Let Me Tell You A Story

Friendship!Penny/Amy One Shot with hints of Shamy, mentions of Lenny, and Friendship!S/P


Tapping a manicured finger to her tongue and pressing it to the corner, Penny leisurely turned a page of her glossy magazine. She uncrossed her legs and reached forward to reach for her glass of Schiava red wine, not taking her eyes off the article. She took a generous sip- Ah, perfect summer wine- and returned the glass to it's resting place. Her lips pursed forward a moment and Penny briefly wondered why she was spending her Saturday evening alone reading Cosmo articles about 'impressing one's lover'. Meh. With a hushed sigh, Penny flipped the magazine closed and tossed it on her table.

As if Cosmo would give me any worthwhile tips. She mused with a smile, thinking of her shorter than average, but more brilliant than average boyfriend who was 'fighting Krakens and challenging icebergs' in the North Sea. His words, not hers.

Her hand absentmindedly traveled to her collar area, fingers gently caressing the necklace that rested there- a shining reminder of the love she felt and the closeness to Leonard no matter how far away he was- and sat back in her couch, head tilted back.

Penny shut her eyes, almost sleepily, and mentally counted the days until his return.

One...Two...Knock knock knock- "Penny." Three...Knock knock knock- "Penny." Four...what?

Her head popped up from it's recline, her expression flat as she regarded the door to her left.

Knock knock knock- "Penny." She controlled the urge to roll her eyes and with a huff, swung herself from her warm seat and walked briskly to the door.

She pulled it open and regarded the tall man on the other side, who stood fidgeting in the hall. He threw a quick glance over his shoulder- to his own apartment, surely- and then brought his distressed blue eyes to her. Penny's expression softened as she watched him shuffle from one foot to the other, "What's wrong, sweetie?"

Sheldon swallowed heavily and wiped his palms on his thighs, "I require your assistance regarding an emergency." Penny's head immediately popped back in alarm and she stepped back into her apartment and gestured him inside with a sweep of her arm. He responded with a swift shake of his head and took a distressed breath.

"Okay, sweetie, tell me what's wrong. Are you hurt?" Sheldon shook his head and she watched him for a moment, stepping back into the hall. Vaguely remembering Amy going to the boys' apartment when Penny was returning home from work earlier this evening, the blonde redirected her question. "Is Amy hurt?"

At this, Sheldon paused a moment, but shook his head a third time. Penny blew a stray piece of hair out of her face in exasperation.

"You have to give me something here, Sheldon. We're not playing 20 Questions," She noted the pause from earlier and tried one last time. "Amy isn't hurt- at all- right?"

Sheldon physically twitched and began to ramble, "Amy is not physically impaired, no, and I highly doubt you would be of much assistance if that were the case; You have no knowledge of medicinal remedies and you certainly wouldn't be able to correctly treat any sort of injury. Unless, of course, she were to require speedy transportation to the hospital and you carried her down the stairs like a sack of potatoes with your inhuman man-arms-" Penny's mouth thinned into a line and her eyebrows rose.

"-with your higher than average physical prowess."

A tilt of her head signaled the unintended insult was forgiven and that he could continue, "Amy is, however, distressed. And weepy. I don't like weepy."

"Sweetie," Penny's head lulled down a moment. "Amy is upset and you want me, her friend, to make her feel better instead of you, her boyfriend?" She couldn't believe her ears. What the hell, Sheldon?

"Yes," came the immediate reply. Oh, for cryin' out loud!

"You do realize how ridiculous I think you sound right now?"

"And you realize that you are dragging this current social encounter out unnecessarily when you could be helping me make Amy feel better?" Sheldon countered heatedly. He at least sounded concerned, but she wasn't going to dig him out of his predicament freely. Not. A. Chance.

"Then you had better tell me something better than 'I don't like weepy.' Sheldon. Did you even try to do anything for her?" Penny raised a finger before he could respond, "And the answer better be something better than 'I came here.' or I will slam this door in your face right now."

As much as Penny was concerned and wanted to go to her best friend's side, she also thought that Sheldon needed to step up and do something for the brunette. No way in hell he's gonna crawl away from comforting her. I'll kick his ass if he dares think otherwise. Her threat and current look seemed to have pushed Sheldon back into panic and ramble mode.

"I did try! I did! I-I-I offered her a hot beverage; she refused it, even after I made it. Which- I might add- is a waste of good tea. I offered to watch a marathon of Downtown Abbey so long as it was on a volume low enough that I could tune it out while doing some work on my laptop!" Sheldon jumped back instinctively when Penny stomped her foot on the ground in front of him.

"Sheldon!"

