My hands grasp around the steaming cup, and I feel the hot tears coming once more. I see the ripples in the tea through my blurred vision as my tears splash into it, and I feel my body shaking with sobs. It's been weeks now, but I can't seem to stop them. They just keep coming back for another round, and I always lose. I stand up, glancing towards a photo of me and you at the Gold Saucer. Your blonde hair is all ruffled, the spikes nearly gone because of the wind in the gondola. And your smiling, your actually smiling. We look so happy, but now?

And they come again, the tears. I don't know what happened, but you suddenly took off without so much as a note to tell me where you had gone. But I suppose, it was my fault in the first place. I told you enough was enough, you barely talked to me anymore, we seemed to drift apart. But now, we don't talk at all. And I wonder where you've gone, because it hurts so much. You know, maybe if you talked to me, as a friend, it would be easier on me. But not talking to me at all, it hurts me so much, it's making me long for you.

We don't talk anymore, and I don't understand why. It's like you gave me wings and told me it's illegal to fly.

Round 3. I wonder, will these tears ever leave me? I walk slowly towards the stairs, trying to control my body from the shaking, and then I hear a knock at the door. I look around, and I hesitate. Is it you? If it is, what would I say? If it isn't, would they ask why I've been crying? I haven't told anyone you know, that you've gone and it's all my fault. It's killing me, but I think they would hate me if I knew, that a threw away a man who loved me.

The knocking again, more insistent this time. I take a deep breath, and I open it.

"Aerith..."

I don't care what you say, you're here. And here's round 4 when I'm in your arms, and I'm whispering in your ear.

"Forgive me Cloud..."

"There's nothing to forgive."

God, kill me now. God, wake me now. Because I could have sworn I was just called an angel, I could have sworn I just grew my wings.

----------------------------------------------------

Love to all of you who read this, since you now know what's wrong with me. Double love to James, whose the only one I've told with words, thank you for acutally trying to make me smile.

BTW, I was trying to write an Valentine's fic for Valentine's Day, and I got halfway, but I gave up. I still might finish it, but it will be late.

Bah! I want a happy ending!