Forgive Me
A KyoxTohru Story
Based on the manga Fruits Basket
Based on the chapters 1 till 120

Summary
Kyo couldn't forgive himself for what he did to Tohru's mother. He blames it as his fault. What happens if Tohru confessed her love for him? How would he react? What if Akito didn't come to find Tohru?

- I do not own Fruits Basket. Wished I did though
- My very first KyoxTohru story
- Spoilers to chapter 33 and 120

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The rain finally stopped pouring. However, the sun wasn't out. Everything stopped. Everything went still. Not a single bird was found, the trees weren't rustling, and the wind was silent.

All that was moving was the clenched fist of a certain guy. It was shaking violently.

"I ran into her again on that day. I've thought about calling out to her. And just as I was mulling over it, a car sped out right out of nowhere. As I watched the car headed for your mother, my heart knew it was bad news. I had to save her, all I needed was to grab her hand and pull her towards me, to hold her. But…but…because I'm not 'human' if I were to hug her, I'd turn into a cat and everyone would know…that I'm not human. I watched her…I watched her die."

The boy felt tears welling up in his eyes, the painful memory ripping his heart apart.

"If I had pulled her back then, if I had done so, she wouldn't have been hurt so badly. She wouldn't have…suffered. She wouldn't have…DIED!"

Tears started falling from his red orbs. He couldn't control them anymore. It hurt to see the girl that managed to give him hope die in front of him. It…hurt him.

"But then, I had to choose between myself and your mother's life. In the end, I chose 'myself' over her. Protecting 'myself' was more important…Someone like me…"

His eyes went huge. His voice began to choke and tremble. He bent forward slightly to ease the pain in his stomach and sniffed.

"My mother died in an accident too. But she wasn't run over by a car. She said she was sorry…for giving birth to someone like me. She said I was very pitiful…That I'll have a hard life, and that she's unable to stay with me. The next day, after having cried again…she died!"

He held his heart and squeezed his eyes shut.

"All of it…It's all my fault! I'm the one that took theirs lives! IT'S MY FAULT!"

Kyo Sohma stood up straight but continued to stare at the floor. He took a deep breath and let his tears flow down his cheeks.

"I'm the one…who caused their deaths."

The girl standing in front of him was lost in words. She couldn't believe what she was hearing. The man she loved was found guilty of her mother's death. This is too good to be true! Her legs began to tremble, her tears flowing unconsciously off her eyes, her body stiffened.

"Your mum said when she saw me standing there, lying in her own blood. She said… 'I'll never forgive you'… I'm sure…"

Kyo covered his eyes.

"That's what I heard. I wasn't able to do a thing. My whole mind went blank. My emotions were so messed up. And I…ran from there."

Kyo looked up to the sky, hands still on his face.

"That's why… I kept telling myself that it was all Yuki's fault. I can blame everything on the 'villain'…Satisfied, I got back on my feet, and I went straight to where Yuki was. But I never imagined…that I would run into you…after that. It took me so long to let the memory slip me, until you showed up. It was like a message from her to me to not forget…"

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Yuki moaned and opened his purple eyes. He heard noises coming from outside. It sounded like Kyo. He walked over to the window and gasped. Kyo was actually crying…in front of a girl.

"That's why… I kept telling myself that it was all Yuki's fault. I can blame everything on the 'villain'…"

Yuki frowned and walked away from to window to get dressed.

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"Can…can you…forgive me now? I ran away, I'm always running always running away. Even after I met you, I acted as if I never noticed. I never said a word. Not about my irritation, or my fears. I never intended to get so deep. I never intended to…fall in love. I…can't forgive myself."

Kyo felt his tears emerging again, the pain in his heart getting worse.

"I can't forgive myself anymore. And I…no longer want…your forgiveness either…"
'Enough is enough'

As he began closing his eyes, the girl stunned him with her response.

"I WON'T FORGIVE YOU!"

