She peered through the binoculars, digital lenses zooming while text crawled along the bottom of the display, scanning a distant ridge her locator told her was their next destination. It rose against the dusky sky, a monolith of sandstone edges eroded sharp.
"I see it just ahead," lowering the binoculars and giving them back to her companion, "Should be there by midday if we pass through that plain ahead."
"If the weather holds," he said, clipping the binoculars to his pack, "I still don't like traveling without cover. That last sandstorm nearly caught us." Tala whined from underneath him.
"Nearly caught us," she grinned, carefree for a fleeting moment, "Where is your sense of adventure? I thought you would be used this by now."
"I must have left it back on the ship," he deadpanned, "Well, if we are going, let's go. I know you hate this heat."
"Right." She pulled her worn traveling cloak up over her montrals, the day wasn't quite hot yet, but would be soon, forcing them to stop until at least two of the suns set. "Ready, Cu?" she asked, patting the shaggy warg on his broad head. He turned his snout towards her and huffed as if to say of course.
The two wargs made excellent time across the rocky plain, trotting alongside each other until Ahsoka prompted Cu ahead. His paws big enough to not fall into the dry and cracked ground of the… yes, not a plain but an ancient lakebed or shallow sea floor. It sprawled out in nearly all directs, touching the sky on the horizon. The foothills behind them and the distant ridge in front of them the only features on this backwater planet. Even the sky was a nondescript brown.
The locals had said only wargs were able to navigate the desert, ships would leave the tiny spaceport looking for game and never return. Superstitious nonsense, but they needed to blend in. So officially, they were out hunting cervelk- the elaborate antlers of which were valuable as decorations or were ground up and ingested to allegedly extend your life, and more mundanely the meat and hide a staple of the locals lifestyle. Ahsoka was pretty sure the tiny elderly human woman who explained this to them was running a racket. After all, she had grinned her three tooth grin and rented them Tala, Cu and a box of hunting gear and expected a cut of their hunt.
But, like Rex said, they were blending in. Tourists got swindled all the time.
She turned in her seat, Tala was lagging behind. The big female warg was timid and lazy where the smaller Cu was bold and energetic, but also very sweet and affectionate. Ahsoka had woken up a few times already on this trip with a face full of cold wet warg nose.
Rex caught her eye, and hurried Tala along. His long rifle slung across his back and a couple days worth of beard on his face. Ahsoka still wasn't sure about it, hair in general was kinda strange, but they were rationing water so a shave would have to wait.
Turning back towards the ridge, Ahsoka checked her wrist locator. The compact device was tied to their ship and its much better geo-positioning system. The target had narrowed down another 12% since leaving the foothills. Hopefully this trip wouldn't be a waste of time like the others.
Up close the ridge reached up into the sky, serrated edges sharp against the haze. Four of the suns light was behind it, only one shone in front. The dim light still able to catch the intricate carvings and archways etched into the stone, not faded even though exposed to the common sandstorms of this planet.
Walking up to the solid stone archways, Ahsoka frowned. She felt nothing. Nothing but the vastness around them. Wrong again? Only rumors like the last?
She touched the warm stone.
And the Force thrummed around her. Heavy and all encompassing, but comforting. Like a blanket held by a child. Strong, but pure. A wildness untouched.
And the stone opened in front of her.
Tala and Cu were whining, nervously shifting around. Their long legs dancing as if they couldn't possibly stay still. Rex dismounted and tried to calm them, but it wasn't needed. Once the door opened all the way they bolted inside, playfully yipping.
"Hey!" Rex thundered after them, but pulled up suddenly at the entranceway and paused, "Should we go inside?" unsure.
And for the first time in a long time, Ahsoka grinned at him, sure and confident and most of all completely happy, "Yes."
The temple was old, ancient and forgotten but not empty. The Force flowed here, untouched by the roiling shadow that filled the rest of the galaxy. She pulled back her hood and breathed in, the air sweet and cool.
