings so he isn't telling me he wants a new partner. I am not the great meister my mama once was. I am as bad as my papa. Those girls have to hate me for a reason. I'm a bad person.' she thinks all night until she hears her alarm go off. She shuts it off and goes out into the kitchen. She decides that she isn't hungry and goes to the bathroom. Her face has tear stains so she puts on some foundation, eyeliner, concealer, and lip gloss. She leaves the bathroom and writes Soul a note.
"I left for school so don't worry that i am still in my room. I'll see you at school" she leaves it on the coffee table in the living room and goes to her room. She puts on a short blue skirt and a black low cut tank top. She puts on her boots and starts to walk to school. She is very early so she sits outside the door of her class till Stein lets her in. She sits in her normal seat and reads a book. About twenty minutes later the bell for class rings and she puts the book away so she can get out her class work. When everyone files into the room and the final bell rings Stein comes in.
"Good morning maka" Tsubaki says and Maka says
"Hi" and looks down at her work. A few hours later the lunch bell rings and maka says "I'll meet you guys there" and leaves. She goes to the cafeteria and pulls out her phone and earbuds and listens to some music. She gets her book and reads while she waits for her friends to get to the table. Tsubaki, Black Star, and Soul show up first. She continues to read while they put their stuff down.
"Hey Maka are you ok today?" Tsubaki asks her.
"Yeah i'm just a bit tired is all" Maka says and smiles at her.
"Ok, let me know if you need anything" Tsubaki says and the three go to get lunch while maka watches the table. Later The rest of the gang shows up and the table is loud. Maka continues to read and listen to music. When the bell rings she gets up and quickly goes back to class.
"She is still being a total slut today, her skirt is so short. In fact her normal skirt is short too. I bet she is just trying to get someone to fuck her" the blonde one says as she walks into the room and sets her stuff down
"There is the hussy now" one of them says and they all laugh.
"So Maka, why are you all alone? Did you lose all your friends because you are so boring and did you lose Soul because you are the worst meister on the planet. OH and i heard that you're hooking, great for you but, i don't think you will get much money most men actually like to look at breasts not a board" They all laugh and Maka ignores them and tears run down her face.
'They think i am a hooker? They think i am the worst meister?' she thinks and puts her head down. They stop laughing and everyone walks in. Maka was done with today and before the bell rang she gets up and walks out. She can hear them giggling as she walks out. She practically runs all the way home, she gets to her apartment and unlocks her door. When she gets in she goes to her room locks the door and starts to blast music. She lets out a loud scream and cries on her floor. After a little while she goes to her bathroom and looks at herself in the mirror. She pokes around at her face and washes all of the makeup off of her face.
'Without makeup i look like a child' she opens the drawer and pulls out her starts to dismember it and puts the sharpest blade to her arm.
'if i'm going to do this is should do it where people won't notice it'.She pulls up her skirt and presses the blade to her creamy white skin. She swiftly moves it across her flesh and a blood drips from her thigh.
'i'm so weak that I can't even make a deeper cut' she thought. She decide to give another go and this time she won't hold back. As she placed it against her thigh she plunged it in her she and dragged it very slowly and this time what can out was a beautiful crimson blood gushed out her leg she tried to clean it quickly. Maka finally got it to stop bleeding and wrapped it up and called it a day. She quickly hid the razor and threw away the blood stained paper towel in the trash can in her room. She stays in there the rest of the night, around eleven O'clock she hears Soul come in and waits for him to knock on the door to say hi. Soul just goes to his room and shuts the door. Maka sighs and decides that she should probably get some sleep. However every time she would try to go to sleep her mind would make her think about how everyone hated her. 'Everyone hates me and I don't know why. Is being ugly really a reason to hate someone?' she thinks to herself.
She stays up all night and in the morning gets ready for school. She is wearing sweatpants and a baggy sweatshirt. 'At least i'm not a slut today' she thinks and skips breakfast. She goes to the living room and puts on her shoes. She decides to not wait for Soul and walk to school again, she was starting to enjoy solitude because then no one could say anything negative to her if she was alone. She goes to the school climbs up the neverending steps and walks to Stein's class to set all of her things down. After getting situated she starts to read a new novel she ordered off of Amazon. Then about ten minutes after she started the novel the bell rings and everyone walks in.
"Good morning class it is Friday so, don't zone out yet" Stein says and then continues his lesson on dissection that everyone has heard about a million times. Maka feels sleepy and starts to doze off until she feels a sharp pain on her left ear and hears a *DOING* sound that the scalpel makes when it enters wood. She feels the blood trickle down her face and she says
"Sorry i'll try to stay awake". Tsubaki looks at Maka and immediately looks worried.
