Wow, this is the first fan fiction I have published on this site since I was younger. First of all, thank you for taking the time to read this. I appreciate it.

I would like to put up a few disclaimers before hand. First of all, I do not own any rights to the Kingdom Hearts franchise, just the games that have been created. Second of all, this fan fiction is about Riku as a mortician, so that means there will be talks about death. A lot. If you are sensitive about that subject, I would advise reading with caution. Third of all, this story will contain some coarse language (nothing too bad), and references (non-explicit) to sex, so if you are sensitive about that content, proceed with caution. Other than that, please enjoy. Thanks again for taking the time to read this story, and any praise and/or constructive criticism is not only welcome, but highly encouraged.

P.S. I have read, re-read, and re-re-read this story to correct any typos that have occurred, but I am not perfect. If you spot any typos at all, please let me know, and I will fix them as soon as possible.


Chapter 1: Of Sleeping with Friends and Funeral Homes

Riku ruffled the bath towel over his head, drying his longish silver hair as he stepped out of his apartment's bathroom. The dark gray, button-down shirt he intended to wear was slung over his left shoulder, but he had already put on his dark jeans, which were held up by a black belt.

"You got another call?"

Riku's aquamarine eyes darted over to his bed. A woman with disheveled, ashen hair and red eyes sat on the side, holding the sheets up to cover her naked body. Her name was Paine. She was a good friend of Riku's.

"Yeah..." Riku sighed. He took his shirt off of his shoulder and put it on, quickly buttoning it up. He said, "it's the life of a mortician. I'm on call twenty-four hours a day." Paine nodded.

"Who is it this time? If you don't mind me asking," Paine stretched out on the bed, laying on her stomach. It was apparent that she was not ready to start the day.

"Someone's daughter. A little girl. I have to go to the hospital to pick up her body," Riku went over to his dresser and opened a drawer. He pulled out a pair of socks and put them on as well.

"Are you sure you're up for it? You were pretty wasted last night," Paine watched as Riku moved around his bedroom, slipping on a pair of shoes and grabbing his wallet and keys off of the night stand.

"Yeah, I'm fine...I took an aspirin," Riku grabbed his phone and put it in his pocket, "hey...can I bum a couple of smokes?"

"Take the case. I don't mind," Paine shrugged. She then yawned and stretched.

"So, when do you want me out of here?"

"You can stay," Riku said as he fished Paine's metal cigarette case and lighter out of her jeans, "you should probably get some more sleep, since I kept you up all night."

"Don't mind if I do," Paine smirked, "how long do you think you'll be out today? I can pick up dinner or something if I end up sleeping really late."

"Sounds good," Riku checked to make sure he had everything, "alright, I'm out of here. See you later?" He picked up his work bag that was placed by the doorway. Could not forget that.

"Yeah. I'll probably stop by my place to get some clothes and come back," Paine nodded, brushing her bangs out of her face.

"Spare key is on the counter."

"Okay...Riku?"

"Yeah?"

"...Are you gonna be okay today?"

Riku looked over at his friend. She stared back nonchalantly, patiently waiting for an answer. Her face neither held a hint of judgment, nor pity. Though she was expressionless, he knew she was concerned about him. He sighed again and lowered his gaze. He wanted to say 'no', he really did. He wanted nothing more than to crawl back into his bed and sleep the day away, but he could not. He had a life to live. Too bad he had given up on living it months ago.

"...Yeah. Don't worry about me," He flashed her a quick smile, "See you when I get back."

"Yep."

Riku walked out of his bedroom, leaving Paine to sleep. He locked his apartment door before making his way down to the residents' garage. He got to his car and unlocked it, getting inside and closing the door. He hesitated to start the vehicle as a thought popped into his head.

They had gone through with it.

He and Paine had sex yet again.

It was becoming a semi-normal thing now. He would call her up and ask her to go out to Dream Eater with him. They would get there, chat up Shiki the bartender, get completely drunk, then go back to Riku's apartment and lock themselves in his bedroom, not emerging until the morning or until Riku got a call to go into work. He was unsure how it started. One night, he made a move on her and it just...happened. Now, it was almost a surety every time they drank together. Her brother Leon, Riku's friend, was aware of their little situation. He was not too happy about it, but he did not officially object to their affair. Leon knew why Paine and he were doing this. All of his friends knew. It was just another way to cope.