The entrance way was large, domed ceiling glinting overhead and bracketed by pillars inscribed in some glyphs unread for untold time. Foot steps loud and echoing in her montrals, they walked to the other end where stairs disappeared downwards into the cut stone.
"Tala, Cu stay." Rex ordered, strapping his rifle to his pack on Tala's back, his cloak pulled back revealing his sidearm. He wouldn't need it, but good luck getting him to part with it, "Shall we?"
She nodded and they started down the dark steps. It got dark enough that Rex had to crack a glowstick to see where he was going, but she had much better eyesight and her echolocation to navigate. It turned out not to be needed anyways, as the staircase seemed to grow brighter and brighter the further down they went, until the narrow passageway opened up to a large room.
It was filled with glowing plants. Or at least they looked like plants. Huge flowers with incandescent petals topped the more subdued stalks that wouldn't have looked out of place on Felucia, except well, the glowing, and that they seemed rather drained of color, just giving off a steady warm white light. They covered the entirety of the room, floor, walls and ceiling, dropping down like lanterns for some festival. Their roots pulled up and out of the mosaic tiles, leaving them in haphazard piles. Living but strangely silent, no wind to rattle the leaves or make the stalks sway. Were they pliable like any other plant? Or maybe they were crystal…
"Well, this solves our water rationing," Rex called from behind the flowers. She went to him and saw it- a rather large spring in the center of the room, the water edged by the same mosaic on the floor. At one point it probably drained to a cistern for use, but now it overflowed a crack in the edging. Little rivulets scattering out to the plants, "I'll have to test it out before drinking though."
She glanced up at him, "And shaving?"
"Dunno," he grinned, "I kinda like it."
"Looks… bristlely."
"Its not that bad."
The marking above her eye lifted, her lips curling into a smirk, "Really?" And she lifted her hand up to his face, cupping his cheek and running her fingers along his jaw. It was kinda bristlely, but soft too. Hair was still weird, but not bad. Her hand lingered.
Rex was rather still, uncertainty sluicing off of him in waves. Smirk fading, she caught his eye for a long moment before his gaze skittered away and he stepped back. Her hand dropped to her side.
"Look," he pointed past the spring, "Another doorway." He was all professionalism and crisp helpfulness. The something she had seen put away. Again.
Ahsoka turned her head, through a clearing in the luminescent plants was another intricate archway. The doors themselves had a large enameled symbol, a stylistic flower like the ones filling the room. Four large petals and four smaller variegated ones, surrounded by a halo of light.
Stepping closer she could feel the Force calling to her from beyond. This was where the true temple started. And this was where her searching finally paid off.
The Jedi Temple on Coruscant was lost to her, in more ways than one, but there were other places she could find knowledge. Libraries full of old tales and myth, and that to the uninformed were nothing but stories. Avenues that the Empire would not search in ignorance or arrogance, but that she did remember from long suffering studies that seemed ages ago.
"I feel it, here behind…"
"Go on, Commander, I will take care of things out here."
So it's back to Commander now, "I can help set up camp before-"
"You waited long enough," he interrupted, "Go on."
And she was still a little bit annoyed, but so grateful too, "I'll be back as soon as I can."
"I'll be right here."
The enameled door shut behind her, Cutting off the soft glow and pitching her into a darkness that was not mere shadow but a complete lack of light. Ahsoka waved a hand in front of her face, unable to see it with her sharp eyes. Her breath was the only sound, in what must be a vast chamber- she couldn't pick up any echoes.
But the Force shined to her inner eye. A bright path forward. She started walking.
She wasn't sure how long or how far she walked, only putting one foot in front of the other. Trusting the Force to guide her, after all she had been down this path before. Not here on a backwater in a forgotten temple, but with the other younglings of her clan to the temple on Ilum.
There she had searched the icy caverns, eyes sharp and listening intently tiny vibrations in her montrals, and found nothing. No crystals, just endless corridors.
