Yet Another Cliche!
by: Brat Girl (ain't it great?)
Brat Girl pushes the Submit Review button and then closes the browser window.
"That was fun, "she says aloud, "Gosh, I luv those cliche stories. I should write another one."
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" a voice from deep inside the computer screams.
"Wha?" Brat Girl manages to say before she suddenly disappears. Brat Girl's dog Max sniffs the chair where she was and whines. He hears a noise coming from the computer and gets on the desk to investigate. The voices seem to come from somewhere inside the computer or possibly on the Internet.
"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH" Brat Girl screams as she falls for what seems like a very long time.
"THUMP!" she lands and looks around. She sees nothing.
"wha? who? where am I?" she wonders aloud.
"Welcome to Hell!.....no that's not right...let me see..."
"Who said that?"
"It is I....I mean we....no.....Us!"
"And you are?" Brat Girl gives the nothingness a look of sarcasm.
"Duh!" the voice says again. Then there's a flash of light and six figures appear.
"Uh oh..." but before Brat Girl can say another word a terrible whining is heard.
"Won't that dog shut up!" one of the figures yells. She/He/It snaps it's fingers and BG's dog appears.
"Max, I don't think we're in Kansas....er....California, anymore." Brat Girl says, holding the dog to her chest.
"God! You fanfic writers sure are stupid!" another one of the figures says.
"Fanfic writers?"Brat Girl says with a look of terror appearing on her face. "You're the Animorphs aren't you?"
"In the flesh." Marco says stepping forward, "and may I mention, nice night gown, BG."
"Brat Girl looks down at herself.
"It is ten o'clock at night, ya know." she says, standing up. "would you mine if I went back and changed?"
"Yes, I like you this way." Jake says winking at her. Cassie walks over and slaps him in the back of the head. "I was just kidding, shesh."
Brat Girl stares at him with a look of disgust for a sec and then turns to the rest of the Animorphs.
"Well?"
They look at one another and shrug.
Five seconds later, Brat Girl lands on her bed. From down the hall, inside the computer..."Yap!"...."You forgot the dog!"
A second later, a very shaken Max lands in Brat Girl's lap.
"Poor Maxwell," she cooes. "Go lay down." Brat Girl then heads to her dresser and pulls out an old pair of jeans and her tie-dye tee-shirt. She gets dressed, slips on a pair of sandals, and then goes to the computer.
"I'm ready....for....uh....whatever, " she calls quietly. She doesn't want to wake up her mom. Ten point two (the animorphs don't exactly have the transporting thing down pat) seconds later, Brat Girl appears again with the Animorphs.
"Don't you think that shirt's a little bright?" Rachel asks.
"No. I like it. "Brat Girl replies smugly. "and why aren't my words in bold? Don't I still have Omnipotent Fanfic Powers?"
< Don't ya remember? > Tobias asks, < Your binder, which was a magic 8-ball, was turned into fishflakes. >
"Butttt...."
< No buts! > Ax opens a book. He begins to read. < Once a Fanfic writer's powers are turned into fishflakes, there is nothing he/she/it can do. So there. >
"Buttt..."
"Didn't ya listen to the Ax-man?! "Marco screams. "NO BUTS!!!! "
"Oh fishsticks..."
"Don't ya mean Fishflakes?" Cassie asks.
"No." Brat Girl says sitting down with a look of defeat. "So what do you guys want me for?" Jake smiles evilly.
"We were bored. So we decided to bug a few people."
Brat Girl looks around. " A few people? I seem to be the only one here."
"Yea, well....er.....You tell her Marco. " Jake says pushing Marco in front of him.
"Well, since you haven't written a cliche in a while, and since the other one sucked...."
Brat Girl jumps up and goes for Marco's throat.
"Aaack!" he screams before his voice is cut off due to BG's hands tightening around his throat.
"Take that BACK!" she screams. Ax and Tobias, who morphed human, quickly pull Brat Girl off Marco.
