A\N Honestly, I must have a stupid death wish myself writing this story. Please don't kill me! This story is all about what would have happened if things had gone differently during the episode "Attack on Gorilla City" in Season 3. I wasn't sure what to rate this, because it has a MAJOR character death, so you have been warned! I hope none of you are too deeply attached to Cisco . . .

Cisco's POV

I feel dazed. Standing in my cell, I look out the tiny barred window. After years of feeling pushed aside, I'm wanted, NEEDED.

By a killer gorilla. Just great.

I hear rustling over by Caitlynn, and when I look over, we've got Harry back! I have never felt so happy to see him. The good news even takes over the parts of my mind thinking about my plan. My exceedingly morbid plan.

"Snow?" Harry asks, looking up in surprise.

Caitlynn leans over him. "Are you okay?"

Harry groans and rolls over, then responds, "I have a headache, I guess and. . . " He leans over and sniffs himself.

I helpfully consider warning him, (I mean, I've only been here a day, and already smell like gorilla poo-doo) but by the time I've opened my mouth, Harry is already overpowered.

"Oh. Urgggh, I smell . . . Ooph."

Caitlynn offers him a wry but thankful smile. "That counts as okay."

As Harry hurriedly starts asking questions about Jessie, I look out the window again. I have an amazing view. . . Into the gladiator pit. I can see gorillas posting four big stakes out in the arena. Why aren't there five of them, if they are most likely for our imminent torture and execution? Not that I'm that interested in the details, thank you very much. Then I remember. I'm going to have to watch my friends die without me, because I am SPECIAL. Never has that thought put such a bad taste in my mouth. Right here and now, I promise I will not never see that happen. Either because we all have escaped, or . . .

I'm torn from my thoughts by hearing my name.

"Barry, Cisco, you guys all came for me!" Harry finishes, looking at me.

I smirk, but there's a tinge of defeat to it. "A city of evil genius apes? Sounded like fun." Planet of the Apes. Come ON, Ramon, you should have known.

Harry offers me a grim smile as he gets back to business and stands, brushing himself off. Oh, man, I really have missed him after dealing with H. R. . I mean, the guy did throw my stuff everywhere, but I respect his intellect. H. R. couldn't even remember a PIN number. His optimism grows on you, I suppose, but he still makes me want to start throwing stuff myself on a daily basis.

Harry continues, "Well, I don't deserve it, but thank you, Snow, thank you, Barry, Cisco," he nods to us each in turn, then looks in confusion at Julian. " . . . Indiana. "

I would burst out laughing were it not for the fact that I am in the same cell as the said interestingly dressed person, who I would not put passed punching me. Also there is the whole doom and gloom factor still hanging over the room. So I merely smile and nod in appreciation. Say what you want, but I can hold my tongue from time to time. Sort of.

Julian takes it just as well as I expected. He moves forward to the bars, summoning as much heat in his voice as he can, and says, "It's Julian Albert, thank you, and I came along for . . ." He looks at Caitlynn.

I raise my eyebrow. I'm not stupid. It's obvious that Julian cares for Caitlynn, or at least obvious to everyone but her. I see her looking at him curiously. I've worked with Caitlynn for a long time, and she's like my sister. Don't you dare break my Caitlynn's heart, Julian. I will hurt you. From the dead, if I have to.

Julian appears to chicken out. "I live for danger," he finishes, rather lamely if you ask me.

Wells, who has of course missed out on all the Julian drama, simply nods politely, and says, "Well, it looks like you came to the right place." I didn't know Harry had it in him.

Barry, who had been rattling his bars, sighed, and sits on his cell's floor. "I still can't phase through the bars. We have to find a way out of here so we can stop him," he says. For one of the few times in Barry Allen's life, he sounds discouraged.

Julian, ever the pessimist, flares at Barry. "You keep saying that, but what if we can't get out? What if we're stuck here; what if this is the way that we . . . "

Barry interrupts him quickly, but we all hear the unfinished question ringing through our heads. What if this is the way that we die? Thanks for being so positive in my final moments, Julian.

Barry continues, "Well, we can't think like that. While there's life, there's hope."

Well, that's about as good an opening as any. So I speak up, looking back out the window throughout, "And if there isn't life?"

Everyone turns to look at me. Barry spins so fast that if he didn't have super speed, I'd think he'd have whiplash.

He looks at me concerned, as he asks the question, " What is that supposed mean? "

And here comes the part where they completely hate this plan. Heck, I hate it myself. You see, I have this one crazy principle that insists I dislike any plan that involves my death. Deep breathe, Ramon. And . . . Talk.

"Grodd needs me to open a breach so he can attack Earth One." I give Barry a " duh" look and continue, "What if I wasn't alive to do that?"

Caitlynn looks startled. She raised an eyebrow and asks, "You planning on dying?"

I give her my own eyebrow raise, give a sort of half snort, half sigh, and then reply, "Only if you kill me."

Now Caitlynn really looks taken aback. I hate doing this to my best friend.

My other best friend is not taking this seriously. Barry makes an impolite noise.

I surprise myself and start defending my own murder. " Look, this is something we have to consider. Right now, I can't think of any other way to stop him; he'd have no other way of getting to Central City. "

Julian nods next to me. He says, "He's right. Cisco's death would change the newspaper headline in the future."

Harry looks confused, a new expression for him. "Headlines?"

Caitlynn looks at him apologetically, and whispers, "It's a long story."

Even though I know this plan needs to happen, to save lives, Mr. Pessimist doesn't need to sound so positive about this. I was hoping for some of "We can't kill Cisco," "We'd be lost without him," " Cisco's my best friend, " and so on and so forth. At least I have a supporter, I suppose.

Or maybe not. Julian keeps talking. "But it would also make another come true. The one about. . . Killer Frost."

Leave it to Mr. Albert to find the one hole in my plan.

Caitlynn does a double take and swivels to me, her eyes as big as saucers. She points to herself. "You want . . . me. . . to kill you?"

Yup. I officially hate myself.

"