Disclaimer: Characters? Yeah, not mine. If they were, then… ahem You really wouldn't want to know how the Kingdom Hearts would REALLY be. -.-
Dedications: To my dear Thomas, who inspires me by simply being. Seriously dude, your rants on random things and your stories freakin' rock my dirty old socks. And that's that.
Rewind and Rewound
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It'd always just sat there, rotting away in the window, just waiting for someone to come by and notice it and its beautiful tinkling that induced tears. But no one ever came. Sure, there were a few who stopped by and looked at its intricate and meticulous hand-painted porcelain shell, but they'd all soon left it. So it continued to sit there, just waiting, no one ever listening to its melody.
The first chords resounded through the darkened club, and nearly all the dancers seemed to tense up at the sound of it before madly shaking and thrashing their bodies to the beat of the perfectly rhythmic, yet barely noticeable drums and bass. The beginning of a song always sent shivers up Roxas's spine, sent adrenaline rushing throughout his body. Through his peripheral vision, he caught the sight of familiar long wine-red hair wavering to the beat as the guitars and drums picked up. This was it; his adrenaline spiked as he sang out the first words of the song, letting everything go. The world was his and his alone, now, a place where there was no audience, no shapes, no sound, no feeling. It was all just pure energy flying out of him, reverberating back at him, ricocheting in every direction.
In what felt like a blink of an eye, the mass of energy disappeared, and Roxas found himself back on the stage panting softly, the crowd of dancers cheering and screaming as the guitars died down. He grinned widely down from the stage as his fellow band members did the same, each enjoying their time in the limelight before walking off the stage and into the back room to rest.
"Did you see how many people there were today?" Axel, Roxas's best friend and the band's zealous drummer, animatedly exclaimed as they all sank down into the various seats.
"Forget that, did you hear how loud they screamed at the end? Damn, man, I thought my ears were gonna explode," Demyx said, grin still plastered onto his face as he set his guitar down back into its case, carefully making sure it was still in perfect condition.
For a moment, everyone's minds reeled back to the last few notes and relished the exhilaration of being onstage. Axel had been the first to snap out of his reverie and turned to the side to ask Roxas a question. "Hey, Rox—," Axel began before cutting himself off, noticing the glazed look in Roxas's perpetually cerulean eyes that stared into the distance. He smirked, silently scooting closer to Roxas before poking him once, twice, three times in the arm. "Roxie's having another one of his music-gasms," Axel declared in a singsong voice to the rest of his band members. At this, Zexion, the bassist, stood up and walked over to Roxas, the grin on his face identical to Axel's. They glanced at each other, the gleams in their eyes sending telepathic plans to the other, and before Roxas knew it his cheeks were being pinched and stretched as fingers simultaneously jabbed into either side of his hips. Roxas jolted and spasmed, having been rudely shaken out of his music-induced paradise, immediately jumping out of his seat to chase down Axel and take vengeance for his abused sides. Just as he caught Axel and prepared to tickle him within an inch of his life, the door swung open to show, Tifa, the owner of the club at which they'd been playing.
"Hey, everybody! Great show out there! Seriously, could they be any louder?" Tifa grinned at them. Axel took this chance to push Roxas off of him, though he continued to lie on the ground. "So when are you guys gonna come back here for another gig?"
The band members all looked at each other for a moment before Roxas spoke up, "Well, we don't really know, yet. I mean, exams are coming up soon and stuff. But we'll try to come back if we can. If not, then after exams, we've got that winter break for two weeks."
Tifa thought for a moment before nodding and smiling at them. "Okay. Don't want you guys to drop outta school, after all."
Noticing that there was somebody behind Tifa, Axel sat up from where Roxas had pushed him down and asked, "Hey, Tif, who's that behind you?"
"Who? Oh! That's right! This is Kairi, my neighbor's kid. She started helping out at the club a week or so ago, and she wanted to meet you guys. So I said that I'd introduce you. Well, I've gotta get back out there, so have fun, kids!" Tifa left, surreptitiously winking at Kairi and pushing her into the room.
"Nice to meet you, Kairi." Axel had stood up and grabbed her right hand, gently laying a kiss upon the back of it, attempting to act like a gentleman when Roxas abruptly appeared behind him and finally took his revenge by stomping on Axel's foot. "Ow! Jesus, Rox! That hurt," Axel said, feigning pain as he rubbed his foot before getting a malicious glint in his eye and tackling Roxas to the ground, which resulted in a struggle between the two for dominance.