He turned sideways and rose his hands in defense, eying her feet for a moment, "Wait, wait! I even offered...offered light physical contact in the form of c-cuddling."

"And?" She offered no mercy, her arms crossed and expression serious like a lion ready to pounce it's prey.

"She looked at me-"

"I swear if you are about to say that she was going to jump you, I'm going to-"

"-she said no."

...What?

Penny's jaw dropped, "What? W-what do you mean she said no? She never says no. As a matter of fact, that is because you never offer to cuddle! Ever."

Sheldon bobbed his head forward, eyes practically bulging from their sockets.

Holy crap on a cracker, he's serious.

Penny's hands closed into fists and opened again a couple times while she thought, and then reached behind her to shut the door. "Alright, let's go." Sheldon seemed to release a huge breath, watched as she passed him and entered his apartment. He followed seconds later and saw Penny approach Amy, who was sitting on the middle cushion of his and Leonard's faux leather couch. Her vacant stare into the kitchen unnerved her blonde bestie, who had taken a seat to her right.

"Heyyyyy, sweetie." Penny gently nudged Amy's shoulder with her own, while passing a quick look over to Sheldon. He had just shut the door and was now standing awkwardly near it, fidgeting again as if he thought walking into Amy's line of sight would trigger some sort of bad nuclear reaction. Penny disregarded the lanky man and turned her attention to the upset woman who had not yet responded.

"Amy?" she called again, instead opting to tap her on the leg to lure her attention away from whatever it was Amy stared at. Which, Penny assumed, was absolutely nothing. Her worry escalated, but like with Sheldon, she tried one more time. Come on, sweetie, answer me.

"Amy, what's bothering you? Did something happen?" As if snapped out of a stupor, Amy's body shook like she were shaking out a shiver. Then, her head turned towards Penny and green eyes sadly regarded her.

"Penny," Amy's voice was hoarse; she cleared her throat. Penny noticed the twin sleek trails of dried tears that meandered down her cheeks before Amy's face turned down to her feet. "Am I ugly?"

Immediately, Penny did a double take back to Sheldon, who was now biting his lip nervously. She gave him a quick look of sympathy and sent a silent apology his way, while she also rubbed a hand on Amy's arm. The reason behind his panic now became startlingly apparent. He can hardly deal with people as it is. She frowned. I can't blame him entirely for not know what to do in this situation.

She mentally cracked her knuckles, having dealt with her fair share of friends in 'moods', she planned her series of actions accordingly.

"No, sweetie, no." She raised her hand to Amy's face and pulled it's line of vision to her stern gaze. "Why would you ever think that?" When Amy started to sniffle, she plucked a tissue from the Rubik's cube box that was conveniently in front of them and offered it to her.

"Thank you-" Amy blew her nose harshly, causing the other two occupants to cringe lightly. "I went to my sister's bachelorette party last night."

"Oh, the one who was dating that one car salesman?" Penny momentarily was swept away into her best friend's gossip, scooting a bit closer and waiting for clarification. Amy nodded slowly, leaving the crumpled tissue in her lap and clamped her hands together.

"Correct, the younger, prettier, D-cup bust goddess whom everyone worships and adores," Amy's list of attributes of her younger sibling just as quickly pulled Penny out of her gossip-mode and back into best-friend-mode.

"Okay, okay. So what happened?" She gently prodded Amy for an explanation, though she had an idea where this was about to go. She listened intently, noting out of the corner of her eye as Sheldon walked by into the kitchen and began tinkering around with as little noise as possible.

"Well," Amy's head tilted slightly. "I went to the party, against my better judgment; my mother said that it is social protocol to at least show up to that if I wasn't to make the wedding, since she is my sister. Might I add that I absolutely abhor these kinds of social gatherings, as the few I've attended in the past resulted in high amounts of liquor with mostly people I don't know and with that, lots of demeaning comments about 'the ugly girl in the room' and self esteem destroying questions regarding choice of clothing and whether one has ever been laid."

While not the exact wording she would have chose, Penny was very in-the-know about how parties with a majority of it's participants being women went. Comparing outfits and scoffing at other women prettier or more successful than you was a common event. But this was her sister's event, why had the younger woman let such a thing happen? To quote Sheldon, shrewd.

She could only help but wonder what kind of person Amy's sister was if she chose to be friends with peers that put her older sister under such ridicule for much of their years growing up together, and even into their adult life.

Penny never met the younger sibling, but she already knew she didn't like her. Not a damn bit.

