Disclaimer ~ All rights and ownership of the characters from the Maze Runner belong to James Dashner, I just borrowed them for a bit of fun. Enjoy!


In the soft light of late afternoon, Chuck wandered through the Glade despondently. He'd been here for a full two weeks and was still feeling a little lost, and majorly left out. As the youngest boy sent up in the box, he felt like the others delighted in picking on him, teasing him. When he asked questions, the others just seemed to laugh and make fun of him. He sat down with his back up against a large shady tree and heaved a miserable sigh, giving in and sniffling just a little because there was no one around to rip on him for it.

He was just a kid, for shuck sake! How was he supposed to know about all that more adult stuff?

It had all started innocently enough. Chuck had been trying to find a place to sit and eat his dinner, moving through the small groups of friends that always formed at meals. When he finally managed to squeeze himself onto a bench with a group of three other boys, he smiled winningly at them; they rolled their eyes but didn't tell him to leave. Chuck tried to mind his own, he really did, digging into his stew and nodding along with the mostly confusing discussion the other boys were having.

"I swear to God, man, being stuck up here with nothing but GUYS is a freakin' nightmare. Those assholes can't be bothered to put us out of our misery, send up a few girls?" One of the boys complained loudly, barbs of irritation prickling his words. "I mean, come on! They're gonna trap us all here, fine, whatever. But no freakin' girls? What a load of clunk!"

"Like any girl would want a piece of a slinthead like you!" The second boy retorted, causing the third to snort out a high pitched laugh.

"Yeah, if we ever did get a girl up here, she'd probably take one look at your ugly shuckin' face and throw herself down the box-hole!" The third claimed with a mischievous grin. "The only girls who'd have a go at you are Rosy Palm and Thumbalina!" All three boys dissolved into snickers at that comment; Chuck let out a chuckle himself, even if he didn't get the joke.

"I'm telling you," The first boy stated confidently, "I've got a way. If there were chicks here, they'd be lining up and begging for a taste of this." He wiggled his pathetic excuses for eyebrows; Chuck thought they looked more like half-dead caterpillars than any kind of facial adornment.

The second boy leaned a little closer to the first, dropping his voice a little so that their conversation wouldn't carry to other ears. The boys appeared to have forgotten all about Chuck, and the kid grinned, happy to feel included.

"You know," the second boy said quietly, "you could always ask one of the other guys for a hand. I know there's more than a few that are willing. Hell, you've probably heard the rumors; you could find one willing to give you a freakin' ride, if you're that desperate."

"Shuck that!" The first boy exclaimed loudly, "Blue may not be my favorite damn color to wear, but I'll shuckin' kiss a griever before I'll bop a guy!"

"You're not wearing any blue." Chuck piped up, and all three heads turned to him, incredulous. "But if you did, I'm sure it'd look fine on you. If you really don't like it though, I'm sure they can find you a different color when you need a change of clothes."

The first boy sneered at Chuck, a malicious amusement on his face. "Shanks who clunk their pants like babies and suck their thumbs at night should find someone else to pester. You're just a little kid with no shuckin' clue. Go play somewhere else, kid, and let the big boys talk!"

The three boys laughed long and hard at that, Chuck standing up hastily enough to knock his mostly empty plate to the ground. His face was beet red with embarrassment as the boys howled all the louder at his obvious confusion and discomfort. Not trusting himself to speak, Chuck turned away quickly and walked away as fast as he could, barely stopping himself from putting his hands over his ears to block out the taunting laughter.

Now with his back to a tree and a runny nose, he tried to console himself.

It's not my fault I didn't know what they were talking about; nobody's ever told me what being blue meant! And what's a ride? There's nothing to ride around here, no horses or bikes or nothing! It doesn't make any sense!
Feeling heroically stupid and completely sorry for himself, Chuck was so lost in his own little pity party that he didn't notice another person approaching until a long lean form dropped cross legged in front of him.

"What's up, green bean? Y'okay?"

Chuck nodded, swiping at his nose with the back of his hand. While the guy in front of him could be pretty bossy sometimes, and kind of snarky at others, he'd never been cruel or harsh with Chuck. He'd been really patient with him, actually, keeping an eye on him and helping him learn how things in the Glade worked.

