So this is something I started to do with Numb3rs but sadly I fell out of that fandom enough to not write fanfic courtesy of getting to know David Krumholtz thrugh his twitter feed. *shudders* But I thought it would be interesting to write it for Chuck and give me a chance to try different genres of writing.

Its going to be 26 chapters going through the alphabet.

Title A: Abandon
Summary: Chuck and Ellies dad has left them.

Chuck curled up under his bed in as tight a ball as he possibly could which wasn't an easy feat. At only 13 Chuck Bartowski was by far the tallest in his class already and showed no signs of stopping, but right now he wouldn't let it stop him from hiding from the world.

He curled up tighter and let out a weak sniff, inhaling all the dust and mites that hid under there with him. His allergies would be out of control soon and he would suffer for it but he wasn't really concerned with that. He felt he deserved it. He deserved to be miserable and suffering.

Chuck gasped a few times as sobs tried to leave him, his eyes burned with tears trying to escape. But he willed himself to not make a sound. To not cry because he deserved this. Something was wrong with him that made people want to leave him and he deserved this second abandonment. Or at least that's what Chuck told himself and felt with his whole being.

"Chuck?" Ellie's voice rang out down the hall. Chuck held his breath and curled impossibly tighter not making a sound. He didn't want to be found, even by Ellie.

He watched as Ellie slowly opened the door to his bedroom and peaked in. Not seeing him in the immediate vicinity she left, leaving the door cracked and went in search of him. Chuck let out the breath he was holding and choked back a sob at the same time. He lay still listening to his sisters light footsteps wander around the house in search of him. He could hear as she opened and closed doors and other places, knowing his ability and likes for hiding in small places. Eventually though she returned to his bedroom.

She stood at the entry for a moment before entering and closing the door softly behind her. Chuck heard her sigh softly as she sat gingerly on the side of his bed. The siblings sat in silence for a few minutes each in their own thoughts about their situation. Both not quite sure what's happening or what's to happen.

"I don't know what to do Chuck." Ellie said finally, her voice soft and cracked. He could hear the tears falling down her young face and he didn't quite know what to do or say to make it any better, so he just laid there silently not making his presence known even though he was sure that Ellie knew he was there.

"Chuck, please come out." She whispered, but he made no move to exit his spot, just scrunched up tighter.

He felt the bed lift as Ellie stood up and he watched as she lowered herself to her knees then hands to peer under the bed. He met her brown eyes through the darkness, feeling no shame from hiding from the world. He was surprised however when she squished herself to the floor and scooted in next to him.

They were lying nose to nose under his bed; Ellie flat on her stomach with Chuck curled in in a tight ball. They just stared at one another for a few minutes, just basking in being in each other's presence. It was surprisingly comforting to Chuck. With all the pain and hurt he felt he just felt like being alone, like lashing out at the world and pushing everyone away as he had climbed into his spot. But being there with so close made his chest constrict and the overwhelming urge to let his emotions out ran through him.

Ellie must have noticed for she reached over and wrapped her arms tightly around him. He didn't struggle, he just pulled in closer to her and buried his head in her chest and finally let the tears fall. He sobbed hard, his body wracking from the force of his despair. He felt his sisters hands gently rub his back in a soothing manner as her body wracked with sobs as well.

For what felt like hours but was most likely over half an hour they held each other close and let the sorrow that filled them out. Finally they subsided and just laid on the carpeted floor, the only noise heard was sniffles from running noses and deep breaths as they tried to steady their beating hurt hearts.

"I don't know what to do Chuck." Ellie repeated softly from her earlier statement. Chuck didn't know what to do either. "What are we going to do? How are we going to fix this?" She asked desperately. He knew the questions weren't directed at him so he didn't bother to respond.

They laid in silence a few more moments, the air below the bed feeling thick and heavy with all the dust that lived there. It was starting to get uncomfortably warm as well but neither made any move to get out. Chucks fingers twirled the ends of Ellies hair absently as he tried not to think of anything.

It didn't exactly work as just the act of twirling Ellies hair brought back memories that caused him pain. He used to do the same to his mother's hair. Whenever she picked him up or when they cuddled his thin little fingers always found a way to the tips of her hairs and he twirled them over and over again, enjoying the feel. It was a comfort thing that he did right up to the day she had left them.

His heart constricted and a new wave of tears threatened to engulf him and he closed his eyes tightly to prevent them falling. He had cried enough over his mother's abandonment. Now was a time to mourn for the current hurt, his father's abandonment.

