Kitchen Chaos: A Day in the Life of the Outer Senshi.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Sailor Moon characters.
Note: This story was inspired by a chapter or two of the story The Odd Adventures of Haruka, Michiru, and Setsuna by Lady Grizabella. It's an absolute hoot if you haven't read it. I thought up something similar but I wanted to toss Hotaru into the mix.
"Are you feeling any better Michi?" Haruka Tenoh gently asked her lover, Michiru Kaioh.
"A little bit, my love, but I'm still pretty tired." Michiru replied groggily. Michiru had been sick with the flu for the last few days, and was bedridden. The first few days she could barely do much more than lie in bed and groan, her fever raging. The fever had gone down and Haruka, their roommate Setsuna Meioh, and their daughter Hotaru Tomoe had managed to get Michiru to drink some water and eat a little broth that they had heated in the microwave. She was still pretty tired, but they had managed to get her to go to the bathroom and walk around for short intervals.
"Please don't make a fuss over me Ruka. I'll be fine, really. I just need my rest." Michiru's voice trailed off at the last part, and she drifted off into a deep sleep.
Haruka kissed her lover on the lips, tucked her in, and left the room, turning the lights out as she left. "Sleep well, my love." She called out softly as she pulled the door closed.
She went downstairs and slumped down in a chair opposite Setsuna who sat there reading a book. It was still early in the afternoon and Hotaru was still at school. Outside, one of the coldest winters in recent memory lingered on.
"How is Michi today?" Setsuna asked with a concerned look as she closed her book.
"Her fevers gone down a bit, and she's walking around a bit more, but she's still really out of it." Haruka replied, closing her eyes and leaning back in her chair.
"Maybe tomorrow she'll be a bit better so we can get her to eat something more substantial than broth. She ate her toast this morning without any problems." Setsuna ventured hopefully.
"Yeah that's true." Haruka said.
"Speaking of substantial food, it's your turn to pick up Hotaru from school, and dinner as well." Setsuna remarked.
Haruka groaned inwardly. Michiru usually did most of the cooking around the house. Setsuna and Haruka's cooking skills were limited to toast, pop tarts, and whatever they could open from a can and pop into the microwave. As a result, the three of them had been subsisting on take out food for the last several days, and truth be told they were pretty sick of it.
Haruka's face suddenly brightened. "I've got an idea. Why don't we get some stuff from the supermarket tomorrow and cook up a proper meal. We'll follow the instructions from one of Michiru's cookbooks and I'm sure we'll get it right this time." She beamed at Setsuna who stared back with a look of apprehension.
"You do remember what happened the last few times don't you?" Setsuna remarked dryly. There was the infamous macaroni and cheese incident from several months ago for one. The two of them had tried to make homemade macaroni and cheese in an effort to prove to Michiru that the two of them weren't totally inept in the kitchen. The end result was an overcooked mess that resembled, and tasted like, packing material. Michiru had nearly killed them both when she saw the mess they had made of her kitchen. Hotaru had, fortunately, been spared, as she was over at Usagi's spending time with Chibi-Usa.
The next incident she was there for. Haruka and Setsuna had tried to cook some hamburgers. "How hard could it be?" Haruka had said at the time. The result was that the four of them had been severely ill with food poisoning. Michiru barred them from her kitchen until they took a few lessons from Makoto. Hotaru didn't speak to either of them for days.
They tried to take lessons from Makoto, but they made such a mess of that, not to mention Makoto's kitchen, that they had fled in terror from an enraged Makoto who had to be calmed down by the rest of the Inners. Ami thought that Makoto would need a sedative. Michiru had given up at this point.
None of this had appeared to deter Haruka in the slightest as she was looking up recipes in a cookbook and making up a grocery list.
"This is going to end in tears, I just know it." Setsuna sighed and resumed reading.
The next day.
Michiru was feeling a bit better and had managed to eat some more toast and some juice that Haruka and Setsuna had brought her.
"We're going to have a bit of a surprise for you later today." Haruka promised with a grin. Setsuna tried with an effort to keep her expression neutral.
"Really, what kind of surprise?" Michiru asked, intrigued.
