Mixed Signals

'EVERY TIME WE'RE IN THE ELEVATOR YOU'RE ON YOUR DAMN PHONE and it makes it really hard to hit on you' AU

Link sighed as he finally closed the trunk of his car. This was the last box. After this box, he would officially be moved into his new apartment. As much as he loved living with Fado and Shad in their bachelor pad across town, Link needed his own place closer to his new job.

He made it to the elevator and pressed the call button. A door immediately opened to his left, and he strolled into the elevator and pressed the fourth floor button. Just as the doors were about to close, Link heard the clacking of heels against tile.

"Hold the door please," a feminine voice called.

Link fumbled with his box, almost dropping it in his haste to hit the open door button. Then the most beautiful girl he had ever seen strolled into the elevator. She was dressed in a dark grey pencil skirt with the matching jacket held in the crook of her arm. Her magenta blouse had one more button undone than was entirely proper, and her dark brunette hair was slightly mused as if she had just taken it down from a bun. Link guessed she just got off work.

He smiled at her, realizing that he looked utterly ridiculous holding his box up with his knee, still pressing the open door button. She scanned him with her pale blue eyes before giving him a small smile back and bringing her cell phone up to her ear.

"Sorry, had to catch the elevator," she said into it as she pressed the seventh floor button. "Yes, I will have the reports ready to present on Thursday."

Link sighed as he readjusted his box in his hands. There went his chance to talk to her. He glanced sideways at her. She must have been about his age, if just a bit older, but from the half of the conversation he was hearing, it seemed like she had a pretty high up job in some corporation.

Too soon for Link's liking, the elevator stopped and opened up to his floor. He walked out of the elevator with a nod to the pretty girl. He would see her again sometime. They lived in the same building after all, and she couldn't be on her phone all the time.

As Link found out over the next few days, apparently the pretty brunette could be on her phone all the time. For all of five seconds, he was excited to learn that they left for work at the same time. She was almost always in the elevator already on her phone by the time it stopped on Link's floor every morning. Today was Thursday, three days after he moved in and every morning, and evening, without fail, the mystery woman would be on her phone talking to coworkers, friends, even her mom once. Link was amazed; weren't elevators supposed to have horrible cell service for some reason. But that didn't stop the mystery brunette. Apparently she had some important presentation at work today. From what he had gleaned from the snippets of conversation he heard on elevator rides, it was a huge presentation for the CFO of her company. Link was silently rooting for her but also selfishly hoping she wouldn't be on her phone as often when this big project was over. So this morning, he waved awkwardly before he remembered that he needed to actually get in the elevator. Link shifted on his feet and tapped his fingers impatiently as the elevator slowly moved down to the lobby. Why did she have to be on the phone all the time? What he would give to just learn her name!

Link had an eventful day at work. Being a vet's physician's assistant was always an interesting job, especially when they made house calls. Like today, he helped birth a horse, just before checking sheep for lice. He didn't even know sheep could get lice. Needless to say, Link was tired when he trekked back into his apartment building that evening. He hit the call button for the elevator, thinking about ordering pizza as a reward for a job well done, when the familiar clacking of heels reminded him of a certain brunette. He glanced over his shoulder, and surprise, the mystery woman was walking toward the elevators while talking on her phone.

"Yeah, I know," she smiled. Farore, she had a pretty smile. "It went really well, so hopefully we get the job. He said he wouldn't say anything until tomorrow, but you never know with him. Oh no, that's okay. I'll call you later, bye."

Link whipped his head around. Had she actually hung up her phone? The world must have stopped turning because there she was slipping her phone into her purse as she walked onto the elevator.

Link stood there motionless, probably with his mouth agape, until she smiled and asked, "Are you getting on?"

He nodded fervently and got in the elevator, "Sorry, I was just so shocked you actually ended a call."

"I have been on my phone a lot lately," she giggled. Sweet Din, it was the most adorable giggle he had ever heard in his life. "Sorry about that, this week has been hectic for me. I'm Zelda by the way."

Link shook her hand, "I'm Link-" A lovely flute sound cut him off.

Zelda immediately reached into her purse to pull out her phone. Her eyes widened when she saw the caller ID.

"I am so sorry," she gestured to her phone. "I have to take this; it's my boss and I'm waiting to hear on a promotion. I am so sorry. I wouldn't take it otherwise."

"No it's okay," Link said as the elevator dinged. "My stop anyway. I hope you get the promotion."

She smiled sweetly at him as he left the elevator. Link waved and practically skipped to his apartment. Zelda, such a beautiful name.

Link was pretty sure he was getting a crush on Zelda. Now that they had somewhat officially introduced themselves, she greeted Link with one of her beautiful smiles every time she saw him, even if she was on the phone. And she was on her phone a lot. The nonstop calls in the elevator had, well, not stopped, and Link felt it was safe to assume she had gotten whatever promotion she had been hoping for.

But even if they had only spoken a handful of words to each other, Link couldn't help but think about Zelda a lot. Like how pretty her smile was and how cute her laugh was and how soft her hair looked. Dang, he totally had a crush on her.

So the problem was: how to flirt with someone who was always on the phone. Link had waited almost a week in a half for the miracle of Zelda not talking on her phone, but so far he had no luck. Her new job was pretty demanding, from what he had heard so far.

Link was having so much trouble trying to figure out how to communicate to Zelda, that he finally brought the issue to Fado and Shad on guy's night.

"Well, let's go about this logically," Shad suggested as Fado rolled his eyes without becoming too distracted from the video game he was playing with Link. "You can use other forms of communication besides talking."

"What, you think he should pass notes back in forth like they're in fifth grade?" Fado laughed as he smashed the buttons of his controller and destroyed some aliens in the game.

"That might not be too bad of an idea," Shad raised an eyebrow. "It could be really enduring if you play it just right."