"So, after my sister had explained about how she was going to be modeling in a couple issues of Cosmo-" Note to self, stop buying Cosmo- scratch that. Buy Cosmo with said sister and draw ink mustaches on all pictures. Penny nodded slightly to herself as she listened. "-she asked me how my work as a 'brain-whatever' was going. Naturally, I explained my past work with addiction studies in small mammals and some of the neurobiological network research I've been currently swamped in as of late."

Penny smiled gently at Amy as she noticed the lighter tone her friend had temporarily taken when she talked about her job. She knew Amy took great pride in her work, and felt that she deserved to hold every damn ounce of that pride.

"And of course, Kat asked about my having a boyfriend, which I had confirmed. I even explained that I had it in an official documentation," Amy's green eyes began to well up with tears as she continued. "Kat's friends apparently found that funny and started barraging me with questions about Sheldon. I-I answered what I could, but they seemed unconvinced. Kat then thought it necessary to mention that on more than one occasion, I have boasted to having a male companion and that I would bring him to a family event, but failed to in the end."

"Amy..."

"They thought Sheldon was another fabricated fantasy I had created for myself because there was 'No way in Hell' I would have a real boyfriend. Thenthe conversation shifted to what could be the cause of being single and sexless for thirty-something odd years." Tears were plopping down Amy's already stained cheeks.

Penny gritted her teeth, suddenly wishing she had the power of Thor so she could wield his hammer and pound the little bitches so far into the ground, dust wouldn't even be left. She looked up to find Sheldon standing at the counter, hands flat upon the surface, and regarding the two women with a disapproving frown. Penny surmised that he felt much like she did, and while Amy was busy wiping her overflowing tears and looking down at her feet, she quietly pounded her fist into her hand at Sheldon. His eyebrows narrowed slightly and with a puckered frown, he nodded to her before returning to his task at hand of cleaning the mugs.

Penny then switched her focus back to her emotional friend, who had calmed herself enough and was looking at Penny with curiosity.

"Go ahead, sweetie; I'm listening." Penny urged with a pat on Amy's shoulder. The brunette nodded and continued.

"Long story short- I'm an aesthetically unpleasant, plain woman, whom dresses in frumpy old-woman clothing, and probably won't ever have a real boyfriend so long as the 'sun travels around the earth'," Amy frowned deeply as she harshly wiped her eye. "Which, might I add, is scientifically incorrect. Anyone should know that the earth orbits around the sun, not the.. other.. way around."

Penny watched Amy bite her lip in silence, holding back another onslaught of watershed.

Penny was mad, Penny was angry.

Nuts to that, Penny was pissed.

This whole scenario only darkly reminded her of a certain other scientist and her treatment of her son, who just so happened to be her boyfriend. Where the hell did these families learn how to...to...be a damn family?! She thought, her nose scrunched up and brow furrowed.

"-and your sister?" she dared to ask, though already guessing the answer, seeing the way Amy was now.

"Did nothing. Laughed, even. Apparently, I'm a riot at parties."

"Where was your mother?"

"She didn't attend, she had not been able to make it due to some issues with Grandmother."

"Hm." Right, of course she wouldn't be there.

Amy was quiet for a few moments, and then turned to Penny with a little more earnest than Penny thought was comfortable. Uh oh.

"What if you made me over for my next family event, Bestie?"

Penny blinked twice, "I'm sorry, do what for what-what?"

"Give me a total makeover! Penny, you know!" The blonde half of the bestie duo felt the impending rant coming on, leaned slightly away from Amy, and braced for the impact. Amy grabbed her arm and leveled her with an excited stare. Was Amy this bipolar before? Is it her time of the month? Is it my time of the month? ….no, then no for her. Ugh, why am I thinking about our matching cycles? Focus, Penny!

"You'd be perfect for the job! We could manicure me, and I could get my eyebrows done. And I could get my legs waxed- we could go dress shopping! Stop at Victoria's Secret and buy one of those 'two sizes bigger' padded bras! You could do my hair, in wild curls! And of course, the look wouldn't be complete without doing my face up in whorish,but stylish makeup!" As Amy's rant zig-zagged all over the board, Penny heard a loud clink from the kitchen as Sheldon dropped a mug on the counter and whipped his head over to his crazy-sounding girlfriend, eyes wide. She shook her head at him before he even attempted to open his mouth and then looked slowly back to the expectant woman.

Penny let out a little sigh and grabbed Amy's hand, "Sure, sweetie, sure." She raised her free hand up just as Sheldon harshly whispered- "Penny!"- and shot a glare at her. She ignored him and kept her eyes locked with Amy's and added, "I'll give you a sprucing, but we aren't going to do any of that stuff you just mentioned." No way in hell, sister.