"We can't tell you, it would spoil the surprise." Haruka grinned even wider. Setsuna opened her mouth to speak, but shut it quickly when Haruka glared at her.
"Don't I get a hint?" Michiru asked with a slight pout.
"Nope. But don't worry you're going to like it. I guarantee." Haruka kissed Michiru lightly on the lips and left the room, pulling Setsuna behind her.
"Be well." Setsuna said as Haruka closed the door. Michiru shrugged and closed her eyes and drifted back to sleep.
"Ok, here's the plan. I'll go get the groceries, while you go get Hotaru from school." Haruka was nearly bouncing up and down with excitement.
"Maybe we can get Hotaru to help us?" Setsuna ventured. At least we would have another levelheaded person in the kitchen, she thought.
"Nah. I'm sure we can handle it ourselves. Besides she's probably got a ton of homework to do anyway." Haruka replied.
"Okay, if you say so." Setsuna replied. Now, if I was a smart person, I would just take Hotaru out for dinner, and leave Haruka to her own devices. She thought, and then dismissed it. No, I couldn't do that to her. She is my friend, insane though she may be. Besides who would save Michiru from her? Setsuna sighed. It was annoying to have a conscience sometimes.
A little while later Haruka was busy in the kitchen digging out pots and pans and getting everything ready, when she heard Hotaru and Setsuna come into the house.
"Haruka-papa?" Hotaru called out.
"In the kitchen, princess." Haruka replied happily. She was whistling a merry tune as Hotaru and Setsuna walked into the kitchen. Hotaru took one look at he grocery bags and the pots and pans cluttering the place and whispered; "Uh oh."
"What was that dear?" Haruka was smiling as she turned around. She had a saucepan in her hand.
"I said what are you up to?" Hotaru asked, trying to keep an innocent expression on her face. Inwardly her heart started to beat faster.
"We're going to cook dinner for you and Michiru-mama. We've got some chicken and rice and some vegetables. Not to mention some pie and ice cream for desert. Doesn't that sound yummy?" Haruka was grinning while Setsuna tried to keep her face hidden by looking through the grocery bags looking for the aforementioned pie and ice cream.
"It sounds great, Haruka-papa." Hotaru smiled on the outside while on the inside alarms were going off. She remembered the macaroni incident a bit. She had come home that evening after Mr. Tuskino had dropped her off, and Haruka had told her that there was some leftover macaroni and cheese in the fridge. Setsuna was nowhere to be found, and Michiru was in her room with the door locked and a big sign reading 'Go Away! Especially Haruka!' stuck to the door. She had shrugged and gone into the kitchen, which she noted had been freshly scrubbed clean. She opened the fridge to reveal a Tupperware dish that held a substance that vaguely resembled macaroni and cheese. Hotaru had grimaced and reached for the peanut butter and jelly instead.
Unfortunately she remembered the hamburger incident all too well. Especially the parts where she alternated between rolling around in severe pain, wishing she was dead, while clutching her tummy, and running to the bathroom. A lot. She had never actively contemplated murdering Haruka-papa, or Setsuna-mama before that point. The thought had given her a lot of comfort at the time. She had spent that night in bed rolling around in pain while occasionally screaming 'Death Ribbon Revolution!' until she passed out. The world was still there when she crawled out of bed the following afternoon.
"Um, can I help?" Hotaru asked tentatively.
"Well Setsuna and I figured that you had a lot of homework to do. Besides I'm sure Setsuna and I can handle it." Haruka replied. Setsuna was still poking through the grocery bags.
"I don't have any homework today actually. I had a free period because one of my teachers was ill. I went into the library and did my homework there. Besides Makoto has been teaching me how to cook, so I can be a big help to you." Hotaru stated with a smile.
Setsuna looked up at this announcement. "Makoto has been teaching you to cook? Since when?" She asked in amazement.
"For a few months now. I wanted to surprise Michiru-mama on her birthday by cooking dinner for her." Hotaru stated. She had actually been taking some basic martial arts instruction from Makoto for several months now, usually on weekends. After the hamburger incident, Hotaru had begged her for cooking lessons as well. Makoto relented after awhile (not many people could resist Hotaru's best puppy dog eyes expression) and started teaching her. Hotaru was fast becoming a good cook, much to Makoto's delight.