Kyo looked at her with hurtful eyes. He was surprised she said it. The sweet and kind Tohru Honda who forgives anyone easily is actually not forgiving the cat. What hurt him more was the sad look she planted. Her tears fresh from her eyes, her pale face, and her quivering lips.

She frowned and with all her courage, she looked at Kyo straight in the eye.

"Is that what…I'm supposed to say?"

Kyo could just gasp at her remark.

"To forgive…or not to forgive…are those…the only options I have?"

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Yuki finally finished changing and walked down the stairs. He heard Tohru's loud shout and blinked.

"To forgive…or not to forgive…are those…the only options I have?"

It wasn't like him to eavesdrop but seeing Tohru and Kyo crying must be a real deep conversation. He needs to make sure Tohru won't get hurt by the stupid cat.

"'I'll never forgive you'? I don't believe mum would ever say something like that!" She tightened her fist together. Her fingernails were digging into the flesh.

Kyo was dumbfounded. He just stared at the girl opposite him with shock.

"But even though, I don't believe it. In that case, I…I'll…I'll have no choice but to rebel against my mother!"

Tohru let her tears fall out unable to hold them in anymore. She bent forward to stop the pain in her stomach just like Kyo did earlier.

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Yuki was shocked at her sudden outburst. He decided to leave them be but her next outburst put in on the spot. He froze at what he heard.

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"Even so…Even so…Why won't you…Why won't you acknowledge… That I love you, Kyo?!"

Kyo stared at the girl crying in front of him. His eyes were huge. Tears stopped flowing down his eyes. Too many emotions filled his heart.

Happiness, sadness, guilt, pain, worries…etc….

He doesn't want to accept the fact that she actually loved him. He couldn't…

"Come on…" he stared. "Get real…There's no way…"

Tohru was going numb. Kyo doesn't believe she loves him. More tears fell from her eyes. She was anything but happy.

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Yuki heard her confession but Kyo's words made him angry.

"That idio-" he slammed the door opened and yelled at Kyo. However, he was surprised to see the cat running away.

"Kyo…wait up!" Yuki started chasing after the man. Before he did, he ordered Tohru inside the house.

"Stupid cat… I'm going to give him a piece of my mind for hurting Tohru!"

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Kyo doesn't know where to go. His mind was blank. He went scared at her confession and didn't know how to act. He rejected her, he rejected her! Water was blinding his eyes as he ran into the woods. Tree branches scratched him all over his body and face. Roots tripped him over and over. He was lost, lost in thought and route.

He finally stopped beside a river and fell on his knees. He is a scaredy-cat like all the Sohmas said. He was afraid of his feelings, his memories, and his decisions.

"Why? Why must it all turn out like this?" Kyo buried his face into his hands and cried out everything. His rage, his sadness, his guilt, and his love.

He had hurt the one thing dearest to him, his diamond, his Tohru. He heard rustling noises again and stopped crying. It's got to be Yuki since he was the one that could catch up with him that fast.

"Baka neko!" (Idiotic cat) Yuki roared as he kicked Kyo into the river from behind. Kyo wasn't in a mood to fight.

"Why the hell did you do that? Hurting Tohru is not what you would do would it?! I don't understand what is going through that thick head of yours but Honda-san is not the type of girl you toy with!"

"WHO SAID ANYTHING ABOUT TOYING WITH HER YOU RODENT?!" Kyo's sudden outrage made Yuki's anger rise.

He punched Kyo right on the stomach and sent him flying out of the water. He sat on top of the wet boy and continued punching his cheek.

"You were always there for her! And every time she is with you, she's always smiling that smile, wasn't she?" Kyo's mind was starting the blur up with all those hard punches. He didn't even have the energy to fight.

"Do you honestly think she would've smiled like that had it been me by her side instead?! Give me a break! Don't you think… it's about time you realized there are some things which only you can do?!!! Get a hold of yourself and stop making her cry!" Yuki finally stopped punching the beaten up boy and got off him.

