A/N:This is a re-write of a story I previously posted on the site; after re-reading my work and feeling the need to stab my eyes out repeatedly due to its terrible construction I decided to chunk the whole thing and start over. If you read The Dominic Effect during its dark ages I am terribly sorry for my poor judgment in deciding to post it. Please forget all you read and we'll see if I can get this right the second time around. I will warn you now, this fic has light-hearted written all over it, I'm going to have fun writing it and I hope you can have fun reading it. Remember, I do not own Harry Potter.
Chapter One
Sirius shook the edge of his robe vigorously, attempting to dislodge a large patch of plant slime clinging to the hem. Why it was mandatory to trek down to those heat-traps Hogwarts called the greenhouses he doubted he would ever understand; even the cool September breeze sweeping across the lawns couldn't rid him of the tacky humidity trapped in his clothes. It was only the first week of term and Sirius was already wishing his sixth year was over and it was summer again, if only so he could lounge around James's house and devour all of Mrs. Potter's cooking.
"Hey Moony, do I smell like dragon dung to you?" Sirius asked, thrusting a robed arm in Remus' face.
Remus wrinkled his nose. "Oh, so that's what stinks," he drawled and took a few cautious steps backward.
Sirius let out a melodramatic gasp, "I'm offended, Moony. We didn't even use dragon dung today; there is no way I stink!"
"I was only teasing Sirius, no need to get all worked up," Remus sighed, rolling his eyes.
"Too late. I think you owe me an apology, something that shows you're truly sorry for your cruel words." Sirius paused a moment, pretending to think. "I know! You could let me let me take a look at your essay for McGonagall, so I can be sure I hit all the highlights." In fact, Sirius hadn't hit any of the highlights, considering he hadn't bothered to write the essay at all, but Remus didn't need to know that.
"I told you to finish that last night," Remus muttered, protectively shifting his schoolbag closer to his body.
Sirius scowled. His approach had been too obvious; he should have just nicked the essay during Potions when Remus was busy learning or something.
"Well, I told you I was meeting up with Analee last night," Sirius muttered crossly.
Remus never seemed to understand that an evening with a pretty girl was worth much more than a grade. You couldn't talk to a grade, or flirt with a grade, or meet up with a grade after class. And you certainly couldn't kiss a grade - well, maybe Remus could, but he was the exception, not the rule.
James, who had been lagging behind most of the walk toward the castle, slowed even more as the three boys approached the lake, craning his head to catch a glimpse of a pretty red-head lazing at the water's edge.
"Prongs, I'm not sure Lily would find that open-mouthed stare appealing, or even flattering for that matter," Remus murmured, slowing as well so he could send an admonishing elbow into James' side.
"I just can't help it Remus. She grows more and more beautiful everyday..." James smiled dreamily. "Maybe I should just go say a quick hello, welcome her back to school and all..."
Sirius shot an arm out in front of James, effectively blocking his path. "You're not capable of just 'saying a quick hello,' and I'm not too fond of the idea of fishing you out of the lake before class."
"I won't need any help fishing myself out of the lake, thank you very much," James quipped and headed in the direction of the shore before either of the boys could stop him.
"Two galleons he'll be soaked when it's over," wagered Sirius.
Remus watched James march down the lawn toward Lily. "Three galleons he'll be soaked and have a black eye."
The boys shook hands and continued their trek to the castle's heavy wooden doors. A small, mousy-looking first year stepped in the doorway as they approached, scanning the lawn and fidgeting. His hands twisted in the fabric of his robes as he awkwardly searched for a familiar face among the carefree students milling about. Every few moments he would smile nervously at the students passing by him into the castle, though few acknowledged he was there. Sirius couldn't help be reminded of Peter, and Remus' amused smile suggested he was thinking the same.
"When do you think we should go see Peter?" Remus asked.
Sirius shrugged. "He's only been in the Hospital Wing for a few hours, the bloke's probably still out cold. Let's visit after dinner; we can bring him some dessert."
Remus nodded in agreement then turned to smile warmly at the young boy as they reached the entryway. However, an indignant shriek quickly drew his gaze back over the lawns, just in time to see Lily land a punch on the left side of James' face and send him tumbling into the water.
Remus snickered, "Sirius, I believe you owe me three galleons."
The sound of squelching footsteps approaching the Gryffindor table drew Sirius and Remus' attention from their lunch. James was soaked to the bone and still dripping a thin trail of water in his wake. An ugly purple welt stained his cheekbone.
"You wouldn't happen to have a spell for this, would you Moony?" James asked sullenly, gesturing at his sopping robes.
Remus rolled his eyes as he waved his wand and uttered an incantation, "Celerem Arida."
James dropped heavily onto the bench beside the others, the dry clothes doing little to lift his mood.
"Well, you were right, you didn't need any help fishing yourself out of the lake," Sirius grinned devilishly at James, and ducked quickly to evade the fork the grumpy boy sent flying his way.
James eyed the goblet of pumpkin juice in front of him. "Glacia," he ordered, tapping the rim with his wand, and watched as the amber liquid froze inside the goblet.
