Summary: Reid gets drunk for the first time in his life and it's memorable for everyone but him. ONESHOT
Pairings: Reid/JJ (friendship) Not overwhelmingly so though.
Author's Note: Let's just say that someone got a little addicted to Criminal Minds and found her way back onto here. If anyone's wondering I thought I would say that any previous stories I have started but not finished are on hiatus, however I will leave them up for a while longer in case I get inspiration. Otherwise they will be deleted within the next month or so.
Anyway, I hope you enjoy my first story for Criminal Minds.
First Time For Everything
It had been a long, long case. Their unsub had targeted well-built and successful men in their late twenties, and his murder count had reached a horrifying twenty-six before they caught the guy. Correction, before they caught the girl.
Seventeen days since they arrived in Boston and the jet left early the next morning. Reid would have been more than happy just to get on the flight as soon as they caught their unsub, but the rest of the team had other plans.
"Come on, Pretty Boy," Morgan whined, chucking him the only shirt in Dr Spencer Reid's entire wardrobe that he deemed acceptable for a night out. "We've all been working like slaves for the past two and a half weeks, you can't deny us one night on the town."
Reid snatched the shirt off the bed and began to fold it. "Hey, I never tried to stop you guys. I'm just saying 'one night on the town' doesn't really seem like my idea of fun."
Morgan shook the younger man by the shoulders. "Have you ever even got drunk, Reid?"
"Actually it's a common misconception that excessive drinking of alcohol leads to-"
He took that as a no. "Please kid, I'm begging you. One night of fun, you only have to stay an hour or so," Morgan pleaded with him. "Besides, you know that JJ will refuse to have any proper fun without you there…"
After considering it for a moment, Reid rolled his eyes, acknowledging defeat.
"One hour, then I'm back to my books," he said, sternly, unfolding the plain, navy shirt.
His roommate grinned mischievously, clapping him on the back. "Atta boy, knew you'd come round." Reid let out a grunt, reluctantly changing his shirt.
"Man, that kid can drink!" Rossi exclaimed, before downing his fifth shot. He, Hotch and Blake had been watching the young genius as his IQ began to diminish more and more with each drink. Morgan was surrounded by a heap of half naked girls, whilst JJ fended off yet another horny guy's advances as she waited for the team's next round of drinks.
"Didn't Derek say something about Spencer never being drunk before?" Blake added, slurring her every 'S' in that sentence.
"I'm pretty sure that statement is no longer accurate," Hotch added, also looking slightly worse for wear. The usual bags under his eyes were even more prominent, and his eyes itself were starting to look a little bloodshot. The case had been toughest on their Unit Chief, who had come under fire from Strauss who questioned the team's ability to actually get the job done. "You know what guys, I think this is me done for the night."
Hotch reached for his wallet but Rossi waved him away. "It's on me tonight. See you on the plane tomorrow." Hotch nodded his thanks before turning to walk to the door, patting JJ on the shoulder as she carried over the drinks.
"I see the boss has given in." JJ let out a laugh as she handed her two seniors a drink.
At this point, Blake stood up and tried to drag Rossi to the dancefloor. "Ooo, come on, I love this song!"
Rossi looked desperately at JJ who was trying and failing to conceal her amusement, just as Blake half collapsed into Rossi. "Looks like we need to get this one back to the hotel."
"You go," the blonde laughed. "I'll stay and keep an eye on Spence, it doesn't look like Morgan will be doing much of that." After a quick glance at Morgan flexing his biceps, Rossi nodded.
"Good luck, I think you're going to need it." Rossi offered words of encouragement as he gently lead Blake out of the bar. Scouring the room for Spencer, JJ sighed. His drink tally must be getting into the double figures by now. Sure enough, she found him in the middle of the dancefloor. Dancing.
This was going to be a long night.
"Hey, Spence?" she tapped him from behind, making sure to steer clear of his waving arms. It would be safe to say that JJ now understood why he refused to dance when he was sober. "Is it time for bed now?"
