Disclaimer: Only the writing style of The Guy Next Door by Meg Cabot. The rest is J.K Rowlings'. Nuff said.
Summary: Read the funny emails Harry Potter and his friends are sending each other! It revolves around the summer at first but when they return for their third-year in the school, chaos ensues as the wizards and witches discovers about the Internet.
Author's Note: Don't bother asking about the emails. Something's wrong with it.
Harry's: theboywholived. Hermione: smartgryffindor. Ginny: iloveharrypotter. Ron: ChuddlyCanons. Fred and George: prankster221 and prankster911.
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To: Hermione Granger
From: Harry Potter
Subject: YES!
Hey, Hermione. Guess what? I am living in the burrow now. Big-D finally convinced Aunt Petunia and Aunt Vernon (with his new look, I think he could pass of as a woman) to just dump me with the "freaks"! I can't wait to start third-year, since Ron's Mum already signed my permission slip to visit Hogsmeade. When I left the house, Big-D dumped his laptop with me so I decided to create an email address. Ron is fascinated by it - you should see his face right now.
The Weasleys celebrated my birthday. It was nice, you should have came.
Oh I have to go, Ron just plugged out the charger.
P.S: His dad helped with the plugging in thing.
Harry.
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To: Harry Potter
From: Hermione Granger
Subject: Congrats.
You must be so happy. Yeah, I too have a laptop. My birthday present from dad; mum got me a cat from Diagon Alley. It looks as if a pan has been smashed onto his face.
I wanted to name him Gingerale (because he is ginger in colour) but then the name Crookshanks came up! Because whenever I say, "Gingerale", mom would get me a ginger ale to drink. And don't ask what kind of name Crookshanks is... I'm not so sure myself.
I can't wait until third-year starts. Word is, we're going to have a new Professor for DADA. I swear, Dumbledore changes his professors as frequent as Jennifer Aniston changes her hair-styles. I heard that she straightened her hair, again. Anyway, I can't come over to the burrow, mum won't allow it. I have to go to my stupid dentist appointments. My teeth are straight and nice now, but it's too big… like a beaver. Maybe what Malfoy said was right. Should I go visit Madam Pomfrey to shrink my teeth?
P.S: Doesn't your email sounds a bit too cocky? The Boy who lived? Honestly Harry.
P.P.S: AND DID YOU READ THE DAILY PROPHET?
P.P.P.S: How in the world did you get Internet connection?
Love From
Hermione.
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To: Hermione Granger
From: Harry Potter
Subject: Yes Hermione, I did.
Dudley already has his own line so it's easy for me to connect and disconnect. I saw how Dudley did it so I'm going to do the same for the rest of the Weasleys if they get their own laptops.
Yes, I did read the daily prophet. Who is Sirius Black anyway? Ron's dad told me he's some deranged murderer who escaped from Azkaban to kill me. First I thought it was an April fool's joke but then I remembered it was July. LOL.
Ron then explained to me what Sirius Black did, and it sort of gave me cold feet. But anyway, I can't wait to start my third-year and no fugitive shall ruin it. Now Ron wants a new email - so does Fred, George and Ginny. Sabbers was acting really weird today, he wouldn't eat at all. Very weird.
And I happen to like my email address. Hey, will Dumbledore allow me to bring my laptop? Won't it be cool if we all start sending emails to each other? I hope they have computers installed in school.
P.S: It's alright Mione, you needn't shrink it. Cause it wouldn't be the Hermione we know and love. :)
Harry.
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To: Harry Potter
From: Hermione Granger
Subject: Thanks.
Thanks Harry. And NO OF COURSE THEY DON'T INSTALL COMPUTERS THERE. They send letters by owl; people like us send emails by the Internet. Anyhoo, I think they would. But they wouldn't find out anyway, you're only going to bring it to the library and the common room. On second thought, maybe we should write a letter first. Great, mum's calling. Tell me what you think about that?
Love from
Hermione.
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To: HERMIONE GRANGER
From: RON WEASLEY
Subject: JEOF3EFOF
HI HERMIONE! HARRY TAUGHT ME HOW TO USE HIS BAPTOP. IT'S REALLY CONFUSING AND COOL. IT TOOK ME HOURS TO TYPE ON THIS KEYBOARD. FUNNY, I WONDER WHY THEY CALL IT A KEYBOARD. FIRST OF ALL, IT DOESN'T LOOK LIKE A KEY AND IT'S NOT A BOARD EITHER. MUM THOUGHT IT WAS SOME SORT OF DISEASE AND HARRY HAD TO EXPLAIN IT. HARRY'S TEACHING GINNY NOW, FRED AND GEORGE DECIDED TO GET THEIR OWN BAPTOPS NOW. MUM DECIDED AGAINST IT BUT SINCE DAD HAS HIS FASCINATION WITH MUGGLE INVENTIONS, HE WENT TO LONDON WITH FRED. IT COSTS A DUNGBOMB I TELL YOU, AND THEY REFUSED TO TAKE DAD'S GALLEONS (HE WON THE ANNUAL DAILY PROPHET GGRAND PRIZE GALLEON DRAW.) THEY WANTED POUNDS. HONESTLY, POUNDS.