"Yeah, I'm fine Newt. Just thinking."

"Right," Newt said, his eyes shrewd as he studied the young boy. "If you're all fine and dandy then, tell me why're you sitting here all alone, snifflin' like a girlie? Anything to do with those stupid clunks at dinner?"

Chuck looked away, not wanting to talk about it. Still, curiosity about the conversation buzzed in his head. Maybe he could ask Newt, Newt wasn't a total slinthead like those other guys. Maybe he'd answer instead of just laughing at him, like some of the others surely would.

"Hey Newt...what does 'wearing blue' mean?"

Newt cocked an eyebrow, confused. "What the bloody hell do YOU mean ?"

Embarrassed, Chuck managed to relate the majority of the conversation to Newt, looking forward to at least getting some clarity on the subjects discussed. Toward the end of the recount, Chuck felt himself firing up with righteous indignation.

"...and then I said that he wasn't wearing blue, but it prob'ly looked fine on him, and then he called me a baby who clunks his pants and sucks his thumb! He said I was just a little kid and should go play somewhere else!"

Newt sighed heavily, rolling his eyes skyward and wearing a pained 'why me' expression on his face.

"Kid, he was talking about how bloody horny he is, now what shuckin' color his shirt is!" Seeing the boy's baffled expression, Newt tried again. "Horny? Got the itch? He's got a fire down below? Get it?" Chuck's eyes widened, showing nothing but confusion.

"He's on fire?" Chuck whispered, horrified. "No wonder he was so mean to me. That's gotta hurt something awful."

Newt hissed out a breath between his teeth; his frustration clearly visible. "Greenie, no one ever told you 'bout the 'birds and the bees'?"

"Well, birds are feathery and fly, and bees are little buzzin' bugs that - "

"Shut up." Newt said curtly, but not unkindly. This was going to be one long, uncomfortable, awkward conversation for them both. "So, here's the way of it. When a guy gets to a certain age..."


The next evening


Chuck walked towards the med-hut, deep in thought. Newt had talked to him for almost an hour the night before, explaining how a boy's body changed as he started to mature, how "needs" and "urges" started to make themselves known as a boy changed and started to grow up. He talked about sex, and masturbating, about hair growing and voices changing. He told the boy all sorts of weird terms used to describe sexual acts. It sounded like the weirdest and most uncomfortable thing Chuck had ever heard of. At the end of the discussion, Newt had assured Chuck that the boy would get used to it, and if he had any other questions, he could ask Jeff the med-jack. As he made his way to talk to the Glade medic, Chuck couldn't help but think that growing up sounded like a right load of clunk.

When he made it to the door of the hut he hesitated, feeling shy and embarrassed; what if Jeff laughed at his questions? Just as he was mustering up the courage to step in and just blurt it out, he heard voices coming from the back of the hut. He backed away stiffly, slipping silently around the side of the building to wait; he didn't want anyone else to know about his "education". He peered through the loosely bundled sticks of the wall, trying to figure out who was inside, and how long it would take them to leave. He jerked a little in surprise to see that it was none other than Newt, holding an intense discussion with the med-jack. He could just hear what they were saying.

"Well, it wouldn't be the first time," Jeff stated firmly, staring at Newt. "I'll take care of it. Drop your drawers, hands on the table. "

Newt jerked a shoulder sharply, muttering something under his breath. He turned away from Jeff, the musical metal tinkle of his belt buckle was absurdly loud in the silence. In one quick move he shoved his pants down to his ankles, leaning down and supporting himself on the rough wood with his arms, his bare backside fully presented to Jeff.

"Just do it, would you." Newt griped, his voice a little husky with embarrassment. "I don't have all bloody day!"

"You've gotta relax, man. This is gonna hurt like a mother if you don't relax."

Newt's voice was breathy, and shaking. "Just get on with it!"

Chuck turned and looked away, clapping a hand over his mouth to stop himself from making a sound. They were going to do it! If he tried to slink away now, they'd surely hear him and figure out someone was out there. Caught between morbid curiosity and mortification, Chuck tried to ignore the goings on inside the hut. Unable to resist, he snuck another peek inside.

Jeff sighed, moving to stand directly behind the pale boy. Leaning forward a little, he reached his off hand under the hunched boy, placing it on his lower stomach to help support his weight.