Demyx and Zexion laughed as the two jokingly fought each other for the umpteenth time. "Don't mind them, they're always like that," Demyx smiled at Kairi. "Nice to meet you, by the way."
Kairi giggled a little as Axel managed to pin Roxas's arms with one hand and began tickling him with the other. "It's not a problem. Those two are really close to each other, aren't they?"
"They've known each other for nearly thirteen years now," Zexion smiled fondly at the two still on the floor.
"Axel, stop it! I'm serious! Get off of me!" Roxas had managed to yell inbetween bursts of laughter.
Axel raised an eyebrow at this and smirked, "What do you say? I won't let you go until you say it."
"Fuck off, asshole!" Roxas shouted, a smile on his face, as he finally escaped Axel's clutches, breathless. "Yeah, sorry about that. Some retard had to go and poke me while I was thinking," Roxas teasingly glared over at Axel. "So why'd you wanna meet us, anyway?"
"Hmm? Well, even before I started working here, I'd known about you, and I'd been to a few of your other gigs. I thought you guys were pretty good, and I just felt like meeting you. I'd seen you guys around at school before, but we never really crossed paths, even though I hang out with your brother."
"So that's why you looked so familiar. I knew I'd seen you somewhere before. I wonder why I never really noticed you before."
Kairi shrugged, "I dunno." She hesitated a little before continuing on, "Are you, um, free later tonight? I was thinking we could—,"Roxas's cell phone cut Kairi off mid-sentence.
"Ah, shit. It's that time already? Sorry, Kairi. I've got to get going before Sora kills me. We'll talk some other time, maybe at school or something?" While Roxas and Kairi had been talking Zexion had already begun cleaning up their things while Demyx brought the truck to the back entrance. Roxas began helping Zexion pack their things as Axel loaded them into the truck. "Bye! See you around!" Roxas waved as he ran out and climbed into the truck.
It continued to sit there, gathering dust in the window; it couldn't do anything but wait. Another person walked past the shop, not even glancing in. It couldn't do anything—but wait! The person who'd just walked by had come back! It'd been a long time, too long, since anyone had even stopped to peer into the dusty antique shop window, so it begged, pleaded, to God above that it'd finally be noticed for once.
Roxas gazed at the snow as it steadily drifted down from the sky, like little flowers floating in the wind, taking off a glove and bringing his hand out to touch the ephemeral fluttering substance. He'd never really minded the cold as much as the others around him did; the feeling of being physically cold comforted him in some odd way. He didn't exactly hate heat, either. How could he, after living in Twilight Town, the city of eternal sunsets, for all of his life? Roxas slipped his glove back on and continued the peaceful trek home, watching his breath come in puffs of hot air when he heard his name being called from somewhere behind him. Turning around, he caught sight of Kairi, waving as she jogged to catch up with him.
"Roxas! Wait up!" She placed her hands on her knees to support herself as she caught her breath. "I saw you walking, and I wanted to talk to you. Do you, um, want to go out for some coffee? I know this great little café not too far from here, if you want to go, that is." There was a light flush slowly creeping onto her face, but Roxas brushed it off, thinking that it was because of the cold weather.
"Sure. I don't have anything to do today except study, anyway." Roxas softly smiled as Kairi walked ahead a little, leading the way, her own smile in place.
The two walked together in a comfortable silence to the café, each wrapped in their own thoughts, though still acutely aware of the other.
"We're almost there. It's just a little bit further from here, Roxas." Kairi smiled warmly at Roxas, though her body shivered a little from the cold.
Roxas had caught Kairi's small tremble and asked, "Are you okay, Kairi? You seem kinda cold."
Kairi laughed a little at this. "I'm just a little cold. I'll be fine once we get into the café and sit down with a hot cup of coffee. There it is!" Kairi pointed to the quaint café across the street.
Though it was a pretty small store, it made up for its size in warmth, both in temperature and mood. A blast of hot air greeted Roxas and Kairi as they opened the door and stepped into the welcoming establishment. Petite four-person booths were set up along the walls, while picturesque tables for two were charmingly placed in the center of the café. Roxas and Kairi headed to sit down at one of the window booths, and before long, a waitress came to take their orders, an amiable smile on her face.
"Welcome to Scarlet Rhapsody. How may I help you?" the waitress said cordially, pen and notebook ready to take their order.
"I'll have a caramel vanilla cappuccino with milk, please." Kairi smiled at Roxas, who was reading through the menu with great fervor.
"Ah, screw it. I'll just have a hot chocolate." Roxas threw the menu down before looking up at the waitress and sheepishly continuing, "Please. And thank you."
