Right. So, I'm back with a NaruSaku fic because I just felt in the mood to. XD I figured, I needed something like a break from my other stories. But anyway, enjoy. ^_^

"It's just that I wandered into the wrong bathroom. That's all, that's all." NaruSaku


Brief prologue by our blond mischief-maker:

I'm sure we all know those moments when we rush for the bathroom in a desperate urge to release our body's contents into the welcoming murky waters of the toilet. Sadly, it seems to have happened to me on a very unfortunate day.

...But maybe, just maybe, blossomed into something better beneath.

Or maybe I'm just crazy.


Konohagakure Village, 9:00 a.m.

Fifth Hokage Tsunade was looking over some very important files when a deafening thundering of feet from somewhere below the building in which she worked split the air. She muttered something to herself and rubbed her temples, sure that that was from the hangover she happened to acquire this morning because of excessive drinking last night. However, she quickly took back her assumption when it sent her eardrums vibrating furiously, but this time nearer.

Glancing up out of the window with her almond eyes, she caught a glimpse of an orange blur that sped past the building. Amused, Lady Tsunade stood up and tilted her head to the side, hoping to see the blur again.

Indeed, it was a person. A blond one at that. What was he doing, running so fast?

"Shizune," she called to the dark-haired woman respectfully standing in the room, not making a peep so far. "Catch him and call him over." She gestured toward the blond boy, who seemed to be running in circles in front of the big building.

Shizune took a look at the boy, and a startled expression settled across her face. "Yes...yes, ma'am."


Each footfall set puffs of dust rising and falling with rhythm. As much as Naruto admired his dust-rising skills, this moment required much attention and could not be ignored. Due to being prone to having instant, sudden attacks of diarrhea - this happened to be one of those attacks - he needed the medical help as soon as possible.

Really, Naruto didn't care where he ended up pooping. The only thing that bothered him - other than his current dilemma - is that once he started running today, his feet took a life of their own and would not stop.

Suddenly a dark green door popped up into his line of vision. It had a clear white sign emblazoned on it, which looked strangely like "Bathroom". Actually, Naruto wasn't sure where it was, but it just was near, barely out of his reach. In all the blur around him, and his dizziness, he could still see the door clearly.

Naruto was taking no mercy for the door.

For that single moment, he gained control of his feet once again, and charged headfirst into the green barrier.


Sky blue eyes blinked open, to stare at the comforting creaminess of the ceiling. A curious device jutted out of the ceiling, with four flat blades, but with curved edges so they weren't sharp. They were connected by a circular object that dangled from the ceiling by a metal chain.

A waste of some perfectly good ass-wallopers. They look like some things I would use on Pervy Sage if...if he's spying on the girls in the hot springs who were destined for me...If they weren't connected to that stupid wheel. I love the hot springs, they're so full of hot girls. Hot springs...wait, actually, where am I?

Naruto's strange train of thought now hovered over that question. A question mark hung ominously over the asked phrase, like a storm cloud looming over Konohagakure ready to strike.

Maybe it was the nine-tailed-fox spirit inside him, but he feared that something bad would happen to him if he didn't find the answer...soon.

Naruto scrambled to his feet and turned his head from side to side, inspecting the area he was in. He had, apparently, crashed through the green door, as pine green debris lay on the tiled floor. The tiled floor - it was swept and polished so immaculately that he could see his own reflection.

As much as he could see, there were about three sinks and five mirrors, a hand-dryer, and a garbage can which stood there for no apparent purpose. If not for the absence of stalls, he would have thought this as a bathroom.

Then Naruto caught sight of the door that was on the other side of the room, a sign taped onto it.

The words clearly read: "Girls only. If boys are discovered then they shall be beaten into bloody pulp."


Oh, no. No, no, no, no.

Naruto peeked out from behind his fingers, and so far, the the sign had not changed into something much more merciful. He had gotten his share of being beaten into "bloody pulp" already, and he did not want to experience the utter pain a second time.

He stood there for quite a while, hoping desperately that by the time that some time had passed, the sign would have changed. No such luck.

All problems with diarrhea put aside, panic began to mount inside him, and Naruto felt the sudden urge to pee as well as poop. Just when he thought that it was safe to creep out, that nobody would notice him, that he just happened to be an innocent soul passing along - just passing along, he told himself - a very familiar voice sounded from the other side of the door containing the threat:

"Ino, I think this spring is warmer!"