Not until she had stopped. Closed her eyes and covered her montrals, that she felt the way. The Force making her trust. And when she had stepped forward, over what her eyes told her was a crevasse and into a place the rebounding acoustics hid from her she had found it- a crystal for her light saber.
But here, the path just continued until she couldn't sense it, a far off horizon that never drew closer.
Huffing, she plopped down and assumed a meditative stance. She had never been too fond of meditation, preferring action, but that didn't seem to be working. So she sat, quieted her mind, and focused. Her body was first, breath drawn in and then exhaled. A soothing rhythm as she drew in air deep, held it, and then let it go. Her heart rate slowed next, a strong steady beat. Finally her muscles relaxed, the anticipatory tension fading. Mastery of the physical.
The mental, however…
Ahsoka tried to calm herself, tried to only exist in the here and now, tried let go of memory. But it kept creeping back to the edges of her mind, persistent and cruel.
A pain of emptiness and loss.
She grimaced, her head shaking and eyes squeezed shut. The Force still stretched out endlessly in front of her, "Why won't it work?"
"Pain cannot be erased."
Ahsoka's eyes snapped open and she sprang to her feet, "Daughter?!"
The luminescent woman stood in front of her, pale and beautiful and statuesque, her hair and robes flowing in some unseen breeze-exactly how she looked years ago on Mortis before her death.
"How?"
She tilted her head to the side, green eyes soft, "I am here, because you are here."
Well, that was a nonanswer, "You died."
"And yet, I am speaking to you," she paused, "Or perhaps it is only you speaking… This place is what you make it."
"Great," Ahsoka muttered under her breath. Riddles and puzzles were not her specialty at all, "Can you be a bit more specific?"
Daughter frowned, "It is not a test."
Of course it is, "Of course it is," Ahsoka huffed, impatient, "It is always a test."
"And what do you wish to achieve by passing this test?"
"Light saber crystals."
Daughter shook her head, "And these you could not find elsewhere?"
"Well," Ahsoka hesitated, running through the reasons she came to a forgotten temple, "Yes, but… black market deals can still be traced and they cost a fortune."
"So instead you spend months researching ancient temples, a practice that could still be traced, and travel to half a dozen false locations, spending credits as quickly as you gain them?" her eyes grew sharp, "Crystals are crystals, are they not? Only one did you receive from Ilum, the other belonged to some long dead master."
Wincing, "When you put it like that…"
"I ask again, what do you wish to achieve?"
What didshe want?
Ahsoka did want those crystals. Her hips felt empty without her saber and shoto hanging there. Her hands restless. Incomplete in an essential way.
When she had them in hand the path always seemed so-
"Clarity." she answered, gaze locking onto Daughter.
"Closer now, I think," she nodded gracefully, "And what clouds your path?"
She thought of the oily shadow that hung over the galaxy, "The Dark side."
"Yes, out there…" her gaze went to some place Ahsoka could not see, "Out there it seeps into everything, diseased and rotten. But here, in this place, at this time, do you feel it?"
"I… no…" here all she felt was light.
"Then the cloud is inside you."
Ahsoka paled, "Inside?" she reached inwards, searching for something, anything that would give away the darkness in her, "I don't feel anything…" she frowned, worry creeping up her spine.
Daughter laid a delicate hand on her shoulder, "The loss you feel inside, the emptiness that hollows your heart, the pain you cannot let go of."
"No!" Ahsoka knocked her hand away and stepped back, "I don't want to go to the Dark side! I've been trying to let go. I have! I want to!" her eyes darted wildly, "I need to, but the pain just shows up sometimes. I can't force it away, and when I try not to think about it I end up thinking about it. And sometimes I remember something Master Plo said or a trick Skyguy showed me and…"
"I felt them all die!" she choked, "All of them, they screamed out and then it was just silence. Some didn't even get a chance to scream." she felt tears, when was the last time she cried? "I didn't want them to die."