Marco rubs his throat and continues, "As I was saying, before I was so rudely interrupted, is that, since you haven't had a cliche in a while, "cough" we decided to make one for you. "
"You can't do that, " Brat Girl says.
Ax opens the book again, "Yes we can. According to this......"
"What is the book anyway?" Brat Girl interrupts him.
"It's nothing." Ax says, quickly hiding the book behind his back.
"Surrrrrrrrree, it isn't. " Brat Girl says and then quickly grabs the book.
"Hey!" Ax yells and grabs on to a side of it. For the next few minutes the rest of the Animorphs watch intently as Brat Girl and Ax fight over the book, totally oblivious that a voice was calling to them.
HEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PAY ATTENTION TO ME!!!!!!
"Huh?" Brat Girl says, letting go of the book and causing Ax to go flying back into Marco.
THANK YOU. NOW THAT I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION, I CAN GET DOWN TO THE BUSINESS AT HAND.
"Are you some Fanfic writer or something?" Marco asks.
HOW DARE YOU THINK SUCH A THING! I'M THE ELLIMIST! YOU IDIOT!
"You are? You seem different."
WELL.........I GOT MY HAIR DONE. DO YOU LIKE IT?
"Yes, of course. " all the animorphs say at once. Brat Girl just looks up, supposedly out of the computer screen. "Was that ever a stupid line."
SHADDUP! ANYWAY, I AM HERE TO GET RID OF BRAT GIRL, ONCE AND FOR ALL!
"Huh? What did I do?" Brat Girl sweaks.
YOU'VE WRITTEN BAD FICS, OF COURSE.
"but why get rid of me?"
I DON'T KNOW.......SEEMED LIKE A GOOD IDEA AT THE TIME.
"well, it isn't."
"I agree with Brat Girl," Tobias says speaking up. "I can't believe I just said that."
NEITHER CAN I!
"Now who's here?" Marco asks.
CRAYAK....DUH!
"What is wrong with everyone?!" Rachel screams, "They all seem different!"
I GOT A HAIRCUT TOO!
Brat Girl rolls her eyes.
WELL, I LOOK BETTER. WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE ANYWAY?
TO DESTROY BRAT GIRL, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
BRAT GIRL.
BUTTTT....I WANNA KILL HER!
NO ME!
ME!
ME!
"WE WANNA KILL HER TOO!" the Animorphs cry.
"Why does everyone want to kill me?" Brat Girl asks shocked. Everyone quiets down and looks at each other.
"Seemed like a good idea at the time." Cassie finally replies.
Brat Girl sits back down. "Uh, okay then, continue what you were doing."
ME!
ME!
"US!"
This goes on for another five minutes until a "uh-oh" is heard.
WHAT WAS THAT?
"ICQ," Brat Girl answers.
ICQ?
"Yep. It's a chat thing. It's probably Veggie Freak. Can I go answer it?"
"No....but I will." Marco says and disappears. Seconds later, he appears in front of Brat Girl's computer. "Nice computer. " He sends Veggie Freak a message.
"Hello, you stupid person. I realized something today, I'm much smarter than you. and also, You'll never get Biff! I will....Wha ha ha ha!!!!!!"
Not waiting for Veggie Freak to respond, he shuts down ICQ, and returns back to the others.
"Well, that should take care of your friendship with Veggie Freak." Marco smiles smugly.
"NOOOOOO!!!!!" Brat Girl screams. "I'm going to kill you....wait until my next story!"
"Uh-oh." Marco says backing away from Brat Girl, "That's not good. She's getting her powers back."
"But that can't be! " Ax yells, "The Book......"
Screw the book.
HEY! NOW HOW ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO TELL YOU AND ME APART?
Duh! I'm in lower case bold, and you're in caps.
OH. DOESN'T MATTER ANYWAY....I GOTTA GO GET MY NAILS DONE.
"I thought you're a guy. " Tobias says.
I CAN BE ANYTHING......HEY CRAYAK! WANNA JOIN ME?
