This is what happens when I try to write a Peddie fic.

I suggest not reading this if you ship Mabian or if Mara is a favorite character of yours.

Disclaimer: I do not own House of Anubis.


Patricia's POV:

"What did you two do?!"

"I-I have no idea. It just saw us and sprayed!"

Nina and I looked at each other and bursted out laughing. This was just too funny.

Fabian and Eddie had gone on a hike, and apparently found a skunk and it sprayed them. They claim they didn't go near it or tried to bother it, but it had still sprayed.

"Mommy, can I-," a voice sounded behind me. Eddie and I's three year old, Nadia, ran into the kitchen.

She immediately crinkled her nose. "What is that smell?"

I picked her up and put her on my hip. "Daddy and Fabian were being idiots and a skunk sprayed them."

"Hey!" Eddie protested, but I ignored him.

"What were you going to ask, baby?" I ask Nadia.

She thought for a second. "Oh, can Aria and I watch Bubble Guppies?" she said, referring to Nina and Fabian's daughter.

I looked at Nina, who shrugged.

"Sure. One of us will be in in a minute to help you put it in," I told Nadia and put her down. She ran back into our play room.

"Patricia, do you think you could handle all this? I'll go watch over Nadia and Aria, you can take care of these two," Nina offered.

I looked at Fabian and Eddie who were looking through the cabinets.

"Sure, but you owe me!" I told her.

Nina smiled and ran off to find the kids.

"Now for you two, come with me," I said, and walked into the backyard.

"You know, Yacker, you don't have to treat us like we're children!" Eddie said as he walked out onto the padio with Fabian.

"You know, Weasel," I said, mocking him, "you two didn't have to be such idiots!"

"So, um, I found the tomato juice!" Fabian interjected, not wanting us to get in an argument.

I glared at Eddie for another minute before looking over and Fabian.

"Great! Now, let me just find that pool," I said, looking around for the kiddie pool.

I found it under a bunch of crap that Eddie had. I dragged it out into the middle of the lawn and looked over at Fabian.

"Where's the tomato juice?" I asked him when I didn't see it in his hand anymore.

"We finished it, Yacker," Eddie said in a 'duh' voice.

I looked at him blankly.

"What do you mean, 'finished it'," I asked him.

"We drank it," Eddie said, pointing to the empty can sitting on the table.

I looked at him blankly.

"Why would you drink it?" I asked finally.

"You're supposed to drink tomato juice to get rid of the skunk smell, Patricia. Fabian told me," Eddie replied.

I looked at Fabian.

"AND HERE IS THE ALMOST CLASS VALEDICTORIAN, EVERYONE!" I screamed as loudly as I could and clapped.

"Trixie, what are you doing?" Fabian asked me. Eddie looked at me like I was a maniac.

"I think kissing Mara messed with your brain," I told him.

"PATRICIA!" Fabian exclaimed, looking around, amost guiltily. Maybe he never told Nina...

"Fabian, darling, you're supposed to bathe in it, not drink it," I said slowly, like I was talking to a child.

He 'ohhhhhed' and Eddie's mouth dropped open.

"Are you kidding me? I just drank that stupid stuff for nothing!" Eddie complained and hit Fabian in the back of his head.

"Well, sorry!" Fabian replied, rubbing the back of his head.

"Now, strip," I told them.

Fabian paled and said "what?" while Eddie looked at me crazily again.

I sighed. "So you two could get the stink off. Nina will wash your clothes while you two soak in tomoato juice. Now, everything off except your boxers."

Eddie quickly removed his pants and shirt while Fabian took a while.

Finally, Fabian had peeled all of his clothes off and handed me his clothes.

"OMG you don't have a six pack?!" Eddie squealed like a teenage girl. Fabian blushed.

"I go to the gym, and just cry, okay?" Fabian snapped.

"Or too much canoodling with Nina maybe," Eddie said, looking Fabian up and down.

Fabian somehow blushed even more, but didn't say anything. Well, that clears that up.

"Wow, dude, I didn't think you had it in you!" Eddie slapped Fabian on the back.

Fabian turned even more red, and didn't make a sound.

I laughed. "Eddie, don't embarass our friends. Now, I will go give these to Nina to wash."

After giving the clothes to Nina and grabbing another can of tomato juice, they were ready to bathe.

When I got back, Fabians entire face and ears were red. Eddie was whispering stuff to him, which ceased when I got close.

"Hello, darling Patricia!" Eddie said when I got up to them. He wrapped his arms around me and gave me a kiss on the cheek.

I pushed him off of me. The skunk smell only had gotten worse.

