Looking for...

A small lamp provided just enough light in the bedroom to see Monica laying on her back in bed, the covers pulled up to her chin. On the bedside table stood a black radio playing some soft music. Monica's thoughts we're interrupted by a song that brought back so many memories, that tears slowly rolled down her cheeks.

I'm not looking for someone to talk to
I've got my friends, I'm more than okay
I've got more than a girl could wish for
I live my dreams, but it's not all they say

No one to hold me, no one to brush my tears away in this lonely bed. I have everything I always wanted, friends, a job, a roof above my head, both my parents, what else could I wish for. I lived for my dreams and took chances whenever I felt like it. I switched between jobs a few times before I landed a job as head chef in a culinary restaurant. My apartment was spotless as always and my parents, who had their flaws, were supportive of me. Still.......

Still I believe
(I'm missing...)
I'm missing something real
I need someone who releases me

I went on dates, but nothing more then that. My friends were worried about me, I was getting frustrated and I had mood swings, which I took out on my friends. After all I was not getting any younger according to my mother, although I was just 25. I longed for someone to wake up next to me, to talk sweet nothings in my ear, holding me in his strong arms and to kiss me awake. But this night had changed, my mind screamed...

(Don't want to wake...)
Don't want to wake up alone anymore
Still believing you'll walk in my door
All I need is to know it's for sure
Then I'll give all the love in the world

When someone knocked on my bedroom door I assumed it would be Rachel, but instead you walked into my room in some sweats and a T-shirt round midnight. The look on your face brought me out of my own, so called, misery. With the right sleeve of my pyjama I wiped my tears away that were still camping on my cheeks. I sat up and motioned for you to come in further and you sat down on bed besides me. I hugged you tight and you laid your head on my shoulder, I could feel you nuzzled my neck. Your arms embraced my waist and slowly you found your way next to me in bed.

I've often wondered if love's an illusion
Just to get you through the loneliest days
I can't criticise it, I had no hesitations
My imagination just stole me away

You brought your head back up from my shoulder and looked at me. I could feel your breath on my bare skin and it warmed my whole body, including yours. You kissed my cheek and pulled a strand of hair out of my eyes. No words were said, because we understood each other with out a doubt. You slowly draped the covers over our bodies and settled me in your arms. We fell asleep in a matter of minutes, the world around us soon forgotten.

Still I believe
(I'm missing...)
I'm missing something real
I need someone who releases me

(Don't want to wake...)
Don't want to wake up alone anymore
Still believing you'll walk in my door
All I need is to know it's for sure
Then I'll give all the love in the world

The warm feeling of your body against mine felt like living in a dream. I felt safe the way you hold me close and protected me from creatures in my dream. You were there, you were always there for me, the way I was there for you. The radio played songs of affections, like we were in love...

Love's for a lifetime
Not for a moment
So happy, don't throw it away
I'm only human
And nights grow colder
With no one to love me that way
I need someone who releases me

The next morning I woke up early and upon seeing your face I smiled broadly. Tracing every curve of your soft skin with my index finger made you squirm under the covers. I ruffled your hair and you peeked through your heavy eyelids. Kissing you on the cheek good morning, made you pull me on top of your body and you kissed my forehead tenderly. I loved waking up this way and I laid my hands on your chest resting my head on them. Your hands made it's way towards my back, roaming my sides on their way and finally reaching their destination, pulling my body closer.

(Don't want to wake...)
Don't want to wake up alone anymore
Still believing you'll walk through my door
You'll reach for me and I'll know it's for sure
Then I'll give all the love in the world

The love you gave me was something I never thought someone could give me. You made me feel special, wanted and satisfied. We reached for each other when things got tough and we both pulled each other to the other end. We lay like this many nights and early mornings, enjoying each others company and warmth. You would tell me stories about your life, work and most of all our friends, while I lay on your chest listening intently.

All alone
Just reach for me
Don't want to be alone
Let me know it's sure
Still believe in someone
When you reach for me
Let me know it's for real

I never really listened to you, because I was too busy watching you. Suddenly you withdrew your hands from my back, placing one of them on my cheek. With your other hand you turned my body over and pinned me down under you. You brought my wrists above my head and held them firmly, before you lend down and started to cuddle my neck. I felt your lips on my neck, slowly kissing their way to my earlobe, cheek and your trip ended when you started smothering my lips with little butterfly kisses. When you looked up from the position we were in you saw I had my eyes closed. I was enjoying the soft caresses of your lips and the weight of your body that pressed against mine. Somewhere far away I heard someone call my name and my eyes fluttered open. You were calling me, was I even listening to you?

Let me know it's for real........

Disclaimer: I don't own the words of the song "Don't wanna wake up alone anymore", they belong to The Corrs! Same goes for Chandler & Monica although they belong to Bright, Kaufman and Crane. I do own the black radio!

I hope you all enjoyed this little piece, maybe you can leave me some tips , a song maybe some verbs to say if this was any good, who knows I might write a continuation if I get enough fuel to get my motor running again! -xxx-.

January 2003