The waitress went on smiling at the two and left, telling them that their orders would be out shortly and leaving Roxas and Kairi alone. Blue met purple for a moment before Roxas nervously ducked his head and laughed a little. "Sorry. I don't really go to cafés a lot, and when we go out for coffee, I usually just end up ordering whatever Axel, Sora, or whoever ordered."
Giggling a little at Roxas's behavior and to clear the air a bit more, Kairi answered, "I could tell. How is Sora, by the way? He wasn't at school today. Is he sick or something?"
"Ah, yeah. Last night when it started snowing, he dragged me outside to play with him and Pluto. Somehow, he managed to forget to wear a jacket. Or shoes. Or pants." Roxas fondly sighed at the recollection of his brother playing in the snow. "So he stayed outside in shorts, socks, and a T-shirt for an hour before coming back inside, shivering his ass off, telling me to get the shower ready for him."
"That really sounds like something Sora would do. He's so forgetful sometimes. And I honestly can't understand how he can wear those shorts all year long like that, even if it rarely ever snows here."
"I can't either. Well, anyway, he's fine. He'll be back, as good as ever in a day or so." The two lapsed into a short awkward silence, Roxas staring out the window and Kairi staring down at the table, when the waitress came back out with their drinks.
"One caramel vanilla cappuccino and one hot chocolate for the couple," The waitress winked at them and left, while furious flushes crept onto both Roxas's and Kairi's face.
"H-how's the band?" Kairi ventured, attempting to push back the blush and move on in the conversation.
"We're all fine, but we haven't met up for practice or a gig in a while. None of us really wanna fail the exams later this week, though Demyx and Zexion should have no trouble with them at all. And Axel's not exactly stupid; he just likes to act that way to get attention or something. Once he gets serious about studying, he gets pretty damn serious. How's the studying for you?"
"I'm not really in danger of failing or anything, so it's about the usual. How about you? Isn't it a bit hard for you, since you have to take care of Naminé, work at your part-time job, and cook the meals too?" Realizing what she'd let slip out, Kairi clapped a hand to her mouth and muttered, "Sorry."
"Sora told you?" Roxas hesitantly asked. At Kairi's shy nod, he continued, "It's not really all that hard. My boss gave me a raise a little while ago and some time off so I could focus a bit more on school. He even paid me in advance so I wouldn't have to worry about the bills for the month. And Sora will eat almost anything I make him, so when I'm really tired, I can just make some sandwiches for dinner or something. He helps me a lot with the studying and stuff, too, even with his own job. As for Naminé… It's not like she can really help it. And I do care for her, so I don't really view it as a burden that I have to take care of her or anything. Sometimes, Demyx, Axel, or Zexion will drop by and help me with her so I can get some sleep. Sora asks Riku to come by and help every once in a while too."
Roxas trailed off and let his eyes stare out the window as he recalled the accident. It had only been two years ago, after all. Steel grated against wet asphalt as glass shattered all around him. It was all he could do to dive and protect his younger sister, but it still wasn't enough. He couldn't stop that piece of glass from reaching her spine, couldn't prevent her from being hurt. The last thing he remembered before blacking out was the blood, splattered all over the car, all over him. His own gushing out of his side, his sister's leaking through his hands, his parents' soaking the front seats. All he could think was that he was too weak to do a damn thing to save them.
"Roxas? Roxas!" A warm hand came and laid itself onto his shoulder, shaking him out of his trance. Amethyst eyes shone with concern, and the hand that had lain on his shoulder tentatively grabbed his hand. "It wasn't your fault, Roxas. It wasn't anyone's fault. You don't have to blame yourself for it, you know. Sora definitely doesn't. If anything, he's worried about you. He knows you think it's your fault, and he's told me he feels guilty for not being able to help you more."
Roxas slowly met Kairi's worried gaze before beginning to drink his hot chocolate as an excuse to hide his face. He finished the still steaming drink and laid it down, eyes returning to the window. "He helps me enough as it is. Can… can we stop talking about this?" Realizing that it was getting late, Roxas gathered his things. "Actually, it's gotten pretty dark out, so I'm gonna go. Ah, sorry for taking off on you again, but I really need to head home. And I'd walk you home, but you live on the other side of town, don't you?"
"It's not a problem. And, um, sorry for bringing up the memories again." Anxiety still laced her features as she watched Roxas run out, waving over his shoulder as he left.
The only thing it could do was sit idly by, but damn it! It was a music box for God's sake. It wasn't meant to just be seen; it was meant to be heard.