SURE! BEATS THE HELL OUT OF STAYING HERE.
Good! Now that they're gone. he he he! I can "deal" with you guys.
"The thing I want to know is how did you get your powers back?" Ax asks.
"It was me!" Everyone turns around to see who the voice came from.
"VEGGIE FREAK?!" Everyone, except Brat Girl, yells.
"Yep, that's me. " Veggie Freak says with a smile.
"But how?" Rachel asks.
"I have this watch....and it has a magic 8-ball on it!"
Yep! and guess who she let borrow it! Brat Girl proudly shows everyone the watch which is on her arm.
"But how?" Cassie asks.
Doesn't that just seem to be the phrase of the day.
"Well, when someone, Marco I guess, sent me that little message, I knew it wasn't Brat Girl."
"How?" Rachel asks.
"Will you let me finish you nitwit!" Veggie Freak yells, " "she" wrote in the message, that'd "she'd" get Biff.....She would never want Biff."
"Who's Biff?" Jake asks.
He's...
"None of your business!" Veggie Freak screams, glaring at Brat Girl.
"Okay, Okay, Just asking, "Jake says taking a step back.
"But anyway, when I figured that out, I used my powers to come here and then I used my powers to put the watch on Brat Girl's arm. "
And here we are now.
"Since you have your powers back, I suppose you're going to torture us." Tobias says with a sigh.
Maybe.
"What do you mean by maybe?" Jake asks.
"Yea!" Veggie Freak adds, glancing evilly at Ax.
I just don't know if I want to make this a torture fic.
"Well, I do!" Veggie Freak yells, slowly sliding over to Ax, "Don't you agree, Axy-baby."
Ax quickly morphs back to andalite. < NO! Last time you made me become a model and then made me jump into a vat of boiling oil. >
"But it was fun. " Veggie Freaks says smiling wickedly. Ax quickly brings up his tail for defense.
Calm down you guys....sheesh.
< But she started it! > Ax complains.
Will you just shut up! And I think it's time for you to go back home, Veggie Freak!
"What?! NO!! I wanna stay here!" Veggie Freak whines.
Sorry......bye. Brat Girl snaps her fingers and Veggie Freak is gone.
Ooops! I forgot something. She snaps her fingers again, and Veggie Freak is back.
"What now?" she asks.
I forgot to tell you that'll I'll return your watch when I'm done. Kay? bye. BG snaps her fingers....and you know.
Brat Girl stretches and then adjusts her glasses. Hmmm......what should I do?
"Let us go peacefully?" Tobias offers.
No. Too easy. And the readers wouldn't like it.
< So? >
Oh, just shut up. I'm sorry I can't figure out what to do.
"Can I be of help?"
Huh? Oh hi, Andalite Girl.
"Veggie Freak told me you were writing a cliche story. And since you're such a No Talent Ass Clown......"
Hey! I'm very talented!
"If you say so.....anyway, I thought that you might need some help to make this torture fic really good. "
But I don't want to make this a torture fic.
"Too Bad." Andalite Girl snaps her fingers and a group of five guys appear. They are, yep you guessed it.....
N'SYNC!
"Where are we?" Lance asks, "And why are we here?"
"Brat Girl's writing a story." Marco tells him.
"Who's Brat Girl? And who are you?" Justin asks.
"I'm Marco. " Marco says and points to Brat Girl, " and the girl over there in the loud shirt is Brat Girl."
Um....hi. Brat Girl smiles weakly.
"Nice Shirt, BG. " Chris says.
Uh.....thanks. Brat Girl turns to Andalite Girl. What the heck are they doing here?
"I thought maybe you could torture them. "
"WHAT???????!!!!!!" n'sync all screams at once.
"Better them, than us, " Rachel adds.
HOLD IT! HOLD IT! I thought I said I didn't want this to be a torture fic....
"You did, like ten times..." Jake says.
"What else can you do with n'sync but torture them?" Andalite Girl asks.
"You could listen to our music," J.C. suggests.