Amy's smile dropped and she let out a nervous stutter, "W-why not?" Penny smiled and rubbed the hand enclosed in her own.

"Because, Amy, I can't do that."

"I-I don't understand. Even if you are as gorgeous as a porcelain doll, your expertise in furthering the aesthetic appeal of a woman could-"

"Sweetie, it's not that I'm physically incapable of doing it; That's not what I meant."

"...then what do you mean? Because even a make over wouldn't make me pretty?"

Penny thought for a moment, then concluded.

"Because... it's not you."

Amy gave her a look that Penny assumed was the same look she gave whenever one of the others started to explain complicated subjects regarding their careers. A deer in the headlights? No, no, more like an adorable, confused puppy.

"Being me hasn't worked for me thus far, now has it?" Amy muttered with a slight twinge of venom.

Clicking her tongue once, then a second time, Penny leveled her best friend with a stern stare and clamped her hand tightly on Amy.

"Now, you listen to me. Having me do you over in full make-up, slutty dresses and push up boobs isn't going to make you a better woman, and it's definitely not going to prove anything worthwhile to those girls, or your sister, or anyone who has wronged you in the past. That is not who you are, that will never be who you are, and it should never be what you strive for.

Things like that, Amy, they make you pretty, sure. But it's also the same as someone wearing a mask and claiming it their face, you're fabricating a lie to show people what you think they want to see. "

Penny searched Amy's expression for a hint of understanding, but all she saw was sadness. She thought quickly, heart throbbing as the desire to quell her friend's hurt rose rapidly.

"You are an actress putting on a tragedy for people who want to see a comedy, Amy. They don't say those things because they want to see you prettier, or sexier, or whatever. There are a lot of people who are mean and no matter what you do, they will continue to be such so long as they find entertainment in it. You shouldn't aim to impress them. They don't deserve you're efforts."

Her impassioned feelings bubbled to the surface as she spoke. Penny desperately wanted to reach this precious person in front of her, and offer her comfort. This feeling- along with the want to pummel all the people who made Amy this insecure about herself- fueled her words. She knew exactly what to do.

"You know what I see when I look at you, Amy? When I speak to you- and watch you?" Amy responded with a meek shake of her head, as if she were enchanted by the blonde and couldn't move any more than that. Penny gave her the warmest smile Amy thought she had ever seen; her chest fluttered warmly. "Then, let me tell you a story."

"When I first met you, I saw a fairy tale within you: A story of an innocent girl that was raised to use her knowledge as a shield for her feelings, and a sword against intruders that threatened them. But, she didn't always know how to effectively use them. As a result, she probably got hurt many times, her weapons broke, and she tried to reinforce her hurt heart with a stronger shield, a stronger sword. But that girl couldn't fix what was once broken, so she settled for a shield that lessened the hurtful blows instead of deflecting them, and created a new sword that sliced even those who carried good intentions. Insecurity and the pain of not being accepted buried the girl within a deep, deep hole. A hole she could no longer crawl out of. So then, the reliance on that shield, that sword, became the mask; the her wasn't truly her, but allowed her safety."

She watched as Amy's eyes widened in awe and tears lightly dribbled down her cheeks once again. Penny swiftly wiped them away with her fingers, without a pause, her smile never faltering.

"This girl, covered in hurt, defended by an impenetrable shield, and hidden in an emotionless mask then, by a stroke of fate- and the meddling of two little men- met a man who was similar to her in so many ways, it startled her. And while finding solace in another human being so much like her comforted her, she was inevitably drawn into his world and with it: the people alongside him. She wasn't easy to get along with; her sword cut many times, and unintentionally hurt many people. But slowly, slowly, as she encountered him, encountered them, her shield began to lower and her sword started to reshape. And soon enough-"

Penny swept her arms out wide, motioning her hands around like she were casting a magic spell before gesturing back to Amy's person, palms up in revelation. "-we were able to see the real, unmasked Amy Farrah Fowler." She softly tucked a lock of hair behind Amy's ear before finishing her tale.

"This Amy is a brilliant, smart, and charming woman who still uses her shield to defend her feelings, but now uses her sword to defend her friends. She may dress like she's from the old generation-" Penny playfully winked."-but she dresses to her own comfort, is always unique and full of color. She radiates of exuberance and life and sometimes the rest of us can't keep up! Her green eyes, which may I say, are flippin' gorgeous, shine with the adoration of countless loving words and she speaks countless more.

