Don't own anything! Enjoy! Review! Should I continue this story?
Ally stands beside me as were waiting at the doors. I don't want to go it. Not at all. Tears are falling from my eyes and Ally's. She wasn't close with him so I'm not sure why she's so upset. I shouldn't have brought her here, I made her cry. "Why are you crying?" I whisper and she looks up into my tear filled eyes with hers. "I can't stand to see you cry... It just..." She trails off and my heart breaks into a million pieces. I wipe her tears and give her a small smile. "I'll be fine..." She nods, her eyes filling with tears again.
We walk inside the large room an all eyes turn to us. Ally looks down and I look at her. "Do you want me to take you home?" She shakes her head and I sigh. People start coming up to me, asking me how I am and how I'm feeling. "People are so annoying." I whisper to Ally when we're finally alone. "How do they think I'm feeling? I mean, really. I just want to be left alone. She sighs an stands up, grabbing my hand. "We're the last ones Austin.. C'mon.." I internally groan but grab her hand that she put out for me and walk with her. We walk up to the casket and I look down at his face, brushing my hand against his. He's in his army uniform, his one request before he died. I think of my memories with him and let out a laugh, it coming out as a sob instead.
My tear falls down to his face and I brush it away. I grab his hand and close my eyes. We disagreed a lot but I told him everything. He didn't like what I did, he thought I should do something more useful like he did. I'm going to. Two days ago, the day he died out there was two weeks ago, is when I made my decision. They tried to save him but nothing happened. No one knows that I'm doing this but they will when I leave. I got my letter back today. I leave for boot camp next week. "Austin..." Ally says and I look at her. She pulls me in for a hug and I squeeze her tight. "I'm sorry..." I laugh through my tears. "For what? You did nothing wrong." She pulls away and she looks down at the casket again.
"I know I didn't know you were well..." She starts and sighs. "But Austin has told me lots about you. He told me you used to fight but He never told me why but he loves you anyway and you loved him. You were brave. You were strong... You still are. You saved so many lives out there and I couldn't imagine what it would be like." She lets out a sobs and tears stream faster down my face. "You're still strong, you'll just be somewhere we can't physically be with you but you'll always be in our hearts and minds. Watch over Austin, stay with him... He needs you. He misses you. He loves you..." She hunches over the casket and I sob, pulling her in for a hug. "Ally..." I cry harder as she squeezes me tighter and I sigh, turning to him.
"I love you. I'll always miss you. I'll keep this necklace forever, wherever I go. I'll never forget you, you were like my best friend even though you left. Sometimes... Sometimes we fought but you couldn't have been any better than what you were and what you are. I'll never forget you and neither will anyone else. I w-wish... I wish that I was out there with you. I could've tried to protect you." Ally grabs my arm but I ignore her. "I was selfish. I should've done what you told me to. It would've been better for the both of us. We could've helped each other, we wouldn't have been alone. But I was selfish and I'm sorry. I wish I was out there to help you and protect you. I'll always take part of the blame for you ge-getting killed." I sob and Ally tries to calm me down but I shake her off. "If I wasn't so d*** selfish, you would be here right now. I'll never forgive myself but I can try to do what you always asked of me. I love you and I know you might have thought I didn't while you were here because I didn't show it but... I did and I realize it even more now that you're gone. I love you." Ally grabs my hand I let out another sob and so does she. "Austin, it's not your fault." She cries and I hug her tighter. "I wish I could believe that..." She sighs and squeezes me tighter before we're interrupted. "I'm sorry, we have to take him now..." I pull away from Ally and sigh, looking at him one more time. "I love you..." I whisper and place a kiss on his cheek, my tear falling on his face. I wipe it off and give him a sad smile. "You'll always be my hero." I solute him and back away, grabbing Ally's hand.
