Seminars

Disclaimer: CBS still wants to keep telling the whole world that they own Criminal Minds, ok...

Summary: Due to a unfortunate misunderstanding Hotch and Emily wind up in a sexual harassment class, but the teacher hasn't shown up.

A/N: A quick oneshot humor piece. Review and let me know what you think.

Thanks for reading, don't forget to leave a review.

"When I'm good I'm very, very good but when I'm bad I'm better." Mae West

Emily and Hotch stood in front of the door, both looking over at each other.

"Do we have to do this?" Emily asked Hotch.

"Unfortunately, yes." Hotch said "Come on, might as well get this over with."

Hotch opened the door, letting Emily go in first.

"What are you two doing here?" Garcia asked surprised to see the dark haired duo.

Hotch raised an eyebrow at the sight of Morgan and Garcia in the nearly empty class room.

"Unfortunate misunderstanding." Emily muttered sitting down at a desk.

"And you two?" Hotch asked looking at his agent and technical analyst.

"Inappropriate phone etiquette." Garcia recited as though she said this a million times before.

"Why doesn't that surprise me?" Emily muttered as she removed her sweater.

Hotch took a seat next to Emily which caused Garcia and Morgan to exchange a look to each other.

"So" Morgan said casually "What did you two do that got you drug into here?"

Hotch and Emily looked at each other, both intent with not wanting anyone to know.

"Just a little misunderstanding." Hotch said.

"Hmm..." Garcia said "Sounds suspicious, doesn't it?"

"Yes, indeed." Morgan said.

A knock on the door caused the four BAU members to look over at the woman at the door.

"Is this the sexual harassment seminar?" she asked.

"Why, yes it is." Hotch answered.

"I'm suppose to tell you that, the seminar teacher is running late." the woman said "He asked that you remain here until he arrives."

"Great." Emily muttered to herself.

"Thank you." Hotch said watching the woman leave.

"So how long do these things usually last?" Emily asked the two repeat visitors.

"Over an hour." Morgan said.

"So what" Emily asked "They show you dvds and ask you to reenact some inappropriate scenario?"

Garcia and Morgan laughed, "Aw" Garcia said "Isn't she adorable?"

"What?" Hotch asked the laughing two.

"We sit here and get a lecture and are told what constitutes appropriate and inappropriate behavior." Morgan said.

"Ugh." Emily said banging her head on the desk "This is going to suck."

"Not as much as being told that we have to ask permission to even touch someone else and the red light, yellow light and green light behavior."

"What?" Emily asked "I'm confused."

"Green light behavior is brushing a shoulder up against someone, red light is down right..." Garcia started.

"Just plain dirtiness." Morgan said "Like groping someone in a parking garage."

"So you were brought in on what..." Hotch asked "Yellow light behavior?"

"Bordering on red light language." Garcia said proudly.

Emily tapped Hotch on the hand "Why am I not surprise?"

"Because it's Morgan and Garcia" Hotch responded keeping his hand on hers.

"Green light behavior" Garcia whispered to Morgan.

The two watched Hotch and Emily talking, noticing an new change between the dark haired agents.

The four BAU members watched as the door opened and noticed Dave walk in.

"Now this is a not a surprise." Emily chuckled to Hotch as they saw Dave taking a seat up in the front.

"So what brings you in?" Hotch asked his friends "More importantly why wasn't I told?"

"Stupid Sexual Harassment counselor thought I was making lewd comments to..." Dave muttered.

"To who?" Emily asked leaning in close to Hotch.

"Strauss." Dave said disgusted.

"Ew!" Both Emily and Garcia said shuddering.

"Great." Morgan said "Way to kill the fun of this place for me."

'If working horrible cases before didn't give me enough nightmares' Hotch thought 'This will.'

Dave looked over at the two agents and said "So how bad was it when Strauss caught you walking in on Emily undressing?"

"What?" Morgan and Garcia asked in shock looking at the dark haired agents.

"Explain?" Garcia asked.

Emily sighing looked over at the three agents while Hotch looked at his hands shaking his head.

"He went looking for me to sign a supposition" Emily said "And I was changing out of my work clothes..."

"I walked in by accident..." Hotch insisted.

"Mm hmm." Dave said.

"Really." Hotch said looking over at Emily.

Emily shrugged her shoulders and said, "I know."

The team remained quiet after that and noticed it was starting to get dark outside.

"Where the hell is that teacher?" Hotch asked.

A knock on the door, caused the team to look up and see a man walk in.

"Good evening" the man said looking down "My name is Mr. Stewart and I'm your Sexual Harassment teacher."

As he looked up he saw two returning faces.

"Hey Paul." Garcia greeted.

"Ah Penelope, Derek." Mr. Stewart said sighing "Didn't we agree to behave more appropriately?"

"Couldn't help it?" Garcia said sheepishly.

Looking over at the three dark haired agents, "Welcome Agents Rossi, Hotchner and Prentiss."

Three hours later, the five BAU members walked out of the class room with glee.

"Thank God that's over." Dave said looking at the team "Tell no one why I was in here."

"Sure" Garcia said smirking.

As the team walked towards the parking lot, Hotch turned to Emily.

"Are you hungry?" Hotch asked the brunette.

"Always." Emily joked seeing Hotch light up at that.

"Want to catch a bite with me?" Hotch asked shyly.

"Sure." Emily said walking with Hotch towards his car.

Taking her hand in his, Hotch didn't know what the future held but he was happy to have Emily in it.

"A terrible thing happened to me last night again - nothing." Phyllis Diller

The End

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