Disclaimers

Disclaimers: My Gods I wish I did own them!

Author's note: Ok, this came out INCREDIBLY different from what it was supposed to, but what the heck, ne? I hope you guys like this... It takes place right after Hades (and do emphasize on the RIGHT after Hades) as you'll read... Anyway, enjoy and review, ok?

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Illusions

By Lilas

I've never truly believed in you… Even now as I stand in front of you, admiring your power and your unbeatable beauty, I still can't decide whether what I'm seeing is real or just a dream, an illusion I will wake up from at any minute and find myself lying on my bed… I think I know better than to imagine, ne? I can't feel my body; I can't feel the pain I know I'm supposed to be in…

Why here? If I am gone from my world, why did I come here? I never thought I deserved such an honor as to come to your presence, but maybe I was wrong… Maybe what I fought for all those years, maybe everything I went through during all my fights was for you… Maybe I always knew you existed but never dared to admit.

I hated the concept of fate, of destiny… I hated to believe we didn't have a choice and that everything was destined to be such as you and your people had planed them to be. I guess that's why I always made my decisions unpredictable to everyone, even me… If you'd told me I'd fall in love for the woman I most hated, I would have laughed, but that's exactly what happened. I fell for her, the woman I most hated as a child and several times had thoughts of murder in store for her… But time changes us and it tricked my heart into loving her and eventually dying for her…

Dying… It's a strange word, isn't it? It haunted me for years as I went through my training, and years after I started to fight for her… I knew the risks and I had accepted them, but the fear never left me; it always lingered deep within my soul, my heart, my being... I always managed to evaded it and found myself running away from it as much as I could and always escaping it, but always taking another soul in my place. I couldn't out run it this time though… I tried, but it was either she or I and I had to choose myself; I had to sacrifice myself for her. I didn't have a choice; it was my duty as her guardian and my obligation to the promise I had made to myself.

How I regret that action now… I can still feel her tears on my face as I felt my blood leave my body, every droplet tearing a piece of my life away from me… And now I'm here, in front of you, still debating my soul's eyes.

You extend your hand to me and something akin to happiness fills me and I feel tingles deep within me. Ignoring the screaming voice protesting in me, I reach my hand to touch yours and a feeling that this is what I've been waiting for all these years, and for some strange reason what also feels like millennia, fills me to the point of overwhelming me. But even as I try to reach your tantalizing hand, something in me screams this isn't right, that this isn't what I really want…

I try to ignore it, to push it aside, but it keeps coming back, always screaming at me that what I'm doing is a mistake, something I'll regret forever… I ignore it and start to stand on my toes as I feel myself getting closer to your hand, my heart beating faster and my smile widening… Then a scream echoes through around us… A female scream, a scream I know all too well not to recognize, even now. I whirl around and my eyes open wide as I try to find her, the scream's owner…

I hear her name escaping my mouth and suddenly the presence behind me grows angered and reaches down to grab me, and as he does so, my surroundings shatter and fall like broken glass around us and instead of the beautiful and soothing atmosphere of heaven, the fires of hell surround us. I look back to find that the being I had almost given myself to was the one I had been trying to kill…

I back away instinctively, knowing very well that I would never be able to defeat him here, in his realm, his dimension. He raises his hand high and a black aura envelops it as he rushes it towards me; but just as I feel like I should be in an incredibly amount of pain, something warm and loving sweeps me from my feet and into the air, taking me higher and higher. As the ascent continues, my chest start burning and I place a hand on my stomach as it starts to throb with an intensity I'd never thought possible… Suddenly the amount of pain increases by ten folds and everything around me turns black and I allow the warm light to take me wherever it wants to.

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Just as I start enjoying my state, an impact shakes me awake and pain bombards my mind, threatening to send me toppling back to the world of blackness I had reluctantly come from. I slowly venture to open my eyes and as the world comes back to focus, I see her face in front of me… Her beautiful and smiling face watching me expectantly as I look at her, wondering where I am why the hell I'm hurting so much…

Then it all comes rushing back to me… His trick, her scream, her warmth saving me… I try my best to stretch the corners of my mouth into a smile, but I find myself lacking enough energy, so instead I slowly open my mouth and whisper to her… Whisper to her what I think will summarize how I feel at that moment and what I feel as I look at her. I try to fit into a couple of words how grateful I am to be alive, to be in her arms, to be able to breathe…

"Arigato, Saori-chan…" are the words I find myself whispering to her.

She smiles faintly and whispers back something only meant for me. This time I smile slightly and close my eyelids, unable to fight against the tremendous amount of pain and tiredness. I lose myself inside my mind, thoughts of her and her words haunting me as I hear her over and over whispering back her thanks, her prayer, her heart… Simple words I think will forever change my life as well as hers…