Haruka stared at her in wonder. "Ok then kiddo. Let's see what you can do." She said finally.
Hotaru clapped her hands excitedly. "Great! Let me change out of my school uniform and I'll be back down in a few minutes." Hotaru ran upstairs to change, leaving a visibly impressed Haruka and Setsuna in her wake.
"What happened to the shy, nervous, little girl we took in a few years ago?" Haruka asked.
"I think she grew up on us." Setsuna replied.
Hotaru came back downstairs 10 minutes later. She had changed into a pair of blue jeans, purple sweater, and white socks. She put on an apron and turned to face Setsuna and Haruka. "Ok, here's what we'll do first."
Things started to go wrong almost from the very start. Haruka and Setsuna's approach appeared to involve turning everything onto a high temperature and going to watch TV for several minutes. No wonder the macaroni and cheese looked like foam insulation. Hotaru thought with a sigh. She convinced them that it was a good idea to follow the instructions in the cookbook on how to prepare rice and vegetables. Bring water to boil, add rice, cover and simmer for 15 minutes without removing the cover, as Haruka did at one point, thus ruining the batch. Hotaru grumbled, tossed out the batch and tried again.
Hotaru prepared the chicken herself to make sure that the meat wouldn't be undercooked and the hamburger incident wouldn't be repeated. Salmonella was not a good thing, she was told in science class. She mixed the blend of spices the recipe called for together and mixed it with the chicken pieces. Haruka tried to add some more spice to it saying that she liked her food spicy.
"You can add some more seasoning to it to suit your own taste. Neither Michiru-mama, or I like really spicy food, remember?" Hotaru said. She was starting to get a bit exasperated.
"Can't we just put the vegetables in the microwave? It would be faster." Setsuna asked. Hotaru insisted on steaming the vegetables in boiling water. "It enhances the flavour. Trust me on this one." Hotaru replied for the umpteenth time in the last few minutes. Kami-Sama, didn't she learn to cook in all those centuries? No wonder she's so skinny. Hotaru thought, getting more irritated.
Haruka and Setsuna were busy making a salad while Hotaru set the table. At least they remembered to wash the vegetables. Maybe they can at least get a salad right at least. Hotaru thought as she set the silverware out. There was a crash from the kitchen and a voice yelling "AAAA! Hotaru!" Or not. Hotaru sighed and went back into the kitchen.
She was speechless at the sight she beheld. All of the pots on the stove were boiling over, making a huge mess on the floor and stovetop. Haruka and Setsuna were frantically trying to stop everything from boiling over with no success. Hotaru slowly began to boil over herself.
"We just thought it would cook faster if we turned everything up a bit." Haruka said.
"We didn't think all the water would boil out. We're sorry." Setsuna said weakly.
Both of them stared nervously at the angry young girl before them. Hotaru had a 'my top is about to blow' expression on her face. "Get out." She growled slowly.
"Hey we were just trying to help. Don't take that tone with us young lady." Haruka admonished. Then her face went pale as she saw the expression on Hotaru's face.
Hotaru's eyes were glowing and the symbol of Saturn appeared on her forehead.
"Now, Hotaru, don't get too excited. It's not healthy." Setsuna tried to reason with her, to no avail.
"Get out." Hotaru repeated in a low, dangerous voice.
"Look we can try again…" Haruka tried to say but was cut off with an angry glare. The wind seemed to be picking up in the kitchen at this point, and it was noticeably colder.
"Get. Out. NOW!" Hotaru roared in a voice that barely sounded human. Haruka and Setsuna yelped and ran out of the kitchen as fast as their legs could carry them. The kitchen door slammed shut behind them and there was an eerie silence.
About an hour later, Michiru woke up to a delicious smell that permeated the air. Someone was cooking something. Maybe Haruka and Setsuna invited Makoto over to make dinner. That was nice of them. She smiled and got out of bed. After a quick shower, she dried her hair, slipped on a pair of slacks, a blouse, and her favourite aquamarine sweater and went downstairs.