Arms wrapped around herself, Ahsoka collapsed to her knees. A terrible ache spread through her.
And then the Daughter crouched down and embraced her.
She was warm and comforting, her voice gentle, "This is not the Dark side. Pain, loss, emptiness… only the dark would deny these in themselves. Only the dark would want these for others."
"But I should be able to let go, push them aside."
"Is your pain such a small thing to be brushed aside? Your loss so insignificant to be forgotten?"
Indignant now, "No." Ahsoka finally looked up, shaking her head so sharply her lekku whipped around, "No!"
"Then do not attempt to do so," Daughter commanded, "Holdfast your pain, remember fondly your loss and know the emptiness you feel is heavy with the weight of love gone."
Ahsoka was still, her voice small, "Does it get easier?"
A smile gentle and sad, "Yes, but it never disappears completely. It is a burden easier to carry over time with practice. Or shared with others."
And Ahsoka nodded, eyes clear and determined, "A burden I can easily accept."
Daughter smiled, radiant and fierce, "Now you understand," she helped Ahsoka up, stepped back and swept her arm in an arc around them, "Find the path you seek, young one."
Ahsoka looked past Daughter, and the Force spread out in all directions. Shining and clear. Gone was the endless path, each one now ending with a obvious destination. One lead back to the door she came in, she could see Tala and Cu beyond, curled up on the cool stone floors of the temple entranceway. Rex was there too, tinkering with something underneath giant flowers, occasionally glancing her way.
One lead to the crystal chamber, she could see the tiny pinpricks of light glinting off of the crystals.
One lead to another doorway, shadowed and solemn. Nothing beyond. She would not return from that path.
One lead to Daughter herself, she could see the endless cycling of death and rebirth on Mortis behind her.
One lead outside, a long empty path littered with bodies and ending in an unfathomable dark.
Or she knew she could remain as she was, never leaving this place. Enshrined in a forgotten temple.
There was no choice really, Ahsoka walked past Daughter to the crystal chamber, not seeing her fade away behind her. A few steps brought the distant chamber around her, ceiling arcing high overhead. The crystals twinkled cheerfully, welcoming. Reaching out with the Force she found what she was looking for, two crystals that burned like tiny suns, outshining all the others. She picked them up, they looked so mundane against her palm, and pocketed them. She didn't have the components to construct the saber and shoto with her, she would have to wait until she got back to the ship.
Turning around she walked the only path still there, back the way she came. It only took a few steps to reach the enameled doors. They opened at her touch, spilling the soft white light of the flowers on her, so similar to the Daughter's light she was amazed she didn't remember.
She walked through, a familiar figure in front of her turning around, "Hiya, Rex."
Rex stood from where he had camped out by the spring, his face worried as he hurried over. He made it just as a wave of exhaustion overcame her, her legs folding as she fell, "Ahsoka!" he managed to grab her before she could completely collapse, hands tight around her shoulder and waist.
"Oh," she breathed out, fatigue draining her. This close to him, she noticed his beard was a bit longer, "How long was I in there?"
"53 hours," was his curt reply, "Are you alright?"
Days? It seemed maybe a few hours, "Good, better than I have in a while," at his unbelieving face she added, "Tired though. I got my crystals."
A small smile, "Didn't doubt it for a minute. C'mon, got camp set up, you alright to walk?"
"Um," she was already barely holding her head up as is.
"I'll take that as a 'no'," Rex picked her up, the hand on her waist slipping under her knees. Pressed this close she could tell he had removed his breastplate and pauldron, he had worn it nearly the entire trip here, hidden under his travel cloak. She shook her head and gave a tiny laugh, this was what she was noticing right now? She must really be exhausted. But it was nice…
And with that thought she passed out, content to let Rex carry her.
Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars.
A/N Inspired by the picture of Ahsoka and Rex riding giant wolves.
