Never Say Never
Perry awoke when his wristwatch beeped. He looked at it. It read 6:59 AM. He looked at Ferb, soundlessly sleeping. He looked at Phineas in his bed. He was sleeping too. The platypus sighed. He was supposed to go in early today to help train his new recruits, but today was also his owners' first day back at school. He didn't want them missing it. He was about to wake up the sleepy Ferb first, when suddenly the alarm clock went off. Both boys awoke, stretching and yawning. Phineas turned off the alarm.
"Morning, Ferb!" He greeted his stepbrother. "Ready for the first day of school? Wow, it feels really weird saying that. It feels like only yesterday that it was the start of summer vacation. Where did the time go?"
"Actually," Ferb put in. "It feels like it has been almost eight years since our holiday began." Phineas laughed.
"Right!" He agreed. "Still, where did the time go?" He looked at his platypus. "Morning, Perry!" The semi-aquatic mammal greeted with a chatter. The boy got out of bed, went to his stepbrother's bed, and picked up his pet. "We'd love to play with you today, but it's the first day back at school. You can understand that, don't you?" Perry chattered again. He put Perry back down on the bed.
"Boys," Their dad said, coming to their room. "Are you ready for your first day back at school? Your mum is downstairs, making breakfast."
"We'll be down after our morning routine, Dad." Phineas promised him. Their dad nodded.
"And in the meantime, I'll be downstairs. We just said goodbye to your sister ten minutes ago." Lawrence then went downstairs.
"Darn!" Phineas cursed. "I really wanted to say goodbye to Candace. Oh well, we're see her when we get home. I'm sure she's having a great day back, just like we will. Well, Ferb, our PJs won't undress themselves. And our teeth won't get brushed themselves ether." Ferb nodded in agreement.
"They never do." The boys went out of their room with their clothes. Perry went to his bed. He did four circles, instead of his usual three, and his secret entrance to his HQ appeared. He sighed. He wish he could just stay until after he was done walking Phineas and Ferb to their bus, and wait until the bus left like he always did on his owners' first day. But, alas, he couldn't. He had to get down there, and greet the new agents. He dived, and slid down the slide to his lair. The entrance closed up behind him.
"You just wait ten years." Phineas said in Isabella's flashback. Isabella was awake, thinking. What about ten years? Are they going to kiss? How did Phineas know about this? This thought has been in Isabella's mind all night. Isabella's mom then called up to her, snapping her back into reality.
"Coming, Mom!" She said, and looked at her dog, and patted him. "Oh, Pinky, what did Phineas mean by waiting ten years?" The dog barked, giving her a lick. The girl laughed.
"Isabella!" Her mother called again. "Come on; you don't want to miss your first day of school, do you!"
"I'll be down soon, Mom!"" She called back down, getting out of bed. She looked at the Chihuahua. "Well, Pinky, I hate to do this to you. I have school, so I can't play right now. You understand?" Pinky barked again. Isabella laughed, and went to get changed. Pinky went off to his HQ.
"Morning, Agent P." Monogram greeted the agent platypus, going over to him as soon as Perry entered HQ. "I'm sorry. I know it's early, and you wanted to walk your owners to the school bus, but you have a busy schedule today. You can't always get what you want. You understand, Agent P?" Perry nodded. "And hey, if we get all done early enough, maybe you can walk your owners home when their bus drops them off." He then changed the subject. "You ready to meet the agents, Agent P?" Again, Perry nodded. "Good, follow me." Perry followed his boss as they went though a door.
They got to a room with two double doors on each side. A metal track was beneath a drop. Perry didn't see the drop, and was about to walk farther when Monogram stopped him. "Whoa! There's a drop here Agent P; look out." The platypus stopped instantly when he was on the edge.
A car then came out of one of the doors, and came to a stop. In the car were a hyena, a cat, and a macaw, all wearing fedoras. All of them had ray guns, and there were digital scoreboards with their scores attached above their seats.
"I just saved your life, Agent P." Monogram said to the semi-aquatic mammal. "That car could've killed you." The new agents came out when the door to the car opened.
