A/N: I don't own Devil May Cry or/and Sekirei and I don't get any profit from this story aside from some fun and moral satisfaction.

For those, who knows DMC3 canon well enough, you can skip the prologue and wait for (or read if you looking at this much later then I wrote this prologue) next chapter. Here is mostly recounting of game events with few minor differences, details and small jokes from me, so you might get bored. And if you think this is boring then don't flame me in reviews because I warned you.

But if you want to review for different reason, then be my guest!

It all started on a gloomy night.

At first nothing suggested that there would be any kind of unusual and troublesome situation. Just a simple evening at simple city, though some might say it was quiet that day. Too quiet. Too damn quiet.

But it was not for long.

First sign of coming troubles took appearance of middle-aged man. That man was looking quite unusually - sharp eyes, one yellow and one reminiscent of blue steel in color, bald head with dark burn-mark on left side of his face and dark grey suit of a priest. In his hands was a book in leathery cover with no discernible words on it. Though if you would look closely you could see some patterns printed on it.

Arkham – for that was his name – stopped before one of the buildings on the street devoid of people and cars. There was nothing highly unusual about that exact building. Small two-story high house made of grey bricks with double stained glass doors. Though this is the only building like that in the neighborhood, you could find something more eye-catching if you look around like local cinema or pizza parlor that was often raided by the inhabitant of house in question. But shadow of evil smirk that appeared on the lips of Arkham proved that he was at the place he wants to be. After thoroughly observing that particular building he entered through main entrance.

Just a couple of minutes in there and silence in the air was broken for the rest of this night. From shining red circles of eldritch symbols jumped few figures in black tattered robes with hoods holding scythes in their hands. They jumped in windows, crashing them and few moments' later show started. Sounds of gunshots, loud crashes, metallic clangs, demonic howls and wails, excited battle cries and taunts of young man mixed with loud rock music. That lasted for about five minutes before coming to a stop. Then after a minute of silence and single gunshot doors to main entrance were blown over with a kick.

Out of the building came its inhabitant – young man with impressive muscles of light athlete, aristocratic face features, white brushed-down hair that reach little higher than his shoulders and light blue eyes. He wore a red leather coat above naked torso, dark pants tugged in combat boots and black fingerless leather gloves while being armed with two pistols in holsters behind his lower back and big straight sword in his right hand. That man was Dante – well-known mercenary in certain circles, specializing in devil hunting. He slowly walked out of his house/office/closed junkyard (whatever you like to describe his home) while holding his prized blade Rebellion on right shoulder. That was impressive double-edged sword with length coming close to his height decorated with metallic skull, ribcage and bones at its cross guard.

After coming to the middle of the street he decided to show off before gathering of low-level demons and showed few of agile moves with his sword, showing his impressive skill and strength by wielding Rebellion with practiced ease. After Dante stopped in ready stance before his enemies, he sneezed.

And he heard loud crushes behind him.

At that moment he finally looked behind to check on his property. Apparently his house didn't survive warm-up with gang of low-level demons. And the last drop was his sneeze. Yeah, today definitely was not his day.

"You guys totally wrecked my shack! I haven't even named it yet!" At that Dante gritted his teeth and turn back to bunch of demons pointing at them with his sword. "I hope you've got enough money to cover all this!"

After this was the dance with which Dante was quite familiar. Cut few demons, shoot some of them and do that with style. There was one somewhat tough cookie at the end, but nothing that he couldn't handle. Annoying thing got away in the end but that wasn't really important. The problems had only just begun, according to Babylon-rip-off that he see rise at the city.

And the further he got the more annoying and fun demons became.

~~Dante POV~~

"Freaking dammit. Not bad for reunion party, Vergil. No food, no drinks, just two babes here, one of them shoot me in the head, other almost sucked my blood dry. And tons of demons to fight. Well at least big bro got one jig of really crazy party right." Thinking like that I slashed that one extremely irritating demon Doppelganger for a second time. That damn mirror trap, where is Vergil?!