Just another way to try and forget about...her.

Riku gripped the steering wheel and rested his forehead on the backs of his hands. Just the fleeting thought of her filled his heart with agony. It had been three months, and he was still not over the death of his fiance'. He could still remember the accident. The car speeding through the intersection even though it was a red light, and practically running Kairi over in the cross walk. He remembered her whispering 'I love you' to him as he held her, waiting on the ambulance to take her to the hospital. He remembered her passing away in his arms at the hospital when they had to take her off of life support but a week afterwards. He remembered everything. How he wished he could just forget.

Yet he could not forget. Her memory was the only thing he had left of her. He had moved out of the apartment they shared together. He gave Kairi's younger sister Namine' all of her possessions after the funeral. The times they shared together and the pain of knowing he would never hear her voice, see her face, or touch her skin again was his only connection to her. She was gone, and she was not coming back. A single tear welled up, and slipped down his cheek.

What a great fucking way to start the day.


Riku put his cigarette to his lips, sucking on the butt of it to inhale the smoke. He needed it. Today's cadaver was a rough one to deal with. Children were never easy. After he arrived at Hikari hospital to pick up the deceased, he met with the family of the young girl. He had learned that she was a cancer patient, and had been battling the disease for years. Finally, her body just gave out, and she passed away the night before. She was only ten years of age. The family was understandably distraught. Riku consoled them, and gently discussed with them preparation of the body and funeral plans. They wanted her to be buried within the next twenty-four to forty-eight hours. The whole time Riku was with the family, he was compassionate and sympathetic. His heart went out to them. Afterwards, Riku transported the body to Heath & Halloway, the funeral home he worked at. After making some calls and preparing the body for embalming, he went out to the back of the building for a smoke break. He really had to be careful. If he did not watch himself, before he knew it he would become a chain smoker.

Many questioned why Riku decided to receive a degree in mortuary science after he graduated from high school. Everyone had it in their heads that he would go on to become a savvy businessman, a lawyer, or maybe even a blitzball star, since he was such a good athlete. However, those were not the paths he wanted to take. He was not interested in making a ton of money, he did not like confrontation, and the life of a famous blitzball player was utterly unappealing. He wanted his life to mean something, and he felt that this path could provide some sense of satisfaction for him. Yet, when he first announced to his friends that he wanted to become a mortician, they kind of freaked out.

"You wanna be around dead people!?" Yuffie practically screamed. He could still picture the black haired girl's horrified expression. It was not easy pursuing his career path. Other students at his college often shunned him because of his chosen profession, so most of the time, save for when he was with Sora, his best friend, and Kairi, he was forced to hang out with other mortuary science students. The program was stressful. It was also draining, mentally and emotionally. Not everyone he started the program with ending up graduating with him. Yet, he persevered.

It may have sounded weird, but he found the job fulfilling. He was the person that would be there to ease the hurt of grieving loved ones in their hour of despair. He was able to provide comfort and closure, even a shoulder to cry on from time to time. He did not regret his choice of career.

Yet, it still got to him whenever he would have to deal with a dead child. A life so full of promise and potential cut short, often by completely unfair circumstances. Whenever he had to embalm a child, he had to work extra hard to desensitize himself. Most days he would be able to work through it, but today was just awful.

Maybe it was because the deceased girl reminded him of a younger Kairi. She really did look like her. Her hair was red and reached her shoulders. He peaked at her eyes when he got the chance and saw that they were a similar color to his fiance's. Her skin was a similar tone to Kairi's. And her face held that same air of innocence. Looking at that young girl on the cold, metal table filled his heart with grief.

I am losing it...Riku thought. He took a another drag on his cigarette. Today was just not a good day for him.

"Riku!"

He looked up and saw a spiky-haired brunet, and a spiky-haired red head walking towards him. The two were Sora, and Riku's other friend, Lea (who also liked to be called Axel).

"Sora, Lea...what are you doing here?" Riku pushed off of the wall he was leaning against. He took one last puff on his cigarette before throwing it on the ground, stubbing it out with his heel.