"How was it?" The Major asked. "Who won?" The macaw, cat, and hyena all spoke at once. Monogram put his hands up in defense. "Whoa, whoa, not all at once, besides I have no idea on what you're saying, even Maggie who can talk human speech." He then looked at Agent P. "This is Agent P. Agent P, this is Maggie the Macaw, Harry the Hyena, and Karen the Cat. I hope you get along, because you are all going to work together from now on. Now, come, I'll take your to your first test." The Major went though some more doors, the agents following. He turned to Perry. "Oh, and Agent P, Doofenshmirtz is part of your team, but he's teaching at the local high school today. He'll train with us on weekends. Oh, and Carl won't be working as much because, well, you know, school. And we have a new intern, Doofenshmirtz's daughter, Vanessa."
"That training session was sure fun!" Harry spoke up. "Especially because I won with a whopping nine million points!"
"Correction!" Maggie stated. "I won. I got a million and one points!"
"Well, I would've gotten more points if that bandit didn't run like a cheetah!"
"Well, it can't be easy. That's no fun when you're training to be a agent."
"I think it could be a bit more easy. I mean, we're rookies! The boss has to know we're not that good yet!"
"You're just saying that because I beat you." Harry murmured something unintelligible under his breath.
"Well, a nine million and a nine million and one points are really good for beginners." Perry spoke. He looked at Karen. "How about you Karen? How many points did you get?"
"You don't want to know." Karen said. "I stunk."
"It's okay." Perry told the cat. "We won't judge you."
"She got the lowest." Harry said. "Not even a thousand points." He laughed. "We beat her big time!"
"Harry!" Maggie scolded. "Be nice!"
"I can't help it if she got the lowest."
"It was hard." Karen admitted to Perry. "I didn't know how to work my gun until halfway though." Harry laughed again.
"Which is good, because you would've had no points whatsoever, and would've stunk even more!"
"Harry!" Maggie scolded again. "You have to laugh about everything, don't you?"
"Well, duh! The world will be a pretty dull place with no laughter."
"Well, you have to remember to keep your jokes to a minimal." Perry reminded the hyena. "You don't want to offend someone, and hurt their feelings. Then, it's not funny. It's disrespectful, and you'll just be a cold-hearted jerk." Harry huffed.
"Animals and humans get offended so easily nowadays."
"Okay." Monogram announced when they were in an isolated room. He turned to the agents. "Now, when you go to your nemesis's place, the first thing you might encounter is a trap!" He pressed a button on a remote he grabbed off of a table, and straightjackets dropped on all of the agents, including Perry. Karen, Harry, and Maggie struggled in them, trying to get them off. "Like straightjackets," They looked at him. "What? Your nemesis could be on an insane asylum. Now, you have to get out of them as fast as possible. Now, watch Agent P, and see how long it takes him to get free, then it's your turn." He grabbed a stopwatch from the same table, and looed at the platypus. "Ready, Agent P?" Perry nodded. "Okay, 3, 2,1, start!" He started the timer, and Perry began getting out of the jacket. "Now, pay attention to how Agent P escapes, then you do it exactly like he does." The hyena, macaw, and cat all looked at their fellow agent, focusing on his every move.
Monogram stopped the watch when the agent platypus was done.
"14 seconds!" He said. "Good job, Agent P!" He high fived the platypus, and looked at the other animals. "Now, it's your guys' turn." Perry grabbed two stopwatches of the same table. "Now, I'll time Harry, and Agent P will time Karen and Maggie. See if you can beat Agent P's time. 3, 2, 1, start!" He and Perry started the stopwatches, and the three rookies started struggling instantly.
Maggie was the first to get free. Perry stopped her, and showed her the time. Maggie smiled. Monogram saw her time.
"17 seconds!" He said. "Nice job, Maggie, for a rookie!"
Next it was Harry who got out four seconds later. Monogram stopped his.
"21 seconds!" He told the hyena. Perry smiled.
"Good job, Harry." He congratulated.
"Oh, it was nothing!" Harry bragged. "I could've gotten out in my sleep!" He looked at the still wriggling Karen, and chuckled.
"Looks like Karan is still struggling. This could take a while." They all said encouraging words to Karen.
"I can't do it!" Karen complained. She sighed. "I'm going to stop."
"No!" Perry said. "Don't give up; come on, you got this!"
"Well, okay."
Ten minutes went by, and the poor cat was still struggling. Monogram sighed.
