Letters Never Sent
It had been over two and a half years since he saw her and yet she still crept into his thoughts daily. He knew that on some level it was unhealthy, entirely pathetic really. But he had long ago accepted the fact that she was perhaps the only person in his life who had ever shown any faith in him. Well that wasn't entirely true. Since his abrupt departure he had made new friends, met people who inspired him, and comrades who had become his brothers. At times it was overwhelming to think of all the people who had placed their faith in him and at times their lives in his hands. At the end of the day though it all came back to her. To the girl who challenged him on every level, the girl that chipped at the walls he had built and made him really look at himself and the world around him. In the beginning he couldn't understand why everything about her terrified and excited him. Why with a simple pout and a pleading glance of those baby blues he would fold to her every whim. Not that she ever gave him the chance to. It took distance and time for him to truly understand what she meant to him. He tried many times to put it into words, pen to paper. Letters that praised her and cursed her would litter the floor of his bunk only to be tossed before morning. Somehow the words never seemed to be enough so he decided to be the man of action he had always pretended to be. He would become someone she could be proud but first he had to be proud of himself. He graduated with honors and joined the service. It was the right thing to do; he knew that in his heart. His friends where going to face a war and he would have felt a coward had he let them go without him. Even now laying in a makeshift hospital he had no regrets. Despite all the pain, he smiled to himself. He had done his duty and he was going home. It wouldn't matter that he had never sent those letters or that her life had no doubt moved on without him. He would tell her himself with actions and words what she was to him. He knew he might still lose but he also knew he had to try. Tristan closed his eyes with the thought that no matter the outcome at the very least he would see his Mary.
