Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. Or the "Making It Hail" joke. That belongs to Daniel Tosh. Enjoy.


Boredom's wrath spurns an imbecile action.


Kakuzu strolled aimlessly throughout the Akatsuki base. He sighed, "Why is the base so freaking quiet?"

He tossed open the door to the living room carelessly. Normally, he would find Sasori mending his puppets and Tobi drawing in his coloring book. Occasionally, Zetsu might be babysitting Tobi or photosynthesizing by the window. Kakuzu shuddered at the thought.

He sauntered into the dining room, where Itachi would typically be attempting to converse with Kisame, but would be continuously interrupted by Deidara's attempts at smart-ass remarks. Yet, once again, the room was desolate. The stunned man entered every room, only to find that all were empty.

Nearing the final room, Pein's office, Kakuzu hesitated. 'What should I do if he's there?' he silently pondered. He exhaled heavily, then opened the opened the door. He immediately regretted it.

Pein was kneeling beside his bed, blowing his Gedo Path, Nagato. Without thinking, Kakuzu reached into his pocket, threw a handful of nickels and dimes at the two, and then hauled ass out of there. He felt the blood drain from his face.

"Oh sweet baby Jesus," he sighed breathlessly. Kakuzu shuddered as the graphic memory re-engraved itself into his mind.

*insert_line_break*

Meanwhile, in Pein's office, the "fun" continued.

"Oh, Kami, yes," Nagato moaned wantonly. He threw his head back, panting whorishly. The ginger glanced at the office's door with half-lidded eyes. His face flushed at the thought of Kakuzu walking in on him again.

'Maybe I should invite him to one of our sessions sometime…' he mused.


A/N: Story number two, up and running! Thanks to Daniel Tosh for his comedic genius...without him, I could have never written this.