"Okay, Agent P." He told him. "You better stop Karen's watch, and help her out." Perry nodded, stopped Karen's timer, and aided her out of the straightjacket.
"I'm sorry, Perry." The cat apologized to him. "I tried and tried, and I couldn't do it. I even paid attention to what you did, but I still couldn't do it."
"That's okay." Harry said. "We did it, and we were awesome!" Maggie nudged Harry, who yelped.
"You don't have to apologize." Perry informed the cat agent. "You did your best, and that's all that matters. All you need is practice. And with enough of it, you'll be an expert in no time!" Karen smiled.
"Thanks, but I'm a bit of a klutz. So, expect things to go wrong with me."
"Everything that can go wrong, will go wrong!" Harry said.
"Hey!" Perry stated. "Murphy's law! I didn't know you knew that."
"Well, yeah, it's kind of obvious if you observe long enough." He then was confused. "What's Murphy's Law?" But, he didn't get an answer as they all followed after the Major. "Guys! Hello?"
Monogram led them to an area with lasers.
"Now," He began. "This area is filled with lasers. All you have to do is go to the other side, while missing all of the lasers. Each laser you don't miss will subtract points. If you miss every laser, you'll get all the points there are. Watch Agent P first." Perry went through the area, dodging each and every laser. The animals applauded when he was done. Monogram looked at the rookies. "Now, it's your turn. All of you may go at once."
"Y-you all go first." Karen stammered. "I-I'll follow suit." Harry laughed.
"Yeah, right!" He jeered. "No, you won't. You're just a scaredy cat!" He laughed again. "Hey; scaredy cat! You're a cat, and you're scared; I get it now!" Perry and Maggie glared at him. When Harry saw them, he stopped laughing. Maggie looked at the terrified cat.
"It's okay to admit you're scared." She told her. "We're your friends."
"I'm not scared!" Karen said.
"Really?" Harry tested. "Because it sounds like you're scared. Well, since you're not scared; why don't you go first?"
"No; it's okay. You go first."
"No, I think you should go first." Harry got behind Karen, and pushed her with his nose.
"No; you go first." Karen went back.
"No, you." Harry nosed her again.
"No, you go first." Karen went back.
While the two animals were bickering, and Harry shoving Karen repeatedly, Maggie ran across, and dodged all of the lasers with ease.
"Good job, Maggie!" Monogram congratulated. "You made it across!"
"Hey!" The parrot shouted at the hyena and cat. The two animals looked over at her. "While you two were bickering, I got across! Now stop fighting! Harry, if Karen doesn't want to go first, then you shouldn't force her. She's inclined to her own decision!" Monogram looked at the two animals by him.
"See what you two can accomplish without fighting?" The old Major asked them. "You should listen to your parrot friend. I don't speak parrot, but I think she wants you two to make up, and cross as well." Harry sighed.
"Fine!" He declared. "I'll go first, and show you how it's done!" With that, the hyena ran across, dodging like a pro.
"Good job, Harry!" The Major looked at the cat. "Now, it's your turn." Karen didn't budge. "Come on." Karen still didn't move. "I don't get it. They're lasers. Usually they excite cats such as yourself." He then figured it out, "Oh, I think I got it now. Karen, are you not going because you're afraid the lasers might be too temping for you." Karen nodded. "Well, that's easy. Just don't be tempted by them, and you'll be fine." Karen glared at him. Easy for him to say; he's not a cat. Monogram sighed.
"Look," He coached. "I know it's hard for you to not want to go after lasers for some reason; but I have full confidence in you. You'll do great." Karen looked at him, then at his friends who all urged her on, except Harry. "Come on, all of your friends are encouraging you on, well, except for the hyena, but he'll be your friend later I'm sure. You can do it. I believe in you." Karen nodded, straightened herself up, and went towards the lasers. Everyone but Harry cheered. "Whoo; that's the spirit!"
Karen tried to dodge all the lasers, but couldn't, and sirens kept going off. She also tried not to 'catch' them, but the temptation proved too much. She ran behind Monogram, and shivered. She also mewed in shame. Monogram bent down to her.