Setsuna and Haruka were in the living room looking very nervous about something. Every so often they would cast nervous glances at the kitchen door as if they expected something horrible to come out. "Ruka? Sets? What's going on?" She asked. Both of them jumped a foot at the sound of her voice.
"AAH! Michiru! Don't go into the kitchen! It's horrible!" Haruka stood up and grabbed Michiru by the shoulders. Setsuna did the same. Both had looks of stark terror on their faces.
"What? Don't be ridiculous! Did the two of you wreck my kitchen again?" She demanded. "By the way, where's Hotaru? She should be home from school by now."
"She-she's in the k-kitchen." Setsuna stammered pointing a trembling finger at the kitchen door.
"You mean, she's making dinner? That's wonderful! Those lessons with Makoto are paying off. Hotaru?" Michiru called as she wriggled free of their grasping hands and strode towards the kitchen.
"NOOO! DON'T" Haruka and Setsuna shouted as they tried to grab Michiru. Suddenly the kitchen door swung open, and the two of them screamed.
"Michiru-mama! You're up!" Hotaru said in surprise as she walked out of the kitchen with a steaming bowl of rice in her gloved hands. She set both the bowl, and the oven mitts down and ran over to hug Michiru.
"How are you feeling? Did you sleep well?" Hotaru asked as she hugged Michiru.
"I'm fine, never better. I slept really well, thank you. That smells great! What is it?" Michiru nodded her head towards the kitchen.
"Chicken and rice, along with some vegetables. Haruka-papa even got some pie and ice cream for desert!" Hotaru grinned. Haruka and Setsuna stood there speechless.
"Did she? Wow. Lets eat then before it gets cold. Let me help you get the rest of the stuff out here." Michiru and Hotaru went back into the kitchen to grab everything while a perplexed Haruka and Setsuna sat at the table.
"Maybe we were hallucinating." Setsuna remarked nervously.
"Yeah. Hallucinating. That's it. Must be." Haruka replied.
They both forgot about it as Michiru and Hotaru brought the rest of the food out, and they were soon digging in.
"This is wonderful, Hotaru. Thank you so much." Michiru said as she ate.
"You're welcome Michiru-mama. Haruka-papa and Setsuna-mama helped out a lot. I couldn't have done it without them." She smiled warmly.
"Aw, you're all so sweet. Thank you. I'm feeling so much better now." Michiru stood and went around the table hugging and kissing everyone.
"This is great. Those lessons from Makoto are paying off." Haruka said, smiling a bit, while trying to avoid looking directly at Hotaru.
"Yes we should call her and thank her after dinner." Setsuna said, also trying to avoid looking at Hotaru.
"We'll do better than that. We'll invite her and the others over on Saturday for dinner." Michiru stated. "Give Hotaru a chance to really show off then, right my little princess?"
"Right!" Hotaru grinned.
"Err, right. Yeah." Setsuna and Haruka said between mouthfuls.
"By the way, what were the two of you so scared about earlier?" Michiru asked.
"Oh, ah. We made a bit of a mess making dinner, and we didn't want you to get really mad at us." Haruka stated.
"Mess? What mess? Other than a bunch of dirty pots, the kitchen looked fine to me." Michiru frowned.
"We cleaned up as we went. Another thing Makoto taught me." Hotaru replied before Haruka or Setsuna could say anything.
"Oh, that explains it then." Michiru shrugged.
Dinner went by peacefully after that. Hotaru went back to the kitchen at one point to heat up the pie that Haruka had bought, while Michiru cleared off the dinner plates and such and came back with some smaller plates for their pie and ice cream. Soon they were digging in to some apple pie and vanilla ice cream.
Afterwards they were all sitting huddled together on the couch under a few blankets. Winter was still raging outside, but inside, all of them were warm and content.
"We should really do this more often." Michiru sighed.
"I agree." Haruka said, kissing her on the lips.
"As do I." Setsuna said.
"Me too." Hotaru agreed, kissing Setsuna on the cheek.
The four of them sat there quietly snuggled together as they listened to the cold north wind howling outside. It didn't matter to them as long as they were together.
The End.