"I'd rather make out with Paco, The Spanish Speaking Idiot."
Huh?
"You wouldn't understand."
Okay. I'm getting bored with all of you.....Let me go put on a CD.
"It better not be the n'sync one!" Andalite Girl screams.
Don't worry. he he he.
Music starts to drift in.
"It's tearin' up my heart when I'm with you,
but when we are apart I feel it too
and no matter what I do I feel the pain with or without you."
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!" Andalite Girl screams, "STOP IT!"
Lance, Joey, Chris, J.C., and Justin start dancing. Pretty soon all the Animorphs join in. Tobias just flies around and Ax looks confused.
< I understand what Jake, Cassie, Rachel, and Marco are doing, but those other humans scare me. >
"They scare me too, Ax, " Andalite Girl tells him, "They scare me too."
Okay. That's enough of that.
"Awwww." everyone but Andalite Girl whines.
"THANK GOD!" guess who that came from.
Time for another CD.
Music starts to drift in again.
"You are my fire
The one desire
Believe when I say
I want it that way."
"NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!" N'sync screams, "Not THEM!!!!!!!"
What? It's just......The Backstreet Boys.
"NOT THEM! ANYONE BUT THEM!"
I like this CD. I'm leaving it in. Brat Girl appears again.
"May I ask what is with the music?" Cassie asks, "This is supposed to be a fanfic."
"Oh, yea. Sorry. I'll turn it off. Brat Girl snaps her fingers and the music stops. A second later, screams are heard then five guys land on top of Marco.
"Ow! Why me?" Marco whimpers.
You're just so much fun to abuse.
"Thanks......I think."
The five guys stand up, leaving the crumpled Marco on the ground.
"Where are we?" Brian asks.
"This sounds crazy, " A.J. says, "But It looks like we're on a blank page in Works. Everything's white."
Actually its the letter writing thing in AOL. It's the only place where I can type something and save it in txt.
"Who are you?"Kevin asks.
Oh, I'm Brat Girl. I'm a fanfic writer.
"On Fanfiction.net?" Nick asks. "I've been there before. Some of those writers are pretty messed up people. Have you ever read the stories about us?"
Scary, I know.
"So why are we here?" Howie asks.
"Yea! You never did answer that!" Joey adds.
"AAAAAHHHHH! What are THEY doing here?" BSB all ask at the same time.
"We were wondering the same thing about you. " Lance says glaring at BSB.
Well, Andalite Girl brought N'sync here. Brat Girl stops to glare at AG, then continues. And when I snapped my fingers to turn off the CD, you guys suddenly appeared.
"Not actually suddenly, " Marco says, "you guys fell for a while and then landed, rather hard, may I add, on me."
"Sorry, dude. "A.J. tells Marco.
"No prob, ribs mend."
Okay. Now what am I supposed to do with you?
Everyone looks around at everyone else and shrugs.
Oh! I'll just do something stupid. Brat Girl snaps her fingers and Visser Three appears.
< Hey?! Where am I?, > He asks, < I was just about to kill someone. > He turns around and looks at everybody.
< ANDALITE BANDITS! > He screams. < No...wait a minute......there's only one Andalite. Who the hell are the rest of you? >
Let me explain.......Those guys over there.....the stupid looking ones......
< Which ones? >
The ones hanging with the Andalite.
< Ah! >
They're the Animorphs. And the even stupider looking ones are......
N'sync smile and look smugly at BSB.
N'sync.
"Hey!" they yell, "We resent that."
I don't care. The other group, the cute looking guys, are the Backstreet Boys.
BSB smile, "Thanks BG."
No prob. Now since this story is supposed to be a cliche, I'm going to cause clicheish things to happen. Just go along with it.
"I'm scared." Marco whispers.
You should be. Brat Girl snaps her fingers and Marco and Cassie start making out.
"Hey!" Jake screams, "Get away from my girl!"
