It wasn't so much so that she had been right, he had been wrong, no. He'd gotten used to that pretty quick. Mind readin' genius… girlfriend (word still bugged him), ya know, she had a tendency to be right about shit. That weren't it.
An' also, it wasn't like he was the big macho asshole that everyone thought he was. Granted, the rumor had a bit of merit and it was based on mostly truth about his personality, but on the whole, he wasn't that bad. It was never, ever, a sense of male pride that prompted his behavior. It was just a general sense of distrust in the 'verse at large. Jayne din' really see a problem with that. Jus' smarts, when ya thought about it. Smarts, that made him so distrustful with womenfolk. Or any folk.
He had boundaries, s'what River had called 'em. Walls that he liked where they were. Weren't not a damn thing wrong with that. He had been content. Yeah, content was a good word. Real satisfied, he was. Not sad, not ecstatic, not overly anything, jus' content. Good word. Riv had gotten him into words since he'd stopped being "content".
She liked it when he'd whisper big words to her, tell her things 'bout herself she already knew with more then two syllables and a Rim accent. (Pulchritudinous. Effulgent. Incandescent. Rapturous. Tantalizing. Fascinating.) She liked that real nice.
That was the thing he was aggravated about, that he was hooked on doing things she liked. Things that made her happy more than they made him happy. She'd said it would happen. Warned him up front. But, like it already got said, that wasn't what was eatin' at him. Maybe he'd thought she was jus' spewin' more crazy. Either way it hadn't stopped him from screwing her against the lockers in the cockpit.
Riv made some awful jokes about that afterward. Cockpit, ha ha. She was a real gorram brat when she wanted to be. Warned him about that too.
Said to him "You don't want to do this, not really."
An' he'd looked at her like she was crazy…er. He'd had her spread for him with her skirt up around her waist pressed into a row of lockers, for crying out loud.
An' he'd said: "Girl, maybe you don' know much about what this part of me being this hard means. Cuz I'm fair sure it means I want this. Been lookin' on you soft like for a while now. Ya jus' said ya felt the same way, what's the hold up here?"
She'd stroked his cheek. He remembered that clearly, because it was the first time she'd touched him that way. So soft. He'd never had a girl touch him that way. The drag of her fingers across his slightly stubbled cheek wasn't at all hindered or inhibited ('nother good word), it was just smooth. And it felt like it was full o' longing.
She grinned and whispered softly. "You don't want to begin this, you like your quiet life alone. Getting involved here means my bratty ways mixed in evenly with the aforementioned quiet life. You don't know what you're getting into. There are situations beyond your ability to see, changes in structure and form. You can't know."
He had shrugged and fidgeted. The prospect of getting inside her at last, after months of being tortured by the very smell and sight of her, was just provin' too attractive. "Don't expect much from me, okay? But… I want this. Cin' we jus' deal with all the other stuff later? I'm ready to pop an' you look like you could do with a good tumble."
Then she gave him that look, with the serious eyes. "I don't expect anything from you Jayne, but there will come a time when you regret that."
At the time, he'd frowned and said "Huh?". River chuckled and kissed his neck sweetly.
"I'm just giving you proper forewarning. We may commence with intercourse now."
"Well alright now!" He'd said, very excited to finally get down to it. They'd both screamed loud enough to wake the dead and Jayne was exceedingly surprised that no one came running. And they went like that for a while. He'd thought that maybe they could just stay that way forever. Spontaneous, unexpected, secretive. Rushed.
It was the rushed part that eventually drove him up a wall. There were only so many times he could take River with all her clothes on before he began to long for her without them. And there was only so much time they could spend sneaking off before either one of them was missed. It was a curiosity thing. The sexin' was so… phenomenal, without time to do it up proper, he had to know what it was like with that time. That thought scared him though. Honest to Buddha scared him.
He didn't like that he was desperate to have her all to himself for an undetermined amount of time. He didn't like that in order for them to have the time he wanted, they'd have to go public. For about two months he held on like that, stubborn, unwilling to take the next step. Looking back on it, he maybe should have realized that just wanting the next step was the start of something.
One day, they were just sitting in the mess. She was reading a cortex feed print out, Mal and Inara were cooking dinner, Simon and Kaylee were making googly eyes at each other, and Zoe had been re-sorting the pantry. Out of nowhere he'd just come out and announced it.
"River and I are kinda seein' each other."
Flew out of his damn mouth 'fore he even knew it. "Not funny." Simon had replied, not looking up.
River's eyes were locked on Jayne's though. Serious eyes again, questioning. "I weren't making a joke, Doc. We're seein' each other."
Mal started chuckling. "Like, in the way that right now, ya two are looking at each other, right? Try not to kill him, Simon, he's just foolin'."
"I aint foolin'. We're sexin', no lie."
Simon and Mal had looked put out. "Really Jayne. It aint funny, stop being so foul about it." The captain had said forcefully.
Jayne rolled his eyes and River actually laughed. Then she got up and sat on his lap and chaos erupted out of nowhere. The next two hours were full of much shouting and much threatening, but in the end, River moved in with him. They got their alone time and more. All the while, he never said a soft gushy word to her. She seemed alright with that, she didn't expect anything from him. That was what he'd signed up for, no expectations. It was almost half a year later that brought him to his current predicament.
They'd been sitting in the bay, whole crew after a game of hoop ball. River sat on his lap and rested her temple against his collar bone. Simon made a sour face but Jayne weren't paying him no mind. The merc had been thinking on the way River's skin tasted after she had a work out. It was just slightly salty, but in faint way you had to strain to realize. Mostly she tasted fresh, and clean, but sweet like cherries. He stroked her soft leg and smelled her apple scented hair and admired the pink flush of her gorgeous skin. He was a lucky son of a bitch, to catch this piece of heaven in his arms. River rubbed her cheek against his shoulder happily.
That made him smile, always actin' like a cat, his girl. When they were alone, she'd purr. River lifted her head sleepily and smiled at him with warm brown eyes.
"Hey…" He said, unaware he was even talking. "You…" And just in time he snapped his mouth shut and looked away. "Never mind." He muttered.
Those were dangerous things she'd gotten bouncing around in his head. And what he'd been about to say was not something Jayne Cobb said. But when he saw the hopeful spark die in her eyes, something in him twinged. She didn't look disappointed, or upset even. She just understood. Because she didn't expect anything from him. And he realized that she was right, he did regret that his girl didn't want nothing more from him.
He felt defiant right then, he'd show her! Jayne grabbed her chin softly and turned it back to face him.
"You make me really, really happy." He grumbled softly.
River had never cried so hard in her life as she did when Jayne asked her to marry him ten seconds later.
Years later, Inara and Kaylee would ask her how she did it. How she tamed the wild beast and made him a puppy. River replied that Jayne was far from tame, and she liked him that way.
She hadn't tamed him, it was his very nature that eventually prompted him into marrying her. This confused the companion and the mechanic, they asked for details.
River smiled and continued. "Jayne is fundamentally the greediest person I know. I figured that once he knew he wanted me, he'd always want more. He always will want more. That's just how he is. No need to change him, keep him sinful, we'll live happily ever after."