A Guide to HP Next Generation Fan Fiction Cliché

Everybody loves a good cliché.

Like every other story about the unfortunate (or fortunate) children of Harry Potter and the rest of the Weasleys, this one has to be centered around Harry's children (because let's face it- who wants to read stories about some Lucy Weasley or Louis Weasley or something like that).

Because the war is over, the Dark Lord vanished and beaten and most Death Eaters arrested, the NextGen story usually doesn't have any mysterious and terrible, death-related plot twist, except: Love triangles, teenage pregnancy, Yule Ball drama (doesn't matter that there's no Triwizard Tournament), forced Potion class partners, family drama, love-hate relationships and (most important) broom closet snogging. Basically a Hollywood Hogwarts.

The main characters are (usually): James Sirius Potter, Albus Severus Potter and Lily Luna Potter and their cousins and companions.

Now, every story must begin with describing the main character(s), to express how good-looking they are, because nobody wants to read about average or unattractive (Merlin forbid!) characters.

James Sirius is usually described as amazingly attractive and gorgeously handsome guy. If you want people to like him, he has to be good looking. 90% of the time he has black, sexy messy hair (not red, he's not a Weasley!), chocolate/hazel eyes, TALL and muscular (you know- because of Quidditch). Gotta be tall, because handsome guys=tall guys. He can't be short like Ginny, always tall. Taller than Dumbledore. Obviously because he's named after James Sr. and Sirius, he must take after them. Confident, talented, popular, Quidditch star, a bit arrogant, hilarious, smart and just awesome I guess. Oh, and he has a fan club. Doesn't matter that he's acting like a jerk, that's okay because a) he's the main character and b) he's a Gryffindor. The entire female population at Hogwarts loves him, even professors and ghosts and pets. And there's always that ONE girl who's gonna "change him" by the end of the story. Very similar to James/Lily's epic romance. All in all, James Sirius is like a womanizing hybrid of James and Sirius.

Now Albus is a different story. As we know he looks like Harry, but he's beautified. (He's gotta be, every member of Potter family is a part-time model). Attractive, EMERALD green eyed (has to be emerald), messy, black-haired Albus or 'Al'. Try not to mention the name Severus, it's not really attractive and some people are sensitive about Snape and his delightful character. Al is mysterious and emo like. He's a Slytherin, ambitious and he's dark. But that's okay. It 'hot' kind of dark, like Draco Malfoy. He has daddy issues and befriends Scorpio Malfoy. Because of the He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named or Cursed Child book, Scorbus is a popular ship and it contradicts another popular ship Scorose (mini version of Dramione). Sometimes gay, sometimes not. He's gotta be smart, talented at magic (CANNOT be a magic failure, like he is in Cursed Child- has to be powerful, he's a Potter after all!) Basically, it's like writing and OoTP Harry- angsty and grumpy and full of hormones. Oh, and he's gotta be on the Slytherin Quidditch team! Because in most stories there's an exciting and deathly game of Quidditch rivalry between the Potter brothers, and somebody's gonna die.

Finally, there's Lily Luna. Boy, where to start? First of all, she's FIERY. Fiery red hair (sometimes described as flaming river of rose petals, if you want to be delicate), fiery personality, fiery breath, fiery beauty, fiery talk and walk. You have to repeat the word 'fiery' at least once when describing her, unless you want readers to forget about her fieriness. Another adjectives: bright, blazing, fierce, flaming, vivid, vibrant... Sort of like a dragon. 100% like Ginny. Looks like her, acts like her. You won't do wrong if you write her like a mini-Ginny, people LOVE that. And she's FIERCE. Doesn't matter that she's petite (you can't say short, it's petite- it sounds nicer). Another Quidditch fanatic, usually said to be a great talent. No, fiery great talent! Sometimes involved with Scorpius Malfoy, sometimes Lorcan/Lysander Scamander, sometimes with a new OC. Doesn't matter, because she's fiery and she's an independent girl goddammit, she doesn't need a man!

So those are the Potter kids. They're amazing in their own ways. Remember, the story has to maintain at least one of these characters if you want your story to be popular, because they're Harry's kids and naturally people are interested in them.

Aaand there are the Weasleys…. The other family.

I'm gonna start with Ron and Hermione's kids, because they are also fairly popular to some extent.

Rose Weasley. Mini Hermione, what can I say. Except she has red hair. Sometimes it's bushy, sometimes curly. Usually described as average looking, except when the writer is a hardcore Scorose shipper and he/she gets a little carried away with our main girl (Rose). In that case she's beautiful. Personality like, she's a mini Hermione most of the time, with a bit of Ron in her. Intelligent, studious, dramatic and a control freak. Rarely is she relaxed and a normal freaking girl. In most NexGen s, Rose is the narrator and she's there to tell us about her romance with 'Malfoy'. Scorpius is always 'Malfoy' in the beginning of the story, because at that time they are sworn enemies, they hate each other and she can't call him by his first name- they're enemies! Their only connection is Albus. But it doesn't matter that they hate each other or not, the important thing is that we now have the NextGen Trio. Yay! Albus, Rose and Scorpius all the way! As the story continues Scorose becomes friends/ friends with benefits, they snog a little and in the FanFiction Epilogue we see them with their children (who always have some weird pure-blood names): Taurus, Hercules, Pandora, Urania, Orion and Phoenix.