"Sorry, Jake, I was going to tell you." Cassie mumbles while frenching Marco. "But, I've always liked Marco, I was using you to get to him."
"WHAT!?"
"Yep, " Marco mumbles, "sorry, bud."
Jake starts attempting to strangle and beat up Marco.
Want a pillow? Oh never mind. That's for Tobias. BG snaps her fingers again and Marco lets go of Cassie and starts to french Rachel.
< AAAHHH! > Tobias screams. He quickly morphs human and starts beating Marco.
"Who's beating me?" Marco asks.
He he he!!!!
Jake heads towards Cassie to kiss her. But Visser Three grabs Cassie before he can get to her.
< Back off, she's mine! >
" OH Visser!" Cassie swoons.
< Oh...whatever your name is...do you like UNO? >
Rachel all the sudden stops kissing Marco.
"Get off me!" she screams and pushes Marco aside.
"Just when it was getting good too." Marco grumbles.
"Rachel!" Tobias runs too her.
"Tobias!" Rachel runs towards him, "GET OUT OF MY WAY!" Rachel runs Tobias down and heads towards Visser Three, who is in human morph, and Cassie who are seriously making out.
"Get away from my MAN!...er.....whatever!" She screams.
Meanwhile N'sync and the BSB, just watch in a state of awe.
"These are seriously messed up people. "
"For sure."
"Hey, how about we go get a pizza."
"Okay."
Where do you think you guys are going?
"To get a pizza."
But you can't do that!
"Yea we can, " Brian says, " We have our own magic fanfic 8 ball." he snaps his fingers and both groups disappear.
"NOOOOO!" Andalite Girl screams, " I didn't get to torture them yet!"
I'm getting sick of you! BG snaps her fingers and Paco, the Spanish Speaking Idiot appears.
"Que esta continuando? Donde estoy? Huelo la pizza?"
"Aahh! I'm out of here!" Andalite Girl snaps her fingers and disappears, presumably to find and torture n'sync.
"Hey, el amor, como es usted?"
Ahh! Go away! Paco disappears.
Brat Girl looks around to see what else has happened while she was making paco appear and disappear.
Rachel and Cassie are fighting over Visser Three.
Jake and Tobias are sitting by them selves looking quite dejected.
Marco and Ax are no where to be seen.
Hey, where did Marco and Ax go?
"Ax went away with N'sync and BSB, mumbling something about pizza and cinnamon buns, " Tobias says.
"And Marco, after having five guys fall on him, getting beat up by both me and Tobias, and just being rejected by everyone else, went to a doctor.....and not just the kind who gives you medicine for a cold, if you get my drift."
Oh. Poor thing. he he he.
At that moment Ax returned slightly bruised but happy. He had half a pizza box, the other half was in his mouth, and half a bag of cinnamon buns, you know where the other half went.
"Pizza boxes are not nearly as good as pizza, peza, za, it self, is," he says while he attempts to eat the rest of the box, "nether are cinnamon bun, un, bags."
Ooooookay. Why are you bruised?
"Oh, while I was at the pizza place, those two groups of male humans, N'sync and BSB you call them, em, got in a fight and I got a chair thrown, rown, at me."
I'm sorry Ax.
< It could have been worse, orse. >
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!"
"CRASH!"
What the heck was that?
Marco sits up and hobbles to where everyone is. He is on crutches, one of his arms is in a sling, the other one is covered with bandages, one leg is broken, and he has a black eye.
"Why can't I just snap back on my feet, like everyone else, " he mumbles, "but, noooo. I have to fall and land hard on my butt."
What happened to you?
"Well, as I was heading to the doctor, I stopped off to get something to eat. " Marco explains.
Pizza?
"Yep, how'd you know?"
Call it a ......lucky guess.
Marco shrugs and continues, "Anyway, when I got there, chairs and tables were flying around. I tried to get out of the way but a table leg hit me in the eye. I couldn't see, and as I was going down the stairs I tripped and broke both my arm and my leg. "
Poor thing.
"Could you maybe just...snap me back to shape?"
