Full Summary: I have no idea what boarding school is. BUT I'VE GOT THE BEST IDEA EVER FROM THAT!
Okay, this is another EREMIN fanfic *w*
Eren is in Titan School, a school for delinquents. He's in there for murder and a psychotic mind.
Jean is in there for anger issues. And that's the polite way of saying it.
Sasha is in there for stealing.
Connie is in there for a lot of things, all courtesy of being stupid.
Annie is there for murder.
Ymir is there for rape.
Krista is there for a split personality *w* (Sorry, I heard that Krista's supposedly a titan, too, so... * w* )
Mikasa is also there for murder.
Hanji is there for being the Experimental Killer.
Erwin is there for continuously sacrificing his friends.
Levi is there for cleaning people..
Then there's the two that don't really fit: Marco and Armin. These two have just been thrown to the wolves. They're in a world of evil delinquents. Will Marco and Armin be able to keep their innocence?! Or will it be taken away from them?! Find out!
Disclaimer: I do not own Attack on Titan/Shingeki no Kyojin.
Warning: TONS OF YAOI! Possibly rape, torture, bondage, etc.
Room Whatever-the-Word-it-is-I'm-Looking-for:
Eren and Jean. New members: Armin and Marco.
Sasha, Connie, and Hanji. {PERFECT. TRIO. I SWEAR.}
Ymir, Christa, Levi, and Erwin. {leftovers quite honestly :3 }
P.S. This was so amusing to write, so I hope you have as much fun as I had!-!
Key of Speakers here: The innocent speaking goes in a pattern. First Armin speaks. Then Marco. Then Jean. Then Eren. Jean. Eren. Then Armin. Then Eren. Jean. Marco. Jean. Both. I hope you can see the pattern: Armin speaks, then Marco speaks, but Marco will never speak twice in a row; Armin will never speak twice in a row. They take turns of innocent talking.
"OOF!-!-!"
"URGH!-!-!"
"OH GREAT. ANOTHER FU**ING ROOMMATE!"
"SH** UP, HORSE FACE- I'M DREAMING!-!-!"
"YOU'RE NOT FU**ING DREAMING, YOU A**-HOLED WEIRDO!-!-!"
"YOU HAVE AN A** HOLE, TOO!-!-! MAYBE I SHOULD PLUG IT!-!"
"WHAT'D YOU SAY?!-!-!"
"U-Um.."
"Hn?" Eren looked back at the door. "... I'm stealing that one," he said, and went back to staring at his bedpost.
"I swear...!" Jean growled and looked at the pair of awkward kids. "... so? What are you two in here for? Seem like a bunch of innocent kids."
"Uh.."
"Well?"
"... ?" Armin and Marco both shrugged.
"... Callin it, split personality."
"It better not ruin that cute face."
"FAAAAAA**OT!-!" Jean mocked.
"I'm your ROOMMATE, Jean. I know you dream naughty things about me," Eren swayed his legs back and forth, seeming deep in thought.
"YOU'RE DELUSIONAL!-!-!" Jean roared.
"Am I? Your pants are always wet when you wake up." Eren turned to Jean with a smirk, "Too bad I don't find you attractive, Horse Face."
"Grrrr..!"
"H-Hey, g-guys, do-don't fight!-!"
"AWE, SO CUUUUTE~ So fu**ing innocent. I wanna ruin him!-!"
"WHY AM I HERE...?" Marco whispered in horror.
"FAAAAAA**OT!-!-!"
"GAY BOY~!-!-!" Eren mocked back, sticking his tongue out.
"I WILL KILL YOU, YOU MOTHERFU**ER YEAGER!-!-!"
"BLEH," Eren stuck his tongue out further.
"Eren... Jean... Are you fighting AGAIN...?" a voice roared from behind them. {It's the a** that nobody likes. The weirdo with the horrified face. The one who 'trained' the trainees.}
"YEAH, WHATCHA GONNA DO ABOUT IT?" both responded.
"Th-They're twins..." Armin mumbled, but soft enough so that the anger kids didn't hear him. Marco nodded.
"RUN UNTIL YOU CAN'T RUN ANYMORE!-!-!-!-!" he roared.
Eren stuck his tongue out while Jean replied, "You can't make us do nothing!-!"
"FINE!-!-!" he roared and got out ropes. The pair's eyes widened, and they sprung for the door.
"G-GET OUT OF MY WAY, YEAGER!-!-!"
"I'M THE ONE GETTIN OUT FIRST, YA HORSE FACE!-!-!"
In their argument, neither was able to run away, and they were tied together, facing each other.
