Suprise, Surprise Katsuya
by Double Dragon (aka Kawa and Chandler)
Chapter 1: Breaking the Habit
Pairing: Jou-Yuugi (one-way, that is)
Archived: FFN, and others as necessary. contact us if you want it: double_dragon@mad.scientist.com
Kawa's Notes: Songfic for this chapter only. Jou-Yuugi. Slightly angsty. Something of my first YGO fic. We haven't really decided where this fic goes in the YGO timeline, it's something of an alternate universe within Domino...all we know is that it happens after the four-ep incident where Jou-kun nearly kills Yuugi. Oh yeah, and we've set up the fic so that everyone calls him Katsuya-kun.
Disclaimer: Breaking the Habit, as a title/song, is not mine, it's Linkin Park's. Yu-Gi-Oh and its characters aren't mine either, they're all owened by Kazuki Takahashi. Surprise, Surprise Katsuya, and the character Jounouchi Katsuko, are shared property between Katrina T. (aka Kawaii Dragoness) and Chandler M. (aka icedragon541).
~~
[lyrics] thoughts "speech" emphasis
*currently: saturday night, winter*
[memories consume
like opening the wound
i'm picking me apart again
you all assume
i'm safe here in my room
unless i try to start again...]
Jounouchi Katsuya sat in bed, the lights all out, his father away as usual. It had been so difficult...the past few days had been so traumatizing, and so strange, and so surreal...he fought back the tears, as he often did nowadays. Life had been so good before, with all his friends. It hadn't been nearly so awkward. It hadn't--it hadn't hurt him. Maybe it had, physically. And after that whole thing with Malik and nearly killing Yuugi--
Yuugi. His friend...his best friend, the one he always thought understood him...
[i don't want to be the one
the battles always choose
cuz inside i realize
that I'm the one confused]
Why had it happened this way? What had gone wrong? Friday...Friday afternoon at the roof of the school, his favorite spot to just sit with Yuugi and talk...
*flashback*
Jounouchi waited impatiently for his friend, leaning back against the fence. His left hand twined into the wires of the fence, his right index finger crossed against the middle finger. Lady Luck had been treating him rather well lately. It was like she had been watching, lovingly, over her favorite person in the world. Let's just hope she still likes me enough to let me go through this the right way, then I'll ask for nothing more...
Yuugi entered slowly, moving up towards the blonde boy. "Hey, Katsuya-kun."
Jou had to smile--his friend was here. "Hey, Yuugi. Y'know how they made a new theme park outside of Domino?"
"Yeah! It looks great--haven't been there yet though..."
Jounouchi nodded. "I was wondering if we could go together sometime, hang out, get on the rides--" Just the two of us, he thought as he was cut off.
"Yeah! We'll go together, with everyone else too! That's a great idea, I'll call everyone else up--Honda and Otogi and Anzu and Mai and Ryou and--"
"Um, Yuugi...I...I was kinda thinking that we'd go alone...."
"Huh? Alone? But--but--but isn't that, um, a little--oh, I see...Katsuya...I'm sorry, but..." Yuugi blushed slightly, looking downwards. "I--I can't."
"You can't? But what about that whole time, with Malik, when you said you loved me?!"
"I meant it like brothers! Besides, you were nearly about to kill me. Drastic times mean drastic measures, okay?!"
"But--But Yuugi, I--Is it Anzu?"
"Not at all..." Yuugi blushed, again. "It's a little--a little stranger than that, I guess you could say..."
"But who's left? Does that mean--Ohhhhh shit...." Holy motherfucker, does that mean-- "YAMI?!"
Yuugi nodded, looking down, now as red as the tips of his hair. "I--I'm sorry, Katsuya-kun, I just--" And he ran off, not looking back.
Jounouchi slumped down on the fence until he sat, sighing. Lady Luck, have you left me? I thought you liked me. He couldn't move. The world had gone still, and it felt like the Black Magician had just stabbed that staff into my heart, shattering it into pieces. He was gasping for air--he was dying--it hurt too much, it hurt, it hurt, it hurt--
*end flashback*
[i don't know what's worth
fighting for
or why i have to scream]
And it's still broken...no amount of cleverness could put it back together.... He sighed. Ever since that day, nothing had made sense...his dad had left...he hadn't eaten much, but he never felt hungry...