Um............no.
"COME ON!"
I'll think about it. Till then, how about you go lay down. Brat Girl snaps her fingers and Marco is tied down to a bed......
"Hey!"
and gagged.
"Heemmmhhh!"
That takes care of him......Now what about the rest of you? Brat Girl thinks a minute and then snaps her fingers. Visser Three disappears.
"Hey where did my Visser-Boo go? " Cassie asks.
"He's my Visser-Boo!" Rachel screams.
"Is not!"
"Is too!"
You guys are acting like kindergartners! "snap"
"Waaaa!" Cassie screams, "Me wanna go home!"
"I want my mommie!"Rachel yells.
"snap"
Rachel and Cassie's parents come to take them home.
"Thanks for taking care of them." Rachel's mom says.
"I don't know what came over them." Cassie's mom adds, "Lately they've been acting strange, and now this."
"We will be taking them to the mental hospital, as soon as we can."
Good. Bye now. "snap"
Now, who's left?
"Me." Jake says.
< Me. > Tobias says.
"Meph. "Ax says, while he attempts to eat the rest of the Cinnamon Bun bag.
"Meph! uh typh meph yu fuffel fufer!" Marco attempts to scream, even though he's gagged.
Hmmm...all guys. Brat Girl thinks a moment. Naw...that's messed up...can't do that.
All the guys look at each other.
"Gulp" I don't want to know what she was thinking. " Jake whispers to Tobias.
Hmmm......
"Stop in the good name of fiction!"
Wha? Hey! Let go of me!
Two men in white coats grab Brat Girl and start hauling her away.
Who the heck are you?
"We are Dr. Halsy and Dr. Iwanagohom from the Bad FanFicton Authors Containment Center." (a/n: If this isn't the right name....sorry....and also I apologize for stealing this from who ever came up with it, It is cliche after all.)
Well, what do you want me for?
"You will find out soon."
Why?
"there is no time to explain. We must go now."
Butttt....
"snap" goes the fingers of Dr. Iwanagohom, and Brat Girl, Dr. Halsy and Dr. I. disappear.
"Hooray!" Jake yells.
< They're gone! > Tobias yells.
"Yah...waf a munfant, she diffnt unfif me! Helf!" Marco yells, even though he's still gagged.
< Too bad, they didn't bring Cinnamon buns with them. > Ax said who had morphed back to his old self.
"Hey, I bet the early morning donut shops are open, by now." Jake offers.
< Good, Lets go! >
The few remaining Animorphs disappear.....except Marco.
"Hey! Whaf afof me? Helf!"
Meanwhile......at the BFFACC........
Hey you can't do this! I want to see my lawyer!
"Actually, yes they can. " a girl says.
Who are you?
"I'm Fishie." Fishie replies.
Oh yea....I luv your fics...Hey! What happened to my powers?" Brat Girl screams.
"Sorry Brat Girl, but I need my watch back." Veggie Freak, who suddenly appeared, says.
"Oh fishsticks."
"Don't you mean Fishflaks?" Fishie asks.
"No." Brat Girl grumbles, "Hey Veggie, can't you get me out of here?"
"Okay, okay....let me put on my watch. Yuck! Dog hair!" okay "clap"
Brat Girl appears back in her own house.
"Yes! I'm home!"she screams.
"What? ______ are you still up? Go to bed, young lady!" BG's mom yells.
"Butt mom......."
"GET TO BED!"
"Okay, sorry."
Brat Girl heads to the computer to turn it off.
"Helf! Helf! Helf!" Marco screams from deep inside the computer or internet or where ever.
"Oooops, I forgot about you, Marco Boo. He he..that rhymed."
"Hah Hah! Gef me ouf of fer!"
"Sorry......no more powers." Brat Girl goes to shut down.
"NOOOOOO! donf push thaf but...........
The end......or is it..........
Also: Check out my homepage! Go up to author profile...and check it out! It's not quite done yet! but go anyway! t'anks. =)
