Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters that appear in my story. They all belong to Amy Sherman-Palladino.
Warning: This story begins with consensual sex that turns non consensual. I am aware that this content may be disturbing/triggering to some, so please keep that in mind. I'd also like to note that in the real world, no means no - regardless if there was originally consent or regardless how far into the encounter the consent stops.
I'd tried to make it as non graphic as I could, while still telling the story. This is only my second attempt at fanfiction (the first being for a different show and many many years ago!) I don't mind constructive criticism as long as it's helpful. Go easy on me though, I'm super nervous about posting this! Also, I don't have a beta, so any grammar or spelling errors are my own.
Looking back, she doesn't recall who made the first move. One minute she was drowning herself in a bottle of tequila and the next minute they were frantically making out on his couch. All she can remember is the numbness she felt in her body, their frantic kisses on the couch turning into hasty undressing in his bedroom. Then somehow they were naked, and he was hovering over her.
"Are you sure about this Lore?" He leant down and captured her lips in a kiss.
"Yes, Christopher. Please. I need this," she whimpered in return.
Slowly, he ran his length up and down her folds then eased into her inch by inch. He groaned at the heat wrapped around him and leaned down once more to kiss her. As his lips descended on hers and his length filled her, she let her mind go blank. This was good; she needed this. She needed something, anything to make her feel again. The numbness overwhelmed her and she felt detached from her body, unable to tell where she ended and he began.
"Please... Move..." She begged him.
He slowly began to glide in an out of her, picking up his pace as her body adjusted to him inside her. His hand skimmed down her side, flicking her nipple, as he braced his weight on his other arm. He nuzzled his face into the crook of her neck and inhaled her scent, his arousal blossoming,
Lorelai lay there quietly, letting him use her body. The numbness continued to press down on her and she tried desperately to focus on the act going on. With a hum of frustration, she realized she was nowhere close to orgasm. Christopher panted above her and she could tell he was starting to get close. He looked down at her and frowned. Normally Lorelai was an active and vocal participant during sex. It was odd for her to lay there so passively beneath him, neither moaning nor moving her hips in an effort to meet his thrusts. He reached a hand down between them and rubbed her clit, hoping to elicit a reaction from her. She screwed her eyes shut and tried to focus on chasing the pleasure she so desperately needed.
Nothing.
Instead, she cringed at how rough his fingers felt on her clit and how uncomfortable he suddenly felt thrusting in and out of her. A sharp stab of pain woke her from the numbness that had been clouding her mind and her previous arousal disappeared. With growing horror she could only focus on the horrible, sinking feeling in her gut. Dread descended upon her as she realized what she was doing. She turned her head and her eyes caught the moonlight glistening on her engagement ring. Nausea roiled in her stomach and she thought she might be sick.
Christopher leaned down once more to capture her lips, but revulsion filled her. She twisted her head away from him and a strangled "stop!" escaped her lips. He froze above her, "Lore?"
"I...I... I need to go Chris," she whimpered as she struggled to extricate her body from beneath his.
"Hey, come on Lore... I thought we were having a good time." He pressed his body weight into hers and suckled at the spot he knew she liked behind her ear. His fingers messaged her clit, hoping to pleasure her enough to change her mind. He began to move again as his desire for her overtook him.
"No Chris. I...I don't want this anymore... it hurts," she pleaded with him and writhed beneath him, desperate to escape.
He captured her jaw in his hand and forced her to look at him. His eyes were clouded with drunkenness and lust.
"You wanted this," he growled. "You can't just decide in the middle that you're done. You got me all worked up and now I'm almost done and I can't stop now. Just relax and it will feel better. I love you," he whispered as he peppered her face with kisses.
He picked up his pace again and panted into her face. The sour smell of alcohol caused her to crinkle her nose up in disgust and she turned her head away. She braced her hands on his chest in an effort to push him off and get him to stop.
"Please..." She whispered. "I don't want this Chris. Please stop. You're hurting me."
He continued on as if he didn't hear her and she struggled to push him off her. "Get off me!" She shrieked suddenly.
His hand clamped down on her mouth and he whispered into her ear angrily, "Shut up! I'll be done in a minute, just relax."
Lorelai began to cry beneath him and gasped for breath as she struggled against the hand clasped tightly over her nose and mouth. His movement reached a frantic pace that signaled he was about to come. He groaned and gave a last thrust and held himself inside her body as he came. She struggled to push him off as he collapsed on top of her.
Finally managing to extricate herself from him, she leapt out of the bed and frantically began looking for her clothes.
Christopher reached out and tried to grasp her arm as she escaped from the bed. "Come on Lore, I'm sorry. I couldn't stop, I was so close. You wanted it, you told me you wanted it. You begged me for it. Just come back to bed and get some sleep. I'll make it up to you, I promise."
"I have to go Chris! This was wrong! God, this was so wrong. I told you to stop." Her voice cracked as she let out a strangled sob at the last word.
She stumbled blindly around the room searching for her dress, bra, and panties. Spotting her dress balled up in the corner, she yanked it on and decided to forgo the search for her bra and panties. She fumbled at the strings of her dress, willing her hands to stop shaking enough to tie the wrap closed.
Chris reached out and tried to tie the knot for her, but Lorelai flinched away from his touch. "Don't touch me Christopher!" She exclaimed and he caught a hint of fear flash through her eyes.
He backed away and puts his hands up. "Hey, I'm sorry, alright? I don't want you to leave upset like this," Chris said as he watched her stumble around the room. "Stay. It's late. I can sleep on the couch; you can take the bed and we'll talk in the morning."
"I can't do this, I need to go. Bye Christopher," she whispered shakily.
Her breath came in pants as she struggled not to completely fall apart. Tears ran down her cheeks as she ran out of the apartment, forgetting her shoes in her haste to leave. She ran to the elevator and began hitting the down button, tapping her foot frantically on the floor as she willed it to appear. She glanced back at the closed door of Chris' apartment and gave another sob. Tired of waiting for the elevator, she ran down the stairs and out into the night.
Her stomach lurched and she stumbled over to the bushes neatly trimming the building and vomited violently. She panted and gagged as her stomach rebelled against the alcohol still coursing through her body and the knowledge of what she did. Wiping the back of her hand across her mouth she grimaced at the foul taste left behind. She doubled over on the sidewalk, bracing her hands against her knees as she gasped for breath. Tears and snot mingled together as they coursed down her face. She sank to the ground and sobbed, ignoring the sharp sting as her bare knees made impact with the concrete.
Slowly, she managed to calm herself enough to crawl into her jeep. Leaning her forehead against the steering wheel, she sat there numbly. She glanced at the clock on the dashboard and saw it was somewhere around 3 in the morning. A shaky breath escaped her as she rubbed a hand across her tired face. Composing herself as much as she could, she steeled herself for the long, lonely drive back to Stars Hallow.
AN: Well, that's the first chapter. I've got 2 or so more chapters mostly written. I've just been going back and rereading them and adding to them. I didn't realize how hard it was to make decent chapter lengths. I don't know how you all manage to come up with 6000 word chapters! Anyway, I probably won't be updating more than once a week, just as a warning. It will probably take me that long anyway to steel myself to post the next chapter lol. Erg. Anyway, posting this before I change my mind!