"GO* DA** IT, NOT AGAIN!-!-!-!-!" they roared a scream of frustration as the jerk left. Marco and Armin couldn't hold in their giggles. "WHAT ARE YOU LAUGHING AT?!-!-!" the two roared.
"I'LL KILL YOU!-!-!"
"I'LL RAPE YOU!-!-! SAY GOODBYE TO YOUR FU**ING VIRGINITY!-!-! AS SOON AS I GET FREE, I'M RAPING YOUR A** _H_A_R_D_!-!-!-!-!" Armin and Marco went dead silent at Eren's prolonged threat. "I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE SILENT, I'M STILL GONNA RAPE YOU!-!-!"
"_W_H_Y_ DO I HAVE TO BE STUCK TO THIS MOTHERFU**ER WHILE HE'S HORNY?!-!-!-!" Jean groaned loudly.
"I DON' WANNA BE STUCK TO YA EITHER, YA FA**OT!-!-! YER FU**ING CO** IS STICKIN OUTA YAH PANTS!-!-! AND IT'S DISGUSTING, 'CAUSE IT WAS BROUGHT ON BY _M_E_ BEING STUCK TO YOU!-!-!"
"IT WAS NOT!-!-!" Jean denied in anger. Armin and Marco tried harder than the first time to keep their giggles in.
"YOU MOTHERFU**ER GAY BOY, I DON'T LIKE YA!-!-! GET THAT THROUGH YOUR THICK HORSE SKULL!-!-!" Eren roared and slammed his head against Jean's.
"I HATE YOU ALSO, YA MOTHERFU**ER!-!-!" Jean hit back. This process continued, and eventually, Armin and Marco were bursting out laughing.
"WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM?!-!-! FU** OFF!-!-!" the two growled angrily.
"THAT'S IT!-!-! I'M GONNA POUND YA A**ES SO HARD, YOU'LL WISH YOU WERE IN _h_E_L_L_!-!-!-! YOU'LL BLEED, YA MOTHERFU**ING MOTHERFU**ERS!-!-! YER A**ES'LL BE BROKEN!-!-!-! THEY'LL BE LIKE FU**ING TUNNELS!-!-! LEMME AT 'EM!-!-!" Eren struggled against the ropes. Jean accidently moaned. "... YOU MOTHERFU**ER, YOU A**, YOU FU**IN DI**WAD, I'LL KILL YOU, YA MOTHERFU**ING #$ #$&# # &&$%# !-!-!-!-!" Eren continued spatting curse words that Armin and Marco had never heard before. "YA KUSOU DI**WAD, URASAI!-!-! KEEP YOUR FU**ING MOANS IN YOUR GO* DA** MOUTH!-!-!-!" Eren continued screaming until they had fallen unconscious from exhaustion. Finally having no criminals listening to them, Marco and Armin burst out laughing, rolling back and forth on the floor.
In the morning, the door had been left open, Armin and Marco were on the floor, happy tear stains on their faces, and Jean and Eren were sleeping peacefully together.
Which all went into chaos when they woke up.
"WHAT THE FU** ARE YOU HUGGIN ME FOR, YOU &%#$ &#% DI**WAD!-!-!"
"WHAT AM _I_ HUGGIN YA FOR?!-!-! YOU'RE THE ONE WHO'S CLINGIN, YA &%$# %#& $ FA**OT!-!-!"
"HUH?!-!"
"WHA?!-!"
Eren and Jean continued spatting at each other, and the pair of innocence realized it was just them squabbling again. {Is this a mystery? Because we still haven't found out what Armin and Marco are there for. Is this a mystery fanfic?} The two with anger issues cussed continuously at each other until the door creepily opened, like last night.
"Eren.. Jean.. Stop fighting, or I'll make you two stay together for the entire day." That made the pair get silent. And pale.
So they spent five more minutes stuck together before the jerk finally let them separate. Both screamed, running the other way, cussing at the other. Marco and Armin stood there awkwardly.
"What just happened...?" Marco asked.
"Well, at least we weren't killed or raped," Armin reminded Marco. Marco nodded in agreement.
"Ah, you must be the new recruits?"
"Huh? Uh.."
"Armin Arlert and Marco Bodt?"
"Oh!" both nodded, memorizing their roommate's name.
"Let me tell you right now!-! We don't let you fools do whatever you want!-! We're strict!-! So don't even THINK about being fools!-!"
"?-?-?"
Shooed by the jerk, Armin and Marco went to their classroom. There was Eren, glaring at them.
"U-Um.." Armin whimpered. Marco was as scared as Armin.