"Eddie, what did you say to Fabian? I think he's going to turn into a tomato," I said as I started to pour the juice into the pool.

"Oh, nothing really. I was just telling Fabian the consequences of his canoodling," Eddie said innocently.

I stood up and looked at Eddie. His facial expression showed he clearly thought nothing was wrong with that.

"Fabian," I said finally, "I'm really sorry for my husband. He was dropped on his head when he was a baby and never fully recovered."

Fabian shrugged like he knew that already. The redness of his face had went down a lot.

"I'm still standing right here!" Eddie told me.

I started putting the rest of the juice into the pool.

"Yes, weasel, sadly you are," I sighed.

Finally, all the tomato juice was poured in and the boys were soaking in it.

"Well, see you two later!" I said, turning to go back in.

"You're leaving me out here with him?!" Fabian cried, referring to Eddie.

"Don't you worry, Fabian. By the end of this, Fabina will be ready to have fun!" Eddie chirped.

"Patricia, please do not leave me out here with him!" Fabian pleaded.

I looked between the two and sighed.

"Fine. But only because Eddie is acting like a three year old," I said, and sat down on the ground.

We sat in silence for a few minutes before Eddie started talking.

"So, Fabian, how often does Fabina canoodle?" Eddie asked him.

Fabian groaned and rolled his eyes.

"But seriously. Patricia and I are around once a month," he winked at me, "but from what it sounds like, Fabina goes at it more than that."

Thankfully, Nina opened the door and came running out with Nadia and Aria, who ran onto the swingset Eddie had set up a while ago. Nina walked over to us and raised an eyebrow.

"Why is Eddie talking about 'Fabina'?" Nina said her own couple name with awkwardness.

Here we go again. Eddie's face lit up with delight.

"Well, Nina, Fabian took off his shirt and I was all 'wow you don't have a six pack' and he made up a lie about going to the gym and crying, then I said something about too much fooling around with you, Nina, and he blushed and looked down so Patricia and I knew that was true and I told him the consequences about you too canoodling, and just then we were talking about how often you two do it," Eddie explained, pleased.

Nina looked totally lost and somewhat amused.

"I always regret allowing Eddie to speak," Nina muttered as she sat next to me.

"I don't think they would have a muzzle big enough to fit him," I whispered to her. She let out a little laugh.

"Hey, Fabian?" Nina said.

Fabian looked over at her. "Yeah?"

"How did you share a room with him?" she asked.

Fabian shrugged. Eddie looked offended, and I was laughing.

"Again, I am right here!" Eddie cried out. That just made me laugh harder.

Then I remembered something.

"Fabian, did you ever tell Nina what happened at the senior dance?"

Fabian's eyes widened. "Shhhhh!"

"What happened at the senior dance, other than Eddie proposed?" Nina asked.

"Oh, he never told you? That's strange, considering you two canoodle every night," Eddie said.

Nina narrowed her eyes. "It is none of your business how often Fabian and I 'canoodle', creep."

Eddie held his hands up in surrender. "Well, I would've thought Fabian told you that he-" Eddie was cut off by Fabian pushing him under the juice and holding him there.

Fabian gave a forced smile, and looked at Nina. "Nothing happened, love, they don't have a clue on what happened!"

And then Fabian realized that he had basically told her something had happened and squished his eyes closed.

"Nothing happened either!" he quickly added.

Nina rolled her eyes, obviously not believing him.

"Well, first, would you let Eddie up? As annoying as he is, we don't need someone going to jail for killing him," Nina said, referring to the struggling Eddie under Fabian.

Fabian reluctantly got off Eddie, and Eddie sat up, coughing and wheezing.

"That was not cool!" Eddie exclaimed once he could talk. Fabian just shrugged.

"What happened during the senior dance?" Nina demanded.

Fabian sighed and sunk lower into the juice.

"Fabian?" Nina said, raising an eyebrow.

"Mommy, come help me on the monkey bars!" Nina's daughter called.

It was Nina's turn to sigh. "One minute, Aria!"

Eddie looked very displeased. "Are you kidding me? He was saved by his daughter!"

"Oh, we're not done. I'll be back in a few minutes," Nina said, getting up and going to where Aria and Nadia were.

Immediately, Eddie turned on Fabian. "What? Why aren't you telling her? It's not like you had freaking sex with Mara!"

Fabian didn't say a thing, he just turned away.

"YOU HAD SEX WITH MARA!" I screamed, disgusted.

Eddie, in the meantime, was cracking up.

Fabian looked like he was about to kill me. "You do realize Nina and the children just heard that? And the rest of the world?"