Well, at least I finally can work out that trick Infinite Armory with Devil Arms. Who knew that there would be this much high-level demons?

First, there was Fido. He introduced himself differently but I don't care, Fido suits him just fine. Well, after I showed bad doggie its place he turned into triple nun-chucks. That was cool, I kinda felt myself like a Bruce Lee for a moment there, not bad. And cool. Like really cool, literally freezing cool. Dante, kung-fu master of Ice, tamer of Fido! That sounds little epic, but still could be more stylish. Meh.

Then there was a ton of different freaks for warm-up along with that clown. That frigging clown. I hate clowns. After meeting that annoying deceiving piece of shit for few times I REALLY hate clowns. If Vergil hasn't kicked his ass yet, then I'll do that - with pleasure. Just what some people can do to get one over Vergil and me? Well making ass out of himself apparently was just a cherry top on the cake. Other things I heard from Lady and some of them I just know from my own experience and studying about eldritch shit.

Then before first meeting with dear brother after a whole year since that damn mess in Kyoto, or somewhere else in Japan, who cares about little island' chinees, there was damn door. Damn door with two guardian numbskulls. Well kicking their asses was somewhat refreshing. But damn, that still didn't shut up these two idiots. Their voices are so annoying. Well, after I kicked asses of Numbskull Orange and Numbskull Blue I took them with myself. They're useful in fight, but so damn annoying when they're talking about some stupid stuff. Fortunately the deal was for them to shut up. And shut up they did! Oh, blessed silence. Sometimes I need to remind them of our agreement with one basic point from my side – No. Talking! – but, it could be worse.

On the way further found new shiny – demonic laser gun. Cool thing, though it shoots so slow. Meh, dropped this girl into my Infinite armory. I still prefer to dance with other two ladies – Ebony and Ivory.

After some prancing around tower innards somehow I found myself on the top. Cool view from up here, maybe watching fireworks in the city could be fun up here. I wonder if this is the reason why Vergil decided to stand here while demons spill out of tower. Well there are a lot of jackasses down there but I like demons even less then locals. So, it's decided – I kick Vergil's ass, go back into city, shoot a few dozen weak-ass demons and hope that Luigi's Pizza is still intact. I have whole two weeks before paying tab there.

And here he is! The most annoying big brother of century – Vergil! Well, at least he knows how to dance with Yamato. Though his witty banter skills didn't improve since the last time we met in Japan. Good thing that some of yakuza demon-wannabes used samurai swords. Even considering the fact that none of them were even close to my brother skill-level, I still managed to learn a couple of things to fight against samurais and the like. That includes Vergil. But damn, first part of my plan failed, so I got impaled on Rebellion like butterfly in collection. Well, I'm a lot cooler than any butterfly, but that still hurts. Hey, even if I have a healing factor that could deal with anything short of decapitation, that doesn't mean I enjoy getting my ass kicked, stabbed, burned, freezed and/or shooted.

Well, I underestimated him at our first meeting since reunion. And he got my part of mom's amulet! Hey, he has his own, just for that my prick of a brother definitely getting his ass kicked. Well he is gone to tinker with demonic tower. Geez and I thought my hobbies could get troublesome. Whatever flies his boat, I guess. But still, I was in a lot of rooms inside of tower, but didn't notice any suspicious ritual chambers or anything similarly interesting inside there. So most likely he is somewhere in the basement. Let's raid him! And who cares about stairs, when I have a shortcut? So, I jumped from the top a tower. In hindsight, that wasn't such a great idea.

Well, I got to the base of damn tower, eventually. But before that I got swallowed by demonic croco-whale. That thing was big! I wonder where Vergil gets all these cool pets – first Fido, now this one. Well we didn't get along with croco-whale – I cut myself out of his innards – but he still was kind of cool, for a giant flying demonic beast at least.

