1.Sometimes it is to much to bear, the memories suffocating. He can't bear to speak about it, but Jem understands. He simply comes and wraps his arms around will in an a gentle embrace and holds him, just holds him, while Will struggles to suppress the memories, to banish the laughing darkness that fights to control his thoughts, and to find the Will Herondale of his past, the one who was sweet and kind and caring...

The one who would have never, ever let his friends down.

2.One day, as they are training, there is an odd look in Will's eyes, and for an instant, for a single instant, the hard shell he has built around himself cracks, and he allows Jem to see into his soul.

3.Jem is not scared of death. He has faced in multiple times, both in battle, and attacks from his illness. No, after weeks of torture and pain, years of slow agony and attacks, a lifetime of Shadowhunter training, he is not afraid to die.

What frightens him so much is what is going to happen to Will once he's gone.

4.As the light leaves Jem's pale silver eyes, and the hand gripping Will's goes slack, the world seems to end for a moment, and everything is perfectly still in silent, frozen in a feeling of disbelief, of unreality.

And then the night is shattered by Will's scream.

5.It was only Jem who could calm Will down, only Jem who could tame the wild mood swings and outbursts, only Jem who came as close to understanding Will as you could get. But if there was anything Tessa had learned in the years she had known the parabati, it was that no one, not even Jem, understood Will, and no one had loved him the way Jem did, and no one ever could accept Will for simply the broken boy he was, accept his own parabati, the quiet, gentle, silver-haired boy who was willing to shoulder his friend's challenges, even when he was already knocking on death's door.

6.Will had always said he didn't care, that his greatest wish was to not love anything, to hate the world with all his heart, and face whatever hell he had to in the afterlife. It was only when Tessa watched Will care for Jem, when she watched him gently wipe the blood from his parabati's clothes, and sing a soft song in Chinese to his sleeping friend, that she knew Will did care. He cared probably more than he wanted to, when it came to his parabati.

7.The two of them were not alike at all, complete opposites; gentle and fierce, calm and wild, pale and dark, but when it came to protecting each other, they were exactly alike. They would die for each other, and that friendship was the thing that held their world together, that kept them from falling apart, even when life seems to cruel to live anymore.

8.Even though Will knows his time with his best friend is limited, even though he knows they only have a few short months left togather, as he watches Jem throw back his head and laugh, a look of pure, limitless joy on his face, his silver hair gleaming like polished silver in the sunlight, it seems like they have forever, that Jem is healthy and strong, and they have a lifetime of friendship stretching out before them. It is only when Jem starts to cough that Will is forced back into the cold reality of his best friend's impending death, and puts a hand on Jem's shoulder, supporting him, and remebering that for now, he still has Jem.

It is only later when he looks back on that day, that he realizes just how precious those moments are, because you never really know when those blissful moments are going to dive into the terrifying nightmare of pain and sorrow.

Which is why, even if it is just for a moment, he allows himself to laugh too.