ALL USUAL DISCLAIMERS APPLY

A/N: This is a multi-chapter treat; an interlude for the story Kentish Cottage. This is M-rated for several reasons. If you don't like it, don't read it. If you read it nonetheless, don't blame me.

I had intended to also write a T-rated version of this but refrained from doing so. Read this!

Enjoy!

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Without waiting for a reaction Barbara turned and led the way. It was up to Tommy now. She was not feeling totally ready for that step. A tiny voice inside still was telling her that she should not do it but most of her body and mind was willing to embark on it, no matter the consequences, no matter how it could end, no matter how devastated she would be when it ends. Because it also could be ending in the most fantastic future with him.

He followed. She heard the steps creaking when she stopped at the corner into the spacious room, watching her bed that still was not made.

Barbara sighed in the moment Tommy stood behind her. "Second thoughts about... us?" he whispered right into her ear. His hands were tentatively placed on her hips.

"No, I just-" she quietly started but then made a pause. For a brief moment she had to think before she, as if she tried to convince herself, answered with a firm voice. "No."

"Good." Pressing against her body from behind Tommy whispered onto her neck. "Neither have I. Not the slightest."

Barbara leaned into his chest. He was murmuring sweet reassuring words into her ear. His deep voice sent more than pleasurable shivers down her spine. With his silken voice he told her how much he loved her. He muttered how deep he was in love with her for several years even though he did not understand his feelings at first and even had tried to find solace in the arms of other women. His arms were around her waist and Barbara caressed his hands on her belly with closed eyes. "But for me they don't count anymore."

Barbara straightened her shoulders and raised her chin. She loved him but for her it all still counted. It had left too many impacts on her soul.

"I knew I've fallen in love with you when I told you that you're in love with Helen." she confessed. "And it's been hurting me more than it should have. Later I was completely lost and tossed about when we've stayed in that trailer park and she had returned to you. Yes, I was... jealous, somehow. But it was more painful to see you mourning the loss. Not because of me but because I never could stand seeing you in pain. And another bit later I knew I could never love another man when you've had that affair with Sandra. And then Julia."

For a few moments there was absolute silence. Tommy just held her upper arms and had placed his forehead against the back of hers. He had not expected her to confess such a secret nor had he expected what she was confessing. He heard a sigh. Barbara had not expected she would be able to say it all aloud. It was a relief although she had not revealed all of her secrets about the secret love for her boss.

"You're my boss, you're an earl, you're... well, you're you. You and I are from completely different sides of society. There's the hell of a lot at stake for me. For my work, for my mind, for my heart and my sanity. I love you and I'm afraid to lose you too soon when you get bored of me. I'm thrilled, excited and absolutely scared. So, yes, I do have a lot of second thoughts about... us."

"I'm sorry, Barbara. How can I ever make up for everything?" His soft caresses and kisses on her neck and behind her ear had been so nice and gentle that despite her serious speech Barbara had a certain thing on her mind all the time. She was tempted to say it aloud. It obviously was on Tommy's mind too. It would not erase her fears but it surely would be the most wonderful thing that could happen to her. And she was eager to take what she could get today. After all it was her birthday.

"I have a vague idea..." she breathed finally relaxing into his chest again.

"I really love you, Barbara." he murmured onto the spot behind her ear that let him feel her goosepimples every time he touched it with his lips. "Am I allowed to undress you?"

"Of course." she croaked.

His hands grabbed the hem of her T-shirt and with her help he lifted it above her head. Carelessly he tossed it to the side and let his fingers glide across her arms and shoulders, then down her back. With no effort Tommy opened the clasp of her bra and pulled it down at its thin straps. It landed on her shirt on the floor. Seconds later his knuckles tickled the sides of her upper chest while he left kisses on the naked skin of her shoulders. Then the warmth of his hands covered her breasts completely.

"Oh..." Barbara breathed. She had felt his crotch pressing onto her bottom cheeks for just a few more seconds.