He remembered getting home, all alone, lying down and starting to cry. He felt so weak...so weak...it was so senseless to cry, but he couldn't stop crying, the tears just wouldn't stop streaming downward his cheeks, his eyes would keep burning, his heart would keep breaking...physical pain was nothing, in comparison to what a person could do to emotions, twisting them around. He remembered their history--Yuugi defending them against Ushio...all their adventures against Pegasus, and Battle City, and the whole deal with Malik and their duel...
[i don't know why i instigate
and say what i don't mean]
...And how Yami always seemed to be there for Yuugi, defending him when Jounouchi could not, doing everything for the little boy. How Yami was always with Yuugi, how Yami was the only one who knew what was going on in his friend's head. Jou would do anything for someone who would understand him that way.
[i don't know how i got this way
i know it's not alright
so i'm breaking the habit
i'm breaking the habit
tonight]
That first night, Jounouchi had cried himself to sleep on the couch, the tears staining it. He just wanted someone to understand him...he just wanted to be understood, he just wanted someone to care about him...
He wanted someone who could be his friend and more than his friend at the same time, a person who'd gone through everything he had, both the good and the bad; a fellow duelist maybe, someone who could understand and laugh at all his jokes and games. Someone who knew everyone else he knew, but was seperate from them all at the same time. Yuugi always said that his other half was one of the few people that could do something like that.
What would it be like, he wondered, to have his own other half?
[clutching my cure
i tightly lock the door
i try to catch my breath again
i hurt much more
than any time before
i have no options left again]
Saturday afternoon, Jounouchi had gone to the arcade, thinking he'd play a few games to get his mind off of what had happened before. However, it wasn't working. Too much of the day felt like he was forcing himself--he wasn't having any fun. Not winning anything didn't help either.
God, my luck streak really has gone out. Where's Lady Luck when you need her?! She abandoned me when I tried to ask Yuugi out! And now--and now...
He kicked one of the machines dejectedly and left, hands thrust in his pockets, searching for someone to just talk to. Honda and Otogi'd probably just laugh at him for liking Yuugi. Yuugi himself was entirely out of the question. The girls wouldn't understand anything...girls never do...
He passed by the Really Big Mall Place, intrigued. I do need some more shoes... Oooh, Steve Madden just opened up shop here. I hear they're really big in the States and in Tokyo.
He went into the store, feeling relieved for some reason. The first thing he saw was a pair of fluffy slippers, purple with dog pawprints. Those are cute! I'll buy them for Shizuka, but...hmm...those leopard prints...they do look warm, and the apartment floor is really cold in the mornings...and it is winter... He bought them, blushing a little at the salesclerk who kept asking why he was there. He kept making up stories, from his fashionable girlfriend to his little sister, but none of them really went off. Nevertheless, he left the store actually sorta happy. It was odd, considering that well, he was male, but...shoes are shoes, and that floor will stay cold, fluffy slippers or not. He left them in the living room when he got home, not really knowing why.
[i'll paint it on the walls
cuz i'm the one at fault
i'll never fight again
and this is how it ends]
And here he was now, sitting up in bed, with the lights out, thinking. I am never going to act like a girl again. That slipper thing was the last straw. It's gotten me into too much trouble, between that poison man and Yuugi and the salesclerk and my shoes--I'm just not. I'm gonna be completely straight, and I'm gonna like to do guy things, and gonna want to flirt with girls, and I'll be completely normal, and it'll all be okay someday.
Something kept bugging him--something about Lady Luck and misunderstandings--but he had to let it slide. Tomorrow was a new day, and he was gonna keep his promise, and not let anything stop him. He vageuely wondered what would happen if he had his own other half. Yuugi seemed happy enough with his. Didn't he deserve a little bit of happiness too?
[i don't know what's worth
fighting for
or why i have to scream
but now i have some clarity to show you what i mean
i don't know how i got this way
i'll never be alright
so i'm breaking the habit
i'm breaking the habit
i'm breaking the habit
Tonight]
And meanwhile, the stars aligned, people plotted, mistakes happened, and it looked to some like an angel had fallen out of the sky...
to be continued
