Disclaimer: I do not own Kuroshitsuji, if I did, I'd tell Sebastian that people who don't review want to wipe cats off the face of the planet. Mwahahaha. I also don't own the song About A Girl, by The Academy Is, from which I used some of the lyrics.
A/N: Warning: Slightly OOC Grell. (How is that even possible?) … and towards the end Will gets a bit OOC too...
Grell held his breath, opening the door to Will's office with the faintest of creaks. He balanced a stack of paperwork on one hand and held a cup of coffee in the other. Walking over quickly, he put both down on Will's desk. He saw the dark haired man's eyes flick to the paperwork, and then to the coffee. He sighed.
"Thank you, Sutcliff." He checked his watch. "Only half an hour late, but I suppose that's what the coffee's for." He turned his attention back to the form he'd been filling in.
Grell slowly released his breath. He'll never notice. He took a quick glance around the office, filled with bookshelves and oak furniture. When his eyes flicked back to Will, he noticed one eyebrow raised.
"Anything else?"
"...No." So much.
"Then why are you still here. Don't you have to finish that report that was due three days ago?" He asked plainly. Grell nodded and took his leave.
Walking down the empty corridor, Grell felt out of place. In a world of white and grey, why was he the only one that decided to be colourful? People walked by, wearing the same things. Grey suits, white shirts, boring, boring, boring. He glanced at his sleeve, double checking that it wasn't just his vision. Nope, bright red. Red like blood, like fire and passion, like desire and shock and hate and fury. But looking ahead, all he saw was grey. Grey like...boring and dull. Grey like...dirt. And white like innocence. How dreadful. Who wants to be innocent? He sighed.
Sick of overtime, he ignored the report for the fifth time in a row, and went home.
The morning came with no sympathy, awakening Grell with harsh white light. He lifted his head off of the desk it had been resting on. Yawning, he slowly moved his neck around, wincing when a jolt of pain caused his neck to tense. He screwed his face up, and glanced at the time. Five past nine. It wasn't like people expected him to be on time. Not even Will. He set off for the bathroom, intending on a shower. To be loved. What more could he ask for? No. He wasn't doing that. He wasn't in love. That wasn't his heart.
Grell's morning routine left much to be desired. Throwing his clothes on the floor, he searched for something clean. After ten minutes, he struck gold. In his wardrobe was a clean shirt, and hanging on the curtain pole was almost-clean trousers. He didn't stop to ponder how they got there, although it was something that he would have liked to have known. Automatically reaching to make his bed, he pitied himself. There was no point. He'd changed the sheets last week, and had fallen asleep at his desk every night since. He rubbed the left side of his face, and reached for a pillow. He placed it next to his desk, brushing off the crumpled sheets of paper. Unfinished love letters, what else. Those lines, so well rehearsed. He could almost remember it off by heart. No, he wasn't doing this now. He was late, even by his standards.
As he strolled into his office, in all it's red walled, red carpeted glory, he saw Will sat in the chair, eyebrow raised.
"Morning sunshine. You're late." Grell's breath seemed to get caught in his throat.. Will started to get up, before stopping to read the topmost sheet of paper. "I see you started that report. I want it finished by tonight, Sutcliff, or else you'll be demoted." He stood and headed for the door before half turning back. "Well? Get to work." As the door shut, Grell put a hand to his head and sighed. He'll never notice.
By five, Grell was burnt out. He was sick of reports, his hand had cramp, and his bin was full of first drafts of yet more letters. He sighed. That was it. He was sick of writing letters. Sick of not knowing. That was the worst. He knew there was next to no chance it was ever going to happen, but it was the fact that he didn't know that gave him the slightest sliver of hope.
By half five, his mind was made up. That was the end of it. The end of the letters, the joking comments about love that deep inside he knew were serious. He picked up the report, knowing exactly what he was going to say.
This was it. Now or never.
He knocked three times on the door of Will's office before frowning and opening it anyway.
His resolve broke as he saw the empty chair. It was going to have to be never. He picked up a pen, and the nearest scrap of paper (some boring old to-do list) and began to write.
' You know what? Now I know what to say. I do. I haven't for a while, but I'm sure. But you're not here to hear it. You'll never notice anyway, so I'm going to forget it '
He put the report in the bin and went home. Tch, men. Leading a lady on and then just leaving.
Grell had given up at around nine. Ice clinked in the glass of amber liquid as he held it against his pounding head. He sat at his desk, which was unnaturally clean, free of paper scraps and broken writing implements. Loosening his tie, he undid the top button from his shirt. Damn choking collar. He sank down in his chair, letting his head roll back to rest on the back of the chair, staring at the ceiling.
He jumped out of his skin when the doorbell went at twenty three minutes past eleven. Stirred from half-sleep, he blinked a couple of times before slowly getting up and sorting his neck out. Barefoot with his waistcoat unbuttoned, his tie a mess and his shirt all creased he opened the door to a surprised Will. He rolled his eyes. Typical. Who else would it be when he looked like that?
"...You look like hell." Will said, while eying him up and down, probably taking in every imperfection in his clothing. Grell did the same to the man at the door. There were bags under his eyes and his hair stuck up at odd angles. His shirt and tie were in much the same state as Grell's.
"Why thank you, darling, I can't say you look like a ray of sunshine yourself." He said, in no mood
for casual conversation. William frowned.
"I..." He waved his hands around in the air, as if trying to find something invisible. "I.. I was out earlier." Grell sighed.
"That much, I know."
"You put the report in the bin." Will said awkwardly.
"You found it." Grell, exhausted, managed a small grin.
"Of course, Sutcliff, I know when someone's been in my office." At Grell's questioning look, he blushed. "Can I come in?" Grell stood aside, closing the door once Will had gone into the next room.
"How did you know?"
"What, how did I know it was you? Or how did I know someone had been in my office?"
"Either will do."
"It smelled like you. And who else would be so melodramatic." He blushed once more. Grell raised an eyebrow, in his exhaustion not quite recognizing whether Will was joking with him or not.
"So why are you here? Am I demoted?" He rested his back against the wall, his eyes staring at the back of Will's head as Will surveyed the floor of the living room.
"Nice mess you have here." He frowned. "I-." Sigh. "I am here because of this." He waved the note in front of Grell's face.
Grell watched as Will closed his eyes for a second, before pushing his glasses up. He stood in front of Grell, close enough to touch. Close enough for Grell to smell the musky cologne.
"Don't." He said, almost a whisper. Grell closed his eyes. The get-away-from-me reaction hadn't been unexpected. His face fell, and he tried to brush Will away, turning to leave. Will stopped him.
"Don't forget about it." Will breathed. "Please." His eyes searched Grell's. "For me." His arm rested against the wall, blocking the exit that Grell had just tried to take. Grell held his breath, and nodded, almost imperceptibly. Will seemed to relax, Grell wasn't aware that he'd even been tense.
And then he leaned closer. Close enough to kiss.
When Grell woke in the morning, he was in his bed. His neck didn't hurt at all. He breathed in deeply. The warm smell of sleep mixed in with something different. Was that cologne? It was different. Musky. He opened his eyes slowly, and grinned as he was greeted by the sight of Will's sleeping form. He noticed.