This is just a short one-shot about the continuation of Rangiku's thoughts in episode 310. I wrote this story for my favorite couple while listening to "Torn Apart" by Shiro Sagisu, hence the title. I feel like it's the perfect fit for this, so I strongly recommend that you listen to it while your reading it because it helps set the mood.

I dedicate this fanfic to my best friend Trying to Change Yesterday for introducing me to Bleach and the wide world of anime. Thanks, for supporting me and BETAing my stories!

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its contents that belongs to Tite Kubo. Trust me, if I did own Bleach I wouldn't have let Gin die.


You've gone away, but you didn't leave behind even a keepsake to remember you by.

That's what I didn't like about you.

Suddenly you were right in front of me, walking away, without telling me where you were going again. I reached out to you, but all too soon you were gone again. It was all just an illusion.

A single snowflake landed in my palm. I knew it was from the Captain practicing with Hyorinmaru, but I wanted to believe it was a gift from you, reminding me about the day we both decided to become Shinigami. I clutched it to my chest, cherishing it.

They're moving on. Neither Shuhei nor Renji were at the barracks. They must be somewhere brushing up on their skills and strengths. I need to as well.

You're right.

If you had left behind a keepsake, it would have probably kept me from moving forward. You must have certainly seen that weakness in me.

Thank you, Gin. That's what I…

I looked up at the stunning, blue sky and all I can think about is how they remind me of your eyes. Gin. I can't stop the tear from falling down my face.

That's what I loved about you.

I have accepted that your…dead. I have accepted that you will no longer be in this world. But I refuse to believe that you have left me. Because I know that you haven't.

Rukia has been helping me get through this. She told me something that made me sure you're here with me. She told me a story about when Lieutenant Shiba was still alive and training her. Lieutenant Shiba said that a heart was formed between two people when they first meet, and that if you entrust your hearts to your friends, it will continue to live on in them.

I believe that. My heart was formed the day I met you. I had no one, I was alone. But the day I met you was the day I was truly born. It was the birthday you gave me. You were my silver ray of light.

I couldn't stop myself from crying even more.

Gin, you didn't betray me. I know that now. I know you wanted to protect me. That's why I swear to you that I will become stronger. I'll get stronger so that your actions will not have been in vain. I'll get stronger for you, just like you got stronger for me. I swear it.

I can still remember the time when I fell in love with you.

Flasback

Rangiku woke up with a scream. She snapped up, clutching her hand to her throat. Sweat was falling off her forehead and her breath was coming out in quick pants.

"Rangiku?" Gin asked from across the room. He was standing by the window of their old house, they one they used to live in together back in the Rukongai District. It was snowing out.

"Are ya alright Rangiku?" he asked, a look of worry on his face. It was the first time she had ever seen him with look of any emotion.

"Y-yes, I'm fine… I just had a bad dream," she replied, regaining her composure.

"Well, I don't believe ya," he said. He walked over to her and sat down beside her. He gently caressed her cheek with his hand.

"What was the dream bout?" he asked kindly.

"I-I don't remember." she said.

"Good. Then it can't scare ya anymore." He opened his arms and she gladly accepted them. He took her in his embrace and she laid her head on his chest. She felt so safe in his arms, like nothing bad could ever happen to her as long as she was in his arms.

Right before Rangiku was about to fall into unconsciousness she asked Gin a question. "Gin?" she asked hazily.

"Yes?" he replied.

"When I wake up in the morning will you still be here? You have a bad habit of leaving me without telling be where your going." she said.

Gin was taken aback. "Yes. I'll be here." he complied.

"You promise?" she asked.

"I promise."

And with that she stayed in his embrace until she fell asleep.

End of Flashback

Gin… The truth is that day, when you asked me what I dreamed about and I said I forgot, I lied.

I did remember that dream. I remember it like it was yesterday, even though I tried so hard to forget it. I dreamt that I woke up the next day and you weren't there. I went out looking for you everywhere, but no matter where I looked I couldn't find you. You left me. It was the worst nightmare I could ever have.

I want you to hold me, like you did that day. I want to be in your arms again. To fell that warm, safe feeling again. I want you with me, by my side.

And I know someday you will be by my side. Because death isn't the end. When a bond is formed, a piece of the heart is formed. You have my heart and I have yours. Your heart will always be living inside me, keeping me safe. And I'll keep it safe.

Until the day we meet again. Gin.


Well, there it is, my first fanfic. Please review! Constructive criticism is always appreciated.