"How can you… How can you…" Kyo looked up to see Yuki actually crying. He sat up and looked into the other boy's eyes.

"How can you run away like that after hearing those words you longed for from the person you admire most?" Kyo felt a stab in his heart.

"How dare you, you stupid rat?! You have no right in telling me what to do in my life! You have no right to cry in front of me! If you're so mad of me hurting Tohru, then why don't you go love and protect her yourself?!!!"

"YOU BEAST!!!!!!!" Kyo didn't know what happened next. He lost his consciousness.

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Tohru watched the rain starting to pour again from her window. Her thoughts were only occupied by Kyo.

"Get real…There's no way…"

"But I do…" she sobbed. She covered her mouth and something hit her. Something rather…disgusting. Kyo's real form.

It smells, it looks horrible but she kept searching for him. The stench almost made her throw up but she won't give up finding him.

She followed the stench to see Kyo screaming at himself.

"STOP IT!"

"Kyo!" she shouted holding her stomach. Kyo turned to her and growled.

"Just leave me alone!" he shouted. "What are you doing? What do you think, you can accomplish by following me here?"

"Kyo…"

"I TOLD YOU TO LEAVE ME ALONE!" he shouted again. Tohru just stood there, holding a branch for support.

"What is wrong with you? Do I not frighten you? Does my smell not disgust you? It makes you feel sick, doesn't it? It disgusts you, doesn't it?! Why do you even care?!! I DON'T WANT YOUR PITY!!!"

Tohru kept going. "But…Kyo…I…I want to…" Kyo snapped.

"DON'T TOUCH ME!!!!" Kyo swung his long arms roughly at her direction tearing her shirt at the same time. Not only that, but he also left a cut through her arm and neck.

"GET LOST!!!!" he shouted not caring about the wounds.

"YOU ANNOY ME!! YOU'RE NOTHING BUT AN EYESORE! TRY THAT AGAIN AND IT'LL BE YOUR FACE I GO FOR NEXT! STAY AWAY FROM ME!!!!!!!!"

"I'm so sorry Kyo. I truly am. I am an eyesore to you, aren't I?" Tohru cried harder and hugged her knees.

"I'm so sorry Kyo! I love you so much!"

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"YOU ANNOY ME!! YOU'RE NOTHING BUT AN EYESORE! TRY THAT AGAIN AND IT'LL BE YOUR FACE I GO FOR NEXT! STAY AWAY FROM ME!!!!!!!!"

No matter what he shouted to her, she just kept coming. She hugged his arm not caring about the stench anymore.

"Let's go home, Kyo. Let's go home…Together! You have to! You can't stay here! You can't stay like this!"

"Stop it! Just leave me! Don't you understand?!" Kyo felt useless. Never has he felt so much pain before.

"No, I don't understand any of this!" she shouted burying her face deeper into the hand.

"This other you… It scares me hearing you speak in a voice that doesn't sound at all like… like the Kyo I know. Seeing you in this form…it terrifies me to pieces. "

Kyo's glare softened.

"But…but…I want to understand…I want to try and understand… from now on, I want to be there for you when you're troubled, just like you've been there to comfort me and listen to me when I'm feeling down. I won't let you be alone!"

Kyo blinked at her words and felt tears stinging his eyes.

"Whatever your pain, whatever you fears, your insecurities…we can always work them out…TOGETHER!"

Kyo's eyes went as wide as it could.

"I want us to be together…to have our meals together, to study together, and worry together… just as we've always been doing…TOGETHER!"

Tohru began to tremble. Her eyes were overflowing with tears.

"I JUST WANT US ALL TO BE TOGETHER!!!"

Kyo opened his eyes to find him in his bedroom, on his bed. How did he get here?

"Why would…someone like you…stay with someone like me? Why would you cry for me?"

