Chapter 1

I began my speech with " I Kaitlyn Fairchild am so honored to be recieving this award tonight," I waved happily to the crowd of fans and warroirs below me, "Throughout the years this war between good and evil has brought hardship sorrow to so many families. Along the way I have lost so many good friends and so many wonderfull warriors. This is a war that can never be won but must be fought for all eternity. I am so pleased to have fought along side so many amazing warriors. I am even more pleased that they have elected me as Best Shadowhunter of the Year."

Oh, please," an annoying familiar voice cut into my reverie, "There is no and there never will be a Best Shadowhunter of the Year award," finished Isabelle.

"Yeah, Izzy's right. That's the whole point of hunting in the shadows. No reward. Our only reward is the knowledge that we saved a helpless mundanes life." said Alec in his superior tone. Being an older brother he tended to use that tone with us often.

"Sheesh. Can't a girl dream around here?" I replied before leaving the room. Obviously my hopes and dreams were not appreciated here. As usual the institute was empty except for the three of them and Hodge, the institute proffesor and our only true caretaker.

As young shadowhunters we spent our days training and staying locked up in the institute. Maryse and Robert Lightwood my adoptive parents and the true parents of Izzy and Alec were almost never around. They were always leaving for Idris and if they were home they were busy calling the Consul and council memebers about Idris business. Though I loved Alec and Izzy and considered them to be my brother and sister I spent most of my days alone. Each day I spent and hour or so exploring the rooms of the institute., and the rest of my day playing the piano and reading. Today I felt different. I felt anxious. I felt the sickning feeling in my stomache. The face of a boy with beautiful gold hair and sad eyes stared at me. Then a whisper from far away said Jace Herondale. Suddenly it was all gone. It had happened to me alot lately. I would see random clips. Sometimes I would see a scene and it would happen the next day. It was almost as if I could see the future. Of course I hadn't told anyone. I was afraid of what they might think.

Under my feet I felt a familiar rumbling. It was the portal, this ment that Maryse and Robert had come back from Idris. Just as any kid would of done I went rushing into the library to meet them. When I ran into the room I couldn't believe my eyes. There standing in front of me was the golden haired boy from my vision. "Welcome to the institute," I said my voice dripping with sarcasm, before giving a curtsey and leaving the room. Once out in the hall I felt bad for being so rude. I was just so surprised I put up my invisible wall. Before mom could come to find and scold me I ran to my room. In my room I began to feel bad for the young boy. He probably was expecting hospitality, not a complete lack of manners. I was so exhausted that I fell into a light nap.

When I awoke, my hair was shooting out everywhere, and the clock read 6:40 p. ! It was almost time for dinner. I quickly ran a brush through my hair and smoothed out my clothes. I sternly told myself not to be rude to the new boy at dinner. I then began my decent to the kitchen.

When I reached the kitchen Jace was standing there with Izzy and Alec. As I entered I a gave a loud cough to announce my presence. Izzy and Alec both gave me looks of disappointment, while Jace stared at me curiously. Knowing I had gotten his at attention I introduced myself, "I don't think I have properly introduced myself. I am Kaitlyn Fairchild." I said this in my most sincere tone as to not seem sarcastic. Jace then stuck out his hand and said, "I am Jonathan Christopher Wayland." At that I whispered," Jace,"under my breath.

"What did you say?" Asked Jonathan.

"I said Jace. It would be a good nickname for you."

"It sounds nice," he said with a smile.

At that, Maryse looked at me with pride. It was such a motherly gesture I couldn't help but smile back. As mom and I shared our moment of happiness Jace almost cringed at the site. It was not a cringe of disgust,but more of a cringe of sadness. I knew the feeling well.

During dinner, everyone stayed quite quiet. I decide to begin some conversation with a question I knew could bring a lively conversation to a group of shadowhunters.

"So, I want to know what your prefered weapon is Jace Wayland," I said in a slightly flirtatious tone.

