"Swaddle him."

Peter nearly shrieks in surprise when the Cloak of Levitation wraps around him and pulls him from his position on the kitchen ceiling. He had just got home from school and the first thing on his mind was to get a snack, but then he saw Stephen in the adjoining common room in his meditative state. Not wanting to disturb the sorcerer, he motioned for Ned to be quiet-the other boy was spending the night-and then silently kicked his shoes off before climbing the wall to the ceiling.

The cloak hovers in midair and Stephen approaches him with an amused glint in his eye after getting to his feet. "Hello Spiderling."
"H-Hey Mom."
Ned gapes at him from behind the sorcerer. "Dude! Did you just call Doctor Strange 'Mom'?!"
Peter turns bright red when he realizes he did in fact call the Sorcerer Supreme 'Mom'. Said man raises an eyebrow. "Is there a reason you're sneaking around?"
"I-I didn't want to disturb you! I was just getting a snack." Peter flounders in the cloak.
"At least you took off your shoes this time."

Strange motions toward the cloak and it gently sets Peter on his feet, and the teen immediately dashes for the cabinets. He pulls bags of chips, cookies, and every other version of junk food into his arms only to be given a disappointed look from Stephen when he turns back around. With a nervous laugh, he grabs a couple of apples from the fruit bowl on the island counter, rushes back over to his friend, and the two shut themselves in Peter's room.

The vigilante all but threw his collection on the ground as he plopped down in front of Ned while the other pulls out a Star Wars Lego set from his overnight bag. They had been looking forward to putting together the Death Star all week, and Ned was also eager to spend time at the Tower. He still tended to fanboy around the Avengers much to Peter's embarrassment, but some of the general idolizing wore off the more he came over.

"So...what's the deal with calling Doctor Strange your mom?"
Peter groans before shoving a handful of chips into his mouth. "I accidently called him that after patrol one night. You know how my dad has FRIDAY record everything?" Ned nods. "Well he sent the recording to Rhodey and Happy and they made the term stick. Now everyone calls him my mom."
"Dude. What is your life?"
"In my defense, I was half asleep."

Ned stares at him for a few moments before laughing and Peter throws one of the apples at him in retaliation.


Stephen puts away the last of the junk food that he had snuck away from Peter through portals and slyly replaces what he took with healthier alternatives. This wasn't the first time he had done it and it certainly wouldn't be the last. Peter would continue to try to hoard chips as his after school snack, but both of them knew that the sorcerer wouldn't let him have any of it for very long. To Stephen's dismay, Tony caught them in their routine after the third time and gave his boyfriend a knowing grin.

Actually, he did it every time.

Now was no different.

Tony snatches the small bag of chips from the sorcerer's hand, opens it, and takes a couple before offering some to the other. Stephen rolls his eyes as he takes his own handful and leans against the counter.

"...you're a total MILF."
"Jesus Christ Tony." Stephen pinches the bridge of his nose in exasperation.
Tony laughs. "Are you really that surprised?"
"No, I suppose not. I am surprised that I didn't have to come drag you out of the lab though."
Tony shrugs. "Came to check on our Spider-Baby. Guess he and Fred already scurried away."
"Ned." The sorcerer corrects.

The genius turns to the fridge when Stephen eats what is left of the chips and pulls out the container of blueberries. He tosses a small handful of those in his mouth and then promptly throws one at the sorcerer, snickering when it smacks him right in the middle of his forehead. Stephen glowers at him for all of ten seconds, makes an abrupt hand gesture, and Tony suddenly had blueberries flying at him.

"Shit!" He takes cover behind the wall connecting the kitchen to the hallway. "Using magic is an unfair advantage Stephanie!"
Stephen smiles wickedly. "All is fair in love and war."
Tony rolls his eyes at the cliche line. "Oh, it is definitely a war."


When Peter stepped into the kitchen a few hours later to grab some drinks, he froze when he found it covered in fruit remains. The ones responsible for the mess sitting non-chalantly at the table, skin stained with various shades of blue and red, and...making out. Of course they were.

The teen grimaces at the unwanted show.

"What the hell?!"

Tony pulls away from Stephen and grins at the boy.

"Hey Underoos. We're about to order pizza for dinner. Does Ted want a specific topping?" Tony ignores the sorcerer's correction of Ned.
"Um...whatever is fine."

Peter pointedly avoids making anymore eye contact with his parents as he grabs a couple cans of soda and races out of the kitchen. When Stephen stands up and walks away, the billionaire narrows his eyes.

"Where are you going?"
"Avoiding the responsibility of cleaning our mess."
He disappears around the corner and Tony looks around the disaster of a kitchen. "FRIDAY, get our usual pizza order...and tell Clint to come clean the kitchen."
"Yes, Boss."