The Blog of Dr. John H. Watson

I saw Anderson on my way to visit Sherlock, I passed him in the cemetery. I found a box of nicotine patches I think he dropped on his way to visit Sherlock. I remember all the times they bickered at each other and how horrible they could be. I don't know why he decided to visit, and it's really not my business, but I'm glad he did.

A Journal File

I was talking to Anderson today, he said he visited Sherlock's grave. Guess he wanted to make peace. I've thought about it before, but it seems wrong to pretend you're mourning over a stranger. Sherlock Holmes wasn't a colleague or a friend, he was a thorn in my side. He put us at risk every time he showed up. I can't stop thinking though, was it worth losing him? Letting him work with us was irresponsible and illegal, but I won't say he didn't help. I can't seem to fight of this twinge of guilt every time I think about his suicide. I was entirely responsible for bringing the accusations to the DI, if I hadn't spoken out, he might not have ever brought it up with the Superintendent. I know I did my duty, I know it was my responsibility to the citizens I serve, but I'll always wonder if Sherlock Holmes would be alive today if I'd let it be.
Sally Donovan

An unsent email

I visited his grave today. I finally got some time off, I've been worked to the bone lately. Lestrade gave me a box of nicotine patches to leave him, but I lost them on the way there. I didn't have much to say. I was surprised how much I actually missed him, even though he could be horrible, even though he was a nuisance. I respect what he tried to do. In a way, he was a bit like me; got into science for justice. It's still hard to see him, but I think it's getting better. I saw his friend John Watson while I was leaving. I don't think he expected to see me there. I didn't say anything, neither did he. What could I have said.
S. Anderson

Overheard at the water cooler

I haven't been able to get out and see Sherlock for quite a while. Ironic isn't it, I always saw him when I didn't really want to, and now, without his help, I'm too busy to visit. I gave Anderson an old box of nicotine patches for him. I don't need them anymore and I don't think Sherlock ever did. It's hard to explain. It's been long enough that I don't worry as much if I could have done anything to change it, but I still wonder if I did the right thing.
Greg Lestrade

In a well used, leather bound notebook, kept neatly, packed to the seams with entries, sticky notes and loose leaf

I shouldn't take such a risk as to watch my own tombstone. John would call it sentiment. It has surprised me to see who comes to pay respects, to make apologies. It's amazing what guilt will do to some people. When I return I do hope I will be able to make amends with my friends at Scotland Yard. As foolish as they were to play into the game, they did what they thought was right. I know Donovan and Anderson hold no malice towards me, they acted in the best interest of the public. I hope they will accept my forgiveness. I haven't been able to observe Greg Lestrade as closely as I would hope. It's a waste of energy to worry about him, but I wish he had not been forced to bring the matter to the superintendent. I admire the courage it took to pursue the accusations against me. I don't know if I will be able to adequately tell them how much I respect and admire all of them. John always knew how I felt about him, but I've never been able to convey it to people that, up until today, I've only considered colleagues. They're fools and lackeys but they're incredibly brave. SH