Disclaimer: I do not own Girl Meets World.
Warning: Contains depictions of consensual f/f sex.
Riley is sixteen when she finds out about pansexuality. Her class is given an assignment to learn about the current issues facing a minority group. Riley chooses the LGBTQ community as her topic, since she's always believed that love should not be constrained by society's prejudices. And so, working through the secure filter of safe-search software, she begins to research the spectrum of human sexuality - something which she has little first-hand experience of, apart from a few kisses with Lucas, and those awkward lessons in 'health' class.
Riley discovers that the Internet has a lot more to say on the topic than her gym teacher did. She learns about the gay rights movement, and how it struggles against bigotry, homophobia, and heteronormative prejudice, and picks up a lot of new terminology along the way. She already knew the definitions of heterosexuality and homosexuality, and had some understanding of bisexuality. Pansexuality - those who identify as being attracted to others based on personality traits or an emotional connection, rather than gender or biological sex - is a new one that gets added to her vocabulary.
Riley's assignment presents a passionate argument in favour of people being allowed to love whoever they wish, and it earns her an 'A'.
In the weeks that follow, Riley still finds herself thinking about that assignment. She likes the idea that people can find and fall in love with their true soulmate, and be together, regardless of what body they may have been born into. After all, if you really love somebody and connect with them, does it even matter what they look like on the outside? Or what 'parts' they might have been born with?
As the weeks turn into months, Riley's thoughts about her relationship with Maya slowly start to change. There have been plenty of times when the two of them have referred to each other as soulmates. And although they have both dated boys at various times, and maybe even had a vague notion of one day finding husbands and having children, Riley has always known that she would never love another person as deeply and fiercely as she loves Maya; would never want to be around someone as much as she wants to be around Maya; can't imagine living a life where Maya wasn't the most important part of it. Riley had always thought that the marriage and children would have to fit around that somehow, without really knowing how it would. But now she begins to wonder… Isn't that all rather… heteronormative?
Riley realises that, given the choice, there is no other person she would rather spend her life with than Maya. If she was ever to get married and start a family, wouldn't it be nice if it could be with the person she loves the most? Her soulmate?
Riley can't consciously remember ever being attracted to a girl. But she's always thought Maya was beautiful inside and out - the most beautiful, amazing, wonderful person ever; more beautiful, amazing, and wonderful than a combination of all the world's other most beautiful, amazing, and wonderful things put together. And of course hugs from Maya are her favourite hugs of all. And holding hands with Maya is one of her other favourite things to do. And kissing Maya… Well kisses show someone that you love them, and Riley always wants to show Maya that she is loved, so Riley thinks that would also be nice…
Is it just possible that she, Riley Matthews, is pansexual… and hopelessly, madly in love with Maya Hart?
By the time Riley is sixteen-and-a-half, she knows for certain that she is hopelessly, madly in love with Maya Hart. And probably has been for quite some time.
She's not exactly sure of the next step, though; hasn't said anything to anyone about her new self-understanding. She's just not sure how Maya would feel about the whole thing. Or, specifically, about her. Of course, Riley has no concerns about losing Maya - she knows their friendship is strong enough to survive anything. But she's enjoying spending every day with Maya - just as they are now - way too much to have it interrupted, even temporarily, by the awkward pause that could very well follow a confession of feelings that are not returned.
Riley ends things with Lucas for good - it seems dishonest and unfair not to, given how she feels. He doesn't seem particularly surprised, and they manage to stay friends afterwards. And then Riley gives up any pretence of dating, and just focuses on spending time with Maya, doing as much cool, fun, best-friend stuff as they can, and enjoying the fact that she has the bestest best friend in the world, and trying hard to be the bestest best friend she can be in return.
And although Maya might never return Riley's feelings in exactly the same way, now that Riley understands her own emotions, the world makes a little more sense.
On Riley's seventeenth birthday, she and Maya share their first kiss. It happens at the bay window, which is so totally appropriate for them, as so many of their important moments have happened there. Riley's parents had thrown a birthday party for her in the apartment. The night was absolutely perfect, with all of her family and friends in attendance. There had been games, and thoughtful gifts, and music, and dancing - Riley had danced mostly with Maya - and a sparkly, multi-coloured cake with seventeen candles for Riley to blow out and make a wish on.
After everyone else has left, Riley and Maya sit side-by-side at the bay window, in their pyjamas, tired but far too hyped up to go to sleep yet.
"So how does it feel to be seventeen?" asks Maya.
"I'm not sure yet," replies Riley. "I don't really feel that different to how I did yesterday. But then I think about the fact that I'm now only one year away from being a legal adult, and maybe I do feel a little more grown up."
"We're ticking off those landmarks one-by-one," says Maya with a smile.
"I'm glad I'm getting to tick them off with you," Riley says, not caring that it probably sounds cheesy. "I want you to be there for all of them."
"Likewise," says Maya.
"I'm sorry if I hogged you all to myself, Peaches. You probably wanted to spend some time with Josh."