Hold my ramen. Isn't that...Sakura?

"You think so?" A higher pitched voice reached Naruto's ears. There was a faint sound of a splash, then water churning a moment after. "No! Sakura, quit trying to ruin my skin!"

"Don't you know, cold things make your pores tighten!" Sakura's charming laughter rang out.

"Don't even try, Big Forehead!"

"You don't know anything. Big foreheads are lovely! They're a clear sign of my beauty, representative of cherry blossoms, while you...you're just a jealous pig-face."

"HEY!" And with that, the girls began to bicker.

An arrow of sheer glee coursed through Naruto. Pervy Sage would be jealous of him: he spied on the girls without them noticing! And better yet, it was during an argument. Naruto found himself vaguely wondering how many gossip points it would be worth.


A bang and a crash. Suddenly the door flew open and a pinkette stood at the doorway with a blonde behind her, rage and tension in every part of her lithe body. Naruto was immediately pressed to the floor, and smooth hands flew over him, wrapping him in a material he never knew existed before.

The next moment, he was in a dark basement that must have belonged to the Hyuugas, due to two pearl-white eyes belonging to a long-haired brunette staring at him in the darkness, with a blushing indigo-haired young girl behind him.

And in front of him...were the two girls who found him unfortunate enough to be passing by the 'rooms'.


"Explain. Yourself!" Sakura seethed, pressing her forehead to Naruto's, fire dancing in the very pit of her blue eyes. She poked him hard on the nose, and her eyes narrowed. "Why did we find you...?"

Normally Naruto would have used this as an excuse to kiss Sakura on her luscious rosebud lips, but not now, as he saw her fury. His only wish, right now, was not to be brought to the burial grounds in a cedar box, and be dropped into a six-foot-tall hole.

Yet he was still tongue-tied at her beauty, and found himself rather wordless. The only words he found himself able to generate were the words "googlyeyedboobie" and "penisaservice" (penisaservices was SO "pen is a service", whatever that meant), both of which sounded suspiciously perverted. He would have uttered the latter, if not for noticing Sakura's pale hand beginning to inch toward his throat.

Suddenly his tongue began working on its own, and Naruto found himself ridiculously caught in an intricate, tangled web of the fine thread of false stories. Currently, he heard his voice saying, "And then this big fat bald eagle dropped me into a mountain full of ashes and glass shards so I climbed out of it and then a crow said 'Hi stupid' and I followed the crow to a bottle full of pebbles and then I dumped the pebbles on my head and then it hurt so I went to Pervy Sage's shop where I got some ramen at Ichiraku's and..."

Sakura rapped him on the head. It hurt.

"Now I know what you sound like when you're lying. So what really happened, huh?"

The fire in Sakura's eyes must have liked Naruto today.

"I got some ramen at Ichiraku's," he mustered feebly.

"What Naruto really means," a deep voice belonging to the male Hyuuga said, "is that he spied on you two because he felt like it. Am I right, Naruto, or must I plunge into your deepest thoughts and wishes?"

It was hard to determine any emotion in Neji's eyes, but Naruto sensed something bad.

"No..."

"That means," Sakura's grip tightened, "you did spy on us?"

"I didn't spy! I was simply -"

Naruto's legs went jelly, and his sky blue eyes flew open wide. His hands shook, and everything seemed to be frozen: For shrewd Sakura had leaned in and slammed her glossy pink lips atop of his. She now drew back, traces of a grin visible on her face, not caring a tiny bit about the stares Neji and Ino were feeding her, nor the fact that Hinata fainted.

"He wasn't a half bad kisser. Oh well, that ought to get some real information out him."


PLEASE READ: I'm not sure if I should continue this or not. If readers tell me to, I will, but if you like it just the way it is, well...then I'll leave it alone. Did you have a good time reading? I admit, this is really difficult, because after writing about Vocaloids - who really don't have a staged personality - I have to resort to Naruto's inner personality. I hope I didn't make him seem too OC.

If I did, please tell me. Hard reviews are fine, but don't make them the most harsh you can. I prefer constructive criticism type, not flames. ;)

~Unyielding Wish