"But I don't want to distract her from her call too much," Link said as his avatar reloaded his sniper rifle on screen. "Most of the time she's talking to someone about work. I think she has a really demanding job."

"You said her name was Zelda," Shad asked as he pulled out his phone. "Any idea what her company's name is?"

"Are you gonna Google her or something?" Link asked as he moved his avatar to a new hiding spot.

"Of course," Shad rolled his eyes. "I'm surprised you haven't done this yet. She must at least have a Facebook account."

Link stuck his tongue between his teeth. He hadn't thought of that at all.

"I think the company is Nohansen something or maybe Harkinian," Link supplied. "She says those names a lot."

Shad frowned slightly as he typed in this new information and the search screen loaded.

"Holy Mother of Hylia," Shad gasped as he perused the content of the first link Google coughed up.

"What?" Link quickly paused the game, much to Fado's annoyance, and rushed to look at Shad's phone over his shoulder.

"She's the Director of Finance for Harkinian Inc.," Shad exclaimed. Link only looked at him blankly. "She's one of the highest directors in the company." Link still did not understand the significance of Shad's words. "Okay then, let me put it this way. She's about five steps away from being the head of the company."

"Holy Farore," Link understood now. "No wonder she has a seventh floor apartment." He scratched the back of his neck.

Fado busted out laughing, "Man, Link, you are so screwed."

"He is not screwed," Shad chided. "He just needs to be extra creative and not embarrass himself."

"Thanks for the support, guys," Link sighed as he threw his head into his hands.

"Don't give up hope, Link," Shad gave him a sympathetic pat on the back. "I'm sure we'll think of something."

Three hours and one six pack later, the boys hadn't come up with a better plan than passing notes with Zelda while in the elevator.

"What if you used those baseball hang signals?" Fado suggested.

"So I can tell her to sac-bunt a guy over to second?" Link wacked Fado upside the head. "We're getting nowhere with this."

"I still think you're best bet is to write her a simple note," Shad explained for the fifth time. "Just make it short and simple, that way you can make the first move and leave the next step up to her discretion."

"It seems like that's my only option," Link leaned back to stare at the ceiling as if the roof would open up and present a better choice for him. "Nayru, that's so lame."

The next morning, despite his minor headache, Link was prepared to execute his poor attempt at flirting with Zelda. He had formulated a pretty cock and bull plan with Shad and Fado the night before, and he was still very nervous about actually doing it. He quickly pocketed his Sharpie and packet of Post-it notes as the elevator arrived on his floor. Zelda was already in the elevator, as usual, talking on the phone to some person at her work.

The doors closed behind Link, and he sent Zelda a sideways glance. She was wearing an impeccable black pant suit with a royal blue blouse underneath. She was absolutely stunning, which made the task Link was about to do all the more challenging.

She smiled at him, and courage welled within Link. He could do this.

He took out the Sharpie and Post-it notes stashed in his pockets and began writing:

Hey! Remember me?

My name is Link, and I live in 4D.

Call me at 8068.9274 if you ever

want a free dinner and a break from work

Link read through the note twice to make sure it was legible before ripping the top Post-it off. The elevator opened up to the lobby, and Link turned to press the Post-it note he had written on to Zelda's phone. She stared at him in confusion, but Link only winked at her before leaving the elevator without a second glance.

While he seemed calm, cool, and collected as he strutted out of the apartment building, once Link reached his car, he nearly had a breakdown. How could he do something so stupid? Zelda was never going to call him, let alone come over for dinner. Farore, why was he such an idiot? Why did he think he could pull this off?

He spent the whole day at work somewhere between having a panic attack and passing out. Rusl got on to him three times for not paying attention, but Link couldn't help it. He was so nervous to see how Zelda would respond to his Post-it note. He felt ready to throw up as he returned home that evening. Knowing he was most likely going to run into Zelda on his way back up to his apartment was only making it worse. He just knew Zelda hated him now. She would never speak to him again. He wouldn't get to see her smile again. Somehow that thought was what made him most sad.

Link's stomach dropped as he heard the tell-tale clacking of heels on tile. He turned to see Zelda walking toward the elevators (Link gulped) without talking on her phone. Oh Sweet Din, she was going to reject him. Holy Farore, he did not want it to end like this.

The elevator dinged, and Link and Zelda filed into the lift. Link shuffled awkwardly, waiting for the inevitable rejection. He glanced at Zelda to see her dialing a number on her phone. Even better, she was just going to ignore him. Link felt his heart sink. Then his phone went off. Confused he fished it out of his pocket to see an unknown number calling him. He accepted the call and lifted his phone to his ear.

"This is Link," he said.

"Hi Link?" a feminine voice echoed. Link's jaw dropped. He turned to face Zelda to see the most mischievous smile he had ever seen spread across her face. "This is Zelda, from the elevator."

"Oh, yeah Zelda who's always on her phone," Link smiled.

Zelda laughed, "The very same. I was calling to see if I could take you up on your dinner offer."

"I'm sorry; I didn't catch that," Link smirked slightly. "I'm in an elevator right now, and you know they don't have the greatest service. Could you repeat that?"

"I was wondering if I could take you up on your dinner offer," Zelda said loudly and slowly.

"Wow this is such short notice," Link ran his free hand through his hair in fake indecision. "I may only have pizza to offer for dinner."

"That's alright," Zelda smiled as the elevator opened on the fourth floor. She followed Link out onto the landing. "I've been craving some greasy junk food for a while."

"Perfect," Link laughed as he started down the hall to his apartment. "I'll meet you at my place in say, ten seconds."

"I'll be there," she giggled.

They both hung up and turned to face each other when they reached Link's door.

"I'm glad you could make it," Link said as he opened the door.

"I'm glad you invited me."