The stage called to him, it always had, beckoning him forth to shed his mortal shell and just be an entity. It offered comfort, a form of catharsis; it offered a home. It wasn't that his home was really all that bad, per se, but sometimes, he just needed to escape all the hardships and just breathe. And the stage, the platform, wherever he could perform, was always ready to accept him, welcome him. He could let go of his worries, the pretension, everything, and just be him.
And so there he was, once again, in front of the crowd, electricity already beginning to pound and throb in his veins. The guitars reared up, followed closely by the intense drums and bass, and Roxas fell. He plunged into that world of his, swam to its deepest depths, as the rivulets of energy floated and became lakes composed of the pure essence of life.
How odd. Before then, it'd always just been everywhere, all-encompassing, like the air surrounding him. This time, it seemed to form a sort of radial symmetry before his eyes, the rose reds and pomegranate purples swirling into one another.
Then, all at once, it fell away, flinging him back into reality and leaving him on the stage, the air humid and heavy with excitement. The vivacious cheering and whoops of approval finally reached Roxas ears, making him cringe slightly at the sheer volume of it all, the seas of people all crowding and pushing toward the stage making him feel vaguely claustrophobic.
Thanking the crowd for their patronage, Roxas helped his fellow band members clean up, blindly forcing himself through the crowd before collapsing on a tattered sofa in the back room, unaware of any other presences in the room. Roxas had no idea why a wave of lethargy had suddenly decided to crash on him; was it because he'd sung a few more songs than usual today? Was it because he'd stayed up the past week, constantly occupied with either housework or homework?
"Roxas? Are you okay?" A voice tentatively called from a few feet to his right, a hand bashfully reaching over to wipe a stray hair from his face. Looking up, Roxas saw Kairi, crouched on the ground, countenance saturated with worry. They hadn't met up again since the café incident, and the air was slightly awkward between the two. He elatedly met her clear amethyst eyes, finally realizing where the red and purple had come from.
Roxas pulled himself up, forcing a smile onto his face. "I'm fine, Kairi. Just kinda sleepy and tired," he said, wiping at his eyes. She frowned, taking his face between her hands for scrutinizing before dropping them a moment later, clearly unsatisfied but not voicing her concerns. The silence continued to pervade the room, which Tifa had sound-proofed in order to let the performers for the day relax in peace; the other members of the band had gone over to the bar to converse with Tifa, each having noticed Roxas's building fatigue over the last few days.
"I'm sorry," Kairi's half-whisper sliced the oozing quiet. "For the other day, that is. I had no right to… interfere with your family's affairs like that."
"Kairi, it's fine. I was the one who chose to share it with you, anyway."
"No, Roxas. It's not fine; you're not fine. Look at you! You're so pale right now, I'm afraid you'll pass out any minute now," her voice rose a bit with each word, at the level of a shrill yell by the end.
"Kai. It's fine. You're just exaggerating things," Roxas kept his voice soft, didn't have the power to raise it anyway.
"It can't be fine, but you won't let anyone help you," Kairi had dropped back down to a low whisper, her eyes shining as she squeezed Roxas's cold, rough hands in her delicate, warm ones. She lowered her gaze and let her hair shadow her face before continuing on. "I want to help you, Roxas. But how can I do that when you refuse to let me in, when you refuse to even let me try? Roxas…" She trailed off, tears streaming down her face in earnest now.
Roxas grabbed her chin with his free hand and forced her to look at him. The apparent distress in her soft features ripped and tore at his heart, yet at the same time, seeing her face relieved some part of him, lifted some weight off his laden shoulders.
"Roxas… I want to help you." Her unspoken words had found a way into Roxas and had bore a hole into his mind. Someone had finally offered assistance to him. Not because of guilt, not because of pity, not because of anything, but because they honestly and truly just wanted to help him.
Alleviated, Roxas slowly laid his head onto Kairi's warm shoulder, and it was all he could do to not start crying. "Thank you…"
At last! Someone had bought it, opened it up, offered to listen to its center of being. At last, it could be heard, be rewound time and time again, and be cherished. At last, he could come home.
A/N: Ending was pretty rushed, yeah? Yeah. And cheesy? Ooooh, yeah. Am I glad that this is over? YESYESYES to the EXTREME.
On another note, though, I'm thinking of writing a prequel to this so I can shed a bit more light on the accident. Whether or not it'll be UP any time soon, I have no idea.
-sigh- Well, It's about 5 AM right now, and I have to be up later so I can get ready to go somewhere before heading over to my cousins' place and going to Big Bear in the morning on Sunday :D So, I'm pretty brain dead. NIGHT ALL. Review? Please?