"What was it that set her off?" Remus asked. Sirius turned his curious eyes on James as well.
"That's just the thing," James grouched, "All I did was ask her how her holiday had been and compliment the way she looked in her robes." He snatched up his goblet and held it gingerly to his swollen eye. "Then she punched me, for no reason at all!"
Remus raised his eyebrows. "You complimented her robes?" he asked dubiously. "How?"
A pout formed on James' lips, "Nothing bad, I just told her that she filled them out better than she did last year..."
Sirius nearly choked on his pumpkin juice. "Jamesy boy, I know you aren't always smooth with the ladies but I thought even you knew better than to call a girl fat! I mean honestly!" His words dissolved into hysterical laughter.
James' eyes widened in horror as he turned to Remus, "You don't think she took it that way, do you?" He glanced down the table to where Lily sat, talking with what looked to be a second or third year boy. "I just meant that she'd, you know, matured. I mean, she's always had a nice figure but this year..." he trailed off and glanced down the table again, blushing slightly. "Lily couldn't be fat if she tried!"
Remus smothered his own laughter, "James, I'm not so sure that was a compliment at all. At worst she thinks you called her fat, at best she thinks you're a pig and you only desire her for her looks."
Sirius nodded sagely, having finally recovered from the hilarity of James' situation. "At least this isn't the worst you've said, we should be able to get you out of it with a little planning."
Remus mumbled under his breath as he stabbed at his beans, something about 'always complicating simple solutions,' but Sirius and James were too focused on creating their own fix to hear him.
As the trio left the dining hall a short while later and made their way to Potions, Sirius continued to encourage James to speak with Lily again that afternoon. Remus, hanging a safe distance behind, was doing his best to look as if he was not associated with them, so as to avoid receiving blame for any plan they devised. He and Lily were not friends per say, but they were on good terms and he had no desire to change that.
"Once she understands-" Sirius was cut off by a round of noisy giggles coming from a pair of sixth year girls walking in front him. As he glanced at the pair he couldn't help but think it really was too bad he wasn't a girl himself, it sure would make explaining Lily's feeling to James a much easier task. But, seeing as he wasn't a girl, and James' key to winning Lily's heat was understanding the thoughts of a sixth year girl, it seemed he should take advantage of the two charming examples walking right in front of him.
"Here, I'll go ask the girls what they think you should do." As soon as the words left his mouth Sirius was down the hall and tapping the tall, blonde Rosina Vane on the shoulder.
With Sirius engaged in what would doubtless be a long, gossiping conversation, Remus fell into step with his remaining companion. "Sirius and I were thinking we should visit Peter today after diner, he'll be thinking we've gone off and forgotten him."
"What are you talking about? He's probably having the time of his life up there, getting the royal treatment from Madame Pomfrey, free from classes and," James wrinkled his nose as he and Remus walked past a group of students with green and silver crests on their robes, "Slytherins. We could leave him there for a month and he wouldn't even realize we were gone."
Remus frowned. "James, the kid idolizes you, it wouldn't be right to ignore him when he's hurt-"
James threw his hands up in surrender. "Hey, hey, I didn't mean we should leave him there for a month." He laughed good-naturedly, "I agree, let's go by the hospital wing tonight on the way back from dinner."
Double Potions with the Slytherines was not a class anticipated by any Gryffindor student, but with Slughorn for a professor some days it was almost enjoyable. Today, it seemed, would be one of the better days. As James and Remus entered the dank dungeon classroom they were greeted by a deep, echoing laugh and Slughorn's jovial smile.
"G'day James, Remus. You're in for an interesting lesson today." He winked at the boys as they took in the state of the classroom. The tables had been pushed to either side of the room, leaving an aisle down the center leading to a large, bubbling cauldron at the front of the classroom. In the center of each table rested a smaller cauldron, surrounded by a set of phials and small drinking glasses.
Sirius stood by one of the round tables, still in deep conversation with Rosina. When he saw Remus and James enter he smiled warmly at the blonde and politely excused himself. The three found an unoccupied table toward the back of the room and sat down.
After one look at the steaming liquid bubbling in their cauldron Sirius turned up his nose and began making gagging noises. "What is this stuff?" He asked, disgusted.
"Polyjuice Potion." Remus' brow furrowed and he looked at Slughorn, who was still greeting students at the door. "But this is very advanced potion-making, I can't imagine he'd be planning a demonstration." Remus wondered aloud.
"Poly-what?" James asked, experimentally prodding the concoction with the end of his wand.
"Polyjuice, it's-" Remus' reply was cut short by Slughorn's booming voice echoing through the classroom.
"Who here can tell me what this potion is?" Slughorn questioned, eyes scanning the room.
Remus' hand shot up, almost as quickly as Lily's, and a large smile spread across Slughorn's face. "Yes, I should have known you two could tell me. Miss Evans, what is it you see in the cauldron before you?"
"It's Polyjuice potion, Professor," she answered promptly.
"Yes, yes, very good m'dear; five points to Gryffindor! And what does it do... Mr. Lupin?" Slughorn inquired, turning his attention to Remus.
