I still don't own Negima. But I can have all sorts of fun with the characters from Negima.

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Hitting Where it Hurts

Ako stood on the ridge above the beach where everyone was, dressed in a darker form of her Pactio clothes. Black nurse's uniform and hat, complete with dark brown tights and black nurses shoes. To her left stood Chizuru, wearing a grey blouse and skirt, a black apron, with thigh high dark brown stockings and black slippers completing the ensemble.

Both of them held their artifacts in a way that indicated they were fully prepared to use them as they leered at the girls below, giving off vibes of dark sexuality and evil intent.

Behind and above them hovered Evangeline, cackling triumphantly. "Bwahaha! My newest minions will make short work of all of you! Behold what they have already done to your friends!" Evangeline gestured and the Library Trio stepped from the shadows.

There were several gasps as everyone present saw the Library Trio. Yue and Nodoka wore clothing that suggested they robbed a sex fetish shop. But everyone's gaze was focused more on Haruna.

"It's not possible!"

"They didn't!"

"And how is everyone doing? Are you having a pleasant day?" a smiling Haruna asked everyone.

"They've turned Haruna into a Pollyanna!"

It looked that way indeed. Haruna was dressed in a yellow sundress with a white hat and white sandals completing the makeover from perverted mangaka to friendly socialite.

"I hope you're ready to play with my friends. Although they tend to play a little rough," Haruna continued chipperly.

"Bwahaha! Don't worry! I assure you that they will be... gentle," Evangeline grinned, showing her fangs in a sadistic manner.

"Trust the nice nurse when she tells you that this won't hurt." Ako grinned sinisterly at everyone below as she said that.

Chizuru's smile was more beatific but no less frightening, "And you'll feel so much better after you've had a onion..."

"Oh no you don't!"

"Eh?" Everyone turned to look at Haruna again.

Haruna pointed up at Chizuru, "I am not going to just stand here and watch when I can draw tentacle monsters that are more disturbing than you'll ever be, so don't start thinking you are somehow scarier than I am."

"Oh? I think I can handle any tentacle monster you can draw, Paru-san," Chizuru's smile became wider even as she radiated darkness.

As everyone watched Haruna, they saw Nodoka, Yue, and Natsumi appear. Evidently Natsumi had lost her concentration while using her artifact as she shuddered at the thought of an angry Chizuru. The obviously fake sexily-dressed Nodoka and Yue glanced at each other as if asking, "Well, now what?"

Evangeline facepalmed.

"Oh really Naba-san?" Haruna reached into her bra and drew out her Pactio card, "Adeat!"

Chizuru frowned before charging at Haruna.

After the scuffle had died down and was declared a draw by those that stayed to watch, everyone broke out the picnic tables and cookout equipment. As Satsuki cooked, most everyone gathered around one of the tables and discussed matters, even as Chizuru and Haruna continued their own discussion off in the distance.

"Why do we have as many people as we do obsessed with... that?" Asuna asked while gesturing to indicate her meaning, as well as her unwillingness to say the actual word.

"I believe that number falls within the statistical probability..." Satomi started to say but was cut off.

"Chizuru has always believed in those onions," Ayaka said, weariness evident in her tone. Natsumi could only nod in agreement.

"And I have always believed that getting a shot... um, there, made you get better faster," Ako said while blushing. "It's a shame we didn't have that spar work out. Chachamaru's sisters worked hard on my inverse Pactio costume."

"It looked very nice Ako," Akira said.

"Very nice," Yuna nodded.

"Still creepy though," Kazumi said. Sayo nodded her agreement from behind her. After a second, Kazumi added, "No offense Ako. I'm not talking about the costume, but about..."

"None taken," the increasingly embarrassed Ako cut Kazumi off before she could finish the thought.

"Still, some of our artifacts are unusual in nature," Yue said.

"Well, does anyone really understand how a Pactio works?" asked Yuna.

"All I know is that it gives you an artifact based on your beliefs..." Asuna started.

"And we believe that now we have you!"

Everyone turned to see Chizuru and Haruna, artifacts at the ready.

"No food if you fight," came the quiet voice of Satsuki.

That made them pause. Haruna slumped in defeat, "You know how to hit someone where it hurts."

"And you don't Paru?" Nodoka asked.

"I still think me, Chizuru, and Ako should be called the An..."

"NO!" everyone shouted.

Nimrod Notes

I know what you're thinking. "Where is Negi and Kotaro while this is happening?"

Possible explanation 1: Kotaro grabbed Negi and ran as fast as he could go once he saw Chizuru.

Possible explanation 2: Can't the girls have a day in Evangeline's Resort to themselves?

Either way, does anyone want Negi exposed to anything of that nature at that age?