Notes - The first verse is from the wonderful fan fiction Casting MoonShadows and she wrote that it was part of a popular wizarding anthem. Naturally I felt obligated to make sure the rest of the song existed in some way (despite my questionable writing skills) because the first verse was so funny and awesome. So as a tribute to the lovely Moonsign, whose fine writing is beyond anything I can hope to achieve, here's my version of the rest of Gertrude the snow toll.
Disclaimer - Well since this is a fan fiction based on a fan fiction, I don't own anything. The idea and character belongs to the fantastic Moonsign and all things Harry Potter belongs to J.K. Rowling who has my utmost respect for her wonderful creation.
Gertrude the snow troll - Cassandra Lane
* Gertie the snow troll,
Has a very orange nose
And a smell so bad
That it drives men mad,
And kills cats where'er she goes.*
Gertie the snow troll
Has very stringy purple hair
And a voice so shrill
It drives men to kill
For the torture no one should bear
Gertie the snow troll
Has a very floppy pair of ears
And a bum so big
She resembles a fig
And everyone who sees her tears
Gertie the snow troll
Has a very furry upper lip
And toe nails so long
That its just wrong
They really need a little nip
Gertie the snow troll
Has extremely scaly skin
And teeth so rotten
That they aren't soon forgotten
They make for quite a scary grin
Gertie the snow troll
Has a very bushy brow
Thats right just one
It can't be fun
When they're so big she needs a plough