At the base once again met that chick, who shot me in my head. Well, that Lady didn't even introduce herself, so I just gone on ahead. And once again, stumbling around the tower I go. What a drag. But well, I found modified for demonic energy anti-tank rifle. Ooh, I like! And in one of the chambers there was a female demon. Damn, she was so hot. Maybe after that I will have a thing for redheads? But alas, she tried to suck my blood dry. So I shot the sexy bitch. But damn, after that she got turned into one sweet guitar - strings from magical lightning, stylish purple design and hidden blades transforming her into deadly scythe. I think I'm in love.

And now more running around! Sometimes this place is just annoying and nothing more. Especially when there are no demons to stave off some of my boredom. Damn, looks like I jinxed myself. Some one-eyed big cat-demon appeared in next big chamber. He was crying something about my pops, according to his tone they weren't best buddies after the last meeting between them. Stupid demons. If they were handed their asses on silver platter by daddy dearest why do they think that would be impossible for me? But still, this one was actually kind of tough. But looks like one of the sayings was right – be careful with pointy things or you could poke someone's eye out! Too bad kitty fled as soon as I blinded him.

Next was even more running around, though this time it was faster due to strange contraption that was kind of sucking my life outta me. In exchange it powered up my devil-trigger so much that I was using that effortlessly and it was stronger. Luckily, I was capable of acquiring pieces of life-force from slain lesser demons so it was cool. Still hurt like a bitch though. And that strange life-sucking thingy? Kicked it into bridge control to go further, I'm badass!

Next thing was kind of strange, though quite fun – playing chicken with demonic horse, pulling carriage full of weapons. Talk about Horse Power. After bridge that we were on fell down, we ended on some kind of demonic coliseum. Ave Caesar and so on… Well, horsy definitely know how to choose a place for real showdown. After that fight, which was really interesting thanks to horsy's slow-mo attacks I managed to absorb some of it powers to use slow-mo attacks myself. I will call that Quicksilver Style. I think that sounds cool. And Vergil would get nasty surprise next time we meet.

And soon I've met him! Well, he looks frustrated in his 'Underground Chamber for Evil Rituals'™. So, as a good brother (one of us has to be, or at least has to try to be) I will beat some of the good mood into him. And take my half of the amulet back. Damn you Vergil, greedy prick! But looks like I'm not the only one who can get his hands on new shiny thingies around here. He got himself a set of grieves and gauntlets made from silvery metal, that shines from designed cracks with white light. Well, my bro is no slouch when it comes to hand-to-hand combat, so with these things he was quite dangerous. Even though I was duking it out with him more seriously than before, it was a close one. We certainly did some number on each other. But before we could finish our today badass contest in my favor (Vergil need to brush up on his sense of humor before he could one-up me here!) we got some interlopers. That Lady, the one who shot me in my head, got here between us two. So it turned into three-way brawl with two tired half-demons and more or less fresh human. Well, it was more about her trying to off Vergil and piling me with him. Seriously, his haircut looks much stupidier than mine, so I'm much more stylish.

Well and at that moment I found out my personal reason for hating clowns. That damn prick Arkham appeared and kicked all of our asses while we were tired from battle. And just like that he turned into 'Evil Scheme Monologue'™. Seriously that situation is so cliché that I almost expected Superman to fly in and save the day. But that didn't happen. And although in difference with movies coming the fact that Arkham, who turned out to be Jester, didn't fail as soon as he finished talking about his 'Super-Evil Plan of Absolute Power and World Domination'™. No, after that me, Vergil and Lady tried to take him down together, but he kicked our asses. Again. And due to the workings of his 'Super-Evil Plan of Absolute Power and World Domination'™ the 'Underground Chamber for Evil Rituals'™ in which we fought turned into giant elevator. And yes he throws us out from the ride up.