Jace replied, " Weapon of choice is a seraph blade. What would your weapon of choice be?"

"Well, I prefer to use a dagger. Izzy loves her electrum whip and Alec is passionate about the crossbow, but I like to be different."

"Why a dagger"

"I always felt like a dagger represents slight of hand. You have to be so sneaky. You have to make that demon believe that they can trust you, so that you may get close enough to kill them. I feel like slight of hand and untrust fit perfectly with me. I have seen others trick people, I unfortunately have experience," I said in a slightly nostalgic tone,"People do it all the time. They bring you close. Make you believe that you can trust them as a friend or family memeber. Then they turn around and stab you in the back." I said coldly. This conversation had taken an unexpected turn and was leading me down memory lane. A lane I had no want to visit. After a moment of silence I got up from the table and began to walk back to my room.

"Kaitlyn where are you going? Dinner isn't over yet," said mom.

"The onions are making me slightly teary. I am going to head back to my room." I replied curtly and rushed out.

I had no intention of going back to my room however. I went to the music room. When I played the piano the only thing I thought about was the cords and the beat, no memories resurfaced and no akward conversations occured. I was so in to the music I didn't even here Jace walk into the room. But when the door slammed shut loudly I looked up to see Jace standing above me. A mix of emotion all over his face. He was sad and currious but most of all he was longing. He was longing for something he would never have again. A family of his own. I had seen that look in the mirror so many times that I had memorized it.

"Kaitlyn, what have I done to make you hate me?" He said is voice hurt.

"I don't hate you. Why would you think that?"

"Today, at dinner we were having such a wonderful conversation, and suddenly you rushed out with some exuse of onions burning your eyes."

"Look, it isn't you it's me."

"That's what people say in books. It usually ends up being the other persons fault. Can't you just tell me what went wrong."

"Jace," I said tenderly,"You did nothing wrong. Talking about daggers, my whole speech about stabbing people in the back It all brings back memories I don't wish to remember. I wasn't always a Lightwood. My life before had a tragic ending."

"What happened? Where your parents killed too?"

"No. I had everything I could want. I had a mother a sister, but no father because he had left shortly after I was born. I never really wanted a father anyway so it was quite fine. But then one day that dream of a life I had was taken away from me. We had just gotten home from the park and I was frolicking around the foyer dancing and laughing. My mother was with my younger sister,Clary, helping her unbutton her coat. Just then, our door broke in. A frightfull demon strode into the house. He was unlike any demon I had ever seen in any of my mother's old books. He had no nose and his face was white as paper. He looked almost human other than that and his lack of hair. My mother froze but only for a moment. She threw her dagger at the demon, but he deflected it easily. My mother than took Clary into her arms and looked over at me 'Be strong' was all she said before vanishing into thin air. The demon then turned to me he tortured me for no reason at all. Then he said a curse I will never forget. He preformed the killing curse. Odly though I did not feel a thing. For some reason he just writhed in pain. After that night he left me in my house, and hasn't returned since. I was then kindly taken in by the Lightwoods and have lived here ever since." While I was talking he had come to sit next to me on the piano bench. He was so close that I could feel the warmth coming off of his body.

"You could of told me this you know," He said.

"Well, it's not exactly something you mention at a nice dinner." I replied in a whisper.

"I want you to know I will always be there for you. You probably don't trust me at the moment, but I will prove myself to you. I promise I will never turn around and stab you in the back," he said so tenderly that it almost hurt my heart to hear.

What hapoened next was as much a surprise to me as it was to him. I leaned forward and kissed Jace. This kiss was the msot amazing thing I had ever felt. His lips were as soft as clouds and he smelled like sweet honey and flowers. Being my first kiss I had to say it was the msot extraordinary kiss I had ever had. After kissing for what felt like hours but was only probably seconds. I pulled back realizng what I had done. I apologized before jumping out of my seat and running for the door. I ran to my room with my head down so embarrassed of what had happened.