Standard Disclaimer. I own absolutely diddly, but I'd really, *really*,
*REALLY* like to own Trip. Mmmmm. Accent. Mmmmmm… Ok, I'm back!
The Donuts Are Coming!! The Donuts Are Coming!!
Another pleasant, boring day on the Enterprise. Reed whistled happily. No evil bug-eyed monsters to fight, no phase cannons to align, no T'Pol complaining about EVERY LITTLE THING…
"Sir, I'm picking up a comm signal."
Malcolm sighed. He knew it was too good to last.
"It's an invasion call. They say we have to surrender and err… resistance is futile?"
"Don't be stupid!" came a voice through the comm link. "*That* would be the Borg. You haven't met the Borg yet. That would be as stupid as Q turning up on the Bridge…"
"Hey y'all," said Q.
"Get out of there!" screamed the voice. "This is *my* invasion, and you're not gonna take it over! You've done that the last twenty three times!!"
"Alright, alright. Party pooper." He clicked his fingers, and sighed. "Is it too much to ask for a squeaky hydrogen pop?"
The special effects guy grabbed his crucible and, true to form, a squeaky hydrogen pop was heard.
"That's better!" said Q, as he disappeared, slowly, leaving his smile hanging in the air.
"This isn't Alice in Wonderland, Q. Get out of there! You said it could be *my* turn today, darling."
The mouth sighed. "Snookums, I thought we said we wouldn't use nicknames in the workplace… Al*right*. Have your silly invasion. When you need me, I'll be in my dressing room…"
"Finally! Ahem. As I was saying, before Fluffy Bunny turned up… I'm taking over this ship. You all have to obey me. I'm transporting my men over… NOW!"
50, 000 donuts materialised on the Bridge. Everyone began laughing.
"WHAT'S SO FUNNY!!"
"You're… you're… DONUTS!"
"Your point being…?"
In answer, Archer began to roll on the floor, choking with laughter.
"Get 'em, boys," said the voice.
As one, the donuts leaped in the air and began hitting themselves against the crewmembers. Archer struggled over to the communicator panel thingy and said "Enterprise Crew, this is the Captain. Eat as many donuts as you can. This is an order."
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
In minutes, the invasion was over.
"I never would have known Vulcans could hold so much…" mused Archer.
"Oh, it's the three stomachs, Captain," informed Dr. Phlox.
Meanwhile, back aboard the donut ship.
"They wouldn't listen, cupcake…"
"I know, sugar. Why don't you come over here, and I'll make it all better…"
Without further ado, Q and the DonutQueen began to make that night *very* interesting…
THE END
The Donuts Are Coming!! The Donuts Are Coming!!
Another pleasant, boring day on the Enterprise. Reed whistled happily. No evil bug-eyed monsters to fight, no phase cannons to align, no T'Pol complaining about EVERY LITTLE THING…
"Sir, I'm picking up a comm signal."
Malcolm sighed. He knew it was too good to last.
"It's an invasion call. They say we have to surrender and err… resistance is futile?"
"Don't be stupid!" came a voice through the comm link. "*That* would be the Borg. You haven't met the Borg yet. That would be as stupid as Q turning up on the Bridge…"
"Hey y'all," said Q.
"Get out of there!" screamed the voice. "This is *my* invasion, and you're not gonna take it over! You've done that the last twenty three times!!"
"Alright, alright. Party pooper." He clicked his fingers, and sighed. "Is it too much to ask for a squeaky hydrogen pop?"
The special effects guy grabbed his crucible and, true to form, a squeaky hydrogen pop was heard.
"That's better!" said Q, as he disappeared, slowly, leaving his smile hanging in the air.
"This isn't Alice in Wonderland, Q. Get out of there! You said it could be *my* turn today, darling."
The mouth sighed. "Snookums, I thought we said we wouldn't use nicknames in the workplace… Al*right*. Have your silly invasion. When you need me, I'll be in my dressing room…"
"Finally! Ahem. As I was saying, before Fluffy Bunny turned up… I'm taking over this ship. You all have to obey me. I'm transporting my men over… NOW!"
50, 000 donuts materialised on the Bridge. Everyone began laughing.
"WHAT'S SO FUNNY!!"
"You're… you're… DONUTS!"
"Your point being…?"
In answer, Archer began to roll on the floor, choking with laughter.
"Get 'em, boys," said the voice.
As one, the donuts leaped in the air and began hitting themselves against the crewmembers. Archer struggled over to the communicator panel thingy and said "Enterprise Crew, this is the Captain. Eat as many donuts as you can. This is an order."
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
In minutes, the invasion was over.
"I never would have known Vulcans could hold so much…" mused Archer.
"Oh, it's the three stomachs, Captain," informed Dr. Phlox.
Meanwhile, back aboard the donut ship.
"They wouldn't listen, cupcake…"
"I know, sugar. Why don't you come over here, and I'll make it all better…"
Without further ado, Q and the DonutQueen began to make that night *very* interesting…
THE END