"Don't worry." He told her. "You'll do fine in the days ahead I'm sure. Remember, practice makes purrrrffffect!" He laughed as he stood up. "Ha! See what I did there? I said 'purrrfffect' because you're a cat, and you purr. That's a purrrfffect pun if you ask me." He saw that Maggie and Perry were glaring at him. Monogram stopped laughing, and looked at the cat. "No really, all you need is pratice, and you're be a pro in no time. Practice makes perfect. Now, let's move on to the next thing."
Perry sighed as he looked at his watch. Maggie noticed this.
"What's wrong, Perry?" The macaw wanted to know.
"It's nothing." Perry told her. "It's just that it's my owners' first day of school, and I walk them to the school bus in the mornings on their first day since they got me. It's not a big deal. There's always next year, and hopefully I can pick them up at the bus when they come home."
"My owner isn't a kid. She's a lady in her fifties. Her granddaughter starts kindergarten today. Her mom was going to take her to the bus, and pick her up, but the mom's in the hospital, and the dad has to work, so she's doing it until she's better." Perry smiled.
"That's nice."
"Yeah, yeah, it is."
"Where's Perry?" Phineas asked. He had looked everywhere, but couldn't find the platypus anywhere. "Have you seen him, Ferb?" Ferb shook his head.
"It's time to go now, boys." Linda told them. She had the camera around her neck. Lawrence had already left for work. "The bus will be here soon." Phineas frowned.
"But ever since Perry was a platypup, he was always there when we went to the school bus."
"Well, it looks like he'll have to miss it this year, or maybe he'll come. and we just don't know it. But, either way, your bus won't wait. We have to go now." Phineas gave a sad sigh.
"Okay." He and Ferb grabbed their backpacks, and left with their mom.
Baljeet, Buford, and Isabella, along with other kids and their moms and dads, were already at the bus stop when the boys and got there. Linda and the boys all said hi to their friends.
"Are you already for school?" Baljeet asked Phineas and Ferb. The boys nodded.
"Heck, yeah!" Phineas said. "Last year of elementary school, here we come!"
"I wasn't ready." Buford confessed. "But, I'm never ready! Mom literally had
to pull me out of bed!"
"Are you going to build insane stuff next year, Phineas?" Isabella wanted to know.
"Never say never, Izzy." Phineas replied. Isabella blushed as Phineas winked at her, and for what he called her. Baljeet was confused.
"So, where's Perry?" He asked. Phineas frowned.
"We looked for him before we got here, but I guess he's at wherever he goes to every day already." He informed him.
"Oh, that's too bad. He's always here on the first day."
"Well, not today." He then smiled. "But I can't let that put me down. This is going to be a great day!" His friends smiled. Linda took their pictures, and waited for the bus for another one.
"Phineas?" Isabella began to ask. Phineas looked at her. "Yesterday, while we were singing, you mentioned that you kissed me, and when I asked, you told me to just wait ten years. What did you mean by that?" Phineas blushed.
"Well, I, uhh…" But he didn't answer for the bus came into view. "Oh, look, the bus's here." Isabella sighed in defeat as the bus door opened.
"How was your summer, Phineas?" His bus driver asked after he greeted them. Phineas laughed.
"If I told you, we'd be here all day!" The bus driver laughed.
"Wow, it sounds like you've gone through early puberty over the summer. Your voice is deeper."
"That's exactly what Ferb said on the way to the bus stop."
"Well, he's right. Is his voice different? "Phineas shrugged.
"It's been so long that I forgot." The bus driver laughed.
"Yeah, it seems like it's been about eight years."
"That's what Ferb said too!" The bus driver laughed again. The boys' mom took quick pictures of them.
"Okay. You boys better take your seats. Other kids got to get on, and we'll be on our way." The boys bid their mom a farewell, and he, his stepbrother, and kids took their seats. Their mom waved to them as the bus took off.
Perry and the other agents did more tests. They took a break during lunch.
"So, how was the morning?" Monogram asked the animals. All of the animals talked at once. Monogram held his hands to quiet them down.
"Whoa, not all at once. Well, regardless if you liked your training or not, it's over for a bit. You can talk amongst each other during lunch. We'll pick up again in half an hour. He then left to let the agents eat.
"Well, what do you think of the agent biz so far?" Perry asked, eating a worm from his bowl.
"Awesome!" Harry explained. "It's nice to know we get to save people from danger. After all, you can't laugh when you're dead."