"I called Paine earlier since you weren't answering your phone, and she said you had gone in to work. So we decided to bring you lunch!" Sora grinned and held up a paper bag. The smell coming from it was intoxicating.

"I bet you haven't eaten since you woke up this morning," Lea smirked.

"Fuck no," Riku said, "All I managed to snag all day was a coffee. Thank you so much," He took the bag from his best friend.

"Are you both off today?"

"Well, I don't know about Lea, but I am," Sora smiled, "I worked a twelve hour shift at my hospital last night. I actually just woke up not too long ago." He grinned sheepishly, scratching back of his neck.

"I hear ya...Paine and I were up until three this morning. When I left she was going back to sleep," Riku opened the paper bag and pulled out a box, taking a peek inside. Teriyaki veggie burger. Hell. Yes.

"Oh really? And what were you two up to at three a.m.?" Lea wriggled his eyebrows suggestively.

"You already know, so don't ask," Riku rolled his eyes. Lea always wanted to know the details of his sexual escapades. Pervert.

"You and Paine have been hanging out a lot lately," Sora tapped his chin in thought, "are you sure there's nothing going on between you two?"

"I'm sure, Sora," Riku said, "look...I don't even know what to call this thing between me and Paine. We're certainly not dating, but...I don't know. She's okay with it though, that's the only reason it's continued this long."

"You know Leon's not too happy about it," Lea crossed his arms, leaning against the back wall of the funeral home, "being the overprotective brother and all. I think that he thinks you're using Paine."

"Maybe you should talk to him about it, explain what's going on with you two," Sora said.

"I would if I could," Riku shrugged, "he knows why we're doing what we're doing. You all do."

Sora's and Lea's faces fell at the comment. Boy, did they know.

"I still miss her..." Sora spoke softly, his azure eyes looking down at the ground. Riku sighed. He did not have to say a name for Riku to know who he was talking about.

"You and me both," He said. He patted Sora on the head, ruffling his unruly hair.

"Y'know, when you first started partying and drinking and sleeping around after Kairi's...y'know, death, I thought you had already gotten over her," Lea lightly punched Riku in the shoulder, "it kind of pissed me off at first, to tell you the truth."

"I know...it's just...how I'm coping right now." Riku gave him a lopsided smile.

"Be careful, man. You don't want your "coping" to start interfering with your job," Lea nodded, imitating a sage-like air.

"We're here for you, you know that right? You don't have to suffer in silence." Sora said, looking concerned. Riku gave him a small smile and nodded.

"Thanks."

"So, what are you planning to do after you wrap up here?" Lea asked.

"Head home. If Paine's still there, I anticipate that she got us dinner," Riku shrugged, "then I was just gonna go to sleep. I'm really tired."

"That's your own fault for staying up so late," Sora raised an eyebrow.

"I know, I know...I won't be going home for another few hours. I still have to submit paperwork to request a death certificate for the new body, and start making arrangements for the actual funeral."

"Who is it this time?"

"...It was a young girl. Cancer patient."

"Well...shit. That sucks," A sad look came on to Lea's face, "how's the family holding up?"

"They're devastated, of course," Riku looked down, thinking. It was not too long ago that he was in their position, helping to prepare a final departure for a loved one. He wondered how long they would grieve, and in what way. Would the mother shut herself in her room, like he had done for the first two weeks after Kairi's death? Would the father spend his days drinking the pain away, as he himself had been doing? Would they end up fighting with each other, as he had done with his parents when they first found out about his "coping" methods?

"They'll get through it, as long as they're there for each other," Sora said, a kind smile on his lips.

"...Sure thing," Riku smiled back, "Alright, well I'm gonna take this food inside. I only have a little bit of time left before I have to get back to work. Thanks again for bringing it."

"Anytime, Riku," Sora nodded, "I guess we'll go now. Call me when you get off your shift if it's not too late."

"Will do," Riku saluted his best friend.

"Alright, see ya later," Lea gave him a quick hug, before he and Sora walked off. As soon as they got in Sora's car and drove off, the smile that Riku had on his face disappeared. He rubbed his temples and sighed again. He felt a headache coming on.

He just wanted this day to be over.


To be continued.