After that I found myself close to entrance of tower. That frigging damn tall tower, filled to the brim with demons, traps and strange locking-moving-rearranging contraptions. Ascending this time wasn't so long because I already finished off almost all of the higher-tier demons and small-fries which are left aren't capable of stopping me. I'm so badass that they're barely slowing me down. On the way through tower I found Lady catching her breath in a library. Well, she was quite stubborn about her wish to deal with Jester and local demons' infestation. Too bad, this is my job. So we argued. Ended this with little scuffle. You know, half a dozen of grenades, few big missiles from her bazooka, few dozens of tiny scatter-missiles, few hundred of bullets from both sides, three quarters of library destroyed, well, yeah, we've finished warm-up for today. She was pretty nimble, but in the end I was the one who've got to move to deal with that mess. And she gave me her bazooka to deal with my troublesome brother.

And right now I'm dealing with some kind of shadow demon before going into demonic gates. I think demons of that type are called Doppelgangers, but I may be mistaken. That fella thinks he could be as awesome as me after turning into my look-a-like. Well, fuck him! And sesame, open shiny mirror… And another one… And one more and finisher! Finally I am standing before doorway to dad's homeland. Well, it's time to see if this place as shitty as rumors says.

~~End Dante's POV~~

~~Vergil's POV~~

After Arkham's betrayal I fallen quite far from platform and hit my head. Some random human in my place would scatter brains all over Temen-Ni-Gru, but I only blacked out for some time. Now there is no time to laze around, so I stood up and gone to the higher levels of tower. Maybe my fool of a brother would need about an hour to get to demonic portal that opened above this structure in the sky, but I spend last year learning everything that there is to know about this tower, its' layout, traps, inner mechanisms and inhabitants. So I should get there in ten minutes at most. That traitor would answer before me and Dante wouldn't beat me to this battle.

As I guessed getting to portal didn't take much time, as I used shortcut and found a little cache with vital stars, which allowed me to restore my powers before going to finish today's matter. Too bad I didn't have time to create them, as I found recipes for them just before it all started and some of needed tools in tower got broken. But I digress, now is time to deal with traitor and annoying family member. I've not seen Dante on the way up, so it's most likely that he's already inside. Looks like my foolish brother got a bigger head start then I thought.

After getting inside I looked around. Everything looked grey in twilight of underworld; ground was covered in dark ruins of unknown origins and stone pillar-like rocks of different height, dark-grey sky shrouded in low shroud of thick stormy clouds from which protrudes more dark rocks. Truly, an unusual sight... And, according to my knowledge, far from the most unusual down here. Dante and Arkham should be close – the portal was enchanted by Sparda, so opening should be close to the sword. And where is a sword, there is a traitor.

And after few minutes I found them. Even though his appearance changed drastically, his presence is still as corrupted and filthy as ever. The only difference is that now it shows his true nature – disgusting and deformed creature, covered in violet slime about eighteen feet in it height, with few tentacles that constantly move around. And Dante in the middle of the fight with it. To show that I joined the fight, I sliced off the tentacle with hand at the end of it while Arkham was reaching for my brother. Let's see how he would deal with two of us now.

~~End Vergil's POV~~

The battle in depths of hell raged on. Two white-haired brothers tore into one freshly-minted demon, previously human, who was bold enough to steal the power of their father. The might of Sparda was too much for simple mortal man to handle, so it warped his body in hideous form, decreasing it overall dexterity, though it allowed use for deceptive levels of speed and packed quite a punch. But it was nothing compared to mastery over demonic energy held by Sparda himself, so Arkham's fate was sealed.

Yet, he didn't give up. For almost whole hour he battled both sons of Sparda, releasing projectiles full of demonic energy, swiping furiously with his tentacles and forming smaller demons out of his body. Nothing would help him. As soon as his familiars corner one of brothers, other would help him out and together they would quickly destroy them with sword slashes. His projectiles were sniped out by Dante's twin pistols and summoned swords of Vergil. And swipes of his tentacles were dexterously dodged by quick dashes from Dante and short-distanced instantaneous teleportations of Vergil. And with every given opening two brothers would madly slash their enemy from different sides, until they pierce his body fully with their swords. They thrusted their swords with such strength that they flew out from opposite sides of demonic blob. After that they caught weapon of each other and showed that they're perfectly capable of masterful use of each other weapon of choice – o-katana and claymore. This was the limit of how far faulty yet sturdy demonic body could get Arkham even with energy of Sparda backing him up. And yet again, in rare show of unity, half-devil brothers made a final blow by charging two pistols to a limit of their capacity with their demonic energy and destroying Arkham's body with that.