He didn't know how exactly to feel or what exactly to do. Once he came home from school this afternoon to find Ellie crying and informed him that their father was gone, his mind had gone practically blank and his emotions ran rampant. He let himself go into autopilot as his body and mind worked together to give him what it thought he needed a safe place. So he had crawled under the bed. It was dark, it was empty, and it was small. Everything he felt at that moment.

"I'm sorry Ellie" He whispered to her. Her eyes focused finally and looked him in the eyes.

"What are you sorry for Chuck?" She asked him confused. He took a deep breath and bit his bottom lip for a moment stopping his sob before continuing.

"It's my fault." He said. Ellies reaction was immediate.

"No, Chuck, no it's not." She said soothingly.

"It is. I should have done something. Or not done something. If I was quieter with Morgan, or if I had spent more time on my chores. I failed gym. If I had passed maybe he wouldn't have gone?" He said desperately, tears falling from his eyes again.

Ellie immediately wrapped her arms around him again tightly as he continued listing off things he could have changed to make their father leave them. Ellie didn't say a word, knowing that nothing would stop this momentum until he was finished. Finally he stopped and she pulled back from him looking him directly in the eyes.

"This is not our faults Chuck. This is his fault. We are children. He's supposed to protect us, love us, and keep us safe and he didn't. We didn't do anything wrong." She stated firmly.

"But if we were better…"

"No, everything you listed Chuck are all parts of childhood. I know, I've done them. We did nothing wrong. I don't want you thinking that ok?" She said. Chuck thought for a moment before nodding agreement, though he knew he would continue to think on it and dwell.

"What are we going to do Ellie? Where are we going to live? How are we going to live?" He asked her, voice rising slightly as the fear of the unknown finally captured him.

"I don't know yet. We have money. Dad left us some so we're ok for now. I guess we just go about our business and live life as normal as we can." She said. Chuck thought about that, the fear growing at the thought of the unknown before a horrible thought caught in his head.

Ellie would leave for college in the fall.

His sister was one of the most intelligent people he knew, and others have taken notice as well as she had received a full scholarship to an Ivy League school on the east coast somewhere. Ellie noticed his fallen demeanor and looked at him questioningly.

"What is it?" She asked simply, but he didn't want to tell her. He didn't want to make her feel bad for leaving him. She had a dream to be a neurologist and he couldn't stand in her way. Chuck just shook his head as best as he could lie on the floor. "Chuck tell me what's wrong." She persisted.

Chuck rolled the best he could to face the end of his bed and scooted out from underneath. He stood up straight to his full height, eyes squinted from the bright sun as he stretched his long limbs out. He wasn't sure how long he had been curled under the bed but he's pretty sure it's been a long while. He stared out the window for a few moments as he heard his sister climb out after him.

His heart felt heavy at watching the kids in the neighborhood play outside, riding their bikes, skating, and playing basketball at the hoop down the street. He suddenly felt very removed from all of them. He was one of them not a few hours ago but he now felt like an outsider, like a kid who found out Santa wasn't real. He suddenly was thrown into an adult world with responsibilities and fears that he never though he'd have to deal with and he wasn't quite sure what exactly to do.

Ellie stood up from behind him and stepped next to him and put an arm around his waist. She stared out the window with him in silence watching the children play as well.

"We'll be ok Chuck. We have each other ok? We'll figure it out." She said confidently. But Chuck didn't feel the same way.

"For now at least." He said so softly Ellie almost didn't hear him.

"What do you mean?" She asked. He wasn't sure if he should say it now or just live their lives till they can't. One blow a day was his limit and he wasn't sure how he'll handle this blow but her eyes were desperate to understand and know what he was thinking. She was worried about him, always being the mother to him that he hadn't had due to her abandonment.

"Ellie you leave for college in a few months." He said simply. He wanted to say more but he was close to the edge of breaking down again. He wondered if perhaps he was going crazy and was curious on how much despair someone could go through before they break. Ellie was quiet as they continued staring out the window.

Chuck's heart sank at seeing Morgan come out of his house and start walking across the lawn. He knew that Morgan was headed over to his house wondering why Chuck hadn't come out or anything yet. Usually the sight of his best friend cheered him up considerably but right now he just didn't want to deal with friends. He didn't want to deal with anything, including Ellie. He just wanted to curl back under his bed and pretend the world didn't exist for a while longer. That he lived in a world where his parents were there for him and he hadn't a care in the world aside from normal kid things.