"I like it too." Maggie put in. "The thrill, the adrenaline rush, feeling proud when it's all over, and knowing you're a real hero, now that's what I signed up for!" Perry looked at Karen.
"And how about you, Karen?" He asked. "What did you think of all that training?"
"Dangerous." Karen replied. "I'm thinking of quitting." Perry and Maggie looked at the cat in shock. Harry just lapped the water in his water bottle.
"Quitting?" Perry questioned out loud. "I know it's a extremely risky job, but you can't quit. This is your first day of training. Give it some time, and then see what you think."
"I think I'll still think it's dangerous, and that I should've gave it all up on the first day of training."
"Look, that's just your fear talking to you. It's common of animals thinking of quitting on the first day. I should know, a friend of mine and even me were thinking of the exact same thing when we started." Karen looked at him.
"You did?" She wanted to know. Perry nodded.
"Oh yeah, and what's worst, is that we had and still do have families who we live with. What will happen if we never came back from a mission? What will our owners think?"
"Good point. I wasn't thinking of that when I took this job. I live with a boy and his family. I was my boy's Christmas gift from his parents when I was a kitten two years ago. I can't let my boy and his family go though the pain. Now I know that I'm quitting!"
"Way to go, Pers!" Harry told him, sarcastically. "See what you did?"
"Maybe it's good that you have a family when you're out on a mission."
"How is it good?" Karen asked in shock. Maggie and Harry also gave him questioning looks.
"Yeah, what do you mean, Perry?" Maggie questioned.
"I live in the Danville Zoo." Harry said. "So everyone that goes to the zoo is my family! Millions of people will be saddened over my death."
"I think if you think of your family when you are moments to death," Perry began. "it rejuvenates you, and makes you stronger then ever because you know you have something to live for."
"I guess that makes sense." Maggie said.
"Then I'll be super strong then!" Harry put in. "Because I have more people to think of."
"So, I know this a difficult job," Perry said to Karen. "But no matter how hard it is, you can't give up, or you'll regret it for the rest of your life. Never say never."
"I guess, but I'm still scared."
"And you can be scared, there's nothing wrong with being scared. Even I'm scared at times, but you also can't let that get to you. You have to be brave. You might think that you can't do it now, but you have to try and keep getting better and better at it before you're a pro. Rome wasn't built in a day." Karen nodded.
"I don't know what Rome is, but you're right. I can't give up! I'm no longer going to be a scared little cat, and going to see this job through!" The animals cheered.
"That's the spirit, Karen!"
The agents did more training for the rest of the day. Maggie had a difficult time going through a maze of mirrors. They then had to diffuse fake bombs, which Perry told his new friends the story of how he tried to defuse one that he thought was a real one. Harry had trouble when his friends tried to make him laugh when he was supposed to not to laugh. They saved stuffed animals from fake burning buildings, learned CPR and the Heimlich maneuver, and more.
Karen had just finished defeating a robot all by herself!
"Good job, Karen!" Monogram congratulated the cat. "Taking risks when you're afraid, that's part of the job. Okay, that concludes today's training, see you tomorrow." Perry, Maggie, and Harry congratulated Karen too.
"You must feel so proud of yourself." The platypus told the cat. "If you do that and more each and every day, you may be a pro one day." Karen smiled.
"Thanks, I am."
"You may be a better agent then these two." Harry added, talking about Perry and Maggie. "But, not me, I won't be defeated by a girl."
"I don't know if we'll be better then Perry." Maggie put in. "He's been an agent way longer then us."
"Well, you can try." Perry said. "After all, I'm going to retire one day, and when I do, you three will be on you own."
"What about Doofenshmirtz?" Harry asked.
"You three will have to watch for him." Harry then laughed.
"Because he'll be a doof?"
"Exactly!"
"We'll make you proud." Maggie told Perry. Perry smiled.
"You already do." He then looked at his wristwatch. It was almost four. "Okay, I have to go. My owners will be home soon." Monogram and the agents all bid him farewell as he left.
The bus has just dropped Phineas, Ferb, and their friends off when Perry arrived. Phineas noticed him.
"Oh, there you are, Perry. We had a great day by the way." They then walked as he told him about his day. "Guess what? Ferb and I saw someone fly on a hovercraft and some activity at the bell tower while we were improving the playground during recess." Perry just chatted.