In order to pull off his own shirt he had to move away from her. Still facing her bed she saw it flying to the other garments. His chest though did not return to her back's skin. Just the tips of his fingers stroked across her arms again.

"Will you turn around?"

Without thinking about it Barbara turned.

"Don't be afraid." he whispered. "Of anything. We can do it. We're going to make it work. Because I love you too." He laughed. "I love you. And I can't stop saying it." A little smile appeared in the corners of her lips. Tommy made a step forward, his eyes never leaving hers. Silently he still was giving her the chance to stop and retreat but it was all but Barbara's intention. She just wanted to feel his naked chest against her skin. It turned into a wonderful moment. There was no hurry and so, starting with the tips of her breasts on his upper rib cage, their touch was quite an intense journey they made inch by inch, enjoying every moment they came closer.

Barbara let her flat hands glide across his shoulders before they finally stood so close that a kiss was inevitable. It deepened quickly and their arousal grew. His was palpable and hers was obvious. Moaning softly she pressed herself against him. Tommy rucked up her shorts and kneaded her thighs just below her bottom. Barbara dug her fingers into each and every muscle she could reach.

Eventually she pulled at his trousers and stepped backwards. The bed was close and so they tumbled onto it together.

They landed on it in a rather ridiculous way so it was no wonder that they had to laugh loud, no matter how serious, romantic or erotically charged the situation had been minutes before.

"Come to me, Barbara. Please skid further onto the bed."

She did so until she was level with him. Still they did not lie there properly. They laid crosswise using the duvet as a pillow. It was a hilarious situation but when their laughter eventually had ebbed their eyes drowned in each other's for a while. Absentminded Tommy caressed her waist. Barbara played gently with his sparse chest hairs.

"Show me what to do." she suddenly whispered.

"Just follow your heart." Tommy moved his face close to hers and kissed her. "But I'm very sure you know." he reassured her but she was not convinced.

"Just a fragment of what's possible. Teach me all." Finally she allowed him to kiss her properly. They shared a long kiss during which their half naked bodies moved closer.

Tommy broke the kiss after several moments. "I'm going to teach you some things, Barbara." He kissed her again. "And I'm looking forward to learn the rest from you!"

"Oh, Tom- mmmh."

His lips sealed hers. He was not willing to talk now. He wanted to make love with her.

Hence his firm grip when he turned her onto her back until he was able to climb half above her.

Barbara had no objections at all.

They kissed wild and ravenous for a while before it turned deeper and slower. Eventually Tommy kissed a way down her throat and cleavage. With closed eyes Barbara laid there feeling his lips wander softly across her breasts. Gentle nibbling turned her nipples into hard buds in no time and it did not make her feel uncomfortable when he graced her belly with the tips of his fingers. Only when she missed his touch and the weight of his body and the warmth of his skin for several seconds she opened her eyes again.

Tommy was kneeling above her right thigh, his hands akimbo, his eyes on hers, his lips widened into a savouring smile.

"What?" she croaked.

"I love you." he answered. Barbara swallowed down a happy sob. "And I'm going to undress you completely now."

"Okay..." A hot blush crept from her face all over her chest but she nodded.

Slowly he pulled down the waistband of her shorts. Barbara helped by lifting her hips. Without caring where they would land Tommy tossed them away and placed small kisses on the destroyed skin on her belly where she once had been riddled with bullets.

"Tommy, don't!" she tried to keep him away from there. She did not like the ugly scars.

"Sh!" he breathed onto her skin. Tommy placed a kiss on her navel. Then he let his fingertips caress her thighs up and down before he lifted himself again to slowly remove her panties.

Barbara closed her eyes and immediately opened her legs to him bending her left knee. She was surprised to feel him climbing off her other thigh and refusing her invitation by softly pushing her legs together again and so she opened her eyes again.

He still smiled. "We're not that far yet. Will you help me with my jeans?"

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