"Relax," Jeff insisted in a hissy whisper, "This ain't the first time, and sure as clunk it won't be the last. Ease up man, let me get to work."

Chuck turned and leaned up against the building, closing his eyes tight so that he wouldn't be tempted to peek again, covering his ears with his hands. This was personal, private. He shouldn't even be here. He tried to think of something, anything else. Unfortunately, even with his hands over top, his ears still picked up some of the sounds from inside.

Shuffling, quick breaths, a muttered curse.

"I dunno Newt, I'd hate to hurt you. You sure you want me to just..."

"I'm fine, just get it over with! Stop bloody torturing me and just do it!"

"Whatever, you're the boss."

A sharp gasp from Newt, a painful and shocked intake of breath.

"Sorry, sorry! I'm trying to be gentle!" Jeff said through clenched teeth.

"Shuck...just...go for it." Newt, almost panting, now.

"Maybe we should just wait for a - "

"I swear to God, if you stop now, I'll kill you myself. Stop being a shank and just bloody do it!"

"Careful what you wish for." Jeff warned darkly. Then...

"Ahhh Jeff! Buggering Christ on a Crutch!"

Chuck hunched his shoulders, trying to drown out the gasps and groans from beyond the thin wall at his back. It felt like he stood there for hours, desperately waiting for the two boys to finish up and leave so that he could slip away unnoticed. He must have zoned out after a while; he barely managed to pull his brain back together when he heard the boys moving towards the door at the front of the hut. Finally, he'd be able to leave. Please don't let them see me, Chuck begged silently.

"Good, that." Newt commented casually to Jeff. "Let's do that again sometime, say, week from never? That work for you?"

"Oh slim it you big baby, it wasn't that bad." Jeff scoffed, "You'll probably be sore for a couple of days, though, so take care of yourself accordingly."

"Yeah well, if you weren't so bloody rough I'd ...Chuck! What are you doing over there?"

Chuck pushed off from the wall, face crimson as he tried to stutter out excuses. "I wasn't...I was just...I was going to...I gotta go! Bye!"

The boy turned and sprinted into the underbrush, crashing through ferns and stumbling over fallen branches until he was out of sight. The two in the hut looked at each other, mystified.

"What was all that about?" Jeff asked.

"Shuck if I know. Kid probably just had a couple of sex questions for you, and was too bloody embarrassed to ask you with me here. I had to give him 'the talk' last night." Newt sighed, shaking his head.

Jeff nodded, understanding. "Yeah, well, at least he's got the basics now. He'll come ask when he's ready. Poor little greenie, he's so young." Shaking himself a little to clear his head, Jeff looked back at Newt with open curiosity. "Speaking of asking questions, you never did tell me how you ended up with so many nasty splinters in your skinny white ass. What's the matter, you scratch an itchy cheek with a shuckin branch?"

Newt's cheeks colored ever so slightly. "I was having a clunk in the woods and a beetle-blade popped up out of no where, right at my feet. Startled the bloody hell out of me and I fell. I managed to dodge the mess, but ended up arse first on a bloody buggering tree trunk." At Jeff's quick laugh, Newt continued belligerently. "Go ahead and laugh, let's see you keep your nerve when one of those little bastards pops up under you when you're occupied! And did you have to dig so deep? I won't be able to sit down for a week!"

"Quit whining, it's done and over with. All the wood's out of your ass, be grateful. Maybe one of the guys will be willing to kiss your boo-boo all better." Jeff laughed, waving non-chalantly as he walked back towards the homestead.

Newt stayed where he was, scowling and rubbing a hand over his raw, tender, scratched up buttock. Sulking a little at the irritating pain, he suddenly remembered that he was supposed to meet Alby over in the east corner of the forrest tonight; the dark stocky leader was probably already there and waiting for him. Newt headed off into forest, limping a little more than usual, considering. Eyes lighting up with mischief, a smug little grin on his face, he quickened his pace. Maybe he'd just take Jeff's advice.

He was sure he could convince Alby to kiss it better for him.


Author's note ~ The premise is a fairly common one, but as I haven't seen any eavedropping fics for the Mazerunner, I figured I'd throw one out there. Just a bit of humor and fluff; I hope it made you smile.

~Ruby