She's still insecure, but that's only because she hasn't finished discovering all there is to know about love and friendships and the life ahead of her. And that's okay, everyone is like that sometime in their lives. But she has that love, those friendships, that life to guide her through it all, and hopefully through that, she'll see that there isn't a need for masks. That there is so much beauty already in her and about her and there are people that see this beauty. Friends who care for her, and a boyfriend who loves her, and there is no need for those big changes that attempt to impress the people that don't matter."

Penny raised a hand and curled it into a fist, "And if them damn bitches won't see the greatness that is you, as you are, then we can deal with them- Nebraskan style," she popped said fist forward, lightly rapping her knuckles over Amy's heart. The neurobiologist's mouth curled into a large smile, her hand welcoming as Penny dipped the tightfisted hand down to it, curving her fingers around Amy's and clasping it tight. The blonde noted that Sheldon had, for the last couple minutes, been watching them.

A silence hung in the air for several moments, until a sharp whistling noise coming from the kitchen snapped all three people out of their reverie. With a quick snap of the burner dial, Sheldon pulled the tea kettle off the burner and set it aside, casting a nervous look over his shoulder at the girls. Penny let out a laugh and slapped her knee with glee as Amy looked into her boyfriend's eyes with mirth. He returned the gentle look with one of his own, relieved that she was in better spirits, and turned back to start prepping new tea.

As soon as his gaze broke contact with her's, Amy looked over at her bestie with the same happy expression, "That was...a wonderful story, Penny."

"Well hell, you're makin' me blush, Amy! I hope you understand the moral of the story." Penny gave her a fake glare. "Don't make me give you homework!" Really, please don't. A lighthearted laugh bubbled from Amy's throat as she sat back in her seat and crossed her ankles, contemplating for a few moments.

"I...I understand perfectly, Penny," Amy's face turned serious for a breath. "Thank you, so much."

"You're very welcome, sweetie."

Amy smiled shyly as she looked over to Sheldon, who had moments earlier quietly approached the two women with an equal number of mugs that carried a warm aroma. The couple's eyes locked, and this time Amy accepted the yellow mug from his right hand. "I've never had a story told about me before."

"Yes, well, let us hope that next time the ending is a little less crass," Sheldon offered the remaining red mug to Penny, and gave her a perturbed look. The blonde simply blew a raspberry as she accepted the drink and took a careful sip. Throat. Parched!

After retrieving his own blue mug of tea, Sheldon walked to the couch and sat in his spot. The three apartment occupants were quiet again for a couple minutes, watching the steam rise from their hot teas. The silence was broken this time by Penny, who had set her mug down with a small clink and stretched her arms up over her head.

"I think, after this lovely story, there is only one thing to do to complete this bonding time!" she chirped, plopping her hands into her lap and turning to face the pair to her left. They both looked to her with confusion, Sheldon accompanied the look with a tilt of his head.

"What's that, bestie?" came Amy's inquiry, her green eyes blinking as she then too placed her drink on the table. Penny's smile turned cat-like as she raised her hands into paws, pounced on the unsuspecting girl, which also knocked her over into the also unsuspecting boyfriend, who had to raise his mug high above his head to avoid spillage. The 'prey' let out a yelp, followed by a laugh as Penny wrapped her arms around Amy's shoulders and held her tightly.

"Cuddling tiiiiiiime!" The sing-song reply and a blonde head nuzzling into Amy inspired more girlish giggles between the two women, too much for Sheldon's taste. With an annoyed grunt, he set his mug down next to him on the end table and then looked down to his peacefully content girlfriend now pushed snug against his side. As if sensing his eyes on her, Amy lifted her head to him, questioning his level of comfort with their sudden contact.

Sheldon's blue eyes watched her a moment, contemplatively, before he reached down between them and gently covered the top of her hand with his. Her gaze looked down at their joined hands, followed them as Sheldon pulled said hands onto his thigh, and turned her hand over to lace his fingers through hers. Once again, but by a different person, her heart fluttered. She returned her sights to his face, offered him a loving smile, and then leaned her head down on his shoulder.

Together, they-the best friend and the boyfriend- huddled next to their shared most important woman, and the three relaxed in blissful silence and warmth for the rest of the sunny afternoon.

Author's Note: Alrighty, so this turned from a small idea intended to be a drabble to a full blown story with a sequel that may or may not happen. For the most part, I wanted this in Penny's POV, as it is her thoughts only that are ever highlighted, but there were certain non POV descriptions I felt needed to be there, so if became jumbly, my apologies. This is the first time I'm breathing fictional life into fictional characters in 7 years, I am probably rusty as all heck. Haha.

I'll probably go on the hunt for a beta for the next installment.

Anyway, I appreciate any and all for reading. Reviews are always appreciated and welcome, but even you reading this makes my heart flutter. :) Until next time!