.
She glanced once more at their interlocking hands, watching the shape of his fingers, attentive to their subtle movements as they stroked hers. She memorized every muscle, every scar, every line of his hand as it danced in contact with hers. A light, gentle touch, and yet firm, vivid. The warmth that emanated from his touch was so strong she could not help bringing their clasped hands closer to her chest, pressing them against her with all the strength she had as she closed her eyes, wishing that this moment would last forever. Around them there was just an infinite of blank, interrupted only by the bed in which they were laying, keeping each another close.
He smiled behind her, using the arm he wrapped around her to pull a lock of pink hair from her face and placed a delicate kiss on her forehead.
''I need to go.'' He murmured, his voice trying to hide a feeling she could not quite decipher. Repentance?
"Stay," she said softly, and then repeated it with more determination, raising her voice to make sure he would hear it. ''please stay.''
With luck, he would understand all the meaning she was trying to convey in that one word. All the promises and dreams of a happy and unparalleled future together that she had placed in those two syllables.
"I'm sorry ..." He buried his face in her neck, inhaling the smell of her hair and trying not to let it show what he felt inside, the ocean of emotions that hit him so hard that he was sure that if he uttered another word she would be able to hear everything his whole being wanted to tell her, but that he felt he needed to conceal. It was better this way, he told himself, the nth time that day.
She thought her heart would start pounding at that moment. She thought she would fall into despair, that all known emotions would take over her body and she would not be able to prevent tears from starting to fall from her eyes, to stop them from running freely over her face as she screamed, begged, that he would not leave her again. That she would hold him tightly and make him stay, even against his will. But what good would that do?
She twisted her lips until they formed a thin line, then closed her eyes for a moment and opened them again, and if she could look at them at that moment, she would be able to see that they were reflecting something new to her, something she had struggled with for too long, but now she took hold of it and felt it like a wave, filling every fiber of her being.
Conformation.
She turned to him slowly.
"Well," she began, a sad smile on her face. "There's nothing I can do or say to stop that then, is there?" Her eyes met his and for a moment she thought she would shatter looking into his deep, sorrowful eyes. But it lasted only a second, she wondered if she had imagined it, and then his gaze started to reflect the same as hers. He had already made his decision, there was nothing left for them there.
He turned her to him and kissed the back of her hand tenderly before caressing her face one last time.
''Thank you'' he whispered, running his face down hers, memorizing every detail and, unlike the last time he had uttered those same words to her, he felt he needed to add something more ''For having changed me in these last six months. For having helped me grow, for having understood me, comforted me, brought me peace and love when I was about to lose faith in myself. Thank you for believing in me. I know you have changed me, and I am grateful for every moment we've spent together.''
She did not answer. Instead, she lowered her eyes and nodded. What was she supposed to say? It was not her choice to say goodbye. If it were up to her, there would be no farewells, ever, there would be nothing but new beginnings and new discoveries between them, every day, forever. But what could she do? He wanted to go. In her mind, if the words he said were really true, there would be no goodbyes from his part either.
And she did not want sentimental demagogies.
"See you around then.'' She said when at last she found the strength to speak again, plunging for the last time into that onyx ocean where she had become so accustomed to getting lost.
He smirked at her, the same smile that once brightened her sky, that made her feel overwhelmed with emotions and made it seem like everything would be okay. That it would always be okay. The last time he would ever smile at her like that. She knew this time there was no chance of him to return, but still she wanted to embrace hope.
''See you around.'' He repeated, looking deeply into her green eyes.
Carefully, he let go of her, got up without averting their eyes and then turned his back to her, walking away slowly, but with determined steps.
She watched his back as he moved, silently wishing he would turn around and look back at her one last time. Wishing that he would have a last-minute change of heart, decide that he didn't want to lose her too.
But he didn't do any of that.
He kept on walking with no sign of hesitation, no sign of regret. He walked quietly to the infinity. He had made his choice.
Sakura put both her hands on her chest and pressed them tightly against herself before lowering her face to observe them. She stroked her own fingers, watching every muscle, every scar and every line as they intertwined with each other.
And she smiled. She looked up as a single, lonely tear fell from her face, but it was no longer sadness that she felt.
It was hope.
She knew that, one way or another, she would be all right.
She had herself and she always would.
And she would never give her up.
And as long as she had herself, she understood, she would never be alone.
.
Thank you so much for reading Alone! This is actually my first fanfic and I'm so nervous to be sharing it with you guys hahahah ! English is not my first language, but I swear I did my very best to write it in the best way I could, I really hope you like it! Please leave a review if you have a minute to spare, I would love to hear what you thought while reading it and know if you have some tips for me to improve my writing :3 !