He smiled slightly at seeing Mrs. Grimes step out the door and yell at Morgan to come back. He watched as she seemed to be berating him slightly and telling him to come back in. He liked Mrs. Grimes. She was always kind to him, and was always willing to talk to him. After his mother left she ended up being a kind of second mother to him, always shoveling food down his throat, checking his homework when they were over at Morgan's house. She would inquire about his school work and knew of any events coming up.

She was a great mom and he frequently told Morgan that he should be honored to have her as such. Morgan always agreed with him even as he protested and whined about her. He never protested at the attention she gave Chuck, actually kind of encouraging it. Chuck felt blessed to have found such a best friend.

"I told Mrs. Grimes about dad." Ellie told him. He finally looked at her then. "I had to. She would have noticed. She'd be the only one." She said the last part quietly. Chuck thought for a moment.

"Maybe she'll let me live with them. After you go I mean." He said positively. But Ellie shook her head.

"I'm not going Chuck." She said sadly. Chuck felt guilt run through him head to toes at that.

"You have to Ellie. It's a great opportunity. You can't let it go." He protested finally turning away from the window.

"I wasn't ever planning to go in the first place Chuck so it's not a big deal." She said sighing deeply. She backed up to sit on the end of his bed and ran her hands through her hair. Chuck was stunned at this revelation.

"What do you mean you weren't planning on going? This is the best opportunity for you to fulfill your dreams. It will open so many doors to you for medical schools and fellowships." He protested further. But Ellie just shook her head more.

"I never planned on attending. I've made plans for years to stay here Chuck. I couldn't leave, I can't." She said.

Chucks emotions kicked up to high gear. He found it hard to breath and he felt everything close in on him. He felt so worked up he just wanted to fling himself into the wall repeatedly hurting himself until all the anguish he felt inside would show on the outside. But he didn't. He stood ridged next to Ellie.

"Why would you do that Ellie? You have a chance to get out of here." He said, Ellie shrugged.

"Is here such a bad place Chuck? It's not like it's a tiny town where we grew up wanting to be anywhere but here. Go three blocks north and it's like being in a different country. Here is fine. I can still fulfill my dreams here and be there for you." She said reaching for him, but Chuck would have none of that as he turned his back to her and walked towards his closet.

"I can't live with myself if you sacrificed your future because of me. Because you had to take care of your geeky little brother." He turned around and pointedly looked her in the eyes. "I want you to go and not worry about me. I'll be fine." To his surprise Ellie gave a light laugh and held her hand out for him again. Reluctantly he stepped forward and took it, sitting on the bed next to her as she pressed.

"It's not really your choice Chuck. " Chuck bristled and went to stand again but she held his hand tight and he stayed sitting. "It's my life Chuck and I'll do with it what I will. Whether I leave and go to college or stay here and take care of you."

"I don't need taking care of Ellie. I will do just fine." He protested but she shushed him. Ellie took a deep breath before continuing.

"Look, ever since mom left, or even before that when she was gone, I always knew somehow that I'd end up taking care of you. I always knew somehow that it would be you and me. I made my peace long ago about it. And I've always planned on staying here and going to school here. I'm not going to leave you Chuck, not ever. I promise you that." Chuck lowered his head brining his hand up to his face and hiding his eyes.

"You can't say that Ellie. Everyone leaves." He cried out. He felt her wrap her arms around him again and he leaned into her.

"I know which is why I decided a long time ago that the only way I'll leave you is through death. No matter what you're stuck with me Chuck. We have nobody else. Our parents have left us and we have no other family. We're all we have and I'm never letting you go until I have no choice." She said without conviction. And Chuck believed her.

They sat in silence for a while after that, nothing really needed to be said. Chuck was full of questions and insecurities but they could wait till later. He wasn't sure what would happen, being only 13 with a 17 year old sister. He knew things would be tough from now on but he made an oath right there and then to make it as easy as he could on Ellie. If she was determined to stay with him and care for him he would do everything in his power to help along in every way he could.

They sat together on his bed watching as the kids finished their games and were called in one by one by parents to come in for dinner. To Chuck it was like watching the last of his childhood play out and he felt saddened, but as he gripped tighter onto his sisters hand that held his, he at least felt secure that at least one person loved him and would stay.

The End

A/N: There the first one. if you have any words for letters or anything or any story idea you'd like to see or anything feel free to review your idea. Peace yo!

MissMonk