Next is Hugo Weasley. He's not important. Enough said. He's a background character. He may be Ron and Hermione's son, but because he didn't say a word in the Epilogue (Love-Mush Chapter), he doesn't get a lot of screen time. Could be a Gryffindor, Ravenclaw or a Hufflepuff. More and more he's a Hufflepuff in recent stories because the writers see him as an extra and someone has to be in (poor, forgettable) Hufflepuff house. I have NO IDEA WHY, but for some reason whenever he's described in fiction it's always: short, chubby, bushy-haired, freckled, big-toothed and AWKWARD. He's always shorter and uglier than the Potter boys. (You gotta remember that, because the Potter boys have to be the most handsome guys in the family). He's awkward around girls, nerdy, Quidditch failure, basically think of all the negative traits Ron and Hermione have and give them to poor Hugo. There you go! I do think a lot of writers are mistaking him for Hugo 'Hurley' Reyes from Lost. Don't know why (because of the name maybe?!) Apparently someone in NextGen fics has to be the next Neville Longbottom- the role has landed to poor Hugo.

Alright, if you're still here, I will continue with the rest of the Weasleys, but in shorter context. There's simply too many of them.

The rest of the Weasley are similar to Hugo I'd say. Most of them are just extras, rarely are they important to the plot. They are just noisy, funny, time-killing cousins. The plot usually revolves around James, Albus, Lily, Rose or sometimes Scorpius. The rest of the family are meant to be side-characters.

The oldest Weasley/Potter cousin: Victoire Weasley. Ahh, I can hear the hate and jealousy from a lot of writers. Here's the thing: she's a Veela, blonde, beautiful and Teddy Lupin's girlfriend. People either love her or hate her. There's no in between. She's either a complete Mary Sue amazingly gorgeous girl mythological creature OR she's a complete obnoxious BITCH. Most of the time, it's the second one. Why? Because she's Fleur Delacour's daughter. Some people don't like Fleur which equals not liking her daughter. So just remember when you write her that she's a twat, it's not like she was raised by Bill Weasley or something like that… No, she's apparently awful for some reason. Also Teddy Lupin is a fairly a popular character and some people can't understand how a girl like Victoire can be with a boy like Teddy (even though we don't know anything about their personalities). She doesn't play Quidditch, because she could break a nail. Poor Vic.

Dominque Weasley. This is an easy one. PUNK-ROCK Dominique! has overpowered the site. We rarely see her as some quiet and thoughtful girl. But here's the thing: Unlike Victoire, Dominique or 'Dom', doesn't get a lot of hate from writers or fans. Weird, right? She's spunky, temperamental, loud and noisy and sometimes Quidditch obsessed. She apparently inherited all Bill's "cool" personality traits. Also pretty (a little less than Victoire), but that's okay, because the writers is just showing you how more AWSOME Dominique is compared to her prissy older sister. All in all, a rebel Dom is your must have if you write a NextGen fic. (Consider it like a little black dress, you HAVE to have it in your wardrobe).

The youngest Weasley/Delacour: Louis Weasley. The non-existent Weasley boy. Seriously, he doesn't exist. But when he IS mentioned he is either: gay (because the writer is trying not be seen as homophobic, so someone has to be gay) OR a Veela man. When I say Veela Man I mean he has looong blonde locks (rarely red), sultry look and can charm people around him. Really feminine kind of guy (because he's part Veela). Think of Orlando Bloom the Elf in LotR. But still, poor Louie doesn't get a lot of screen time these days. His sisters overshadow him completely.

George and Angelina's kids:

Fred Weasley II. James's companion, best friend and a clown. Enough said. I think people sometimes forget the fact Angelina Johnson is his mother and they describe him as just another pale, red haired, freckle-faced Weasley. It's like George gave birth to him and not Angelina. He is rarely described as dark-haired or hot because the Potter boys are the only ones to have black hair and be good looking (so he doesn't steal their spotlight). Fred II or "Freddie" in fan fiction is there to entertain us, to make us chuckle and laugh, to make us laugh AT him, to be a class clown. But because he is James's friend he CANNOT be better than James, just good enough to make us like him. Usually a beater or an announcer at Quidditch matches.

Roxanne Weasley. Very masculine for some reason. Maybe because of the name..? It's not "delicate" name like Lily, so Roxanne or "Roxy" is usually a burly, wild and Quidditch fanatic kind of girl. Portrayed as a lesbian sometimes (someone has to be). Rude with curly big hair (sometimes red, sometimes black). And I swear more and more she's said to be some kind of a slag. Let's blame music band "The Police" with their song "Roxanne" for this. Ruthless beater, with biceps and loud personality. But on the bright side, sometimes she's not even mentioned and completely forgotten in fan fiction.

Percy's kids:

Here's the thing: He has two daughters. At least one has to be exactly like Percy with his looks, glasses, annoying and prudish personality and obnoxious attitude. Not everybody in Weasley/Potter family is super cool and nice, so Percy's daughter is there to fill the role of black sheep. Who cares about Percy anyway, right?! In other words readers have to hate her. If he's lucky it's only one daughter. If he's not lucky, both of his daughters are like this. And everybody's supposed to hate them!

If one daughter is like Percy, the other one has to be opposite of Percy. It's nature, a law. To spice things up. The other daughter is sometimes nice, sometimes has a knack for music, art, Quidditch, animals…whatever. But nothing spectacular to distract our attention. We have to remember the Potters are the "amazing ones" and we have to focus on them.

SOOO that's it. The only one left is dear Teddy Lupin. A genuinely nice guy. Good looking, smart and caring. His only flaw, to some writers, is that he's dating Victoire. Even though he's raised by his grandmother Andromeda, in some fics he's 100% a Potter, raised by Harry himself (sometimes even calls him "dad").

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Author's Note: Even I like to read about a good clichéd fanfiction, so don't take this seriously. Kudos!