Reid waved his arms wildly in front of her face. "No. No bed. No sleep," he slurred, sounding like a petulant child who'd had one too many helpings of Christmas pudding.
The smell of alcohol was so strong that JJ thought she was going to need a liver transplant just from being within such close proximity.
"How many drinks have you had?"
Reid looked down guiltily at the floor. "Only a couple…"
Of course. Only a couple. Liar. "Really, Spence?" she sighed.
Choosing not to answer, instead he grabbed the blonde's hand and began spinning round in a circle. "Come onnnnnn Jayjee, have some fun!"
Fun. She thought. This was supposed to be fun? Oh if only he could see himself now.
"No Spence! Spence, please stop! I think I'm going to be sick!" JJ maybe not have been anywhere near as drunk as Reid, but she had had her fair share of drinks, and she knew all this spinning was not good if she wanted to keep down the pizza from earlier. With Reid not showing any signs of stopping, she did the only thing she could think of and stuck her leg out to stop him, mid flow.
They collapsed in a heap on the dancefloor, tangled up in eachother. "Jaaaaayjaaaaay, why did you stop me? We were having fun!" the fully grown man pouted. Yes, you would probably be forgiven for not believing this man was also in his early thirties.
They had gotten quite the bit of attention as the pair tumbled to the floor. Through the one eye that wasn't covered by Reid's armpit, JJ caught sight of Morgan, who shook his head at them before turning back to his girls.
"Sir, madam, I'm going to have to ask you to leave." One of the bartenders said to the pair of FBI agents as Spencer tried once more to scramble up off the floor, and JJ. The bartender held out an outstretched hand to the blonde which she took gratefully and heaved herself off the grim floor. After a few more attempts, Reid eventually made it into a standing position.
He waggled his finger right in the man's face, the other hand reaching into his pocket for his badge. "Ask us to leave? I'll have you know that WE, are-"
"-leaving. We are leaving, and we're very sorry for any trouble we may have caused." JJ stepped in quickly. The last thing she needed was having to deal with headlines involving drunk FBI agents. She grabbed the finger that was still pointed in the man's face and dragged Boy Wonder to the exit faster than he could even process, especially in his severely intoxicated state. They were safely outside breathing the cool air before he yanked his hand away.
"Aw Jayjaay, you're no fun anymore!" he pouted once more. JJ was pretty sure that she saw him stomp one of his feet in a fit of childish defiance before his became pretty unsteady on his feet. He opened his mouth to argue once more, but instead fell quickly onto his hands and knees, throwing up violently on the side walk.
Ignoring the stench and deciding to be thankful he wasn't throwing up over her, JJ walked closer and pulled his growing hair out of his face. "There there, Spence. Let it all out," she comforted, stroking her best friend's hair. It took fifteen minutes before the retching stopped and he wiped his mouth with his sleeve. JJ swore that it was starting to get a little lighter in the sky.
"I'm sorry, Jayje," Reid said miserably as he dragged himself to his feet for the second time that night.
"Don't be silly, how about we just get you to bed for a couple of hours, eh?" JJ wrapped an arm around his waist and he leaned his weak frame into her. It took a little while for her to half carry Reid back to the hotel, he wasn't half heavy for a pretty skinny guy.
She sat him in bed and pulled off his Converse before tucking him in under the covers. She set out two paracetemol and a glass of water beside his bed before bending over and kissing him on the forehead. "Love you, Spence." She murmured softly, before turning and leaving.
It wasn't until she reached the door that she heard the barely audible, "Love you Jayje." And she left with a smile.
The team spent the entire plane journey recounting every shameful thing Reid had done last night, in the loudest voices possible.
Needless to say, Dr Spencer Reid was not getting drunk again in a hurry.
Author's Note: Hope you enjoyed, since this was very spur of the moment and just a random two hour's worth of spontaneous work. If the response is good then I may working on some other things.
Have a great week, my loves.