GALLEONS ARE SO MUCH BETTER. DAD WAS PICKING A FIGHT WITH ONE OF THE SHOPKEEPERS UNTIL FRED SAID THAT THEY WERE NON-MAGICAL FOLK AND THEY DON'T KNOW WHAT IS A GALLEON.
SOME MUGGLES CAN BE SO STUPID. NOT YOU, HERMIONE.
HOW THE HELL CAN WE GET POUNDS? ANYWAY, HARRY SAID THAT HE ALREADY SENT THE LETTER TO HOGWARTS. I THINK DUMBLEDORE WILL ALLOW IT. I WONDER, WHAT DO YOU PUT IN THE "SUBJECT" CORNER? I AM CONFUSED SO I JUST PUT SOME LETTERS THERE, JUST TO FILL IT UP. IT'S FUN.
OH LOOK! DAD ALREADY BOUGHT BAPTOPS FOR FRED AND GEORGE. I'M GOING TO SHARE THIS BAPTOP WITH HARRY, FRED AND GEORGE WILL ALSO BE SHARING ONE AND GINNY – THAT'S NOT FAIR! SHE GETS HER OWN.
BUGGER.
HEY, WHAT'S LOL?
THIS IS BLIMEY WICKEDLY COOOL!!!
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To: George Weasley
From: Fred Weasley
Subject:
Hilarious, we're sitting right next to each other while doing "this". I never knew muggles could have such cool stuff. Maybe we should recruit Harry to our group?
Your funny twin,
Fred.
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To: Fred Weasley
From: George Weasley
Subject:
I think we should. Ron never did this for us, in fact, Ron never did stuff that were interesting. Imagine the look on his face when we recruit Harry, he'll be saying:
Recruit him? First you recruit Ginny, now him? I am your own brother for Merlin's Sake!
Now stop it, you're going to break the baptop if you keep on switching off that switch.
Your funny twin who is even funnier than Fred,
George.
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To: George Weasley
From: Fred Weasley
Subject:
I bet you ten knuts that he's going to say:
Bloody hell, I am your own blood! Don't tell me you're going to recruit Hermione in too.
Your hilarious twin,
Fred.
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To: Fred Weasley
From: George Weasley
Subject:
You're on, brother. You're on.
Your lovely, hilarious, handsome twin,
George.
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To: Hermione Granger
From: Ginny Weasley
Subject: Hello.
Hi Hermione! It seems as though I am the only one who knows what to put on the "subject part". Fred and George have just recruited Harry to their 'group' and Ron is mad at them. His ears turned scarlet red, you know Ron. Don't ask about my email, Fred put that as a joke. It turned out I cannot change it, so I tested my bat-bogey hex on him.
And it worked! George is rolling on the floor, laughing his lame arse off while Fred was trying to find a counter-curse for it. Mum was shouting at them for not studying for OWLs since they are sitting for it this year.
Did I tell you, I got my won thinga-ma-jig. It's so cool! I can't wait to show all my friends, they'll be extremely jealous.
Ginny.
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To: George Weasley
From: Fred Weasley
Subject:
You owe me ten knuts, buddy. I'll be waiting right next to you.
And did you see the picture of this hot woman? I swear, Internet is getting better by the minute!
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To: Hermione Granger
From: Harry Potter
Subject: Dumbledore said yes.
Dumbledore said yes! He allowed us to bring our laptops. I hope they have Internet connection over there. I think they do, since ours is Wireless. I found out how to get the Wireless Network. Do you have Wireless network, Hermione?
Anyway, Fred and George have just recruited me into their group and Ron is furious about it. He refused to email anyone until he calmed down.
We all miss you, Hermione. One month till Hogwarts start! I hope Ron doesn't boast about it though, you know Ron.
TTFN!
Harry.
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To: Harry Potter
From: Hermione Granger
Subject: I miss you too.
I miss you too, Harry! Oh yeah, happy belated birthday. :) Tell Ron to calm down, tell Ginny that it was cool of her to cast a hex on Fred because it was really mean of him to do that to her. Tell Mr. and Mrs. Weasley that I said hi!
Love From
Hermione.
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Author's Note:
I hope you like this story. It's my first time doing it, so please review! If you have any questions, do ask!
MizMaria.
