The Dissection

I'm actually rewriting this… old idea, new formatting. Or the same. Eh, whatever.

I threw my bag down. Another day at work— done.

I decided that, since it wasn't so late, and I wasn't that tiered anyway… why not see what was on the television for a while. I flipped through the channels. Found a good science show. But the channel had quite a few commercials. So during the beak, I felt my eyelids getting heavier…

…and heavier…

As I was dozing off, I figured, why not sleep on the couch tonight? It was getting late anyway, and the TV supplemented the room perfectly with its flickering lights, so I decided that's what I'd do.

Wrong answer.

When I woke up, I found myself strapped tightly to a metal table, shirt and coat off, but luckily my pants were still on. Two strange figures loomed above me.

"Is he the one?"

"YES! Shut up!"

I guess the figure saw me looking up at it in horror, because it smiled in a sort of bitter-sweet way.

"Welcome, little human."

This creature was like none I'd ever seen before. It slightly resembled a Praying Mantis, only much bigger. It had red eyes and wore a red tunic. The other was identical, except for all the parts that were red on the other we're purple on him.

"Where am I?"

"You are on the planet Irk, human. You are the ULTIMATE specimen, and we plan on finding out more about you race using you."

"Me?"

"Yes. Everything will go smoothly if you cooperate. If you don't, things'll get tough."

"What are you going to do?" The thing that the red creature said next made me choke in my own saliva.

"Purple! Hand me the scalpel!"

"The what?" I asked firmly. But any moron could see that I was nervous.

"Aren't you supposed to be a scientist?" The purple one asked.

"The finest one in all of Earth!"

"Well then, you tell ME what a scalpel is." I coughed. Of course I knew what a scalpel was! These… these… whatever they were had strapped me down on a huge dissection tray! I was their little dissection frog!

"It hurts less of you grit your teeth together," the red one said. He took out a scalpel, and the metal glistened threateningly, as if bragging about its sharpness.

"Aren't their numbing medications?" I asked hopefully.

"Oh, we ran out of that."

Before I could say or do anything else, the red creature, without warning, sunk the scalpel into the tender flesh of my stomach area. I screamed in pain.

The purple one grabbed its antenna.

"They always scream!" It yelled.

"Purple, shut up!"

"No Red!"

I needed to remember those names.

"I'm gonna make it scream louder," Red said, slight humor in his voice. He moved the scalpel up and down, which enlarged the slit in my stomach.

"Ah," Red said. "The organs." He took out my large intestine and poked around at it a little.

"That's a strange squeedly-spooch," he said, amused.

I gasped for air. This was torture.

The creature now poked around in my stomach, yanking out organs from me, shoving them back in, and spattering around blood any which way and that. He shoved a couple more scalpels in there that sliced my flesh like a piece of cheese. The metal bed that I lay on was specked with blood and bile, and a sour, metallic smell filled the room. The scalpels lay bloody, chunks of organ on them, on the floor.

Red out the scalpel down. He took out my small intestine and stretches it a bit. It took all of my power not to throw up. He poked at the bloody tube of wet flesh and rolled part of it out on the bed. I screamed.

"Shh, shh, little human. It'll be okay. I'm almost done." Red took out a little box.

"Okay, little human. Now I'm gonna stitch you up!" Red took out what looked like a regular household needle with regular black thread. He did a poor job of stitching me up, as there was still a hole, and blood steamed from it onto the floor.

"Here's a ship for bringing you back home," said Red. He put me in it and waved goodbye.

"Thanks for being our specimen!" I stood in a daze. These creatures weren't evil, but rather foolish, and they didn't know what they were doing.

I knew that of I didn't get back to Earth soon, is be dead. So I grabbed my lab coat, put it on, got into my ship and flew away from that horrid planet.

H… home! It's never looked this inviting. Once I got out of the ship, it self destructed. This was probably so that no "alien life" would find it and get nervous or something. Snow was gently falling, and I opened up my coat just a little to let snow fall on the wound. The snow made it feel better, but not much. I could still feel the pain of the scalpel, and my organs bumped around, woefully out of place. I walked inside the house to find my children glaring at me.

"We have been searching around the neighborhood for THREE HOURS now, Dad," said Dib. "Where were you?" Dib stopped.

"And why are you bleeding.

I could say nothing. I vomited on the floor and moved out of the way, so that if I fell, at least I wouldn't be covered in my own stomach matter. I sat down in the couch, almost passed out.

Almost dead.

"Son," I said between my rapid breathing. "Call an ambulance."

Dib ran over to the phone and dialed the number.

"Help! There's something wrong with my dad!"

"…"

"I don't know! He came home late and his stomach is covered in blood!"

"…"

He spoke our address into the phone.

"Thank you."

He came up to me.

"What happened to you, Dad?" I groaned.

"Son, you were right."

"About what?"

"Aliens. They took me. Dissected me. They didn't know what they were doing. They dissected me alive, Son." My son just stared.

"Dad… were they tall? One red, one purple?"

"Y… yes!"

"Those are the Irkens, Dad. That's what Zim's species is."

I yelped in pain. The stitches were beginning to undo.

The ambulance finally came. I lay on the bed, and they brought me in. My kids climbed in with me.

I couldn't believe it. Dib was right. Dib… was right. About the aliens! If I got out of this alive, I would definitely repay him.

I looked out the small windows of the ambulance as it rode off into the night.

There ends this story. I will do an epilogue of I get three reviews telling me to do so. Hope you enjoyed. :)