"Maka you are bleeding let's get you to the nurse" she says and stands up to get Maka there. Since Maka has been super stressed out lately she hasn't noticed she hasn't been eating so when she stands up too fast she faints.
"Oh my Death Maka are you alright" Tsubaki says as she picks Maka up and takes her to the nurse. After a few hours Maka wakes up and Tsubaki is sitting in the chair next to her.
"Why am I at the nurse?" She asks and sits up. Tsubaki sits up quickly and looks at Maka.
"The Nurse said you had very low blood sugar and that it looks like you haven't been eating. She also fixed your ear up" Tsubaki says and looks at the pale sleepy Maka.
"The Nurse said as soon as you woke up someone was supposed to take you home. I asked Soul to but, I guess he didn't want to leave school because he missed a day earlier this week so I am going to take you home in my car" She says and smiles at her. "So let's get you walking and get you home"
"Thank you Tsubaki" Maka says as she stands and they start to walk out of the nurse's office. "Hey Tsubaki I have to use the restroom, wait here I will be right back" She says and Tsubaki nods in response as Maka walks down the hallway to the bathroom. She walks in and sees the Purple and blonde haired girls.
"Oh looks like I found the weakling that can't stand the sight of blood" The blonde one says as she exits the bathroom. Maka uses the bathroom and leaves as well, as she is exiting she didn't not notice the two girls waiting on the wall next to the door of the bathroom. So when she walked past them one of them tripped her. She landed face first onto her nose and sat up holding it.
"That was mean Kimi-Chan" The Blonde one says to the girl called Kimi.
"You know you wanted to do it Nashi" Kimi says to her blonde friend Nashi. Maka just groans and gets up and walks back to Tsubaki. Her nose was hurting and all she wanted to do was go home. They walk to the parking lot together and then drive to Maka and Soul's place.
"Do you need me to stay here with you? Or can I go back to school?" Tsubaki asks Maka as she gets out.
"I'm going to be fine, go back to school and i'm pretty sure that Soul will bring me my work from today and yesterday." Maka says with a smile. Tsubaki smiles back and rolls the window up and drives back towards the school. Maka walks up to her apartment and unlocks it. She goes to her room and lays down. She manages to fall asleep and wakes up at around nine O'clock when she hears a door slam. She doesn't come out of her room but, gets up out of bed to stretch. She hears Soul's footsteps down the hallway and then she hears them right outside her door. She waits for him to knock but, he doesn't he just walks into her room.
"What the Hell Soul?" She Yells and looks at him. He is having a hard time standing.
"Do You know what i have had to deal with this week?" he asks and slurs his words as he speaks. " Do you know how many people have told me this week that you are some kind of hooker or something. That you are a bitch. That you are too weak for me." he spits out. She looks at him speechless. "You may have a flat chest and no one may like you now but, someone might in the future. So stop looking like a slut to attract someone it isn't good for our reputation" He says and gets slightly closer to her. She can't believe what she is hearing.
"You're drunk Soul. Go to bed" She says backing away from him.
"I will do what I want to when i want to. YOu know this week has taught me that you are also really annoying and and just i can't be near you as much" He says sloppily and Maka's eyes fill up with tears.
"Soul get out of my room now." She yells and tries to push him out and that just makes him fall.
"You always have to find some way of hurting me huh" he says
"Soul SHUT UP and GET OUT OF MY ROOM" She screams at him. He crawls out and she slams her door shut and locks it. She puts her back against the door and slides down to the floor as she cries.
' I knew Soul Hated me. He is a jerk, why was he drunk? He isn't even old enough for that shit' she thinks to herself as she puts her head in her hands. After a while she gets up and unlocks her door so she can leave and go to the bathroom and wash her face off from the tears. She looks around to see if Soul is out there. He isn't so she walks quietly to the bathroom and locks the door. She turns on the sink and splashes her face with cold water. She doesn't look up because she doesn't want to look in the mirror at herself. She begins to open the drawer and pull out her best friend, her razor. She takes off her shirt and looks at the shoulder.
'no more short sleeves for me'. She begins to make three straight lines each the same length and bleed in unison. As she stands there she looks at the mirror but to look at herself but her cuts instead she looks and the blood running down her arm. To her it's one of the most beautiful sights shes seen. It washes away her stress,depression,anxiety, and so much more. It made her feel refreshed, oh so refreshed, almost like she could become a whole new person but, in the end it will only cause more trouble and grow into more pain. She dresses her wound like she has many times before when she has been hurt in battle. These wounds were self inflicted but, it was still a battle, a battle against herself. She cleans up and puts her shirt back on, opens the bathroom door and hears Soul snoring. She sneaks back to her room and throws the paper towels away in her trash then goes to bed.
End of chapter 1. Let me know how you like it in the comments. Thank you for reading and I promise it won't be sad forever.