"I'm really sorry I asked you to come Alls... I just- you're the only one who I would want to comfort me... Who would understand." She squeezes my hand and looks up at me. "It's fine. I'm glad you called me." I open the limo door for her and we both go to the back and sit. "You shouldn't have to see me like this..." She rolls her eyes, trying to lighten the mood. "You're fine. I understand." I roll my eyes too. "You ready for your speech?" She whispers and I play with her fingers. "Yeah... It'll be nice. Like a closure, I guess." She pulls me in for another hug and I laugh but hug her back anyway. "You're so brave..." She whispers and I can hear tears in her voice again. "Ally, please stop crying. It makes me want to cry..." She laughs and pulls away, I wipe her tears. "How'd you know I was crying?" She asks and I smirk. "I know you like the back of my hand." She raises her eyebrows. "Is that a challenge?" She asks and I nod. "Favorite color?" I roll my eyes. "Red." She sighs. "Favorite food?" I raise my eyebrows and laugh. "Pickles." We go on like this for the rest of the ride, I even got her middle name right. "Last question. You get it, you win. You don't get it, I win. Okay?" I roll my eyes. "Sure." She nods and then blushes, looking away. "Crush?" I freeze. I've never asked her because in all honest, I don't want to feel the rejection. I shrug my shoulders. "I don't know. You win..." She smiles and grabs my hand, pulling me out of the limo.
We get in the church and it's almost over. I just have to make my speech. I take a deep breath and walk over to the podium. "Hey guys..." They all are crying or looking at me in pity. "This man, this amazing man, could not have been better. He helped me through everything and he helped my mom too. He served for our country, he fought for us, gave up his life for us. He couldn't have been better, really. We used to fight, but that didn't mean anything and it doesn't mean anything now. He's still the best man in my life. I love you dad..." I squeeze my eyes shut and let out a sob. "I-I'm sorry that I didn't help you. I should've joined, just like you told me to. I'm sorry I let you get killed out there dad." I wipe my tears but more keep coming. "I love you." I look at everyone here for my dad. Almost everyone is crying, Ally's crying the hardest. Great.* that doesn't make this easier at all. I take a deep breath. "I know... I know I said I was going to sing a song but... That's not what my dad wanted for me. He wanted me to be strong, he wanted me to be like him so, I'm not singing today. He didn't like what I did so, it's over." I let another sob out as almost everyone in the crowd gasps or murmurs to one another. "I'm doing what my dad wanted. I'm following in his footsteps. So, I applied to join the military the day my dad died. I'm leaving in a week." I hear a shriek, most likely coming from my mom and I hear footsteps coming toward me.
"Austin, this is ridiculous. I k-know your father just died but... I forbid this. I'm not letting you get killed! You're all I have left!" She wraps her arms around my neck and I sigh. "This is about dad. I-I need to make it up to him. I just let him get killed out there. I'm finally realizing that he was right." She shakes her head but I sigh. "Let's go." I nod at the men who took his casket in and we follow them out. "Where's Ally?" I ask my mom and she looks up at me, tears in her eyes. "She's probably outside. She said she needed some fresh air." I sigh and step away from my mom, walking outside.
I look around and she Ally on a bench, crying and holding her sides. I walk up to her but she turns away, crying harder. "No." She whispers and I sigh. "No. Austin no." She says and I grab her hand. "Don't touch me!" She yells and I step back. "I feel like I'm gonna throw up." She says and I turn around, moving the small bag my mom brought for tissues. I hand it to her and she takes it, walking away angrily. I see her kneel on the grass at the park across from the church and I think she throws up into the bag. I jog across the street to her. "Hey..." I kneel next to her. "Get off! I hate you! I hate you, I hate you, I hate you! You only brought me here to tell me you're leaving me in a week! You can die out there! And what? You're just gonna leave me here alone?! I have no one Austin! Only Dez and Trish! You know that I need you! Why...?" She breaks down again and falls to the ground, her hands breaking her fall. She stays in that position, her hands flat across the ground. Five minutes later, she finally speaks again. "You know what?" She asks and I sigh. "Goodbye Austin. This is the last time you'll ever see me. I g-guess it just wasn't meant to work. Everything." That's the last thing she says to me before calling Trish to get her mom to pick her up. I try to talk to her but she refuses to speak to me. It wasn't meant to be. It wasn't meant to work. I sit on the ground, in my suit and put my head to my knees. I cry and cry for hours. Well, it felt like it.
"Austin, he needs to get buried. Let's go." My mom tells me and I stand up, not bothering to wipe my tears. Everyone stares at me in pity or shock. One of the two. No one speaks to me. I'm glad, I need to think. We all put our roses on his casket and I smile one last time at the casket before they lower it to the ground. I stare at it, frozen until everyone's gone. My dads gone. Forever. He's never coming back. I bring my hands to my hair and yank on it. I fall to the ground and completely broke down. My heart actually hurts. I lost my dad. My moms mad. Ally hates me. I feel so... Alone.