Maya shakes her head. "You're the one I want to spend the most time with, Riles. Always have, always will."
"Likewise," answers Riley. They hold each other's gaze for a long moment. "Sometimes I wish…" Riley whispers, before trailing off, her heart suddenly pounding and her eyes prickling.
Maya reaches over and takes her hand. "It's okay, Honey. You can go ahead and say it. Say whatever you've been wanting to say to me these past few months."
And whether it's because of Maya's words, or the way that she is looking at Riley with those beautiful eyes so full of love, like she's the most precious thing in the world, Riley suddenly finds herself blurting it all out. "I wish that you could be my one-and-only, my everything, my soulmate and true love. My forever, the one that I spend the rest of my life with. I love you so much! I can't even imagine loving anyone else as much as I love you." And she knows Maya understands exactly what she means, because the other girl is looking at her with love and adoration, as well as a little pride, a sweet smile upon her lips, and her eyes brimming with tears.
"I love you too, Riley. Always have, always will." And then she leans in and places a soft, sweet, lingering kiss on Riley's lips, and Riley realises instantly that it's the most amazing kiss she has ever had, and that sometimes birthday wishes do come true.
They separate, faces inches apart, and Riley asks, "You knew what I was going to say?"
"I suspected. I do know you pretty well, after all. Something changed with you in the last few months. No-one else would have noticed it but me. But it didn't seem to be causing you any worry, so I was happy to let you tell me in your own time."
"And you feel the same way?"
Maya nods.
"I didn't notice a change in you," admits Riley.
"Because I've always felt like this," Maya replies simply. "And I always hoped and believed we'd end up together one day. But I needed you to figure it out for yourself. I didn't want to just dump all my feelings on you and possibly cause hurt and confusion."
"You're always one step ahead of me." Riley chuckles. "Sorry for making you wait."
"You're worth waiting for. And now that you've caught up, I can finally ask what I've been wanting to for a while now. Riley Matthews, will you be my girlfriend?"
"Yes!" responds Riley exuberantly, and Maya leans in to kiss her once again. Their second kiss is just as amazing as their first, and now that Riley knows Maya returns her feelings, and they are officially a couple, the world makes much more sense.
It's after senior prom that Riley and Maya make love for the first time. Their final year of high school has been totally amazing, with all the wonderful and poignant experiences that it should have - made all the better because they could share those experiences as a couple, with the full support of their family and friends, who quite honestly didn't seem that surprised at the new nature of their relationship.
They go to prom as a couple, and get nice photos taken, and drink non-alcoholic punch, and dance the night away with each other. Farkle hosts an after-party at his family's vast and expensive penthouse, but Riley and Maya leave early, and head to a nice hotel room, that Riley saved up for to book for the night.
They had discussed this; knew they were both ready for this next step; both wanting to take it. It's beautiful and romantic, with soft music and muted lighting. There is slow-dancing, and kissing, and hands that softly caress as they slowly strip each others' prom dresses off. When they finally make it to the bed, it is leisurely and unhurried, both of them perfectly relaxed as they explore the new territory now accessible to their hands and mouths, delighting in every wonderful sensation.
Their first time is perfect, everything it should be. Riley never realised just how in-sync with someone else she could be, moving together, so focussed on each other, on the bond between them; feeling and experiencing such intense emotions as one, feeling like they could almost become one being, nothing but a thin layer of skin and sweat between them.
Afterwards, they lie together, arms around each other, limbs entwined, staring into each others' eyes with loving, goofy smiles on their faces, and all sense of time is lost. Riley has so many thoughts swirling around in her head, so many emotions pounding in her chest, she doesn't think she will ever be able express them. But she looks at Maya's face, and knows that the other girl is thinking and feeling the same, and so Riley contents herself with just placing one more kiss upon Maya's swollen lips, before the other girl rests her head on her shoulder.
As her hand languidly strokes Maya's arm, olive skin contrasting against pale white, Riley's attention is caught by her friendship ring. She lifts her hand up and gazes at it thoughtfully, as she absently runs her thumb along the metal.
"What's on your mind, my love?" Maya asks from beside her, her voice soft, and a little hoarse from the cries Riley had elicited from her earlier.
"I was just thinking…" says Riley, her voice barely above a whisper, "Would it be okay if I started wearing this on my ring finger? It just feels like that's the appropriate place for it now."
"Like… a promise ring?" asks Maya.
"Exactly like a promise ring," confirms Riley. "I already know we're going to be together forever, I'd just like something to symbolise how committed I am to you."
Maya smiles, then shifts so she can take Riley's hand in both of hers. She slips Riley's ring off, and replaces it on the ring finger of her left hand, then holds out her own hand so that Riley can do the same for her.
"Thunder…" "Lightning…" "Forever," they clasp hands and reaffirm, before snuggling together again under the sheets.
And as Riley lies there with Maya in her arms, and the sure knowledge in her heart that she and Maya will love each other like this always, the world now makes perfect sense.