I looked over to where Nina was standing. Nadia and Aria kept playing, seeming to not hear anything, but Nina was glaring down Fabian.

Nina turned to talk to the kids, and then started walking towards us.

"I would tell you to run, Fabian, but I don't want tomato juice all over the house and I don't think you'd want to run down the street like that," I told him.

He shot me a look.

"Fabian, why the hell..." Eddie couldn't talk as he was laughing too hard.

"Fabian," Nina was standing right in front of him by now.

Fabian gulped and turned to look up at her. "Hello, beautiful. How are you today?"

Nina glared at him.

"Trixie, go get some popcorn! It's about to get good!" Eddie called to me.

I rolled my eyes. "Go get your own!"

"I would, but, lets see, I'm covered in tomato juice and I don't want to miss this!" he said back to me.

I rolled my eyes again and turned my attention back to Fabian and Nina.

Even though Fabian was obviously petrified, he had a little, fake smile on his face. If looks could kill, Fabian would've been dead five times over.

A few long seconds passed before Nina spoke.

"Would you like to explain yourself, Fabian?"

Fabian looked like a deer in head lights. "Uh... You look pretty today, Nina."

"Fabian," Nina warned.

By this time, Eddie had moved over so he was sitting directly in front of me. He turned to me and whispered, "he wants some."

I hit him on the back of his head. He whined in pain, which went unnoticed by Fabian and Nina.

"Well... We kissed at the senior dance, and we were pulled apart by KT," Fabian said.

Nina nodded. She had been introduced to KT when she had come back to England.

"And, well, afterwards, Mara pulled me into her room and started taking off my jacket and shirt and kissing me and stuff. I guess I just got caught up in the moment. I'm sorry, Nina," Fabian apologized.

Nina nodded slowly. "So, basically, she made you?"

Fabian hesitated. "More or less, yes."

"She's better known for the things that she does on the mattress," Nina and I said at the same time. We looked at each other and bursted out laughing.

Eddie and Fabian had confused expressions on their faces. "What?"

"Nothing, nothing, it's part of a song," Nina said once she calmed down.

They just nodded.

Nadia came running up to me with Aria behind her.

"Mommy, I'm tired," she said. Aria nodded in agreement.

Nina looked over at me. "Do you think the smell is at least almost gone?"

I nodded. "Yeah, it's been about two hours."

"Well, then, Fabian, put on your clothes-," Nina was cut off by Eddie.

"I wonder how often you have to say that," Eddie snickered.

"And we're going to go. Aria's quite tired," Nina said, ignoring Eddie. She had Aria perched on her hip.

Fabian quickly re-dressed. "Thank you for saving me, love," he said, kissing her cheek.

"You're still not off the hook. Come on, let's go home. Thank you Patricia, bye Eddie," Nina said, walking off. Fabian followed his wife, his head down.

"Good job, weasel, you scared them off," I said to Eddie once they had left.

"I'm the one that scared them off? What about Nadia? She got Aria tired!"

I rolled my eyes. "Come on, sweetie, lets put you down for a nap."

Nadia followed me to her bedroom. She quickly got under the covers of her bed.

"See you later," I said, as she fell asleep.

When I walked back into the living room, Eddie was sitting on the couch, not even dressed, watching who the hell knows what.

"Eddie? What are you doing?" I come up behind him.

He jumps a little, but turns his head. "I got bored."

I sighed, and took a seat next to him. He put his arm around me. "You didn't have Fabian to tease anymore?"

"I was not teasing him!" He defended. "I was asking him valid questions about his and Nina's love life!"

I laughed a little. "Sure you were."

"I was!"

I rested my head on his shoulder and yawned. "You are ridiculous."

"Everyone thought I was going to turn out to be the sex crazed one. But no, Fabian is."

I pushed my head further into his shoulder. "Why are you so interested, anyway?"

He started to rub my arm. "Fabian is so... I don't know, mature, or something. It just doesn't seem like his thing."

"Then what is his thing?"

"Watching his subject of affection from afar."

The way he said it was hilarious. I started laughing.

"Well, it's true! The term when I came, he just watched Nina from afar after they broke up! I don't understand how you survived the first term!" Eddie kept talking, making me laugh even more.

I finally calmed down after a few minutes. "And what's your thing?"

"This," and he swooped down to kiss me. The kiss only lasted a few seconds, as Eddie had to pull back to yawn.

I laughed. "Wow."

He shot me a glare.

I snuggled back into his shoulder. "I love you, weasel."

Even though I couldn't see it, I know he smiled. He planted a kiss on top of my head.

"I love you too, Yacker," he said as he put his head on top of mine.

Together, we fell asleep, into a land of name calling and love.