Okay so after realising there is a serious lack of Zsa Zsa/Leon fiction, I thought I'd have a ago. After all I have to satify my obsession some way :P


If Leon was honest then perhaps admitting you were in love with the girl you'd just shagged in a graveyard and only known for 2 weeks– might have been a mistake.

Especially since said girl clearly had a commitment issue.

But despite himself (and the glare of death Zsa Zsa sent him when she finally turned up at the flat – vodka in one hand and green hair dye in the other), he couldn't take it back.

He wasn't an expert on love. No one had exactly told him when the right moment was to tell a girl that you loved them – his Dad was too busy sucking on a bottle of Budweiser – so most of his advice came from romantic comedies, where proclaiming your undying love after...well... usually worked.

Even if you had screwed your beloved in front of her dead father.

But he was not going to back down.

Which is how he found himself outside Zsa Zsa's door at 3 PM, irrationally worried about her dying her hair green.

What? He liked blue.

"Zsa?"

"Fuck off Leon."

"We did that all ready didn't we?"

There was muffled thud as something hit at the door. Okay... clearly humour was not going to get him the girl. He felt slightly cheated – Hugh Grant always made it seem so effortless. "Sorry. Look can't I just come in?"

There was no reply.

"Zsa?"

Nothing.

"Zsa Zsa?"

Silence.

"Zsa Zsa?"

The door was pulled open so quickly Leon's neck almost snapped from trying to get out the way. "Zsa-", something pink and torpedo shaped hit his forehead with a painful squeak, and the door was slapped shut again with the same fury it had been opened with.

Leon blinked.

"Okay. I'll leave you alone shall I?" He bent down and picked up the thing that had been thrown at him. It was one those little troll things with crazy hair – well least he knew where Zsa Zsa got her fashion tips.

The thought of hair brought him back to the green hair dye. "Uh, Zsa? Can you just not do anything hasty? Like... I dunno, say dye your hair?"

He didn't expect an answer, but Zsa Zsa's reply came half muffled, half curious through the door. "Why?"

"I just like blue." He shrugged to himself, "it suits you."


When Zsa Zsa finally emerged from her room, sober and grouchy, but with blue hair still intact; Fat Boy and Mercy had returned and were busy arguing good naturedly over the laptop.

She leant against the door frame and eyed Leon wearily as he grinned.

"What?"

"You decided to stay blue then?"

Zsa Zsa shrugged nonchalantly, despite the smile tugging at her lips. "Apparently, it suits me."

"It does... cold, icy and in your face."

Leon's laugh was drowned out by Zsa Zsa's growl as she launched herself at him, pillow in hand. "That's it! You die Small!"


The next day, Leon found the green hair dye in the bin, unopened and the troll neatly placed back on Zsa Zsa's bedside table.

Maybe he was better at this love stuff then he first thought, after all perfection just takes a bit of practice.