"Even so…Even so…Why won't you…Why won't you acknowledge… That I love you, Kyo?!"

"Tohru…" he sighed letting tears fall from his eyes yet again.

"You were always there for her! And every time she is with you, she's always smiling that smile… wasn't she?"

Kyo got off his bed and out of his room. His eyes focused on the floor most of the time. His stuffed his hands into his pockets and scrunched his nose. The wounds Yuki gave him still stings and it's all over his body.

"Do you honestly think she would've smiled like that had it been me by her side instead?! Give me a break! Don't you think… it's about time you realized there are some things which only you can do?!!! Get a hold of yourself and stop making her cry!"

Kyo stopped walking as he realized where he was. He heard weeping form inside the room. "Tohru…" He had hurt her so much. He couldn't stand it anymore and turned the doorknob. He saw the girl hugging herself near the window looking at him with wide eyes. His heart was beating fast. He walked closer to the crying girl.

"How can you run away like that after hearing those words you longed for from the person you admire most?"

Kyo leaned down and held her shoulders. "Please Tohru. Please don't cry…" he pleaded. Tohru looked away from him and sobbed harder.

"I'm sorry Kyo… I'm sorry for being such an eyesore to you. I'm sorry…" Kyo wanted to scream. She thought she was an eyesore to him.

"Tohru, don't ever think that! You're not an eyesore you're…"

"A pain?! I'm a message given by my mother to remind you of her death!?" Kyo was taken aback. She had never seen Tohru this heartbroken before.

"Tell me, Kyo. Was it truly your fault my mother died, or the driver's fault?" Kyo was speechless. He doesn't know what to reply.

"Even…even though you are responsible for my mother's death… Even if I am angry at you… I will continue to love you, Kyo! Please understand my love for you!"

"Tohru…"

"I am serious! I am 'getting real' since that day you changed into your true form, I've had had a crush on you already. Because of my feelings towards you, I went into the woods to find you, Kyo! Why else would you think I came after you!?"

Kyo watched the girl hugging herself. She was in deep pain.

"Tohru… I…I…I love you too…" Tohru stopped weeping and looked at Kyo's narrowed eyes.

"I had always…loved you. Something in my heart kept telling me to help your mum look for you when she lost you. But… I was too late. Yuki brought you to your mother first."

Tohru eyes widened. "The hat…"

"It's mine. Yuki had it then." Tohru went silent.

"You see… After that day, I kept thinking about you, and your mother. Wondering if you two are okay. I don't count that as love yet but… You living in this house made me… realize I … do love you. I dated Kagura before, yes I have. But after meeting your mother and hearing about you, we broke up. I…"

"Kyo… What are you talking about?" Kyo chuckled slightly while wiping his tears away.

"I love you, Tohru Honda." The smile he gave her was full of passion. It was warm, caring, and soft. Tohru smiled and hugged the cat.

As expected from the cursed boy, Kyo transformed into a cat and wept in Tohru's arms.

"Please Tohru, please tell me you'll love me back. You're the first girl to actually make me feel so much feeling in one go. Passion, nervousness, worry, relaxed, happy…calm. All Kagura gave me were pain and suffering from all those rough martial arts actions she calls 'actions of love'. You're the only one I truly love."

The orange cat snuggled more into Tohru while she held him tighter. "Kyo, I love you. Understand that. Only you will make me happy. Without you, I am nothing. Even though if you transform everytime your chest comes in contact with a girl, I will always be there for you."

Kyo looked up at her with teary eyes and purred. Both of them stared at each other for a very long time. Little did they know that a certain rat boy was looking at them.

Yuki Sohma smiled and turned away. "Honda-san, please take care of that furball…"

He gave one last look at the two and went in search for Machi. It was time he told her his true feelings as well.

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THE END

Special thanks to: Natsuki Takaya

Sorry for the errors. Some scenes and dialogue are taken from the manga itself (especially those which starts with conjunctions…)

Thank you for reading!