"I still haven't made you pay for laughing at me!-!" Eren growled, "You can bet that as soon as we get back, your a** is mine!-!"
"Eren.." Mikasa mumbled from behind him. It was common knowledge to the class that she had the hots for Eren, and now the new recruits knew as well.
Sasha and Connie were off in the corner, laughing about how they'd successfully stolen food last night. Ymir was hitting on poor Christa, and Annie was staring intensely at the new blonde. Hanji was off cackling to Levi about her experiments (as usual), and Erwin was thinking intensely of plans. No doubt involving many sacrifices.
The class was full of psychos. But you already knew that.
"Um, E-Eren, p-please don't hurt us?" Armin whimpered.
"Like heck I'm not!-! You know, this is only getting me turned on!-!" Eren smirked, "You're such a cute little mouse, really!-! And whimpering for survival of your co** is only gonna make me want you more!-! Hehe!" Mikasa heard that and immediately began glaring with glowing red eyes. Armin screeched and hid behind Marco.
"Um.." Marco bit his lip awkwardly.
"And who are you to call me by my first name, huh?!-!" Eren growled, "That's MASTER to you!-! Eren-sama!-! Say it!-!"
"Eek!-! E-Eren-sa-sama!-!" Armin screeched, hiding further behind Marco. Marco just stood there awkwardly like a doll.
"YOU HALF A**ED & #%% $& # #%$ ARE GONNA & #%# $#% #$& AND SUCK MY & #%$# $&%#$!-! YOUR A**ES ARE GONNA BE &#%$# &#$ #$%# # CAVES WHEN I'M FINISHED WIITH YOU!-!"
"There he goes again, talking about rape- how disgusting!" Levi rolled his eyes, "I've got to wash him sometime!-!"
"Nah, I think it's SMEXY. Anyway, anyway! So then, then I tore out his intestines!-!-! Wahahaha!-!-! Isn't it great?!-!"
"You're disgusting!-! You need a wash as well!-! A THOROUGH wash!-!"
"AND THEN I'M GONNA & #%#$$ &#$ %$ & AND $r# $&$r$% *$$^# &%$# , YOU HEAR ME?!-! YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT! I'M GONNA &#$$%$# #r$&% #$#&# %$#&# % %$#!-!-!"
"Alright, children~! Settle down, settle down~!"
"FU** OFF, PIXIS THE &$#% &#$%$ #&% ##% $ #!-!-!" Eren screamed.
"GIVE ME YOUR FACE- I WANT TO DISSECT IT!-!-!"
"YOU'RE DISGUSTING!-! YOU OBVIOUSLY NEED A BATH!-!-!"
"N-NEE, DO YOU HAVE ANY FOOD TODAY?!-!"
"FU** YOUR MATH!-! I'M SMERT AS SH**!-!"
"YOU NEED TO BE SACRIFICED FOR THE GREATER GOOD!-! YOU WOULD BE SUCH A FANTASTIC SACRIFICE!-! YOUR DEATH COULD SAVE _M_I_L_L_I_O_N_S_!-!-!"
"FU** OFF!-! I'M TRYING TO FU** CHRISTA OVER HERE!-!-!"
"HELP ME!-!-! SH** UP, YOU WAGNER!-!-!"
"I'LL KILL YOU.."
"FU** OFF AND LET ME SUCK EREN'S CO**!-!-!"
"His eyes are spider webs!-!" Armin whispered harshly in amazement.
"I KNOW, RIGHT?!-! LEVI, LEVI!-! I'VE GOT A NEW FRIEND!-! SEE?! SEE?! THAT''S WHY I WANNA _D_I_S_S_E_C_T_ HIM!-!"
"Wh-What?"
"Why do I feel like he's a danger to us all..?" Marco mumbled in fear.
"Alright, alright!-! Now, let's go to the gym everyone!-!"
So they went to the gym.
"Oh.. That's why," Marco paled upon seeing the crazy obstacle course.
"HAHA! LOOK- PIXIS THE & %#$ % #& CAUGHT A HORSE FACE ON THE WAY HERE!-! HAHA!-!"
"Kirstein, you know you can't skip class."
"FU** YOU, PIXIS, YOU #%$ & $%$#%#t# DI**-SUCKER!-!-!"
"KEEP THAT GAY FA**OT AWAY FROM ME!-!"
"Now, now, Jean, Eren. If you fight, you know what'll happen.."
"!-! ..."
"Now then, first up is our new recruits!-! Let's give them a full ATTACK WELCOME!-!-!"
Everyone cheered and cackled like maniacs as Marco and Armin held each other, fearing for their life.