I knew they wouldn't be happy but I thought they'd help me through this. It's hard enough for me as it is. I just lost my father. It's my fault he's dead right now! I could've been there! I could've saved him but I was so fricken absorbed in myself that I let him get killed. So I'm going. Whether Ally wants me to. Whether my mom wants me to. My dad wants me to and that's what matters.
I sit, sobbing on the floor before a man asks me to move. They finished putting the dirt and grass over my dads casket and I'm right in the way. I nod. "Hey dad..." I walk over to his own personal spot in the ground. "I'm going to fight for our country. For our people. Most importantly, I'm going to fight for you." I sigh, looking at his picture on the tombstone. "I know it took me so long to realize. But I did realize it. Ally left. Mom left without me, so I'm here alone. Well, no. I'm with you." I smile and laugh through my tears. "I know we fought a lot dad but... You know I love you, right?" I touch his name, engraved on the stone. "You're amazing you know... You did something that was unbelievable. I'll never be as good as you. I'll never make up for everything I did to you or the fact that... If we were out there together, you'd be with me right now. I'll try though." I sit down next to the tomb and sigh. "Soldier A. Moon. Yours sounds better. Soldier M. Moon." I lay down and start to laugh as rain starts to drip down.
"Remember when I used to just in the puddles to get you wet? And you'd come back and jump in the puddle to get me wet too?" I look up into the sky. "Or what about when I turned eleven and it was Christmas? You weren't there so I stayed in my bed, not opening my presents until you had to come get me. That was definitely the best Christmas gift ever..." I look down at the whistle around my neck. "I'll wear this at all times dad. I'll take good care of it for you. One day I'll be with you. I'll give it back." I laugh and sigh, pulling off my wet coat. I pull off my shirt from underneath too and laugh. "We used to dance together out in the rain, no shirts on." I say and spin in a circle, laughing to myself. "If you can hear me... I hope you're dancing with me. Even though I don't know... I feel like you're with me." I smile at the stone. "It's not the same without you." I say and I sit down again. "Mom would probably be yelling at us right about now. Telling us to come inside to drink our hot chocolate she made us." The tears come again and I roll over.
"I know we stared fighting these past couple of years but..." I roll back over to look at the stone. "I've always loved you dad. I hope you know that. I'm so sorry..." I try to hold my break down for when I'm done. "The last words I said to you were... I hate you... I don't hate you dad." I sob a little and stand up. "I don't hate you, you get that right?" I sit back down, they way he used to on Christmas morning or whenever he played with me. "I never have. I actually... I actually hate myself right now." I whisper and I close my eyes. "I'd trade anything in the world to tell you how much I regret saying those words. For not doing what you told me to. What you told me to do was right and I'm so sorry that I did that. I love you. I love you, I love you, I love you. Nothing will ever change that, okay?" I sit in silence before I jump at the sound of my phone. "One minute dad." I say and sigh.
I try to collect my thoughts and I stand up. "Hello?" I ask and the person sighs. "Austin?" It's Ally. "Ally?! Oh my gosh Ally. I'm sorry I didn't tell you. Please. Please I need you. My mom is mad at me. My dads gone. I need you. You're the only one I have and I know I'll be far away but to have you believe in me and what I choose..." She sighs. "Austin, please. The only reason why I'm calling is because your mom is in a panic because she can't find you." My heart shatters what seems like the last time it can handle. "Oh..." I whisper and we sit in silence. "So... Where are you?" I shake my head. "I just want to be alone." She groans. "Austin, please." I let out a sob and shake my head again. "No." My voice cracks and she groans again. "What is with you today?!" She yells and I break down again. I hear her voice on the speaker but I can't make out what she's saying. I hang up the phone and throw it toward the street, then plop next to my dads tomb again.
"Hey, sorry about that..." I whisper and I play with my fingers. "I wish you were here. I'd be asking you for advice on Ally." I laugh through my tears, imagining what he would say. "Yeah, Ally Dawson. The same Ally since forever. I'm not over her yet but she's obviously over me now..." I sigh and look up at the now dark and cloudy sky. "We'd do this every night together. Just sit and watch the stars. Well, not in the rain but..." I sigh, running my fingers through my soaked hair. I'm gonna visit you everyday I'm home. Now that I'm going to boot camp... It'll be awhile but I'll talk to your whistle if I need to talk to you. It'll probably be often." I grab the necklace and blow into it twice. He used to do that when ever he came home. "Love you dad." I place my hand over where his casket is and close my eyes.