Hey everyone. This story was brought to you by Madam Pomfrey's Fun Fitness, Herbology Hangout, Insane Prompt Challenge, Magic Kingdom, Around the World, and Magical Catering: Hogwarts Feasts assignment on Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. For Madam Pomfrey's Fun Fitness I wrote for Cable Row Machine's Traits of stubborn. For Herbology Hangout I wrote for the pairing of Oliver/Marcus. For the Insane Prompt Challenge I wrote for prompt number 262. Dialogue of "My cooking's not that bad, is it?". For Magic Kingdom I wrote for Meet and Greet Beauty's object prompt of book. For Around the World I wrote for Camphor Cutting Board's word prompt of slice. For Magical Catering: Hogwarts Feasts I wrote for task 2 which was to write about having to cook. Warning for fluff. Word count without Author's Note is 663. I hope you all enjoy Cooking Disaster.

Marcus Flint stifled a small laugh as he watched his boyfriend of three years Oliver Wood standing over the cook book he'd just picked up on his way home from the Quidditch stadium. He could still see the smile on his boyfriend's face when he charged through the door with the book in one hand and a bag of groceries from one of the recipes in the other.

"What are you doing?" asked Marcus the chuckle not lost in his voice.

"I'm trying to cook us a healthy meal, Marcus," Oliver sighed standing up and turning towards Marcus, arms folded over his chest. "It's not as easy as it looks." He scanned the recipe and then moved to fetch the cutting board.

"I'm afraid," Marcus admitted, "but I also want to see if you can actually do this. So go ahead. Show me what you've got, Wood." Marcus sat down at the kitchen table and watched the sandy haired man fetch the knives and other utensils he'd need to cook. "What are you making for dinner tonight by the way?"

"Chicken Fried Rice," Oliver told Marcus impatiently. "Now I've got a lot of cooking to do. Please me get to it."

Marcus held up his hands in surrender and leaned back in his chair. "I'm right here if you need any help," he told Oliver as the shorter man started to chop up some of the vegetables in the bag.

Oliver could feel Marcus's eyes on his back as the finished chopping up the onions, carrots, and other vegetables for the rice. He quickly ran and got a pot of water. Setting it on the stove to boil. He then went back to the cutting board and began to cut up the chicken.

"Shouldn't you have washed off your cutting board before starting in on something else?" Marcus asked warily. He'd seen the chefs on many Muggle cooking shows doing thusly and figured it they did it, it was the right thing to do.

"You watch to many of those Muggle cooking shows, Marcus," Oliver sighed as the pot of water began to boil over the edge. Muttering curse under his breath he raced over and put the rice in the water turning it down to simmer after covering it. "I know what I"m doing. The directions are very easy to follow." He held up the book. "It's all in here."

"Hopefully what's in there translates to what's out here," Marcus laughed.

"It will. Just wait and see."

Marcus laughed again.

"My cooking's not that bad, is it?"

The laughter continued as Marcus continued to watch Oliver cook.

He continued to slice the meat into the pieces he thought were the appropriate size. He then cooked them until they were the color he thought they should be. A billow of smoke came from the rice pan. Another curse erupted from Oliver as he turned the burner off. Or so he thought. Oliver sank to the floor tears forming in his eyes. He'd never failed this epically in his entire life before.

"Babe," Marcus called standing up and walking towards the fire extinguisher.

"What?" Oliver sobbed and then looked over his shoulder. A string of curses went up as he raced away from the burning food on the stove. "Where the hell is the fire..."

Marcus rushed over blasting the fire extinguisher at the burning stove and it's contents. Turning the knobs to turn off all the burners he continued to fire the fire extinguisher until the flames had died out all together. Putting the spent canister down he turned to Oliver.

"We'll go out to eat tonight," he told Oliver pulling the shorter man into a kiss. "Maybe I could teach you a thing or two about cooking one of these?" He pulled Oliver towards the door and on their way to dinner.

I hope you all enjoyed Cooking Disaster.