DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TOUHOU PROJECT!
"YOUMU! BRING ME SOME FOOD! Gosh, the service is TERRIBLE around here!" Yuyuko yelled across the house.
"COMIIIIING MOTHER!" Youmu called from the kitchen.
"I'M NOT YOUR MOM, I'M YOUR LOVER!" Yuyuko yelled back.
"OH. WELL, WOULD YOU MIND IT IF WE DIDN'T YELL ACORSS THE HOUSE?"
"UM...YES!"
"OKAY!"
"HEY, LET'S GO ON A DATE! I BET THEY'LL HAVE BETTER SERVICE AT A RESTAURANT!"
"OKAY!"
And so they magically teleported to the Scarlet Devil Diner.
"Hello, and welcome to the Scarlet Devil Diner! May I take your order?" Sakuya asked, holding a notebook thing in her hand with a pen.
"Um...I'll have a..." Youmu trailed off.
"I'll have a thing of sushi with a side of rice and another order of egg drop soup with a side of rice and some beef teriyaki and all that junk."
"Would you like anything else?"
"I-" Youmu was cut off again.
"Nope, that should do it!"
"M'kay. Bye." And Sakuya walked off, looking proud of herself that she took someone's order.
"I bet she didn't even write all that down," Yuyuko smirked.
"Yeah, I bet she didn't," Youmu agreed.
Suddenly, there was a poof and Sanae appeared. "WHOOPS! SORRY!" Sanae exclaimed. And then she disappeared.
"Bitch," Yuyuko mumbled.
Suddenly there was another poof and both Remilia and Flandre Scarlet appeared. "Hello! We are the owners of this diner. Are you enjoying this place so far?"
"Um...yeah, we kind of want our food..." Yuyuko groaned.
Flandre poofed away while Remilia stayed at the table. "She'll be back in a second. Just wait a moment..."
Flandre poofed back into the room with Sakuya at her side, holding a tray of food.
"This is only half of it..." Sakuya groaned as Flandre set down another tray on the table.
"We'll be back with the rest," Flandre told them. And then they poofed away again.
"What the fuck is going on?" Yuyuko asked Remilia.
"Oh, they're poofing again. Flandre does this from time to time; she just can't stop poofing places. Once she poofed in on Sanae, Kanako, and Suwako having a threesome. It was pretty embarrassing," Remilia informed them. "You know, I think I'm going to get Eirin to take a look at Flandre. I think she's a bit...special...in the head," Remilia finished. "I hope you're enjoying your food so far! BYEEEEE!" Remilia yelled and then poofed out of the room.
"Wow, they really like to poof, don't they?" Youmu asked Yuyuko.
"Lol, yeah."
"What was with that 'Lol'? It was kind of random."
"Idk."
"STOP USING TEXT ABBREVIATIONS!" Youmu exclaimed, jumping up from the table. The whole diner was empty except for them, so it was totally okay.
Then Flandre, Sakuya, and Remilia all poofed back in. "Here's the rest," Sakuya told them, setting down the food.
"Thanks!"
Yuyuko and Youmu dug into the food, savoring every bite. But, when the check came around, Youmu wasn't all that happy.
"Your total is 1,000,000,000 Yen. Would you like to pay cash or credit?" Sakuya asked whenever she came around with the check.
"YUYUKO! WHAT THE FUCK!? WHY DO YOU HAVE TO EAT SO MUCH!?" Youmu exclaimed.
"Well, it's not my fault. It's Marisa's fault," Yuyuko retorted.
"MARISA?!" Youmu and Sakuya exclaimed at the same time.
Flandre and Remilia poked their heads out of the kitchen door. "MARISA?!"
Marisa randomly poofed in front of them. "MARISA?! Oh, wait, that's meeeeee!"
"How did Marisa cause you to eat so much?" Youmu asked Yuyuko, astonished.
"I don't know. I just needed someone to blame," Yuyuko answered.
"Hey, peoples! Ooh, beef teriyaki!" Marisa said loudly, grabbing a handful of beef teriyaki into her hand and shoving it down her throat. "Welp, if nobody needs me, I'm outta here!" Marisa exclaimed as she poofed away.
"What's up with everyone poofing around Gensokyo today?" Sakuya asked the two ghosts.
They shrugged. "I don't know."
"BUT I DO! HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!" Koishi laughed, appearing out of nowhere. "Today is national poof day!" And then she poofed away. Again.
"Well, that was totally needed. Anyway, your total is 1,000,000,000 Yen. Cash or credit?" Sakuya asked them.
Youmu groaned. "We'll pay cash..."
Yuyuko pulled out her huge over-sized purse and handed Sakuya 1,000,000,000 Yen. She had to count it all out in front of her, which took FOREVER, since Yuyuko isn't very experienced in counting.
"Okay, let's gooooo!" Yuyuko said excitedly as she and Youmu poofed away.
They arrived back in Hakugyokurou with a poof. Yuyuko took Youmu's hand in hers and led her to her room. She shut the door and began to undress Youmu.
"Yuyuko-sama, what are you doing?!" Youmu exclaimed, shocked.
"Relax..."
-The next morning: 3:00 AM-
Youmu woke up and looked over at a clock on the wall. It read 3:00 in the morning.
Great.
Then she looked down at herself and noticed that she was naked.
Great.
Youmu looked to the left of her and noticed Yuyuko sleeping there.
...great.
Youmu climbed out of bed and put her discarded clothes on. She crept out of Yuyuko's room once fully clothed, but was caught in the doorway by Yuyuko.
"Youmu? Where are you going?" Yuyuko asked her.
"Uh...I...was...YUYUKO-SAMA!" Youmu exclaimed, running to Yuyuko's bed and jumping on her.
"Mmm...Youmu..." Yuyuko moaned into Youmu's hair. "What were you doing out of bed?"
"I was going to go and check on the plants. I wanted to make sure that they weren't freezing out there," she whispered to Yuyuko.
The two lay in silence for a moment. Then Yuyuko spoke up.
"Youmu?"
"Yes, Yuyuko-sama?"
Yuyuko kissed Youmu's forehead gently. "I love you."
"Yuyuko-sama..." Youmu breathed, kissing Yuyuko briefly on the lips. "I love you too."