The big day has arrived, three months later. The day where Doofenshmirtz, Harry, Maggie, and Karen would graduate, and be real agents! Vanessa. Monty, Carl, Carla, Wanda Anonym, Pinky, and every animal agent of the OWCA were there. Vanessa hugged her father.
"I'm so proud of you, Dad." She said to him.
"Well, thanks, honey." He said back. "You know, I would never be in the place I am now without your help."
"Oh, gee, no problem, Dad. See? Isn't doing good better then doing evil?"
"You know, it's weird, but I didn't like being good at first. I still miss being evil, but being good is starting to grow on me."
"Take one step at a time, Dad. That's all I'm asking." Monogram came to the mike, and spoke into it.
"Welcome, agents!" He began. "Today is a glorious day for our agents in training. For today is the day that they graduate, and become true agents of the O.W.C.A!" Claps, cheers, and shrill animal sounds could be heard.
"Now," Monogram continued. "As I read each of your names one by one, you come on stage, and my son will give you your fedora, and your agent badge. First up, Doofenshmirtz!" Cheers erupted.
"You go get them, Dad." Vanessa told her father.
"Just imagine, honey." Heinz said to his daughter. "In less then two years, that'll be you up there getting your high school diploma, well not there there, but you know what I mean.""
"Yeah, yeah, Dad," Responded an irritated Vanessa. "Just get your badge and fedora."
"Yes, honey." And with that, the doctor went on stage. Monty gave the doctor his badge, and fedora. He then shook hands with him, Carl, and Monogram.
"Congrats, Heinz Doofenshmirtz." Monogram said to him. "You are now an honorary agent of the OWCA. Wow, I never thought I would tell you that." Laughter filled the room.
"Well, thanks." He responded. "Now, if you don't mind, I'd like to say a little speech." Monogram was shocked.
"You do? Well, no agent in the OWCA has given a speech before."
"Yeah, well, that's because they're animals. They can't speak."
"Well, I suppose you have a point there. Alright, Doof; you may give your speech, but make it brief." The Major stepped aside as the doctor stepped up to the mike.
"Greetings, my fellow animal agents!" He greeted. "Wow, never in a million years, would I had imagined standing in front of all of you, getting my badge and fedora, and becoming an agent of the OWCA, who, one of the agents I frequently fought with." He looked at Perry, who had happy tears in his eyes. "I would like to thank a very special platypus, Perry the Platypus. Through we fought, and became bitter enemies, I'll like to say you are my best friend." Everyone awed at that. "So loyal and true, helping me whenever I have a problem, even though he was supposed to hate me, and beat me to a pulp." Everyone laughed. "But he didn't, because deep down, he truly cares about me just like he cares for his two young owners, and the rest of his host family. Thank you Perry the Platypus for being always there for me, and being the best friend someone in his late forties could ever ask for." There was applause again. "I also want to thank my daughter Vanessa, for without her, I would never dream of doing this, and getting on the good side. Thanks, baby doll!" Vanessa blushed. "I like to thank my parents for giving me life, and the ocelots who…"
"Okay, Heinz, that's enough." Monogram interrupted. "No need for that. We can't stay all night, and we need to get to the other agents, and that wasn't brief." Doof glared at Monogram.
"I was almost done, Monobrow!" Monogram held his hands in defense.
"Okay, okay; sheesh, I'm sorry. Continue." Doof talked into the mike again.
"So, as I was saying I'd like to thank the ocelots who raised me when my parents couldn't. I like to thank Monogram for giving me this job, and everyone at the OWCA for accepting me, a human. Okay, I think that's it. Now, I'm not use to being nice, but I'll try my very best, and I trust all of you will help me when I slip up, which will probably be often." Laughs again. "Thank you." He left the stage, as cheers erupted again. Monogram spoke into the microphone again.
"Harry the Hyena, please come on stage."
When the ceremony was over, they had a party with punch, food, music, and dancing. Perry was proud of his trainees, especially Doofenshmirtz. He had come a long way from being someone who wanted to take over the Tri-State Area, to the man he is today. He'll miss beating him up, and stopping his rediculous schemes. Through, he still couldn't believe how someone he fought every day could join his agency, and become good, he couldn't wait to go on more adventures with him, along with his other new companions.