"It's a transfiguring potion, sir. It allows the drinker to assume the identity of another person. The user must add a piece of the person they wish to become - most popular are the hair and nails - and then drink the potion. One dose lasts for about an hour," Remus replied confidently.
"Ah, m'boy, you are exactly right; take another five points for Gryffindor! Polyjuice potion is used to transform oneself into another person. Although, as Mr. Lupin mentioned, it wears off rather quickly," Slughorn confirmed, smiling happily at Remus.
"But sir, this potion takes moths to make. You must have been working on it all holiday." Remus paused, thinking, then added, "And you made so much. If you don't mind my asking, why?"
"A very good question! Though I'm afraid I can only tell you part of the answer. It seems some other teachers were in need of a rather large batch, so I made a little extra for my favorite class. Today, as I teach you about the process of creating Polyjuice Potion, I will allow each of you to experience its effects for yourself."
This announcement received several shocked and eager exclamations, which seemed to please Slughorn. "Alright, I want each of you to spoon out a glass of Polyjuice Potion for yourselves. Then remove a strand of hair and put it in one of the phials on your tables. The girls will place their phials in the basket on the left and the boys will place theirs in the basket on the right," Slughorn said, gesturing to two small baskets on his desk. "Once everyone has turned in a lock of hair, you will pick a phial at random from your basket and add it to your glass of Polyjuice Potion. You may begin."
There was murmuring and shuffling as everyone hurried to follow his instructions. Sirius rolled his eyes. "Leave it to old Sluggy to plan an interesting lesson today. I guess I'll tell you what my sweet Rose suggested later," he said to James.
"It doesn't matter what Rosina has to say, if you would just apologize to Lily the problem would be solved," Remus muttered, ladling the thick potion into his glass.
James pointedly ignored Remus, "I'm glad we don't have to switch with the girls, it would be just my luck to pull Lily's hair from that basket." He gingerly rubbed his swollen eye, "I don't think I could take another confrontation with her today."
Grinning, Sirius reached for one of the extra glass phials, "Later though, this could be useful." He removed the cork and slid the tiny bottle along the side of the cauldron until it was out of Slughorn's view. Casually he ladled out enough Polyjuice Potion to fill the phial, stoppered it, and slid it off the table into his school bag.
James shook his head and addressed Remus, who was pretending to be absorbed in filling his own phial with hair instead of watching Sirius' delinquency. "Hey Moony, how much hair do we need to turn in?"
"A few strands I imagine. Just make sure you pull it out by the root," Remus responded absentmindedly, "the root is the only part of your hair that can make the potion work, it contains..."
James, however, was no longer listening. He was staring intently at a boy standing in the doorway, one he was sure he had never seen before in his five years at Hogwarts. With brown hair, a round, childish face, and a rather stubborn chin there was nothing spectacular or unusual about the boy. Had his eyes not been shifting nervously between Professor Slughorn and the Polyjuice Potion, James may not have taken notice of him at all.
Remus, noticing he had lost James' attention, followed his friend's gaze and watched as the boy pulled a sealed letter out of his bag and handed it to Slughorn. Slughorn scanned the page and placed it on his desk with a puzzled glance at the boy. Seeming to get no further explanation, he merely offered an answering nod and returned to the front of the classroom to give further instructions.
After a few moments of silence Sirius glanced up from his potion, only to catch the strange new face staring at him. "Who's the kid?" Sirius did not remove his gaze from the boy as he asked his companions, intent on intimidating the young student into looking away. But the boy's strange silvery eyes never wavered.
"Dunno, don't think I've ever seen him before," James mused. "Wait a minute," the boy had turned away to seat himself at an empty table and James caught sight of him from behind. "That's the bloke Lily was sitting with at lunch. He's in Gryffindor."
"He must be new this year," Remus reasoned.
James shrugged, interest lost, and Sirius followed suit, but not before he noticed the new boy send a charming smile in Lily's direction.
The Great Hall's noise level had reached a mind-numbing roar by the time Sirius, James, and Remus arrived. Slughorn's lesson had run late and Sirius was still giving the play-by-play of his conversation with Rosina as the group slowly approached the Gryffindor table.
"You see, Rosina doesn't think Lily is angry at all, she's just playing hard to get. The solution?" Sirius paused dramatically. "Do it again."
Remus rubbed his temples, fearing the headache this was sure to incur. "Sirius, there is no way repeating the incident is going to solve anything," he sighed.
Rolling his eyes, Sirius continued, "Listen James, she didn't even hex you. If she was really mad she would have hexed you, but she didn't. She's interested, but she doesn't want to seem easy." He placed a conspiratorial hand on James' shoulder, "Rosina is right, you should try again, but make sure Lily sees you're trying. Offer to carry her books to class or something, then you can throw compliments at her as you walk." Sirius waggled his eyebrows, "and be sure to have a free hand, just in case."
A/N: Well, there it is. I hope you enjoyed it and PLEASE leave me your reviews. As this is simply a re-write of a story that didn't do too hot the first time I would really like to know if it's worth continuing to edit, so love it or hate it let me know. I don't want to waste my time on something "eh" when I have other projects to finish.