After that demonic blob disappeared as if it never existed and there were two amulets and a sword where it was. Unfortunately they'd fallen to the deeper level of underworld. Dante and Vergil dived after them without a second thought. Each of the brothers managed to catch their own half of the amulet before landing on their feet into shallow river atop some big flat rock surrounded by inconspicuous ruins. Well, inconspicuous for denizens of hell and these two. For human any part of underworld looks quite creepy. And then Vergil took the sword of their father for himself. Power blinds and could even make brothers go against each other. Just like in this case. Even though they both were tired and ragged from countless battles with demons this day, they were prepared for another battle against each other.

That battle wasn't as long as previous one, though it was much fiercer. Brothers traded blow for blow, attacking each other as they were mortal enemies. They poured each drop of energy in their bodies to gain the upper hand in their stand-off. After some time brothers stood against each other, ready for the final strike, which would decide the end of their duel. And they run at each other preparing their swords for that one strike. Ten meters…

Nine…

Eight…

Seven…

Six…

Five…

Four…

Three…

Two…

One…

The big spray of blood from horizontal slash signifies the victor of today battle.

Vergil… fallen to his knees, the sword Force Edge falls from his weakened grip and get stuck into the ground. Dante won.

With portal closing Dante tried to convince his brother to come with him, but that didn't work out as Vergil trekked to the edge of their fighting ground. When Dante tried to get close to him he threatened him with his sword and tried to jump off.

Dante would have none of that.

Using his last remaining small vital star he gained a power boost. At least enough of a power boost for few seconds of using Quicksilver Style. That was all he needed to catch his brother off guard and clobber him over his head with the pommel of Agni.

"Well, let's hope my stupid stubborn brother wouldn't wake up on the way home… Although let's hope I didn't took out last of his brains with that strike." – Heaving Vergil over his shoulder Dante spoke his thoughts aloud.

"But I thought he is the brains of family." – Came the gruff voice from his right hand. Or more precisely, from head on the pommel of orange serrated sword, Agni.

"Do I need to remind you of our agreement or would you prefer I just toss you down there at once?" – At that sword wisely shut up and Dante continued his journey to the portal into the human realm. On the way out he took Force edge with in his left hand, holding Vergil with his right.

After few minutes of running Dante came to the portal together with his brother, who still didn't woke up.

"And that's good or else bro throw a fit, which wouldn't help us get our hides out of here" – Such were the thoughts of Dante as he stood before portal to outside of underworld. The shimmering orange structure was wildly pulsating, which means that portal is unstable, though Dante never was very good at mystic teachings, like his unconscious brother. So he didn't know that staying in Hell is better idea then jumping into unstable portal. Though, to be honest, even if he knew, he would still do the same thing.

He jumped right in without second thought with a loud "WOOOHOO!"

Dante… Enough said.

A/N: And here is a prologue to my Sekirei/Devil May Cry crossover. Why such a story? Well Sekirei is full of interesting female characters ready and WILLING to be a part of a harem, but alas there is exactly ZERO charismatic male characters. Wimps, jackasses, dumbasses and S-grade assholes who get their asses licked by A-grade and B-grade assholes. So, this story gets TWO super-charismatic badasses for the price of one and some twist which would unfold in later chapters. Ideas for harem and advices for story are welcomed, though I would NEVER add – 1) No.88, as I don't really like her brainless bimbo antics; 2) No.108. She is like, 8-years old at most, enough said; 3) Any male Sekirei and that includes Homura, and I don't care about the fact that he changes gender. Seriously he is like what, halfway through transformation? That means you will get guy with boobs, not cool, not cool at all. – Even if they would appear in this story, all this garbage will go to Minato.